0000 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:10,000 YoubetCash.net Agen Judi Online Aman & Terpercaya 000 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:15,000 Bonus Cashback Bola 6% Bonus Rollingan 0,80% 00 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:20,000 Welcome Bonus Rp 25.000 Extra Bonus Tambahan Withdraw Rp 2.000.000 0 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:25,000 CashBack Mix Parlay 100% Bonus Ajak teman 45,2% 1 00:00:11,984 --> 00:00:16,984 luck16 2 00:00:22,495 --> 00:00:24,364 The letters of the alphabet teach us 3 00:00:24,498 --> 00:00:25,966 to be confident. 4 00:00:26,699 --> 00:00:30,271 ♪ A is always ♪ 5 00:00:30,403 --> 00:00:32,740 ♪ Be yourself ♪ 6 00:00:37,110 --> 00:00:40,747 ♪ C is for chasing All of your dreams ♪ 7 00:00:40,881 --> 00:00:44,384 ♪ D, yay ♪ 8 00:00:44,518 --> 00:00:47,921 ♪ E is for everyone having ♪ 9 00:00:48,054 --> 00:00:49,423 Fuck! 10 00:00:49,555 --> 00:00:50,557 Hold on, wait, there's something... 11 00:00:50,691 --> 00:00:51,792 - Shut up. - No, I got something. 12 00:00:51,926 --> 00:00:53,527 - I'm almost there. - Hold on. 13 00:00:53,661 --> 00:00:55,730 - Shut up. - What the hell is this? 14 00:01:02,804 --> 00:01:03,737 Wait. 15 00:01:05,972 --> 00:01:07,007 What's going on? 16 00:01:07,840 --> 00:01:09,276 - Where are you going? - I'll let you finish up. 17 00:01:09,409 --> 00:01:11,012 Hey, you gonna leave me hanging? 18 00:01:11,144 --> 00:01:12,512 Nice meeting you. 19 00:01:12,646 --> 00:01:14,847 Come on, can't you give a guy a hand? 20 00:01:14,981 --> 00:01:16,683 I'm sure you can figure it out. 21 00:01:16,816 --> 00:01:18,351 Oh, go fuck yourself. 22 00:01:18,484 --> 00:01:20,853 I do. I get off faster that way. 23 00:01:21,287 --> 00:01:22,488 - Oh! - Whoa. 24 00:01:22,621 --> 00:01:24,025 Eyes on the road, please. 25 00:01:24,158 --> 00:01:25,326 Watch where you're going. 26 00:01:25,459 --> 00:01:26,927 You walk backwards and I should watch where I'm going? 27 00:01:27,060 --> 00:01:29,197 Yeah, sure, that makes a lot of sense. 28 00:01:32,933 --> 00:01:34,301 Parent-teacher conference. 29 00:01:34,435 --> 00:01:35,736 Yeah, right. 30 00:01:36,537 --> 00:01:37,771 - Ms. Kelly. - You caught me. 31 00:01:37,905 --> 00:01:39,739 Not exactly the kindergarten teacher type. 32 00:01:39,873 --> 00:01:41,775 Excuse me, you know smoking indoors has been illegal 33 00:01:41,909 --> 00:01:43,310 for like 10 years, right? 34 00:01:43,444 --> 00:01:46,546 What? No, someone definitely would have told me. 35 00:01:49,283 --> 00:01:51,751 You know, you really shouldn't light that. 36 00:01:51,885 --> 00:01:53,153 Calm down, hall monitor. 37 00:01:53,287 --> 00:01:55,690 If anyone's getting cancer around here, it's me. 38 00:02:16,076 --> 00:02:17,110 Shit. 39 00:02:29,288 --> 00:02:31,223 - Is this... - Sex addicts? 40 00:02:31,358 --> 00:02:32,593 It's a room full of 'em, 41 00:02:32,727 --> 00:02:34,729 so welcome to the sausage party, sister. 42 00:02:34,861 --> 00:02:35,995 You guys meet in a grade school? 43 00:02:36,129 --> 00:02:37,864 No one thinks that's a little pervy? 44 00:02:37,997 --> 00:02:40,334 Well, we used to meet in the basement over at St. Patrick's... 45 00:02:40,467 --> 00:02:41,901 Is that any good? 46 00:02:42,036 --> 00:02:43,903 I've had better but I'm... 47 00:02:44,038 --> 00:02:45,072 Great. 48 00:02:52,312 --> 00:02:53,614 Sorry I'm late. 49 00:02:53,747 --> 00:02:56,017 Quite a line in the men's room, believe it or not. 50 00:03:02,788 --> 00:03:04,090 He's the group leader? 51 00:03:04,692 --> 00:03:06,960 Tell me about it. 52 00:03:07,093 --> 00:03:09,829 He's certainly not making this easy for us. 53 00:03:16,436 --> 00:03:18,338 Well, this is awkward. 54 00:03:18,472 --> 00:03:20,106 I obviously don't need to be here 55 00:03:20,241 --> 00:03:21,909 but if you could just sign this little piece of paper 56 00:03:22,043 --> 00:03:23,778 saying I was though, then I'll shove off 57 00:03:23,911 --> 00:03:26,580 and avoid making this any weirder than it already is. 58 00:03:26,713 --> 00:03:28,081 Okay? 59 00:03:30,717 --> 00:03:33,020 How about we skip the intro today 60 00:03:33,152 --> 00:03:35,521 and dive right into a newcomer share? 61 00:03:35,655 --> 00:03:37,491 Darla here would like to go first. 62 00:03:37,623 --> 00:03:39,425 Hi, Darla. 63 00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:41,495 Oh. Sup. 64 00:03:41,627 --> 00:03:43,563 Uh, I was actually just leaving. 65 00:03:43,698 --> 00:03:45,298 If you could just sign that. 66 00:03:45,431 --> 00:03:46,732 So soon? 67 00:03:46,866 --> 00:03:50,836 What, was it something we did or didn't do? 68 00:03:50,971 --> 00:03:54,473 Oh, no, I was just regretting that I came. 69 00:03:54,608 --> 00:03:57,411 Well, it says here that you were court-ordered to attend. 70 00:03:57,544 --> 00:04:01,081 Yeah, I don't really know how any of this works, so... 71 00:04:01,215 --> 00:04:02,816 I'm sure you can figure it out. 72 00:04:02,949 --> 00:04:05,885 - Oh. - Won't you have a seat? 73 00:04:07,221 --> 00:04:08,622 Great to have you. 74 00:04:09,522 --> 00:04:10,757 All right. 75 00:04:10,890 --> 00:04:14,027 Most kids got toys or a pet that year. 76 00:04:14,927 --> 00:04:16,831 I got a pack of smokes. 77 00:04:16,963 --> 00:04:21,033 It's a right of passage in my family, so now here I am. 78 00:04:22,002 --> 00:04:25,305 Youngest of seven and the only one in treatment. 79 00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:28,442 Thank you for your courage, Aida. 80 00:04:28,574 --> 00:04:32,278 I hope you come to see this group as your surrogate family. 81 00:04:33,879 --> 00:04:35,815 Who'd like to share next? 82 00:04:37,684 --> 00:04:38,919 Bailey? 83 00:04:40,521 --> 00:04:42,355 Welcome back. It's been a while. 84 00:04:42,488 --> 00:04:44,056 What's going on? 85 00:04:44,690 --> 00:04:48,861 I'm just, uh, stopping in. 86 00:04:49,428 --> 00:04:52,432 Had my one year check-in. 87 00:04:53,500 --> 00:04:56,302 Uh, waiting to hear the results. 88 00:04:56,435 --> 00:04:58,004 It's probably fine. 89 00:04:58,139 --> 00:05:00,774 There's nothing wrong with a little scanxiety. 90 00:05:00,908 --> 00:05:02,877 We've all been there, right? 91 00:05:04,444 --> 00:05:06,346 Who else wants to share? 92 00:05:38,377 --> 00:05:42,382 We actually have ten for a thousand... 93 00:05:44,684 --> 00:05:46,987 Yeah, I'll take your number down. 94 00:05:53,059 --> 00:05:54,794 Bailey, it's your mother. 95 00:05:54,927 --> 00:05:56,495 Please don't send me to voice mail. 96 00:05:56,629 --> 00:05:58,331 I know how technology works. 97 00:05:58,464 --> 00:06:00,066 I just texted you a photo of your father 98 00:06:00,201 --> 00:06:01,835 in front of his new gym. 99 00:06:01,968 --> 00:06:03,770 Isn't he handsome? 100 00:06:03,903 --> 00:06:06,507 He'd love to show you the new location next time you're in town. 101 00:06:06,639 --> 00:06:09,475 Speaking of, Karen Carthright is throwing 102 00:06:09,610 --> 00:06:11,411 a retirement party next week. 103 00:06:11,545 --> 00:06:13,847 I hear Liz will be there. 104 00:06:13,980 --> 00:06:15,716 You should be there too. 105 00:06:15,848 --> 00:06:18,450 We'd love to see you both, together. 106 00:06:18,584 --> 00:06:20,454 Okay, son, love you. 107 00:06:36,103 --> 00:06:39,006 It's time, man. Seriously. 108 00:06:39,906 --> 00:06:42,242 You gotta get rid of that photo behind the desk. 109 00:06:43,374 --> 00:06:43,342 It's fucking weird. 110 00:06:43,476 --> 00:06:46,212 Oh, is that still? Oh, that's right, yeah. 111 00:06:46,346 --> 00:06:49,048 You just need to get laid, all right? And move on. 112 00:06:49,182 --> 00:06:53,086 Speaking of, she's been checking you out over there, hard. 113 00:06:53,220 --> 00:06:55,823 Go holler at her, see for yourself. 114 00:07:05,264 --> 00:07:07,801 Hey, Liz. 115 00:07:08,569 --> 00:07:09,802 What are you doing here? 116 00:07:09,937 --> 00:07:11,571 The garbage man tried to take this again today 117 00:07:11,704 --> 00:07:14,774 even I've assured them many times you would come by to pick it up. 118 00:07:14,908 --> 00:07:16,609 Oh, yeah, I'm sorry about that. 119 00:07:16,742 --> 00:07:17,976 It's fine, it's the last one. 120 00:07:18,110 --> 00:07:19,545 Yeah, but you know, I was actually hoping 121 00:07:19,678 --> 00:07:21,781 that we could go through this stuff together, you know. 122 00:07:21,915 --> 00:07:23,550 A lot of this stuff is actually yours. 123 00:07:23,682 --> 00:07:25,451 Like this. 124 00:07:25,586 --> 00:07:26,920 That is not mine. 125 00:07:27,052 --> 00:07:28,588 Yeah, I got that for your birthday last year. 126 00:07:28,721 --> 00:07:29,855 You know, I got the matching ones? 127 00:07:29,990 --> 00:07:31,458 I really appreciate the thought, Bailey, 128 00:07:31,591 --> 00:07:34,093 but I don't think we should have matching snuggies anymore. 129 00:07:34,228 --> 00:07:36,096 Mostly because we're adults. 130 00:07:36,230 --> 00:07:38,564 Oh, you know, it's funny, I don't even draw anymore. 131 00:07:38,699 --> 00:07:41,468 Yeah, I spend my time doing more productive stuff, like you said. 132 00:07:41,601 --> 00:07:42,534 Good. 133 00:07:42,668 --> 00:07:43,903 Okay, I gotta run. 134 00:07:44,036 --> 00:07:46,139 Uh, hey, what are you up to later? 135 00:07:46,273 --> 00:07:48,375 I was thinking maybe we could, like, grab lunch, 136 00:07:48,507 --> 00:07:50,709 something like, oh, you know, there's a new exhibit at the... 137 00:07:50,843 --> 00:07:52,111 We've talked about this. 138 00:07:52,245 --> 00:07:53,846 You need to start hanging out with other people. 139 00:07:53,980 --> 00:07:56,081 At the very least, call your parents. 140 00:07:56,216 --> 00:07:58,352 My mom said they're really worried about you. 141 00:07:58,485 --> 00:07:59,586 I really have to go. 142 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:00,721 Yeah. 143 00:08:00,853 --> 00:08:01,854 - Okay. - Cool. 144 00:08:01,987 --> 00:08:03,456 It's good to see you. 145 00:08:31,752 --> 00:08:33,153 Darla Bean! 146 00:08:34,221 --> 00:08:37,124 - Yes, your highness? - Get in here, now! 147 00:08:43,931 --> 00:08:44,764 Hey, Frank. 148 00:08:44,898 --> 00:08:46,300 Ooh, new desk? 149 00:08:46,432 --> 00:08:47,533 I like it. 150 00:08:48,701 --> 00:08:49,735 What the fuck is this? 151 00:08:49,870 --> 00:08:51,038 Based on its current condition, 152 00:08:51,171 --> 00:08:53,006 I'm gonna say my latest column? 153 00:08:53,139 --> 00:08:55,009 I'm guessing no gold stars? 154 00:08:55,142 --> 00:08:57,510 "Nothing kills the high of a Friday night office hookup 155 00:08:57,644 --> 00:09:00,547 like a Saturday morning brunch and 'bortion." 156 00:09:00,679 --> 00:09:02,248 Hashtag brunch and 'bort. 157 00:09:03,683 --> 00:09:05,017 You think this is funny. 158 00:09:05,152 --> 00:09:06,586 - Yes? - I don't know what's worse, 159 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:08,721 the fact that you think it's okay to lampoon an abortion... 160 00:09:08,855 --> 00:09:09,889 Well, if you can't laugh about it. 161 00:09:10,023 --> 00:09:10,923 Or this. 162 00:09:13,692 --> 00:09:14,693 Oh. 163 00:09:14,827 --> 00:09:15,696 Come on and turn. 164 00:09:15,828 --> 00:09:16,995 - What? - Fuck me. 165 00:09:17,129 --> 00:09:18,164 I am! 166 00:09:18,298 --> 00:09:19,600 I'm really glad you like the desk, 167 00:09:19,732 --> 00:09:21,300 seeing as it's coming out of your severance. 168 00:09:21,434 --> 00:09:23,236 You told me to write about office romance. 169 00:09:23,370 --> 00:09:24,637 And instead you made a sex tape. 170 00:09:24,770 --> 00:09:25,771 Wait, you got an abortion? 171 00:09:25,905 --> 00:09:27,406 Was it mine? 172 00:09:27,541 --> 00:09:29,342 Yes, Franklin, you knocked me up so fast, 173 00:09:29,475 --> 00:09:30,878 I had to Uber straight to the clinic. 174 00:09:31,010 --> 00:09:32,346 - This isn't a joke. - I didn't get an abortion. 175 00:09:32,479 --> 00:09:33,980 Did you guys never go to health class? 176 00:09:34,114 --> 00:09:35,848 First, I bail you out of a sexual harassment case. 177 00:09:35,981 --> 00:09:37,183 Oh please, I was flirting. 178 00:09:37,317 --> 00:09:38,918 And now you're fucking interns at the office. 179 00:09:39,052 --> 00:09:40,354 And you get another titillating column 180 00:09:40,486 --> 00:09:42,488 and he gets another notch on his tiny little belt. 181 00:09:42,621 --> 00:09:43,823 Everyone wins. 182 00:09:43,956 --> 00:09:45,893 I put up with your shit because your stories were good. 183 00:09:46,025 --> 00:09:48,827 But now they're... they're unrelatable 184 00:09:48,961 --> 00:09:50,462 and, frankly, offensive. 185 00:09:50,596 --> 00:09:51,764 Well... 186 00:09:52,198 --> 00:09:53,332 You're fired. 187 00:09:53,466 --> 00:09:54,234 So are you. 188 00:09:54,366 --> 00:09:56,202 But I don't get paid! 189 00:09:56,336 --> 00:09:57,370 Tanya. 190 00:09:58,572 --> 00:09:59,740 You can't fire me. 191 00:09:59,873 --> 00:10:01,675 My column is a very integral part of this publication. 192 00:10:01,807 --> 00:10:04,443 The column is, yes, but you're not the one writing it anymore. 193 00:10:04,576 --> 00:10:06,679 I am the column! 194 00:10:06,813 --> 00:10:10,283 I inspire millions of women to reignite their burnout sex lives. 195 00:10:10,417 --> 00:10:12,985 I'm like the Oprah of orgasms. 196 00:10:13,119 --> 00:10:14,488 Every lady gets one! 197 00:10:14,620 --> 00:10:16,423 Well, they'll just have to get them from someone else. 198 00:10:16,556 --> 00:10:20,093 I find the weirdest, raciest shit and I live it. 199 00:10:20,225 --> 00:10:21,794 Who else is gonna do that? 200 00:10:21,927 --> 00:10:23,797 Look, you're not the only nympho that can formulate a sentence. 201 00:10:23,929 --> 00:10:26,165 Call me Tanya! 202 00:10:26,299 --> 00:10:28,100 - Tanya. - Say that I'm the boss. 203 00:10:28,235 --> 00:10:30,704 - You're the boss. - Yeah, I am! 204 00:10:30,836 --> 00:10:31,937 Yes! 205 00:10:32,072 --> 00:10:33,506 Okay, I get it. 206 00:10:33,639 --> 00:10:34,707 I fucked up, I did. 207 00:10:34,841 --> 00:10:36,808 I vow to keep going to that group of degenerates, 208 00:10:36,942 --> 00:10:39,545 never boink another coworker, and to be more responsible. 209 00:10:39,679 --> 00:10:41,480 - We cool? - Stop by HR on your way out. 210 00:10:41,615 --> 00:10:43,783 They'll go through your severance package. 211 00:10:45,119 --> 00:10:47,921 Tanya, I got a rap sheet working for you. 212 00:10:48,053 --> 00:10:49,722 Nobody else is gonna hire me now. 213 00:10:51,124 --> 00:10:53,159 This is all I'm good at. 214 00:10:54,927 --> 00:10:56,362 I'm sorry. 215 00:10:56,495 --> 00:10:59,632 But your stories lately just aren't worth fighting for. 216 00:11:10,476 --> 00:11:11,877 Please tell me you left. 217 00:11:12,011 --> 00:11:13,246 Got it. 218 00:11:19,184 --> 00:11:20,119 Where are you going? 219 00:11:20,253 --> 00:11:21,555 Find a story. 220 00:11:21,687 --> 00:11:24,023 Something good enough to put this bullshit to bed. 221 00:11:25,692 --> 00:11:26,759 Oh fuck. 222 00:11:26,894 --> 00:11:28,495 Fuck. Stop. 223 00:11:34,433 --> 00:11:36,635 Go back to your makeup tutorials. 224 00:11:36,769 --> 00:11:40,606 God, oh god, oh god, oh god, yes, yes, yes! 225 00:12:01,794 --> 00:12:03,362 Ah ah. 226 00:12:04,563 --> 00:12:05,264 I'm sorry. 227 00:12:05,398 --> 00:12:07,768 Happens all the time. 228 00:12:11,270 --> 00:12:14,173 You might want to sit down. 229 00:12:46,740 --> 00:12:48,408 Please don't send me to voice mail, Liz. 230 00:12:48,541 --> 00:12:49,709 I know how technology works. 231 00:12:49,842 --> 00:12:51,543 Bailey, what the hell are you doing here? 232 00:12:51,677 --> 00:12:53,647 - I saw your story. - Okay, you need to get off my Instagram. 233 00:12:53,779 --> 00:12:56,082 I just got some really bad news. 234 00:12:56,216 --> 00:12:57,551 Can we please? 235 00:12:57,683 --> 00:12:59,151 Oh, terrific. 236 00:12:59,285 --> 00:13:00,452 Uh, no. 237 00:13:00,586 --> 00:13:02,556 Can you please bring another one of those? 238 00:13:04,057 --> 00:13:06,493 Wow, that is really good. 239 00:13:06,625 --> 00:13:08,028 What is this place anyway? 240 00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:10,863 Like some sort of like hipster hat bar or something? 241 00:13:10,998 --> 00:13:12,365 Okay, you need to leave now. 242 00:13:12,498 --> 00:13:13,800 Liz, this is serious. 243 00:13:13,933 --> 00:13:15,033 Yeah, it always is with you. 244 00:13:15,168 --> 00:13:16,802 You can figure this out on your own. 245 00:13:16,936 --> 00:13:18,370 Oh, thank you. 246 00:13:18,504 --> 00:13:20,706 No, okay, he's not my date. Please stop giving him drinks. 247 00:13:20,841 --> 00:13:21,674 You're on a date? 248 00:13:21,807 --> 00:13:23,676 Yes, I'm dating, and so should you. 249 00:13:23,809 --> 00:13:25,211 Now go. 250 00:13:25,945 --> 00:13:27,080 Okay, I'm sorry. 251 00:13:27,212 --> 00:13:28,514 Look, I know I haven't been great 252 00:13:28,648 --> 00:13:32,384 about giving you your space, but this is different. 253 00:13:32,519 --> 00:13:34,387 Can we please just talk? 254 00:13:34,519 --> 00:13:36,789 Somewhere preferably with less of these hats? 255 00:13:36,923 --> 00:13:40,226 I mean, just, it's all the same. It's like they sell them here. 256 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:42,528 No, no, we can't. I'm leaving town tonight. 257 00:13:42,662 --> 00:13:43,330 Forever? 258 00:13:43,462 --> 00:13:44,697 No, not forever. 259 00:13:44,831 --> 00:13:46,667 I'm going home for my mom's retirement party. 260 00:13:46,799 --> 00:13:50,370 And honestly, I feel like we shouldn't see each other for a while. 261 00:13:51,538 --> 00:13:52,572 Liz. 262 00:13:53,974 --> 00:13:54,908 I love you. 263 00:13:55,042 --> 00:13:56,242 Look, Bails. 264 00:13:57,309 --> 00:14:00,446 How are we supposed to know that we're meant to be together 265 00:14:00,580 --> 00:14:03,083 if we've never been with anybody else? 266 00:14:03,216 --> 00:14:06,019 So you want me to be with someone else, 267 00:14:06,153 --> 00:14:07,119 so then we can be together? 268 00:14:07,253 --> 00:14:08,421 No, you're missing the point. 269 00:14:08,554 --> 00:14:11,224 Your white knight has returned, princess. 270 00:14:11,890 --> 00:14:12,724 Who's this dude? 271 00:14:12,859 --> 00:14:14,093 Who is this dude? 272 00:14:14,226 --> 00:14:16,696 Okay, first of all, not a princess, don't need saving. 273 00:14:16,830 --> 00:14:19,966 And second of all, this is my old friend. 274 00:14:20,099 --> 00:14:21,735 Bailey was just saying goodbye. 275 00:14:30,210 --> 00:14:31,644 Can you pick up the pace, bro? 276 00:14:40,820 --> 00:14:42,923 Gonna need another glass of that. 277 00:15:12,150 --> 00:15:14,253 I'll take a whiskey, neat. 278 00:15:14,386 --> 00:15:16,722 Just kidding. 279 00:15:17,456 --> 00:15:19,525 No, this warm sludge looks delicious. 280 00:15:19,658 --> 00:15:20,894 Want to fill me up? 281 00:15:21,695 --> 00:15:23,697 You know, this is only my second meeting, 282 00:15:23,830 --> 00:15:26,966 but what do you say we blow this sad little circlejerk 283 00:15:27,100 --> 00:15:29,369 and get the hell out of here? 284 00:15:30,736 --> 00:15:32,972 Hey, hey. 285 00:15:33,105 --> 00:15:34,139 Tom. 286 00:15:35,008 --> 00:15:37,076 Whew, honey, you look a little flushed. 287 00:15:37,576 --> 00:15:39,045 You wanna have a seat? 288 00:15:39,544 --> 00:15:41,014 Just right over there. 289 00:15:41,147 --> 00:15:42,448 Bye, Tom. 290 00:15:43,482 --> 00:15:45,350 Are you trying to give that man a heart attack? 291 00:15:45,485 --> 00:15:47,286 Why do you take this shit so seriously? 292 00:15:47,419 --> 00:15:48,421 Because it works. 293 00:15:48,554 --> 00:15:49,688 You know what? 294 00:15:49,822 --> 00:15:51,524 I know a sponsor I can introduce you to. 295 00:15:51,658 --> 00:15:53,560 I don't need a sponsor. 296 00:15:53,692 --> 00:15:56,562 No offense, but I'm not an addict. 297 00:15:56,696 --> 00:15:59,264 I write a sex column and I'm here doing some research. 298 00:15:59,399 --> 00:16:00,466 Sex column? 299 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:02,201 Darla, this might be a joke to you, 300 00:16:02,335 --> 00:16:03,970 but it's very real for us. 301 00:16:04,104 --> 00:16:05,372 So why don't you have a seat 302 00:16:05,504 --> 00:16:07,240 and treat the people in here with some respect? 303 00:16:07,373 --> 00:16:10,477 Maybe that way you'll find something worth writing about. 304 00:16:13,312 --> 00:16:15,948 Step eight. 305 00:16:16,750 --> 00:16:19,317 Make a list of all persons we have harmed 306 00:16:19,451 --> 00:16:21,721 and be willing to make amends. 307 00:16:23,255 --> 00:16:24,524 This is a tough one. 308 00:16:24,657 --> 00:16:28,461 But in order to understand the extent and pattern 309 00:16:28,595 --> 00:16:31,965 of my addiction, it helped me to recognize those 310 00:16:32,097 --> 00:16:33,132 that I had hurt. 311 00:16:33,265 --> 00:16:36,001 Does he think vaginas have teeth? 312 00:16:36,134 --> 00:16:38,904 In your case, I'm pretty sure it has fangs. 313 00:16:39,038 --> 00:16:43,543 I brought paper and pencils and, hell, I even have a road map 314 00:16:43,677 --> 00:16:45,979 for those who need help jogging their memory. 315 00:16:46,111 --> 00:16:49,748 This step helped me earn back my wife's trust 316 00:16:49,881 --> 00:16:52,885 and get my impulses under control. 317 00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:55,654 Did you write my name down 318 00:16:55,788 --> 00:16:57,990 or did you put your wife's name down again? 319 00:16:58,125 --> 00:17:00,993 You know, you might actually need this. 320 00:17:01,126 --> 00:17:02,161 A whole map. 321 00:17:02,294 --> 00:17:03,629 Circle all the places I've fucked? 322 00:17:03,763 --> 00:17:05,832 Are you sure this isn't gonna make you jealous? 323 00:17:05,964 --> 00:17:07,032 Oh, have at it. 324 00:17:28,421 --> 00:17:29,689 What? 325 00:17:36,461 --> 00:17:38,664 Okay, I'm ready to share. 326 00:17:39,199 --> 00:17:40,833 - This is me? - Oh shit. 327 00:17:41,433 --> 00:17:42,667 Oh, a lot of new faces. 328 00:17:42,801 --> 00:17:44,770 Hey, excuse me, sir, I think you're mistaken... 329 00:17:44,903 --> 00:17:46,138 No. 330 00:17:46,271 --> 00:17:47,874 I think I got this. 331 00:17:48,740 --> 00:17:51,845 Well, it's back, baby. 332 00:17:51,978 --> 00:17:54,747 T-motherfu-C. 333 00:17:54,881 --> 00:17:57,583 That's testicular cancer, if you're nasty. 334 00:17:57,717 --> 00:17:59,518 I got cancer in my testicles. 335 00:17:59,652 --> 00:18:02,121 You know, and I already survived it once. 336 00:18:02,255 --> 00:18:06,459 They cut... They cut off my left testicle. 337 00:18:06,593 --> 00:18:09,260 And so I was all good, fairy-tale ending. 338 00:18:09,394 --> 00:18:12,030 Man loses ball, call it a day. 339 00:18:12,164 --> 00:18:16,001 Then, now, mysteriously there's a magical lump 340 00:18:16,134 --> 00:18:18,939 on my right guy, so the doctor says 341 00:18:19,071 --> 00:18:22,640 we won't know how bad it is till we chop it off. 342 00:18:22,775 --> 00:18:24,478 And mind you, he didn't say chop it off... 343 00:18:24,611 --> 00:18:26,646 Should someone tell this guy that AA is upstairs? 344 00:18:26,778 --> 00:18:29,082 But supposedly there's a chance it's not malignant, 345 00:18:29,214 --> 00:18:32,251 so you know, I'll probably survive it. 346 00:18:32,384 --> 00:18:33,486 I won't die from it. 347 00:18:33,619 --> 00:18:34,653 Lucky me. 348 00:18:34,787 --> 00:18:37,323 But now, I'm an eligible bachelor, 349 00:18:37,455 --> 00:18:39,357 who's gonna want me now, you know? 350 00:18:39,491 --> 00:18:43,730 Right when maybe had a chance to get back with my ex-fiancée. 351 00:18:50,903 --> 00:18:51,971 Hey. 352 00:18:52,872 --> 00:18:55,709 You're Kindergarten Kelly. 353 00:18:55,842 --> 00:18:59,311 I remember you 'cause I remember from the other room. 354 00:18:59,444 --> 00:19:00,913 Careful, everybody, look out. 355 00:19:01,047 --> 00:19:02,882 This one's a predator. 356 00:19:03,016 --> 00:19:07,220 Told you not to smoke. Lo and behold, here you are too. 357 00:19:08,788 --> 00:19:11,724 Hey, actually I recognize you too. 358 00:19:11,857 --> 00:19:14,594 Let's get you some water. Maybe a stomach pump? 359 00:19:14,727 --> 00:19:15,695 That'd be fun. 360 00:19:15,827 --> 00:19:18,263 Yeah. You're good-lookin'. 361 00:19:18,396 --> 00:19:20,066 Let's get you outta here. 362 00:19:20,199 --> 00:19:24,036 Hey, you know, actually it's pretty serendipitous that you're here. 363 00:19:24,170 --> 00:19:29,976 And on account of my junk being sent to the nether realms, 364 00:19:30,109 --> 00:19:33,478 maybe you could help me with a little secret mission? 365 00:19:33,613 --> 00:19:35,247 - Oh yeah? - Yeah. 366 00:19:35,881 --> 00:19:39,451 It's intercourse with me. 367 00:19:39,585 --> 00:19:41,287 Oh, my God. Nice. 368 00:19:41,420 --> 00:19:42,322 Wow. 369 00:19:42,454 --> 00:19:43,788 Well, I'm flattered. 370 00:19:43,923 --> 00:19:45,990 And I'm very sorry about your balls, 371 00:19:46,125 --> 00:19:49,229 but man, do you have the wrong room. 372 00:19:57,103 --> 00:19:58,171 Whoa. 373 00:19:58,671 --> 00:20:00,340 Whoops. 374 00:20:00,472 --> 00:20:01,941 My bad, y'all. 375 00:20:02,709 --> 00:20:04,243 All right, let's get you outta here. 376 00:20:04,376 --> 00:20:05,411 - Yeah. - Can you walk? 377 00:20:05,544 --> 00:20:07,079 I walk with the best, watch this. 378 00:20:07,712 --> 00:20:09,014 There he goes. 379 00:20:09,147 --> 00:20:10,515 Okay. 380 00:20:10,650 --> 00:20:13,352 Psh. You wouldn't expect it, I walk fine. 381 00:20:13,486 --> 00:20:14,720 Step eight though. 382 00:20:14,854 --> 00:20:16,556 You guys are all doing it, and I'm proud of ya. 383 00:20:16,689 --> 00:20:18,258 I'm proud of ya. 384 00:20:19,459 --> 00:20:21,760 You guys, one day at a time. 385 00:20:21,894 --> 00:20:24,330 Oh, it's right there, says it on the thing. 386 00:20:26,298 --> 00:20:27,833 We're good, yeah, bring that. 387 00:20:27,967 --> 00:20:29,669 Don't wanna waste it. 388 00:20:31,403 --> 00:20:35,709 I'm really sorry. I have no idea what that was. 389 00:20:38,344 --> 00:20:41,814 All right, so with one, how does that work exactly? 390 00:20:41,946 --> 00:20:44,717 Do you still get hard, just... 391 00:20:46,152 --> 00:20:47,220 Oh, okay. 392 00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:48,554 You okay? 393 00:20:48,688 --> 00:20:49,889 I saved it. 394 00:20:50,021 --> 00:20:51,957 Got most of it out in the parking lot anyway. 395 00:20:52,092 --> 00:20:53,325 Good. 396 00:20:53,459 --> 00:20:54,794 Please don't puke on me. 397 00:20:54,928 --> 00:20:57,763 I'm less likely to bang somebody if I get puked on. 398 00:20:57,896 --> 00:21:00,165 Oh, you mean my very charming proposition? 399 00:21:00,299 --> 00:21:02,634 Yeah, you made quite a speech back there. 400 00:21:02,768 --> 00:21:04,769 Yeah, I have no more dignity to lose. 401 00:21:04,903 --> 00:21:06,705 There's not even napkins, it's ridiculous. 402 00:21:06,838 --> 00:21:08,307 I have some tissues, here. 403 00:21:12,744 --> 00:21:13,745 You going somewhere? 404 00:21:13,878 --> 00:21:15,180 No, absolutely not. 405 00:21:15,314 --> 00:21:17,883 Just some dumb exercise that douchebag made us do. 406 00:21:18,017 --> 00:21:20,753 Probably so he could brag about his own sexual conquests. 407 00:21:20,886 --> 00:21:22,288 What kind of exercise is that? 408 00:21:22,422 --> 00:21:23,756 I think we were supposed to make a list 409 00:21:23,888 --> 00:21:25,824 of all the people that we had sex with 410 00:21:25,958 --> 00:21:28,795 and circle the places on a map. 411 00:21:28,928 --> 00:21:31,764 So they're encouraging you to rehash your sexual history? 412 00:21:31,896 --> 00:21:34,033 But isn't that like triggering? 413 00:21:34,599 --> 00:21:35,734 I don't know. 414 00:21:35,868 --> 00:21:37,502 You have to like revisit all the places? 415 00:21:37,635 --> 00:21:39,238 No, that would be insane. 416 00:21:39,372 --> 00:21:43,910 I mean, all my sexual history could fit on a bar napkin. 417 00:21:44,644 --> 00:21:46,711 - I could help you with that. - Oh yeah? 418 00:21:46,846 --> 00:21:48,948 You wanna revisit all your past romps with me? 419 00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:51,116 Show me how it's done? 420 00:21:55,253 --> 00:21:56,789 That's actually not a bad idea. 421 00:21:56,923 --> 00:21:58,424 Yeah. 422 00:21:58,557 --> 00:21:59,759 No, seriously. 423 00:21:59,892 --> 00:22:02,228 You're about to have a life-changing surgery 424 00:22:02,361 --> 00:22:04,229 and you could have one last hurrah. 425 00:22:04,363 --> 00:22:06,332 Check some things off the old bucket list. 426 00:22:06,464 --> 00:22:07,900 And I would get my... 427 00:22:08,701 --> 00:22:11,103 The catharsis that I need for my therapy. 428 00:22:11,237 --> 00:22:13,005 Aren't you supposed to not be having sex? 429 00:22:13,138 --> 00:22:14,639 It would just be you and me the whole time. 430 00:22:14,773 --> 00:22:15,807 You don't go to the classes. 431 00:22:15,941 --> 00:22:17,509 I go to the classes all the time. 432 00:22:17,643 --> 00:22:19,612 And you're just not supposed to have sex with a lot of people. 433 00:22:19,746 --> 00:22:22,782 The opposite of promiscuity is monogamy. 434 00:22:22,914 --> 00:22:24,682 Wouldn't that be like abstinence? 435 00:22:24,817 --> 00:22:25,884 Agree to disagree. 436 00:22:26,019 --> 00:22:27,787 You'd be helping me with step eight, 437 00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:29,689 with the list of people that I had sex with 438 00:22:29,821 --> 00:22:33,058 and remembering who those people were. 439 00:22:33,192 --> 00:22:35,227 Darla, look. 440 00:22:35,827 --> 00:22:37,863 You're a very nice lady. 441 00:22:37,997 --> 00:22:39,499 I mean, I think, I don't know. 442 00:22:39,632 --> 00:22:42,567 But I can't go on a cross-country trip with you. 443 00:22:42,701 --> 00:22:44,437 I don't even know you. 444 00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:48,774 Fine. 445 00:22:48,907 --> 00:22:50,175 Can I get the check, please? 446 00:22:50,309 --> 00:22:52,845 Thank you, by the way. 447 00:22:52,979 --> 00:22:54,346 I thought we were gonna help each other 448 00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:56,481 but if you're cool with getting sterilized 449 00:22:56,615 --> 00:22:58,517 without so much as a send-off, then that's on you. 450 00:22:58,650 --> 00:23:01,019 Headed for Dallas for my mom's retirement party, 451 00:23:01,153 --> 00:23:04,156 which is next week, and I am so excited! 452 00:23:05,424 --> 00:23:06,459 Wait. 453 00:23:07,393 --> 00:23:09,996 When is this trip supposed to start? 454 00:23:11,564 --> 00:23:13,500 I don't know, tomorrow. 455 00:23:18,738 --> 00:23:20,006 Okay. 456 00:23:21,006 --> 00:23:23,342 - But I have one condition. - Oh yeah? 457 00:23:23,476 --> 00:23:24,344 What's that? 458 00:23:24,477 --> 00:23:26,278 We have to stop in Dallas. 459 00:23:26,412 --> 00:23:29,181 No, I didn't fuck anybody in Dallas, weirdly. 460 00:23:29,315 --> 00:23:33,219 Look, if you want me to go on your sex therapy trip with you, 461 00:23:33,352 --> 00:23:36,389 you have to go to Dallas with me. 462 00:23:36,521 --> 00:23:38,023 Quid pro quo. 463 00:23:38,991 --> 00:23:40,593 Visa versa. 464 00:23:41,027 --> 00:23:43,062 Two peas in a pod. 465 00:23:43,796 --> 00:23:45,431 This a staring contest? 466 00:23:45,565 --> 00:23:48,667 Because if it is, I guarantee you I never lose 'em. 467 00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:50,068 Or have I blinked? 468 00:23:50,202 --> 00:23:53,138 I can't... that was a blink. 469 00:23:55,574 --> 00:23:56,709 Round two. 470 00:24:00,278 --> 00:24:02,448 She's your daughter, figure it out. 471 00:24:03,383 --> 00:24:04,083 Oh, come on. 472 00:24:05,484 --> 00:24:07,886 Jay. Jay! 473 00:24:08,019 --> 00:24:10,823 Uh-huh. Fuck, fuck. 474 00:24:10,955 --> 00:24:12,924 Tanya. I have an idea. 475 00:24:13,057 --> 00:24:15,027 - You're fired, go home. - Hear me out. 476 00:24:15,161 --> 00:24:16,929 I don't have time for this. 477 00:24:17,063 --> 00:24:18,464 I do not have time for you, 478 00:24:18,597 --> 00:24:20,265 I don't have time for my deadbeat ex-husband, 479 00:24:20,398 --> 00:24:21,933 I don't have time for my board of directors, 480 00:24:22,067 --> 00:24:23,301 who don't seem to understand 481 00:24:23,435 --> 00:24:25,169 that we are treading water in a dying industry 482 00:24:25,304 --> 00:24:27,306 because they've never heard of the fucking Internet. 483 00:24:27,439 --> 00:24:29,842 I consider firing you to be a mercy killing. 484 00:24:29,976 --> 00:24:31,577 You're so welcome. 485 00:24:31,711 --> 00:24:33,144 I'm really sorry about all that, by the way, but I have an idea. 486 00:24:33,278 --> 00:24:35,948 What if I went back and I relived my history? 487 00:24:36,082 --> 00:24:37,249 My sexual history. 488 00:24:37,383 --> 00:24:39,818 Every raunchy hookup, every backroom romp, 489 00:24:39,951 --> 00:24:42,087 every dirty debacle, and I do it again. 490 00:24:42,221 --> 00:24:44,923 Everywhere I fucked before, but like a do-over. 491 00:24:45,057 --> 00:24:47,259 - Why? - Because it's never been done before. 492 00:24:47,392 --> 00:24:49,128 And because it'll sell magazines. 493 00:24:49,260 --> 00:24:52,431 And because I really need my job back. 494 00:24:52,565 --> 00:24:55,134 I'm not gonna condone you prostituting yourself for a story. 495 00:24:55,268 --> 00:24:57,002 Yes, wait. But I met this guy. 496 00:24:57,135 --> 00:25:00,440 He has cancer and he's about to lose both of his balls, he's a total mess, 497 00:25:00,573 --> 00:25:03,076 and it'll just be me and him having sex the whole time. 498 00:25:03,209 --> 00:25:05,345 And he's the story. 499 00:25:07,646 --> 00:25:10,014 This guy's really about to be castrated 500 00:25:10,148 --> 00:25:12,183 and he knows that you're writing about him? 501 00:25:12,317 --> 00:25:13,050 Sure. 502 00:25:13,184 --> 00:25:15,086 Yeah, under a pseudonym. 503 00:25:15,221 --> 00:25:18,223 Give me a chance at a feature. 504 00:25:19,025 --> 00:25:21,026 I just fired you, I'm not promoting you. 505 00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:22,762 - Fair. I'll do it as a column piece. - No. 506 00:25:22,894 --> 00:25:27,200 Fine, fine. I will use the blog. The fucking blog. 507 00:25:27,333 --> 00:25:28,601 I will spice up the web presence 508 00:25:28,733 --> 00:25:30,635 for those dinosaur board of directors, you know? 509 00:25:30,769 --> 00:25:32,605 Show 'em what the Internet's really all about. 510 00:25:35,008 --> 00:25:37,644 Please, please consider it? 511 00:25:38,911 --> 00:25:40,880 I want live posts from the road. 512 00:25:41,012 --> 00:25:42,214 I want daily entries 513 00:25:42,347 --> 00:25:44,049 on how this guy's dealing with his condition 514 00:25:44,182 --> 00:25:47,353 and how sex and love change with age and maturity. 515 00:25:47,486 --> 00:25:49,522 - Thank you. - And I'm not paying you. 516 00:25:50,388 --> 00:25:52,391 - Cover my expenses? - No. 517 00:25:52,525 --> 00:25:54,060 Lube? Condoms? 518 00:25:56,295 --> 00:25:57,329 Do not fuck this up. 519 00:25:57,461 --> 00:25:59,698 - What if I nail it? - Then we'll talk. 520 00:26:00,298 --> 00:26:02,167 - Okay, no. - I'm sorry. 521 00:26:02,300 --> 00:26:03,602 I love that shirt. Ah! 522 00:26:03,736 --> 00:26:06,071 Your readers are gonna suck their own dicks! 523 00:26:06,204 --> 00:26:09,241 - Shh! - Yeah, too much, okay. 524 00:26:21,988 --> 00:26:23,323 Heyo! 525 00:26:24,556 --> 00:26:27,427 You know, we can take my car if we need to. 526 00:26:27,559 --> 00:26:29,127 No, we're taking my car. Get in. 527 00:26:29,260 --> 00:26:31,329 Just, it looks like you just bought that on Craigslist. 528 00:26:31,463 --> 00:26:32,597 I did. 529 00:26:32,731 --> 00:26:35,067 Like a while ago, when Craigslist just first started. 530 00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:36,635 Yeah, this is Craig's car. 531 00:26:36,769 --> 00:26:38,336 - Oh. - Get the fuck in. 532 00:26:38,470 --> 00:26:40,139 This doesn't look like it's gonna make it, the trip, you know? 533 00:26:40,272 --> 00:26:41,706 Well, you better fucking hurry! 534 00:26:42,173 --> 00:26:43,175 Yeah, I better. 535 00:26:43,308 --> 00:26:45,509 Your chariot awaits, sir. 536 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:50,482 Hi, Mr. Brighton, this is Dr. Kaydan's office, 537 00:26:50,615 --> 00:26:52,483 calling to schedule your orchiectomy. 538 00:26:52,617 --> 00:26:54,153 We had a cancellation it looks like 539 00:26:54,287 --> 00:26:56,422 and I can actually get you on the schedule tomorrow. 540 00:26:56,555 --> 00:26:59,392 So please give us a call back as soon as you can. 541 00:26:59,525 --> 00:27:00,593 Thank you. 542 00:27:05,865 --> 00:27:09,067 So work was cool with you just taking off like this? 543 00:27:09,201 --> 00:27:11,570 I played the cancer card, again. 544 00:27:13,305 --> 00:27:14,774 It's my second time actually. 545 00:27:14,906 --> 00:27:18,176 I do it a third time, they'll definitely fire me. 546 00:27:18,310 --> 00:27:21,446 - Cause you don't have three balls. - Exactly, that's why. 547 00:27:22,213 --> 00:27:24,682 - Where are we going exactly? - Right. 548 00:27:25,284 --> 00:27:26,919 Consider this our Bible. 549 00:27:27,053 --> 00:27:29,354 We're gonna hit every X on that map. 550 00:27:29,488 --> 00:27:32,625 Except for the Atlanta area, that was a clusterfuck. 551 00:27:32,759 --> 00:27:34,093 - Literally. - Whoa! 552 00:27:34,226 --> 00:27:35,628 What? What's wrong with your face? 553 00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:37,129 - All of these Xs. - Yeah. 554 00:27:37,262 --> 00:27:38,696 You had sex in all these places? 555 00:27:38,830 --> 00:27:39,664 Bingo. 556 00:27:39,798 --> 00:27:40,967 I was expecting a lot, 557 00:27:41,099 --> 00:27:43,301 but like I wasn't expecting this many. 558 00:27:43,435 --> 00:27:45,403 All right, you're either judging me or underestimating me 559 00:27:45,538 --> 00:27:46,639 and either way I don't like it. 560 00:27:46,771 --> 00:27:49,274 I'm not judging you, it's just, I mean? 561 00:27:49,407 --> 00:27:51,509 College wasn't really my thing and so after high school, 562 00:27:51,644 --> 00:27:54,180 I just took off, moved around a lot. 563 00:27:54,313 --> 00:27:55,882 Your parents were cool with that? 564 00:27:56,015 --> 00:27:58,351 Just me and my mom, and she's got a... 565 00:27:59,551 --> 00:28:00,519 A thing. 566 00:28:00,653 --> 00:28:03,122 Took her a week to even notice I was gone. 567 00:28:07,291 --> 00:28:09,060 What's this little mark right here? 568 00:28:09,194 --> 00:28:10,394 Oh, that is our first stop. 569 00:28:10,528 --> 00:28:12,196 - It's at the airport? - Yeah. 570 00:28:12,330 --> 00:28:14,533 Grab us one of those back there, would ya? 571 00:28:20,939 --> 00:28:22,408 I... 572 00:28:22,540 --> 00:28:24,976 I mean, is this trip sponsored? 573 00:28:29,115 --> 00:28:30,982 So were you like picking up a boyfriend or? 574 00:28:31,115 --> 00:28:32,183 Never had one. 575 00:28:32,317 --> 00:28:33,384 So who was this guy? 576 00:28:33,519 --> 00:28:34,920 I don't know, some flight attendant. 577 00:28:35,054 --> 00:28:36,255 Had terrible breath, I remember that. 578 00:28:36,388 --> 00:28:38,056 So why'd you have sex with him? 579 00:28:38,190 --> 00:28:39,357 My flight was delayed. 580 00:28:39,490 --> 00:28:41,059 The... I'm sorry, what? 581 00:28:41,193 --> 00:28:43,828 No, random people don't just, you know, like... 582 00:28:43,962 --> 00:28:45,431 Men aren't that complicated. 583 00:28:45,564 --> 00:28:47,298 If you wanna get laid, you just walk up and you ask them. 584 00:28:47,432 --> 00:28:49,401 No, can't be that easy. 585 00:28:49,535 --> 00:28:51,370 - Just come on. - Okay. 586 00:28:53,739 --> 00:28:54,640 This feels so wrong. 587 00:28:54,772 --> 00:28:57,041 - Why are you whispering? - I don't know. 588 00:28:57,174 --> 00:28:58,743 All right, come on, let's do this. 589 00:28:58,876 --> 00:29:01,713 I was in one of these stalls, I think it was this one. 590 00:29:02,882 --> 00:29:04,116 Come on! 591 00:29:05,851 --> 00:29:07,653 Oh, wait, I have to pee. 592 00:29:25,304 --> 00:29:27,105 - Okay. - Ew, you just peed. 593 00:29:27,239 --> 00:29:28,740 Jesus Christ. 594 00:29:29,607 --> 00:29:30,643 Come on. 595 00:29:36,848 --> 00:29:37,950 Wait, what? 596 00:29:38,084 --> 00:29:39,151 You have two, I'm so confused. 597 00:29:39,284 --> 00:29:40,719 One of 'em's silicone. 598 00:29:40,853 --> 00:29:42,087 You have a nut implant? 599 00:29:42,221 --> 00:29:43,255 They do that? 600 00:29:43,387 --> 00:29:44,522 That's amazing. 601 00:29:44,656 --> 00:29:45,758 Well, thank you for your stellar review. 602 00:29:45,891 --> 00:29:47,026 Okay, come on. 603 00:29:47,159 --> 00:29:48,260 This is what happened. 604 00:29:48,394 --> 00:29:50,228 - He was sitting here. - Excuse me. 605 00:29:50,362 --> 00:29:51,864 Some sanitation, please. 606 00:29:53,432 --> 00:29:54,666 Here, princess. 607 00:29:56,469 --> 00:29:58,237 - There you go. - Thank you. 608 00:30:00,439 --> 00:30:02,208 You know, actually maybe we should just 609 00:30:02,340 --> 00:30:04,308 like share a meal first or something. 610 00:30:04,442 --> 00:30:07,480 The more you talk, the less I want to do this. 611 00:30:07,613 --> 00:30:09,515 Yes or no? 612 00:30:09,647 --> 00:30:11,183 Yes. 613 00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:22,862 Okay, carry me to the sink. 614 00:30:22,994 --> 00:30:24,295 - What? - That's what happened. 615 00:30:24,429 --> 00:30:25,964 We fucked here and then he carried me to the sink. 616 00:30:26,097 --> 00:30:28,799 - What if someone comes in? - Well, then make it quick. 617 00:30:28,933 --> 00:30:30,134 Come on! 618 00:30:30,268 --> 00:30:32,071 Must I do everything? 619 00:30:32,203 --> 00:30:33,871 Okay, go to the sink. 620 00:30:34,006 --> 00:30:35,173 Okay. 621 00:30:43,682 --> 00:30:44,915 Shh. 622 00:30:45,049 --> 00:30:46,152 Someone's coming. 623 00:30:46,285 --> 00:30:47,219 Me. 624 00:30:47,352 --> 00:30:49,287 Back to the stall, go! 625 00:30:49,421 --> 00:30:51,390 - Oh shit, oh shit. - Oh god! 626 00:30:51,890 --> 00:30:53,425 Oh shit! 627 00:30:53,558 --> 00:30:55,661 Oh shit! 628 00:31:08,840 --> 00:31:09,741 Finally. 629 00:31:10,776 --> 00:31:11,810 You see, Darla, 630 00:31:11,943 --> 00:31:14,012 this is where normal people usually have sex. 631 00:31:14,145 --> 00:31:17,015 You should look into it. 632 00:31:24,489 --> 00:31:26,726 Feels nice to get some comfies on. 633 00:31:28,094 --> 00:31:29,729 What, you're not a PJ person? 634 00:31:30,628 --> 00:31:32,763 I've got a snuggie if you want. 635 00:31:33,664 --> 00:31:35,600 There's literally nothing I want less. 636 00:31:39,571 --> 00:31:42,173 You know, there's enough space on this bed for both of us. 637 00:31:42,307 --> 00:31:43,608 Oh, I'm good. 638 00:31:43,741 --> 00:31:46,545 Oh, you're afraid I'm gonna put the moves on you? 639 00:31:47,346 --> 00:31:48,680 Night, Bailey. 640 00:33:01,987 --> 00:33:04,056 Whatcha working on there, stranger? 641 00:33:04,190 --> 00:33:05,324 Uh, nothing. 642 00:33:05,457 --> 00:33:07,259 Just journaling. 643 00:33:07,393 --> 00:33:08,794 Anything about me? 644 00:33:09,728 --> 00:33:11,029 Don't flatter yourself. 645 00:33:11,163 --> 00:33:12,530 Just checking. 646 00:33:12,663 --> 00:33:14,465 You still haven't told me what kind of writing you do. 647 00:33:14,599 --> 00:33:16,100 Yeah, well, I guess we still have a lot 648 00:33:16,233 --> 00:33:17,534 to learn about each other. 649 00:33:17,669 --> 00:33:19,137 Gonna get in the shower. 650 00:33:19,270 --> 00:33:21,639 We should probably pack up. 651 00:33:21,773 --> 00:33:24,408 Let's just say on this next stretch, 652 00:33:24,542 --> 00:33:26,544 I made a lot of friends. 653 00:33:31,950 --> 00:33:33,552 Wait, so we have to do it 654 00:33:33,684 --> 00:33:36,554 exactly the same way it was, otherwise it doesn't count? 655 00:33:36,688 --> 00:33:38,757 Whatever happens at X is what we need to do there. 656 00:33:38,891 --> 00:33:40,793 Penetration, vaginal, anal, just the tip, 657 00:33:40,925 --> 00:33:42,193 - hand jobs, blow jobs... - Okay. 658 00:33:42,327 --> 00:33:43,595 Around the back, going down. 659 00:33:43,729 --> 00:33:45,029 I'm very uncomfortable. 660 00:33:45,163 --> 00:33:46,731 I bet you slayed in college. 661 00:33:46,865 --> 00:33:49,101 - Before I got engaged? - Yeah. 662 00:33:49,233 --> 00:33:50,434 What's your number? 663 00:33:52,371 --> 00:33:53,538 How many people have you fucked? 664 00:33:53,672 --> 00:33:54,873 We're about to do a lot of fucking 665 00:33:55,006 --> 00:33:56,475 so I want to know what I'm working with here. 666 00:33:56,607 --> 00:33:58,309 - Uh, no. - How about we say it at the same time? 667 00:33:58,443 --> 00:33:59,478 This is childish. 668 00:33:59,611 --> 00:34:00,713 Okay, on the count of three, ready? 669 00:34:00,846 --> 00:34:02,114 - We don't need to do that. - One, two... 670 00:34:02,247 --> 00:34:03,582 - Not gonna give a number out to whoever. - Three. 671 00:34:03,715 --> 00:34:04,817 - It's two! - 169. 672 00:34:04,950 --> 00:34:06,884 169? Will you please look at the road? 673 00:34:07,019 --> 00:34:09,387 You've had sex with two people? 674 00:34:09,521 --> 00:34:11,223 Liz and I were high school sweethearts. 675 00:34:11,356 --> 00:34:13,025 We went to college together. 676 00:34:13,159 --> 00:34:15,693 Oh, my God. So at least there's another person, thank God. 677 00:34:15,827 --> 00:34:17,563 Who's the other person? 678 00:34:22,032 --> 00:34:23,000 Me? 679 00:34:23,134 --> 00:34:24,302 I'm number two? 680 00:34:24,436 --> 00:34:25,836 I said we were high school sweethearts. 681 00:34:25,971 --> 00:34:28,706 I've had sex before, just always with Liz. 682 00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:30,842 This is the most terrifying thing that you could ever tell me 683 00:34:30,976 --> 00:34:33,411 other than "Here, smell this rag" or "I think I love you." 684 00:34:33,545 --> 00:34:34,980 You're terrified? 685 00:34:35,114 --> 00:34:36,280 You're terrified? 686 00:34:36,414 --> 00:34:37,581 Have you seen this map? 687 00:34:37,715 --> 00:34:39,250 - All right. - All these Xs? 688 00:34:39,384 --> 00:34:42,688 I mean, there's like eight more Xs before we leave the state. 689 00:34:42,820 --> 00:34:43,954 We're already in this together, 690 00:34:44,088 --> 00:34:45,891 so I guess I'm just gonna deal with it. 691 00:34:46,025 --> 00:34:46,826 Nine! 692 00:35:02,474 --> 00:35:03,642 What are you doing? 693 00:35:03,775 --> 00:35:05,543 Don't smoke in the car with me. 694 00:35:05,677 --> 00:35:07,411 - What do mean? - I've got cancer! 695 00:35:55,460 --> 00:35:56,795 Got some more of these. 696 00:35:56,929 --> 00:36:00,131 I can't look at the map and drive at the same time. 697 00:36:00,264 --> 00:36:02,433 - Where are we right now? - Stop doodling. I need you to help me! 698 00:36:02,567 --> 00:36:03,902 - I am, okay. - I think we're lost. 699 00:36:04,036 --> 00:36:05,971 Get off on 59. I don't think we're lost. 700 00:36:08,873 --> 00:36:11,141 - Can I help you with anything? - No. No, no, no. 701 00:36:11,275 --> 00:36:13,644 Okay, I'm just checking. I'm here for you. 702 00:36:13,777 --> 00:36:16,881 Uh, it's just, must be the cold or something. 703 00:36:17,615 --> 00:36:18,918 It's not that cold. 704 00:36:20,284 --> 00:36:21,753 Too much? Okay, okay. 705 00:36:24,623 --> 00:36:26,590 Oh. 706 00:36:39,871 --> 00:36:41,506 You walk into any place with confidence, 707 00:36:41,639 --> 00:36:42,907 you can have sex in that place. 708 00:36:43,041 --> 00:36:44,443 Or you just wear a camo shirt 709 00:36:44,576 --> 00:36:45,976 because then they can't see you. 710 00:36:46,110 --> 00:36:47,711 Exactly, and they're like "Thank you for your service." 711 00:37:02,827 --> 00:37:04,863 To fucking halfway across America. 712 00:37:04,996 --> 00:37:06,131 Hmm. 713 00:37:07,498 --> 00:37:09,233 To be honest, I didn't think you were gonna cut it. 714 00:37:09,367 --> 00:37:12,737 Well, sex can be a compelling motivator, 715 00:37:12,871 --> 00:37:14,106 especially with you. 716 00:37:17,141 --> 00:37:18,909 Wait a second. What is this? 717 00:37:19,043 --> 00:37:20,844 - Can you give that back, please? - Is this me? 718 00:37:20,978 --> 00:37:22,914 It's nothing, it's just I got bored 719 00:37:23,047 --> 00:37:24,748 - when you were in the bathroom. - Shit, Bailey. 720 00:37:24,882 --> 00:37:28,819 I saw you sketching before but I didn't realize I was shagging Picasso. 721 00:37:28,952 --> 00:37:31,789 I'm more of a Shepard Fairey, Robin Velghe kind of guy. 722 00:37:31,923 --> 00:37:32,925 You're in deep with this shit. 723 00:37:33,057 --> 00:37:34,326 Did you go to art school? 724 00:37:34,460 --> 00:37:35,527 Yeah, right. 725 00:37:35,661 --> 00:37:37,429 Father would've disowned me. Yeah... 726 00:37:37,563 --> 00:37:38,963 If I hadn't followed Liz to Atlanta, 727 00:37:39,097 --> 00:37:41,066 I probably would've been running one of his gyms by now. 728 00:37:41,199 --> 00:37:43,467 And instead you're slumming it at someone else's. 729 00:37:43,601 --> 00:37:44,670 - Nice. - Yeah. 730 00:37:44,802 --> 00:37:46,103 I mean, what else am I gonna do? 731 00:37:46,237 --> 00:37:49,140 This, you should do this. It's sexy. 732 00:37:51,409 --> 00:37:53,277 Are you feeling any better? 733 00:37:53,411 --> 00:37:56,146 The therapy stuff, is any of this actually helping? 734 00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:57,715 Yeah. 735 00:37:57,849 --> 00:38:00,617 Yes, it is helping, thank you for asking. 736 00:38:00,751 --> 00:38:03,621 And you? You wanted to get laid. We've been doing a lot of that. 737 00:38:03,755 --> 00:38:05,824 Oh, careful what you wish for. 738 00:38:05,958 --> 00:38:08,593 Maybe your list can fit on a few of these now 739 00:38:08,726 --> 00:38:10,228 and maybe soon after your surgery, 740 00:38:10,362 --> 00:38:12,965 you'll be able to conquer a whole paper towel. 741 00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:18,903 I'm not sure I'm gonna go through with that. 742 00:38:19,637 --> 00:38:21,072 I didn't realize that was optional. 743 00:38:21,206 --> 00:38:23,375 Well, it's just kinda not loving the idea 744 00:38:23,507 --> 00:38:24,775 of becoming a eunuch. 745 00:38:24,909 --> 00:38:27,045 Maybe I just might take my chances. 746 00:38:27,177 --> 00:38:29,179 Yeah, I hear that works out really well for 747 00:38:29,313 --> 00:38:31,582 people who take their chances with life-threatening diseases. 748 00:38:31,715 --> 00:38:33,685 Hey, can we not talk about this? 749 00:38:35,454 --> 00:38:36,622 Yeah, sorry. 750 00:38:36,755 --> 00:38:38,289 I get it, you're anxious. 751 00:38:38,422 --> 00:38:40,491 Is that why you've been having issues lately, 752 00:38:40,626 --> 00:38:42,226 getting full mast? 753 00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:44,296 Oh, no. 754 00:38:44,429 --> 00:38:46,597 - Are you talking about the bus? - Talking about your penis. 755 00:38:46,731 --> 00:38:48,432 - Actually, that's very normal. - It's normal? 756 00:38:48,565 --> 00:38:50,734 - You know how long we've been going at it... - A doctor. 757 00:38:50,869 --> 00:38:53,371 - My equipment works fine, all right? - I know. 758 00:38:53,503 --> 00:38:54,572 You're smiling. 759 00:38:54,706 --> 00:38:56,141 Look, all right, I'll prove it, okay? 760 00:38:56,273 --> 00:38:57,342 Where's next? 761 00:38:57,474 --> 00:38:58,710 Oh, see, look, look. 762 00:38:58,844 --> 00:38:59,778 We skipped a spot. 763 00:38:59,911 --> 00:39:01,847 We'll just circle back 60 miles. 764 00:39:03,282 --> 00:39:05,784 - No, we don't need to go back. - No, no skipping. 765 00:39:05,916 --> 00:39:07,251 We'll just like turn around tomorrow morning. 766 00:39:07,385 --> 00:39:08,954 We have so many more places to go, 767 00:39:09,086 --> 00:39:12,157 so we should just get a move on and go to those places. 768 00:39:12,289 --> 00:39:13,958 Yeah, but we've hit every X before this one. 769 00:39:14,092 --> 00:39:15,626 Why all of a sudden are you so fine with missing one? 770 00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:16,895 Just because we're skipping a spot 771 00:39:17,028 --> 00:39:18,530 doesn't put the whole trip in jeopardy. 772 00:39:18,664 --> 00:39:20,398 Why are you so willing to skip steps? What about step eight? 773 00:39:20,530 --> 00:39:23,300 Step eight of 12. You can't just like skip steps. 774 00:39:23,434 --> 00:39:25,070 Otherwise you're just standing still. It's not an escalator 775 00:39:25,202 --> 00:39:26,838 that's gonna carry you up through the steps. 776 00:39:26,972 --> 00:39:29,074 And guess what? Even on an escalator, the steps come back around. 777 00:39:29,206 --> 00:39:31,942 - You can't just like skip them. - Fine, we will go. 778 00:39:32,077 --> 00:39:33,278 - Whatever. - All right. 779 00:39:33,411 --> 00:39:34,445 Oh, like right now? 780 00:39:40,585 --> 00:39:41,686 Generous tip. 781 00:39:41,818 --> 00:39:43,054 Thank you. 782 00:39:52,797 --> 00:39:54,800 Check the mailbox. 783 00:40:08,045 --> 00:40:09,914 I can't believe he still lives here. 784 00:40:13,217 --> 00:40:14,585 I'm gonna scope it out. 785 00:40:14,719 --> 00:40:15,820 Wait here. 786 00:40:15,954 --> 00:40:17,189 I don't care. 787 00:40:23,427 --> 00:40:24,496 Shh! 788 00:40:32,103 --> 00:40:33,337 Jesus. 789 00:40:41,679 --> 00:40:43,848 Why am I doing this? What am I doing? 790 00:40:43,981 --> 00:40:45,483 - Shut up. - Shh. You shut up. 791 00:40:45,617 --> 00:40:47,986 I can hear you. If I can hear you, everyone can hear you. 792 00:40:48,119 --> 00:40:50,188 No one's crazier than me. Why am I doing this? 793 00:40:50,320 --> 00:40:51,389 Shh, shh. 794 00:40:55,293 --> 00:40:56,327 Oh, my God. 795 00:41:17,282 --> 00:41:18,416 Coast is clear. 796 00:41:18,550 --> 00:41:21,353 I checked all the windows, nobody's home. 797 00:41:21,485 --> 00:41:22,954 Let's do this. 798 00:41:31,128 --> 00:41:33,130 So are we going in through the chimney or? 799 00:41:33,264 --> 00:41:35,266 I remember where the hide-a-key is. 800 00:41:42,706 --> 00:41:46,143 So moody, it's like a cave in here. 801 00:41:46,277 --> 00:41:47,911 Look at all these brochures. 802 00:41:48,045 --> 00:41:49,681 Look, they must be on vacation. 803 00:41:49,815 --> 00:41:51,483 Oh, Hawaii, nice. 804 00:41:51,615 --> 00:41:54,451 All right, so ready to go down by the door, 805 00:41:54,585 --> 00:41:56,654 out here and the bedroom knowing you? 806 00:41:59,423 --> 00:42:00,358 Kitchen. 807 00:42:00,492 --> 00:42:02,027 Kitchen, okay. 808 00:42:16,273 --> 00:42:19,844 Okay, I've made an assessment and knowing you, 809 00:42:19,978 --> 00:42:21,914 I think I hit the jackpot. 810 00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:24,182 Counter, right? 811 00:42:25,550 --> 00:42:26,451 I was there. 812 00:42:26,583 --> 00:42:27,518 So close. 813 00:42:27,652 --> 00:42:29,619 I should get points for trying at least. 814 00:42:29,753 --> 00:42:31,322 Just different counters. 815 00:42:34,925 --> 00:42:36,594 Are you okay? 816 00:42:40,831 --> 00:42:42,166 She was there. 817 00:42:42,733 --> 00:42:44,101 Who? 818 00:42:44,902 --> 00:42:45,871 The wife. 819 00:42:46,003 --> 00:42:47,538 The wife from the picture. 820 00:42:47,672 --> 00:42:50,175 She was standing there before she ran out. 821 00:42:56,914 --> 00:42:58,951 I did this to her. 822 00:43:01,485 --> 00:43:02,520 Yeah. 823 00:43:08,659 --> 00:43:10,061 Oh, my God. 824 00:43:10,762 --> 00:43:11,930 Hey. 825 00:43:12,063 --> 00:43:13,999 Don't touch me. 826 00:43:14,132 --> 00:43:16,168 I'm sorry, I just... 827 00:43:17,101 --> 00:43:18,903 I just don't know what's happening. 828 00:43:19,036 --> 00:43:20,304 Nothing's happening. 829 00:43:20,438 --> 00:43:22,173 Nothing's happening, I didn't even know this guy. 830 00:43:22,974 --> 00:43:24,476 You don't have to tell me if you don't... 831 00:43:24,608 --> 00:43:28,212 I'm not... I'll tell you. I don't care. 832 00:43:28,813 --> 00:43:31,182 I met him at a bar. 833 00:43:32,150 --> 00:43:34,318 He said his wife was out of town. 834 00:43:35,853 --> 00:43:37,521 And when she walked in... 835 00:43:39,123 --> 00:43:41,292 no one has ever looked at me like that. 836 00:43:42,393 --> 00:43:45,162 And I was just sitting there with my legs open, 837 00:43:45,295 --> 00:43:46,897 just staring at her. 838 00:43:48,199 --> 00:43:51,769 And I knew I had done something fucked up, but I didn't know what to do. 839 00:43:55,438 --> 00:43:58,242 And she left bawling in her car 840 00:43:59,010 --> 00:44:00,778 and he went out after her. 841 00:44:03,380 --> 00:44:05,549 And you wanna know the fucked up thing? 842 00:44:07,284 --> 00:44:10,121 The most fucked up part is that I remember thinking 843 00:44:12,856 --> 00:44:14,559 I didn't even get off. 844 00:44:18,228 --> 00:44:20,364 She didn't even make it a mile. 845 00:44:20,498 --> 00:44:24,101 She ran a red light, got hit by a truck. 846 00:44:25,235 --> 00:44:27,237 And when I passed in the cab, 847 00:44:27,371 --> 00:44:29,374 the ambulance was already there. 848 00:44:30,842 --> 00:44:33,711 And I just passed on by them. 849 00:44:36,813 --> 00:44:40,518 I heard that they were still together and that she was fine. 850 00:44:45,322 --> 00:44:46,356 I didn't know that... 851 00:44:46,490 --> 00:44:48,559 That she's in a wheelchair. 852 00:44:51,563 --> 00:44:55,700 - I'm... I'm so sorry. - Don't... apologize to me. 853 00:44:55,833 --> 00:44:57,367 You don't think I knew what I was doing? 854 00:44:57,501 --> 00:44:59,903 You don't think that I saw his fucking wedding ring? 855 00:45:00,038 --> 00:45:01,338 I knew what I was doing. 856 00:45:01,472 --> 00:45:03,040 You can't blame yourself. 857 00:45:03,173 --> 00:45:05,108 Of course I fucking can. 858 00:45:05,242 --> 00:45:07,144 I... This was just me getting laid. 859 00:45:07,277 --> 00:45:09,079 I destroyed these people's lives, 860 00:45:09,213 --> 00:45:11,315 I destroyed this family. 861 00:45:11,882 --> 00:45:13,116 Well, I mean, 862 00:45:13,251 --> 00:45:14,952 he shouldn't have been fucking around with you. 863 00:45:15,085 --> 00:45:18,556 If it wasn't for me, these kids would be able to have a mom who isn't... 864 00:45:20,791 --> 00:45:22,393 Look, yes. 865 00:45:22,927 --> 00:45:24,129 You fucked up, okay? 866 00:45:24,262 --> 00:45:28,300 But this, this isn't your fault. 867 00:45:30,034 --> 00:45:31,470 You don't know shit. 868 00:47:37,862 --> 00:47:39,364 Oh, you're alive. 869 00:47:46,871 --> 00:47:47,872 Where are we? 870 00:47:48,005 --> 00:47:50,774 This is Dallas. It's my parents' house. 871 00:47:51,742 --> 00:47:52,643 Welcome. 872 00:47:53,744 --> 00:47:56,280 - No. - It's part of the deal, remember? 873 00:47:57,081 --> 00:47:58,249 I thought you were joking. 874 00:47:58,382 --> 00:47:59,783 Nope. 875 00:47:59,916 --> 00:48:02,653 In fact, I kinda need you to pretend to be my girlfriend. 876 00:48:02,786 --> 00:48:04,587 That's weird. Yeah, no, I know that's weird. 877 00:48:04,722 --> 00:48:06,124 But my parents think I'm a mess right now, 878 00:48:06,257 --> 00:48:09,126 so I really could use your help getting them off my back, 879 00:48:09,260 --> 00:48:13,431 so if that's cool with you. If you're cool, I'm cool. 880 00:48:13,563 --> 00:48:15,500 Great. I'll see you in the house. 881 00:48:17,835 --> 00:48:20,804 I'm gonna drive away. I'm definitely driving away. 882 00:48:20,938 --> 00:48:23,575 I'm gonna drive away. I can just drive away. 883 00:48:24,509 --> 00:48:26,744 Definitely driving away. 884 00:48:33,184 --> 00:48:34,719 Dinner's delicious, Mom. 885 00:48:34,851 --> 00:48:35,952 Thank you, son. 886 00:48:36,086 --> 00:48:38,889 As always, looks and cooks. 887 00:48:39,023 --> 00:48:41,893 Have you ever met a woman that could whip up a spread like this? 888 00:48:42,025 --> 00:48:43,994 I was raised on microwave dinners and canned food, 889 00:48:44,128 --> 00:48:47,798 but, thank you, I've known a few attractive cooks in my day. 890 00:48:47,931 --> 00:48:50,533 Darla, is that your car parked in front of the house? 891 00:48:50,668 --> 00:48:53,037 Mm-hmm. I kidnapped your son for a tour of debauchery. 892 00:48:53,170 --> 00:48:54,905 Therapy. It's a therapy tour. 893 00:48:55,039 --> 00:48:58,376 That's actually how we met, it's a cancer thing. 894 00:48:58,510 --> 00:49:00,778 Oh dear. You're a patient too? 895 00:49:04,282 --> 00:49:06,951 Yes. It's my breasts, they're toast. 896 00:49:07,083 --> 00:49:08,619 As fake as they come. 897 00:49:09,786 --> 00:49:10,753 Oh. 898 00:49:10,887 --> 00:49:13,356 Oh, see, I can spill mashed potatoes on 'em 899 00:49:13,490 --> 00:49:14,791 and can't feel a thing. 900 00:49:14,925 --> 00:49:17,361 Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Can't feel a thing. 901 00:49:17,494 --> 00:49:19,864 I've read about this, chemo brain? 902 00:49:19,996 --> 00:49:23,000 - Oh, no, Darla's very healthy. - Oh. 903 00:49:23,134 --> 00:49:24,936 We both are. Never better. 904 00:49:25,068 --> 00:49:26,836 What did the doctor say? 905 00:49:26,971 --> 00:49:30,208 Uh, Yeah, I just had a checkup actually. 906 00:49:30,340 --> 00:49:31,442 All clear. 907 00:49:31,576 --> 00:49:33,043 Yeah, work's great too. 908 00:49:33,177 --> 00:49:36,681 It's like a lot of new clients, gym's very busy. 909 00:49:36,813 --> 00:49:39,616 Well, your father's opening was a huge success. 910 00:49:39,751 --> 00:49:41,852 You know, we've been thinking about expanding. 911 00:49:41,985 --> 00:49:42,920 To Georgia. 912 00:49:43,054 --> 00:49:44,655 Maybe we can make this a family business. 913 00:49:44,789 --> 00:49:46,290 Be so good for you, son, 914 00:49:46,423 --> 00:49:48,025 when you're ready to start a family? 915 00:49:48,159 --> 00:49:50,827 I think he could really make some money with those drawing skills. 916 00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:53,096 I think he could be the next Shepherd's Pie. 917 00:49:53,230 --> 00:49:54,164 - Fairey. - Fairey. 918 00:49:54,297 --> 00:49:55,566 - Shepard Fairey. - Whatever. 919 00:49:55,699 --> 00:49:57,167 Bailey understands that drawing is not a career, 920 00:49:57,300 --> 00:49:58,603 it's a hobby. 921 00:49:58,735 --> 00:50:00,838 Well, you could say the same thing about fitness. 922 00:50:03,940 --> 00:50:05,742 And what exactly do you do, Darla? 923 00:50:05,876 --> 00:50:07,344 Mm? Oh, me. 924 00:50:07,478 --> 00:50:08,847 I'm a writer. 925 00:50:11,583 --> 00:50:13,483 For a magazine, a very famous magazine. 926 00:50:13,617 --> 00:50:14,784 It's very famous. 927 00:50:14,918 --> 00:50:17,420 And we hire artists like him all the time. 928 00:50:17,554 --> 00:50:19,923 - Huh. - Which one? 929 00:50:20,056 --> 00:50:21,625 - Which one? - Mm-hmm. 930 00:50:21,760 --> 00:50:22,793 Um... 931 00:50:23,894 --> 00:50:26,264 What a question. I don't think you've heard of it probably. 932 00:50:26,396 --> 00:50:27,597 Oh, I'm sure we have. 933 00:50:27,731 --> 00:50:29,066 We read all the big ones, 934 00:50:29,199 --> 00:50:31,534 what, Men's Fitness, Men's Health, Men's Journal. 935 00:50:31,668 --> 00:50:33,036 Seems to be a theme going on. 936 00:50:33,170 --> 00:50:35,706 My husband likes to stay current with the industry. 937 00:50:35,840 --> 00:50:41,746 Well, my industry is more of like a women also exist... thing. 938 00:50:45,782 --> 00:50:47,250 How long have you two been dating? 939 00:50:47,385 --> 00:50:48,419 - Only a few weeks. - Months. 940 00:50:48,552 --> 00:50:49,586 - Months! - Few months. 941 00:50:49,721 --> 00:50:51,356 Months, weeks, hard to tell. 942 00:50:51,489 --> 00:50:53,190 'Cause we're having so much fun. 943 00:50:53,324 --> 00:50:57,762 Well, Bailey's mother and I dated for 10 years before we married. 944 00:50:57,896 --> 00:50:59,730 - We were high school sweethearts. - Mm-hmm. 945 00:50:59,864 --> 00:51:03,567 And speaking of, Liz flew into town. 946 00:51:03,701 --> 00:51:05,402 I'm sure she's gonna be very happy to see you. 947 00:51:05,536 --> 00:51:07,605 - Liz is here. - Mm-hmm. 948 00:51:07,737 --> 00:51:09,506 - Hm. - Oh, she is? 949 00:51:09,639 --> 00:51:13,409 Bailey, I told you last week when I texted you those messages that you... 950 00:51:15,012 --> 00:51:18,949 Oh, I think we're just so tired from the drive here. 951 00:51:19,083 --> 00:51:20,785 - Wow. - I think I'm just gonna hit the hay. 952 00:51:20,918 --> 00:51:23,054 So what time should we be ready for the party tomorrow? 953 00:51:23,186 --> 00:51:25,922 I thought this would be more of a family thing. 954 00:51:26,056 --> 00:51:27,523 No. Liz. 955 00:51:27,657 --> 00:51:30,527 D-Darla's coming, right? 956 00:51:31,329 --> 00:51:33,331 Yeah, I'm coming. 957 00:51:33,465 --> 00:51:36,634 I can't wait to talk more about my cancer 958 00:51:36,766 --> 00:51:40,771 and our... loving relationship. 959 00:51:41,405 --> 00:51:43,041 Son, please make sure 960 00:51:43,173 --> 00:51:46,510 that you show Darla the guest bedroom. 961 00:51:48,177 --> 00:51:49,146 Yes, Mom. 962 00:52:04,128 --> 00:52:05,028 Hey. 963 00:52:07,197 --> 00:52:08,332 - Hey. - Oh, wow. 964 00:52:08,465 --> 00:52:10,635 Holy shit. 965 00:52:10,768 --> 00:52:13,304 You didn't tell me you grew up in "The Wonder Years." 966 00:52:13,436 --> 00:52:15,572 I'm sorry about them. 967 00:52:17,074 --> 00:52:20,544 Yeah. I mean, one dinner with your parents 968 00:52:20,677 --> 00:52:22,612 and I'm surprised you're not a full serial killer. 969 00:52:22,746 --> 00:52:25,682 You did go a bit pathological though. 970 00:52:26,583 --> 00:52:28,652 It's just so frustrating. 971 00:52:28,786 --> 00:52:32,789 I just wanted to get my mind off of this, 972 00:52:32,923 --> 00:52:34,958 but like what if it's worse? 973 00:52:35,092 --> 00:52:37,161 You know, what if it's spreading? 974 00:52:46,302 --> 00:52:47,638 You're gonna be fine. 975 00:52:48,739 --> 00:52:50,007 You don't know that. 976 00:52:50,141 --> 00:52:52,076 It's not like I'm ever gonna have a family. 977 00:52:52,210 --> 00:52:55,612 And even if I did, I couldn't get up without a testosterone injection. 978 00:52:55,746 --> 00:52:57,782 This... This is it for me. 979 00:52:57,916 --> 00:53:00,918 Jesus, don't you think you're being just a little dramatic? 980 00:53:01,050 --> 00:53:05,188 Okay, let's say that I managed to get a second date, huh? 981 00:53:05,322 --> 00:53:08,125 What happens when my fake balls come out? 982 00:53:08,257 --> 00:53:09,592 Who's gonna want that? 983 00:53:09,726 --> 00:53:13,663 First off, balls stay in the pants until they're invited out. 984 00:53:13,797 --> 00:53:16,634 - Agreed. - Second, chicks don't care about balls. 985 00:53:16,768 --> 00:53:18,302 And also, that is such a double standard. 986 00:53:18,436 --> 00:53:21,405 Since when has a guy ever turned down a girl with fake tits? 987 00:53:21,539 --> 00:53:23,674 Never. Literally, it's never happened. 988 00:53:23,807 --> 00:53:26,777 I guess you'd know, right, breast cancer? 989 00:53:26,911 --> 00:53:29,146 Yes. Yeah, no thanks to you. 990 00:53:29,280 --> 00:53:31,615 Maybe you should follow suit, get some upgrades. 991 00:53:31,748 --> 00:53:33,850 Old grapefruits swinging from your branch. 992 00:53:33,985 --> 00:53:36,421 Maybe it'll be your foray into porno stardom. 993 00:53:36,554 --> 00:53:37,922 - Mm-hmm. - Uh-huh. 994 00:53:38,056 --> 00:53:41,224 - What's your porn star name? - I... W-What? 995 00:53:41,358 --> 00:53:42,360 Your porn star name. 996 00:53:42,492 --> 00:53:43,527 It's the name of your first pet 997 00:53:43,661 --> 00:53:45,262 and the street you grew up on. 998 00:53:46,563 --> 00:53:49,300 - Oh. - Oh, it's good, what is it? 999 00:53:49,432 --> 00:53:50,400 It is. 1000 00:53:50,534 --> 00:53:51,367 What is it? 1001 00:53:51,501 --> 00:53:52,804 Uh... 1002 00:53:54,905 --> 00:53:57,274 It's Waggy Beansack. 1003 00:53:58,041 --> 00:54:00,378 - Waggy Beansack? - This is Beansack. 1004 00:54:00,510 --> 00:54:02,646 I've been hanging out on Beansack? 1005 00:54:02,780 --> 00:54:05,215 And Waggy was my dog, rest in peace. 1006 00:54:05,349 --> 00:54:06,884 Oh, my God. 1007 00:54:07,016 --> 00:54:08,518 All right, your turn. 1008 00:54:08,652 --> 00:54:09,719 We're in your hometown. 1009 00:54:09,853 --> 00:54:11,087 Let's cross off some of your spots. 1010 00:54:11,222 --> 00:54:13,990 - Oh, no, no, no, no. - If it didn't happen here, 1011 00:54:14,125 --> 00:54:15,992 then where did the deflowering take place? 1012 00:54:16,126 --> 00:54:19,028 If you could please stop referring to my virginity as a flower? 1013 00:54:19,163 --> 00:54:20,297 Sure. 1014 00:54:20,431 --> 00:54:22,199 All right, where did you get drunk for the first time 1015 00:54:22,331 --> 00:54:25,135 or buy your first pack of cigarettes or lit something on fire? 1016 00:54:25,268 --> 00:54:26,971 We are so different. 1017 00:54:27,105 --> 00:54:28,672 Whatever we do, just get me out of here 1018 00:54:28,806 --> 00:54:31,175 because your parents scare the shit out of me. 1019 00:54:33,077 --> 00:54:34,678 It's right here on the right. 1020 00:54:34,811 --> 00:54:35,913 Where are we going? 1021 00:54:36,047 --> 00:54:37,347 Yeah, just right here. 1022 00:54:37,481 --> 00:54:38,816 Oh, okay. 1023 00:54:41,152 --> 00:54:43,253 Just right here. You can stop. 1024 00:54:43,387 --> 00:54:44,756 I got it. 1025 00:54:45,688 --> 00:54:47,791 Yep, here it is. 1026 00:54:47,925 --> 00:54:50,427 This is where the magic happened. 1027 00:54:50,561 --> 00:54:51,961 This cow pasture? 1028 00:54:52,096 --> 00:54:54,565 No, this is Liz's house. 1029 00:54:54,697 --> 00:54:56,599 Her parents still live here actually. 1030 00:54:56,733 --> 00:54:59,336 Oh, great. Let's go. 1031 00:54:59,469 --> 00:55:01,203 What? No. 1032 00:55:01,338 --> 00:55:03,106 No, no! 1033 00:55:03,706 --> 00:55:07,344 What? What are you... Hey! 1034 00:55:26,931 --> 00:55:28,398 Oh, my God. I know. 1035 00:55:28,532 --> 00:55:29,800 Jesus Christ. 1036 00:55:31,268 --> 00:55:33,436 - Is that her? - Yeah, what are you doing? 1037 00:55:33,570 --> 00:55:34,971 I showed you my dirty laundry. 1038 00:55:35,105 --> 00:55:36,940 I want to see where your cherry got popped. 1039 00:55:37,074 --> 00:55:38,842 Well, here it is. Can we go now? 1040 00:55:39,275 --> 00:55:41,144 No. Okay. 1041 00:55:43,679 --> 00:55:45,348 - Now's our chance. - For what? 1042 00:55:45,481 --> 00:55:46,583 Come on. 1043 00:55:46,717 --> 00:55:47,918 What are you doing? 1044 00:55:48,052 --> 00:55:50,454 - Going inside. - Don't do it. 1045 00:55:50,588 --> 00:55:51,823 Don't! 1046 00:55:52,722 --> 00:55:55,960 Stop it, stop it. Stop that. 1047 00:55:59,429 --> 00:56:01,097 Absolutely not. 1048 00:56:01,231 --> 00:56:04,102 Oh. Liz's parents could be inside. 1049 00:56:04,235 --> 00:56:05,169 Yeah, I know. 1050 00:56:05,302 --> 00:56:06,836 Great, I'll just ring the doorbell 1051 00:56:06,971 --> 00:56:10,039 and it'll be like "Oh, baby, what are you doing here 1052 00:56:10,172 --> 00:56:12,108 in the middle of the night with this gorgeous creature?" 1053 00:56:12,242 --> 00:56:13,376 Is she a Dickens character? 1054 00:56:13,510 --> 00:56:15,213 And you'll be like, "Oh, hey, Liz's mom. 1055 00:56:15,346 --> 00:56:16,880 - It's just me, Bailey." - That's supposed to be me? 1056 00:56:17,014 --> 00:56:19,817 "And I'm here to fuck this amazing creature 1057 00:56:19,949 --> 00:56:21,884 - in your daughter's bed." - All right, let's just... 1058 00:56:22,018 --> 00:56:23,219 Just a little bit of this. 1059 00:56:23,353 --> 00:56:25,021 - Stop doing this. - A little bit of this. 1060 00:56:25,155 --> 00:56:27,258 - Okay, stop doing this. - Okay. 1061 00:56:27,391 --> 00:56:28,791 All right, fine, we'll go inside 1062 00:56:28,925 --> 00:56:31,894 and just promise me you'll be quiet. 1063 00:56:32,028 --> 00:56:34,697 - Yeah, like a little baby mouse. - Okay. 1064 00:56:34,831 --> 00:56:36,500 Very small. 1065 00:56:37,001 --> 00:56:38,302 It's so easy. 1066 00:56:38,434 --> 00:56:39,503 It's too easy. 1067 00:56:39,635 --> 00:56:41,438 No alarm system. 1068 00:56:54,050 --> 00:56:55,552 Why are you so low to the ground? 1069 00:56:59,356 --> 00:57:01,592 Right here on the left, that's where we did it. 1070 00:57:01,724 --> 00:57:02,993 Oh, okay. 1071 00:57:05,829 --> 00:57:08,298 - Oh, my God. - Shh, shh, shh. 1072 00:57:08,431 --> 00:57:09,899 Holy shit! 1073 00:57:10,034 --> 00:57:13,304 Did you lose your virginity to someone's nana? 1074 00:57:13,436 --> 00:57:15,605 I remember it as much less creepy. 1075 00:57:15,739 --> 00:57:17,775 I can't see how that's possible. 1076 00:57:17,907 --> 00:57:19,275 What is that smell? 1077 00:57:19,409 --> 00:57:21,144 What, have you never smelled potpourri before? 1078 00:57:21,278 --> 00:57:23,847 Only in regular doses. I didn't try to kill anyone with it. 1079 00:57:23,981 --> 00:57:25,183 Ha ha ha. 1080 00:57:26,384 --> 00:57:27,583 - Ah! - Shh. 1081 00:57:27,717 --> 00:57:29,420 I thought that was going to be a lot softer than it was. 1082 00:57:29,554 --> 00:57:31,588 Liz's parents are, like, right next door. 1083 00:57:33,389 --> 00:57:35,759 - Who's this? - That's Mr. Wizzlebiz. 1084 00:57:35,893 --> 00:57:37,260 Leave it alone. 1085 00:57:37,394 --> 00:57:38,429 Sorry. 1086 00:57:40,264 --> 00:57:43,334 - Is this how you did it? - Wait, wait. 1087 00:57:43,467 --> 00:57:44,768 - What? - Just stop. 1088 00:57:44,902 --> 00:57:46,003 What? 1089 00:57:46,135 --> 00:57:48,572 If we're gonna recreate my experience, 1090 00:57:48,704 --> 00:57:50,273 we're gonna do it my way, okay? 1091 00:57:50,974 --> 00:57:52,409 Okay. 1092 00:57:57,079 --> 00:57:59,215 I'll just lay here like Liz and do nothing. 1093 00:57:59,349 --> 00:58:01,117 Liz didn't just do nothing, okay? 1094 00:58:01,251 --> 00:58:03,019 Oh, yeah, I'm sure she was an animal in bed. 1095 00:58:03,152 --> 00:58:06,422 Speaking of which, there are a lot of animals staring at me right now. 1096 00:58:06,556 --> 00:58:09,359 - Just ignore the wildlife, Liz. - All right, fine. 1097 00:58:14,797 --> 00:58:17,033 - Darla. - I'm sorry. 1098 00:58:17,168 --> 00:58:18,536 You're so serious about this. 1099 00:58:18,668 --> 00:58:19,969 I was serious then. 1100 00:58:20,103 --> 00:58:22,706 I'm sorry, I'm serious. I'm taking this seriously. 1101 00:58:22,838 --> 00:58:24,474 Trust me, okay? 1102 00:58:35,585 --> 00:58:38,321 You suck at this. Let's do your shirt. 1103 00:59:03,012 --> 00:59:04,347 Is this okay? 1104 01:00:02,539 --> 01:00:03,741 Let's go. 1105 01:00:11,548 --> 01:00:12,382 Ow! 1106 01:00:12,516 --> 01:00:13,550 Sorry. 1107 01:00:16,018 --> 01:00:17,420 Go, go, go, go. 1108 01:01:09,572 --> 01:01:11,408 You know what I was thinking? 1109 01:01:13,177 --> 01:01:16,614 Maybe we don't have to go to this thing. 1110 01:01:18,514 --> 01:01:19,949 No. 1111 01:01:20,083 --> 01:01:21,550 I mean, you said you wanted to go 1112 01:01:21,684 --> 01:01:23,887 and it's gonna be weird, so fuck it. 1113 01:01:24,021 --> 01:01:24,955 Let's have a good time. 1114 01:01:25,088 --> 01:01:26,389 Right, but let me warn you, 1115 01:01:26,523 --> 01:01:28,858 this is a little bit of a boring crowd, you know? 1116 01:01:28,992 --> 01:01:30,327 I figured. 1117 01:01:30,460 --> 01:01:32,161 What do you want me to wear to this little shindig? 1118 01:01:32,295 --> 01:01:34,463 I was gonna ask you to wear something a little bit more conservative. 1119 01:01:34,597 --> 01:01:37,166 - Gross. - Yeah, but fuck it, wear what you wanna wear, you know? 1120 01:01:37,300 --> 01:01:38,902 Just go balls-out. 1121 01:01:39,036 --> 01:01:40,237 - Good pun. - Yeah. Ooh. 1122 01:01:40,369 --> 01:01:42,239 - Hitting the shower. - Okay. 1123 01:02:06,762 --> 01:02:09,398 - So is this a costume party now? - What? 1124 01:02:09,532 --> 01:02:12,902 Seriously, why did you dress me up like a pastor's daughter? 1125 01:02:13,036 --> 01:02:14,070 You look fine. 1126 01:02:14,204 --> 01:02:16,373 I look like your English professor. 1127 01:02:17,440 --> 01:02:19,342 Don't be silly, come on. 1128 01:02:20,409 --> 01:02:22,178 Why is this house so big? 1129 01:02:22,311 --> 01:02:24,014 Because people live in it. 1130 01:02:29,652 --> 01:02:31,487 Hello, darling. 1131 01:02:31,621 --> 01:02:34,389 How are you? We brought a gift. 1132 01:02:34,523 --> 01:02:35,925 - Thank you. - Congratulations. 1133 01:02:36,059 --> 01:02:38,094 Congratulations. Oh, of course. 1134 01:02:38,829 --> 01:02:41,832 Hi. Congratulations, nice to see you. 1135 01:02:41,965 --> 01:02:43,367 Thank you. 1136 01:02:45,001 --> 01:02:47,637 So this is what it looks like in broad daylight. 1137 01:02:55,646 --> 01:02:57,581 - Are you okay? - I'm fine. 1138 01:03:00,583 --> 01:03:01,884 Here. 1139 01:03:02,018 --> 01:03:03,586 Thanks. 1140 01:03:03,719 --> 01:03:06,088 She's not gonna jump out of the fucking cake. 1141 01:03:06,222 --> 01:03:07,657 - Who? - Who? 1142 01:03:07,791 --> 01:03:09,026 Really subtle. 1143 01:03:09,159 --> 01:03:11,394 You're giving me whiplash. 1144 01:03:13,295 --> 01:03:15,398 I thought we were gonna have fun. 1145 01:03:17,067 --> 01:03:18,534 What is going on with you? 1146 01:03:18,668 --> 01:03:21,038 What's going on with you, hm? 1147 01:03:21,170 --> 01:03:22,605 How's therapy lately? 1148 01:03:23,340 --> 01:03:25,909 Sure are journaling a lot recently. 1149 01:03:26,041 --> 01:03:27,277 It's fine. 1150 01:03:27,710 --> 01:03:28,644 It's fine. 1151 01:03:29,880 --> 01:03:32,816 Did your mom pick out your outfit? 1152 01:03:34,985 --> 01:03:36,186 What the fuck are you doing? 1153 01:03:36,320 --> 01:03:37,653 Bailey. 1154 01:03:38,422 --> 01:03:40,389 Hey, Liz. Didn't even see you there. 1155 01:03:40,523 --> 01:03:43,425 Yeah, I was surprised to hear you're back in town. 1156 01:03:43,559 --> 01:03:46,262 Yeah, just passing through. 1157 01:03:46,829 --> 01:03:47,864 From Atlanta? 1158 01:03:47,998 --> 01:03:51,001 Yeah, just you know, had to get some time away 1159 01:03:51,134 --> 01:03:52,568 to reassess things. 1160 01:03:52,702 --> 01:03:55,771 Some time apart kinda helped me to put things 1161 01:03:55,905 --> 01:03:57,140 back into perspective. 1162 01:03:57,273 --> 01:03:59,108 Wow, you've done all this growth in, 1163 01:03:59,242 --> 01:04:00,811 like, the past two weeks? 1164 01:04:00,945 --> 01:04:02,979 Yeah. Amazing, isn't it? 1165 01:04:03,780 --> 01:04:05,949 How about you? What've you been up to? 1166 01:04:06,083 --> 01:04:07,483 Oh, you know, the usual. 1167 01:04:07,617 --> 01:04:10,653 Just trying to temper my parents' absurd expectations. 1168 01:04:10,788 --> 01:04:11,755 Tell me about it. 1169 01:04:11,889 --> 01:04:15,057 And I think we got robbed last night. 1170 01:04:15,190 --> 01:04:16,326 - What? - Yeah. 1171 01:04:16,460 --> 01:04:18,929 I'm not sure because nothing was stolen, 1172 01:04:19,061 --> 01:04:21,597 but clearly someone had, like, snooped in my room. 1173 01:04:21,731 --> 01:04:23,534 I don't know what kind of weirdo would do that. 1174 01:04:23,666 --> 01:04:25,469 Hi, I'm Darla, by the way. 1175 01:04:25,601 --> 01:04:27,737 - Oh, yes, this is Darla... - Yeah. 1176 01:04:27,871 --> 01:04:29,072 ...my girlfriend. 1177 01:04:29,204 --> 01:04:31,807 Yeah, I heard you guys had been dating for a few months. 1178 01:04:31,942 --> 01:04:34,210 I don't know how I missed that. 1179 01:04:34,344 --> 01:04:37,548 You look so much prettier in person. 1180 01:04:39,849 --> 01:04:40,884 I'm sorry, what? 1181 01:04:41,018 --> 01:04:42,885 Well, I've seen Bailey's posts about you guys. 1182 01:04:43,018 --> 01:04:45,654 - Posts, what posts? - Isn't she funny? 1183 01:04:45,788 --> 01:04:49,192 Well, I'm so happy for you, Bails. 1184 01:04:49,326 --> 01:04:50,760 Seems like you're doing really well. 1185 01:04:50,893 --> 01:04:53,195 Well, you know, I guess I have you to thank. 1186 01:04:53,329 --> 01:04:55,565 I mean, if we didn't have that talk, 1187 01:04:55,697 --> 01:04:58,100 who knows, maybe I never would have met Darla here. 1188 01:04:58,235 --> 01:05:00,037 - Mm. - Ow. 1189 01:05:00,170 --> 01:05:01,371 - You okay, babe? - Yeah, babe. 1190 01:05:01,505 --> 01:05:03,206 You're squeezing me like a fucking bird. 1191 01:05:03,340 --> 01:05:06,110 Sorry. Just can't seem to keep my hands off this one when she's around. 1192 01:05:06,242 --> 01:05:08,344 Mm! Oh, wow. Can we talk for a second? 1193 01:05:08,478 --> 01:05:09,346 - Mm-hmm. - Be right back. 1194 01:05:09,480 --> 01:05:10,581 Okay. 1195 01:05:14,851 --> 01:05:16,585 - What the fuck are you doing? - What do you mean? 1196 01:05:16,719 --> 01:05:18,588 Are you seriously posting pictures of us to make her jealous? 1197 01:05:18,722 --> 01:05:20,157 Hey, Bailey, is everything okay? 1198 01:05:20,289 --> 01:05:21,423 Take a seat, Jumpsuit. 1199 01:05:21,556 --> 01:05:23,292 Do not be rude to her. 1200 01:05:23,425 --> 01:05:24,728 You don't talk to her like that. 1201 01:05:24,860 --> 01:05:27,297 - Seriously? - Keep your voice down. 1202 01:05:27,996 --> 01:05:29,500 Who are you right now? 1203 01:05:30,333 --> 01:05:31,934 I read your blog. 1204 01:05:33,369 --> 01:05:34,636 - What blog? - What blog? 1205 01:05:34,771 --> 01:05:36,306 It's on the fucking Internet. 1206 01:05:36,438 --> 01:05:38,707 Did you really think I wasn't gonna find it? 1207 01:05:38,842 --> 01:05:40,744 Well, you know what, I'm glad I did. 1208 01:05:40,878 --> 01:05:42,913 Otherwise I never would've known that this whole thing's a fucking lie. 1209 01:05:43,045 --> 01:05:45,014 You're just using me to be the john in your sex column. 1210 01:05:45,148 --> 01:05:47,884 My favorite piece, I think, was the chef's one. 1211 01:05:48,018 --> 01:05:49,519 Yeah, real clever title. 1212 01:05:49,652 --> 01:05:51,353 Uh, "Eating Out?" 1213 01:05:51,487 --> 01:05:52,856 Ew... scholarly. 1214 01:05:52,989 --> 01:05:55,159 So what? I write about sex. I told you I was a writer. 1215 01:05:55,291 --> 01:05:59,195 Yeah, but I thought you meant like novels and stuff, like not like smut. 1216 01:05:59,329 --> 01:06:00,396 You could have googled me, that's on you. 1217 01:06:00,530 --> 01:06:02,766 You know, my cancer is private. 1218 01:06:02,898 --> 01:06:05,868 - As is my sex life. - What sex life? 1219 01:06:06,001 --> 01:06:07,371 I am your sex life, 1220 01:06:07,503 --> 01:06:09,905 which obviously you were just using to fix your broken libido. 1221 01:06:10,039 --> 01:06:11,674 You didn't make it difficult on me, did you? 1222 01:06:11,807 --> 01:06:13,744 Which hasn't been a problem for you up until now, has it? 1223 01:06:13,876 --> 01:06:16,447 That was before I knew I was dealing with a sl... 1224 01:06:19,717 --> 01:06:21,018 What? 1225 01:06:22,152 --> 01:06:23,787 Go ahead and say it. 1226 01:06:25,121 --> 01:06:26,456 Call me a slut. 1227 01:06:29,393 --> 01:06:30,894 I didn't have to. 1228 01:06:34,364 --> 01:06:35,833 Bailey? 1229 01:06:39,668 --> 01:06:42,105 You gonna tell them or should I? 1230 01:06:45,340 --> 01:06:47,043 Wow. 1231 01:06:47,177 --> 01:06:51,047 You're not gonna tell them. You're pathetic. 1232 01:06:51,181 --> 01:06:53,682 You're fucking miserable, you have a miserable job, 1233 01:06:53,817 --> 01:06:55,217 your life is going nowhere, 1234 01:06:55,351 --> 01:06:57,521 and you're chasing some Southern Living fantasy and why? 1235 01:06:57,653 --> 01:06:59,222 She doesn't even want you 1236 01:06:59,355 --> 01:07:01,791 because she already knows what's so obvious to the both of us 1237 01:07:01,925 --> 01:07:05,496 that no matter what is in your pants, you'll never be a real man. 1238 01:07:08,965 --> 01:07:11,501 At least I know what it feels like to be loved. 1239 01:07:13,202 --> 01:07:14,471 Got it. 1240 01:07:16,206 --> 01:07:19,410 Enjoy the rest of your party with your real girlfriend. 1241 01:07:50,574 --> 01:07:51,974 Come on! 1242 01:08:32,981 --> 01:08:34,384 Whatever you're looking for in there, 1243 01:08:34,516 --> 01:08:38,154 it's probably easier to find it if the glass were empty. 1244 01:09:11,186 --> 01:09:12,622 Something wrong? 1245 01:09:15,557 --> 01:09:16,993 Get out. 1246 01:09:19,328 --> 01:09:20,663 I said get out! 1247 01:09:20,796 --> 01:09:22,164 - Jesus. - Get the fuck out! 1248 01:09:22,298 --> 01:09:23,833 Jesus. 1249 01:10:04,340 --> 01:10:05,576 Hey. 1250 01:10:06,475 --> 01:10:07,643 Mind if I join you? 1251 01:10:08,944 --> 01:10:12,514 Well, I can't promise I'm not gonna do something else wildly embarrassing. 1252 01:10:12,649 --> 01:10:15,185 Oh, I was hoping you would. 1253 01:10:17,886 --> 01:10:20,090 Hungry? Your mom said you haven't eaten yet. 1254 01:10:20,222 --> 01:10:22,525 Oh, so you came here to feed me? 1255 01:10:22,658 --> 01:10:24,826 I just wanted to check in on you. 1256 01:10:24,961 --> 01:10:26,997 Am I still allowed to do that? 1257 01:10:34,270 --> 01:10:37,740 So, um... what was your deal with her anyway? 1258 01:10:37,873 --> 01:10:40,810 Were you guys like actually dating or? 1259 01:10:40,944 --> 01:10:44,080 I kinda started to think that we... No. 1260 01:10:44,213 --> 01:10:47,083 Uh, it was stupid. 1261 01:10:50,019 --> 01:10:52,121 I mean, I understand. 1262 01:10:52,255 --> 01:10:57,292 It makes sense that you wanna have fun with someone who isn't me. 1263 01:10:57,426 --> 01:11:00,998 I guess I just didn't expect you to go all the way off the deep end. 1264 01:11:02,966 --> 01:11:05,635 Oh, come on. Things aren't that bad. 1265 01:11:05,769 --> 01:11:08,503 I mean, yes, they didn't turn out as expected, 1266 01:11:08,637 --> 01:11:11,375 but... we're still here. 1267 01:11:11,507 --> 01:11:16,880 If teenage me knew that 30 me would still be sitting at this desk, 1268 01:11:17,980 --> 01:11:20,215 you know, just hiding out in this room, 1269 01:11:21,184 --> 01:11:24,588 just as unsure about what I want to do with my life 1270 01:11:24,720 --> 01:11:26,422 as like I was ever. 1271 01:11:27,756 --> 01:11:29,324 I don't know. 1272 01:11:29,458 --> 01:11:32,162 Maybe I would have done stuff differently. 1273 01:11:32,796 --> 01:11:34,530 Don't be so hard on yourself. 1274 01:11:34,663 --> 01:11:37,266 You know, you've gone through a lot. 1275 01:11:38,301 --> 01:11:41,304 Look, I know that I shut you out 1276 01:11:41,436 --> 01:11:43,673 and I'm sorry about that. 1277 01:11:49,444 --> 01:11:52,381 I thought some time apart for us would be good. 1278 01:11:53,483 --> 01:11:57,253 You know, we haven't had that, like, ever. 1279 01:11:58,988 --> 01:12:00,856 And I wanted to talk to you about this stuff 1280 01:12:00,990 --> 01:12:05,362 but then you got sick and you needed me. 1281 01:12:06,162 --> 01:12:08,730 You know, I've always taken care of you, 1282 01:12:08,864 --> 01:12:13,502 but I don't even know who I am outside of us. 1283 01:12:13,636 --> 01:12:14,904 You know? 1284 01:12:15,604 --> 01:12:17,172 I wanted to date to make sure 1285 01:12:17,306 --> 01:12:19,541 that we were making the right decision. 1286 01:12:20,176 --> 01:12:23,379 And I admit, it's selfish, 1287 01:12:23,512 --> 01:12:28,150 but being here with our totally crazy parents 1288 01:12:28,283 --> 01:12:32,054 and seeing you go through this all on your own... 1289 01:12:33,689 --> 01:12:35,057 I don't know. 1290 01:12:36,591 --> 01:12:38,394 I still love you, Bailey. 1291 01:12:41,564 --> 01:12:43,298 I found another lump. 1292 01:12:44,300 --> 01:12:48,171 - Wait, what? - It's small, but I had some tests. 1293 01:12:50,372 --> 01:12:51,841 Yeah. 1294 01:12:51,975 --> 01:12:56,980 They caught it early and they have to remove it. 1295 01:12:57,113 --> 01:12:59,282 Like, the rest of it. 1296 01:13:02,685 --> 01:13:05,688 Well, if it's that serious, then you shouldn't be here. 1297 01:13:05,822 --> 01:13:07,989 You should be getting the procedure. 1298 01:13:08,123 --> 01:13:09,759 - I mean, what if it's... - I know. 1299 01:13:09,891 --> 01:13:11,127 I just... 1300 01:13:13,128 --> 01:13:15,297 I need time to process it. 1301 01:13:16,365 --> 01:13:17,399 Okay. 1302 01:13:18,533 --> 01:13:19,802 Do your parents know? 1303 01:13:20,369 --> 01:13:22,939 No. 1304 01:13:23,073 --> 01:13:25,008 They don't need that again. 1305 01:13:27,076 --> 01:13:30,279 Well, we'll figure this out, okay? 1306 01:14:39,114 --> 01:14:41,483 I like the horsepower underneath. 1307 01:14:41,617 --> 01:14:43,220 No pun intended. 1308 01:14:44,453 --> 01:14:45,488 Mom? 1309 01:14:47,256 --> 01:14:49,592 Stop it. 1310 01:14:53,462 --> 01:14:54,331 Mom. 1311 01:14:54,463 --> 01:14:56,332 Little bean! 1312 01:14:56,466 --> 01:14:57,534 You made it! 1313 01:14:57,667 --> 01:14:59,702 Oh, my God! 1314 01:14:59,835 --> 01:15:02,104 You okay? 1315 01:15:02,238 --> 01:15:04,007 You must be starving, come join us. 1316 01:15:04,140 --> 01:15:06,375 I'm okay. Who's this? 1317 01:15:06,509 --> 01:15:09,979 Bill was helping me paint the porch yesterday. 1318 01:15:10,112 --> 01:15:13,917 I invited him to stay over so we could get to know each other better. 1319 01:15:14,050 --> 01:15:16,185 You don't need any help painting the porch, Mom. 1320 01:15:16,319 --> 01:15:18,387 Sit, sit! Is it just you? 1321 01:15:18,520 --> 01:15:22,358 Where is that stud you've been dragging across the country? 1322 01:15:22,492 --> 01:15:25,327 I've been reading about you two's shenanigans. 1323 01:15:25,461 --> 01:15:29,365 - Yeah, that wasn't a thing. - Well, never is. 1324 01:15:30,065 --> 01:15:31,199 Bill and I are going out tonight. 1325 01:15:31,333 --> 01:15:33,501 You totally have to tear it up with us. 1326 01:15:33,636 --> 01:15:37,106 No, I have a lot of work to do and I'm not gonna be here very long, so. 1327 01:15:37,238 --> 01:15:39,140 Uh-uh, uh-uh, uh. 1328 01:15:39,274 --> 01:15:40,710 You do not get to be a drag. 1329 01:15:40,842 --> 01:15:43,244 No, I'm just gonna go to my room. 1330 01:15:43,378 --> 01:15:46,515 No, come on, come out with us! 1331 01:15:46,649 --> 01:15:48,018 He doesn't bite. 1332 01:15:48,585 --> 01:15:49,618 Hard. 1333 01:15:54,524 --> 01:15:55,992 So what time do you two fly out? 1334 01:15:56,125 --> 01:15:57,327 10:00 a.m. tomorrow. 1335 01:15:57,460 --> 01:15:59,095 And thank you again for getting Bailey and I 1336 01:15:59,229 --> 01:16:00,896 on the same flight, that was very nice of you. 1337 01:16:01,029 --> 01:16:02,064 You're welcome. 1338 01:16:02,198 --> 01:16:03,500 Yeah, I just think it's a good idea 1339 01:16:03,632 --> 01:16:05,635 for Bailey not to be alone right now. 1340 01:16:07,136 --> 01:16:08,304 Is everything all right, Bailey? 1341 01:16:08,438 --> 01:16:10,271 Yeah, no, everything's fine. 1342 01:16:10,405 --> 01:16:11,873 Are you sure everything's fine? 1343 01:16:12,007 --> 01:16:13,175 Mm-hmm. 1344 01:16:14,042 --> 01:16:15,577 - Liz? - Well... 1345 01:16:15,711 --> 01:16:16,913 Don't ask her. 1346 01:16:17,046 --> 01:16:18,949 I said everything's fine, okay? 1347 01:16:19,548 --> 01:16:21,083 Okay. 1348 01:16:22,351 --> 01:16:26,021 I just meant that we're all here for you right now, 1349 01:16:26,155 --> 01:16:27,055 to help you. 1350 01:16:27,189 --> 01:16:29,325 - Are you? - Yes. 1351 01:16:29,457 --> 01:16:33,295 And when we go home, I'm gonna be there to support you. 1352 01:16:33,796 --> 01:16:36,066 With what exactly? 1353 01:16:39,368 --> 01:16:41,603 Don't you think we should tell them? 1354 01:16:41,738 --> 01:16:43,239 Tell us what? 1355 01:16:45,807 --> 01:16:47,476 I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... 1356 01:16:49,244 --> 01:16:50,912 Bailey found another lump 1357 01:16:51,046 --> 01:16:53,315 and the doctor said that it's cancerous. 1358 01:16:53,448 --> 01:16:56,318 What? How can that be? 1359 01:16:56,452 --> 01:16:58,186 I thought they replaced, you know. 1360 01:16:58,320 --> 01:17:00,288 I mean, it's not the same testicle, Mom. 1361 01:17:00,422 --> 01:17:01,289 Honey. 1362 01:17:01,422 --> 01:17:03,059 You said that everything was fine. 1363 01:17:03,192 --> 01:17:04,525 'Cause everything is fine. 1364 01:17:04,659 --> 01:17:06,761 Ron, we're going back to Atlanta with him. 1365 01:17:06,895 --> 01:17:09,733 He needs us to take care of him, Liz can't do that on... 1366 01:17:09,865 --> 01:17:12,101 No one needs to take care of me! 1367 01:17:13,636 --> 01:17:17,606 Look, I didn't ask for help because I don't need help. 1368 01:17:18,507 --> 01:17:22,711 And frankly, Liz, that wasn't yours to share. 1369 01:17:27,949 --> 01:17:29,217 You're right. 1370 01:17:29,351 --> 01:17:31,587 I'm... I'm sorry. 1371 01:17:32,854 --> 01:17:36,425 I just, you know, I haven't been there for you recently 1372 01:17:36,559 --> 01:17:40,063 and I... I didn't want to mess that up again. 1373 01:17:44,100 --> 01:17:45,868 Everything'll be fine. 1374 01:17:53,943 --> 01:17:55,211 Mom? 1375 01:20:56,059 --> 01:20:57,293 Little bean. 1376 01:20:57,426 --> 01:21:00,528 What are you doing up? 1377 01:21:00,662 --> 01:21:02,297 Where you been all day? 1378 01:21:02,430 --> 01:21:04,600 What are you, my parole officer? 1379 01:21:06,435 --> 01:21:09,205 I'm leaving tomorrow, remember? 1380 01:21:09,337 --> 01:21:10,672 Oh, yeah. Right. 1381 01:21:10,806 --> 01:21:15,211 Um, if you're flying, 1382 01:21:15,345 --> 01:21:18,548 you need to tow that eyesore off my curb first. 1383 01:21:19,614 --> 01:21:23,351 I was hoping that you would help me fix it. 1384 01:21:23,485 --> 01:21:26,722 Well, I do know my way around an engine. 1385 01:21:27,922 --> 01:21:30,559 - You gonna be up that early? - Yeah, probably not. 1386 01:21:32,327 --> 01:21:34,631 Just call the guys down at Mario's. 1387 01:21:37,099 --> 01:21:38,501 Yeah, right, okay. 1388 01:21:40,403 --> 01:21:43,338 - What? - Nothing. 1389 01:21:46,108 --> 01:21:47,943 What's wrong now? 1390 01:21:48,077 --> 01:21:52,079 I thought that... I don't know what I thought. 1391 01:21:52,213 --> 01:21:53,515 I, um... 1392 01:21:54,850 --> 01:21:57,453 I just haven't been home in a while. 1393 01:21:58,052 --> 01:21:59,721 Whose fault is that? 1394 01:22:02,091 --> 01:22:03,393 Mom. 1395 01:22:04,292 --> 01:22:07,162 This sucks. 1396 01:22:07,930 --> 01:22:13,302 Mom, um... I know that I'm not easy... 1397 01:22:14,703 --> 01:22:17,507 - and you're not easy either. - Jesus. 1398 01:22:18,373 --> 01:22:20,274 But I know that's not your fault 1399 01:22:20,408 --> 01:22:25,547 and I think... 1400 01:22:25,680 --> 01:22:29,284 there might be something wrong with me. 1401 01:22:30,118 --> 01:22:32,621 And I don't really understand what it is... 1402 01:22:35,257 --> 01:22:37,693 but I think I might have a problem. 1403 01:22:39,194 --> 01:22:41,797 Honey, we all have problems. 1404 01:22:42,597 --> 01:22:44,500 No, Mom. Um... 1405 01:22:45,634 --> 01:22:48,538 I've been going to this group lately, this... 1406 01:22:49,604 --> 01:22:51,406 At first I didn't even take it seriously 1407 01:22:51,541 --> 01:22:53,042 and I thought it was stupid. 1408 01:22:54,443 --> 01:22:56,713 But I think that maybe... 1409 01:22:59,215 --> 01:23:02,051 and I think that you should find something similar. 1410 01:23:02,952 --> 01:23:07,957 It's for addicts. It's for sex and love addicts. 1411 01:23:15,497 --> 01:23:17,400 Honey. 1412 01:23:18,434 --> 01:23:22,237 Those groups are for men making excuses 1413 01:23:22,371 --> 01:23:26,742 about philandering and shaming women 1414 01:23:26,875 --> 01:23:29,112 for being just as sexual as they are. 1415 01:23:30,679 --> 01:23:33,582 But you are a liberated woman 1416 01:23:33,716 --> 01:23:36,485 and you don't care what people think 1417 01:23:36,618 --> 01:23:40,287 and you are not ashamed of what you do. 1418 01:23:40,421 --> 01:23:46,060 And that's... That is one of the things I love most about you. 1419 01:23:46,828 --> 01:23:48,965 Probably because I taught it to you. 1420 01:23:51,199 --> 01:23:52,902 That's not me. 1421 01:23:53,903 --> 01:23:55,738 Since when? 1422 01:23:59,507 --> 01:24:00,909 Good night, Mom. 1423 01:24:54,930 --> 01:24:57,066 Hey, Liz, what's your porn star name? 1424 01:24:57,199 --> 01:24:58,367 What? 1425 01:24:58,501 --> 01:24:59,868 You know, like, the name of your first pet 1426 01:25:00,002 --> 01:25:01,203 and the street you grew up on? 1427 01:25:01,336 --> 01:25:02,538 Why would you ask me that? 1428 01:25:02,671 --> 01:25:04,405 It's a game. It's fun. 1429 01:25:04,539 --> 01:25:07,210 It's not funny, Bailey. It's just weird. 1430 01:25:10,679 --> 01:25:11,646 What are you doing? 1431 01:25:11,779 --> 01:25:13,648 Our Uber's here, let's go. 1432 01:25:16,784 --> 01:25:18,753 I'm not going with you. 1433 01:25:19,453 --> 01:25:20,989 What, why? 1434 01:25:23,391 --> 01:25:25,260 Liz, I missed you. 1435 01:25:25,394 --> 01:25:29,164 Like, hanging out this weekend with our parents, 1436 01:25:29,296 --> 01:25:30,899 I miss that too. 1437 01:25:32,333 --> 01:25:34,603 But... it kinda sucked. 1438 01:25:34,735 --> 01:25:37,006 You know, like all of it. 1439 01:25:38,073 --> 01:25:39,708 Um, okay. 1440 01:25:40,909 --> 01:25:43,677 Liz, when you left, I thought it was because I had cancer. 1441 01:25:43,811 --> 01:25:47,048 Like, me getting sick had broken us down, 1442 01:25:47,181 --> 01:25:49,952 maybe like you weren't attracted to me? 1443 01:25:50,519 --> 01:25:53,556 But I understand. 1444 01:25:54,855 --> 01:25:58,460 I don't wanna be together just because it's easier 1445 01:25:58,594 --> 01:26:01,096 than being alone, you know, like... 1446 01:26:01,229 --> 01:26:05,000 So you just don't want to be with me anymore. 1447 01:26:05,801 --> 01:26:08,604 I mean, did we get back together? 1448 01:26:09,171 --> 01:26:10,305 I thought so. 1449 01:26:10,439 --> 01:26:12,108 I mean, I want to. 1450 01:26:13,274 --> 01:26:14,576 Do you? 1451 01:26:15,645 --> 01:26:17,045 Yeah. 1452 01:26:17,179 --> 01:26:18,547 Yeah, I think so. 1453 01:26:18,680 --> 01:26:23,418 Liz, I think what we want is the idea of us. 1454 01:26:23,551 --> 01:26:26,322 But we're not those same kids anymore 1455 01:26:28,090 --> 01:26:29,625 and that's okay. 1456 01:26:33,930 --> 01:26:35,864 Are you sure that this is what you want, 1457 01:26:35,997 --> 01:26:39,034 with everything that's going on? 1458 01:26:39,167 --> 01:26:40,235 Yeah. 1459 01:26:50,444 --> 01:26:53,514 Does this mean that you're gonna stop stalking me on Instagram? 1460 01:26:55,350 --> 01:26:56,652 - I'll cut back. - Yeah? 1461 01:26:56,784 --> 01:26:58,252 - I'll cut back on it. - You gotta slowly wean it away. 1462 01:26:58,386 --> 01:27:00,454 - Yeah, exactly. - We have to walk to the same spot, 1463 01:27:00,588 --> 01:27:01,690 so you can just bring my bags. 1464 01:27:01,823 --> 01:27:03,458 - All right, that's a deal. - Yeah. 1465 01:27:03,591 --> 01:27:06,094 Yeah, I'm not gonna cold turkey stop Instagram stalking you. 1466 01:27:06,228 --> 01:27:09,198 No, I mean, of course not, my pics are lit. Why would you? 1467 01:27:09,332 --> 01:27:12,401 You can see what orange wine guy's up to. 1468 01:27:12,533 --> 01:27:14,302 - Oh. - Is his name like Arman? 1469 01:27:14,435 --> 01:27:17,305 It is Arman! 1470 01:27:49,904 --> 01:27:51,139 What are you doing? 1471 01:27:52,640 --> 01:27:55,978 If I were you, I would junk this thing 1472 01:27:56,110 --> 01:27:58,648 for whatever scraps are still worth a damn. 1473 01:28:02,384 --> 01:28:06,721 It still might get you home, if that's where you're headed. 1474 01:28:06,854 --> 01:28:10,358 Yeah, I don't know where I'm headed anymore. 1475 01:28:12,961 --> 01:28:15,297 Yeah, I've heard that before. 1476 01:28:17,699 --> 01:28:19,335 You know, I was thinking... 1477 01:28:20,301 --> 01:28:22,270 the funny thing about being a mom 1478 01:28:22,404 --> 01:28:25,774 is whenever something new happens with your kid, 1479 01:28:25,908 --> 01:28:27,843 it's your first chance to figure out 1480 01:28:27,975 --> 01:28:29,978 what the hell you're supposed to do about it. 1481 01:28:30,112 --> 01:28:33,349 And when you only have one... 1482 01:28:34,783 --> 01:28:37,086 you only get one chance. 1483 01:28:40,890 --> 01:28:43,659 I know you got places to go, 1484 01:28:43,792 --> 01:28:47,562 but I could make us some breakfast 1485 01:28:47,695 --> 01:28:49,864 if you're not in too much of a hurry. 1486 01:28:53,502 --> 01:28:55,905 Yeah. I'd like that. 1487 01:28:58,573 --> 01:28:59,741 Okay. 1488 01:29:43,118 --> 01:29:45,988 She said she didn't want to burden me with it 1489 01:29:46,121 --> 01:29:48,457 because my operation had gone well 1490 01:29:48,590 --> 01:29:51,426 and my cell count had improved. 1491 01:29:51,559 --> 01:29:55,131 I mean, she was there by my side throughout all of this. 1492 01:29:56,730 --> 01:30:00,268 So I just don't understand why she would hide it from me. 1493 01:30:01,502 --> 01:30:02,938 I'm sorry. 1494 01:30:03,072 --> 01:30:05,974 Everyone has a different way of processing their diagnosis. 1495 01:30:06,108 --> 01:30:08,743 But the important thing is that we're patient. 1496 01:30:09,743 --> 01:30:12,148 Does anyone else have anything they want to add to that? 1497 01:30:13,747 --> 01:30:16,050 Molly, would you like to share? 1498 01:30:17,386 --> 01:30:19,054 I do. 1499 01:30:19,186 --> 01:30:21,789 As in, I think I have something to add to that. 1500 01:30:21,922 --> 01:30:23,192 Okay. 1501 01:30:23,324 --> 01:30:24,659 And I'm definitely in the right room this time, 1502 01:30:24,792 --> 01:30:27,695 I know that, and I'm definitely sober. 1503 01:30:27,828 --> 01:30:29,230 I think. Yes. 1504 01:30:29,364 --> 01:30:31,733 Um, it's just that Molly's been waiting for a while. 1505 01:30:31,865 --> 01:30:33,969 Is it okay if Bailey goes first? 1506 01:30:34,103 --> 01:30:35,737 Clearly I have all the time in the world. 1507 01:30:35,871 --> 01:30:39,275 Yeah, great. If that's okay with, I mean, I'll be so quick. 1508 01:30:40,007 --> 01:30:41,844 Okay, thank you. 1509 01:30:43,944 --> 01:30:45,212 Hi, everyone. 1510 01:30:46,280 --> 01:30:50,952 Uh, I guess I've been so reluctant to share recently... 1511 01:30:53,354 --> 01:30:56,357 because I've been scared, you know. 1512 01:30:56,490 --> 01:31:00,561 Even with something not as life-threatening as TC, 1513 01:31:00,694 --> 01:31:04,032 I've been afraid to, like, face a second diagnosis. 1514 01:31:04,166 --> 01:31:06,134 Which I guess is why a couple weeks ago, 1515 01:31:06,266 --> 01:31:08,670 I went on this crazy road trip. 1516 01:31:08,804 --> 01:31:11,907 I don't know, maybe I was trying to distract myself 1517 01:31:12,039 --> 01:31:14,609 from, like, all this, you know. 1518 01:31:15,877 --> 01:31:19,414 But the person that I end up going with, 1519 01:31:20,216 --> 01:31:24,653 she turned out to be really cool. Yeah. 1520 01:31:25,220 --> 01:31:28,557 She wasn't grossed out... 1521 01:31:29,625 --> 01:31:35,063 and she wasn't even like sympathetic, you know? 1522 01:31:35,195 --> 01:31:38,567 Like she just made me feel normal. 1523 01:31:39,768 --> 01:31:45,340 And... I used her, you know? 1524 01:31:46,073 --> 01:31:49,043 And like an asshole, I shamed her. 1525 01:31:50,478 --> 01:31:54,416 She made me feel better and I screwed it up. 1526 01:31:57,019 --> 01:32:00,822 So tomorrow is my second orchiectomy 1527 01:32:00,956 --> 01:32:03,659 and I feel like shit about it. 1528 01:32:06,094 --> 01:32:08,096 And I'm still terrified. 1529 01:32:10,198 --> 01:32:15,404 But also, I feel... like I can handle it. 1530 01:32:16,871 --> 01:32:17,873 Thank you for sharing. 1531 01:32:18,006 --> 01:32:19,841 And I bet if you told your friend 1532 01:32:19,975 --> 01:32:21,410 what you just shared with us, 1533 01:32:21,542 --> 01:32:23,144 the two of you could work it out. 1534 01:32:23,278 --> 01:32:26,181 Molly, thank you for being so patient. 1535 01:32:26,314 --> 01:32:28,517 - Would you like to share now? - Sure. 1536 01:32:28,649 --> 01:32:30,618 Uh, basically I've just been feeling like... 1537 01:32:30,752 --> 01:32:32,987 - Actually, can I jump in here? - Seriously? 1538 01:32:33,121 --> 01:32:34,623 Oh, we're just in the middle of something. 1539 01:32:34,756 --> 01:32:36,625 - If you just... If you want to take a seat. - Sorry, I just feel 1540 01:32:36,757 --> 01:32:39,360 like my story has a lot in common with Bailey's. 1541 01:32:40,962 --> 01:32:42,964 Hi, I'm Darla. 1542 01:32:43,097 --> 01:32:45,399 And I'm new, obviously. 1543 01:32:45,533 --> 01:32:50,338 And... I have breast cancer apparently. 1544 01:32:51,640 --> 01:32:54,542 Weirdly enough, I, too, went on a trip, 1545 01:32:54,676 --> 01:32:58,213 a trip that I lied about needing for therapeutic purposes. 1546 01:32:58,346 --> 01:33:01,515 Not about my boob stuff, about something else. 1547 01:33:02,417 --> 01:33:05,887 Something that I always thought made me exciting 1548 01:33:06,020 --> 01:33:09,290 and good at my job and in control. 1549 01:33:10,591 --> 01:33:15,463 But the guy that I was with made me realize that maybe I had a problem. 1550 01:33:16,832 --> 01:33:18,466 And that's really scary, 1551 01:33:18,600 --> 01:33:21,103 finding out that you might have a problem 1552 01:33:21,235 --> 01:33:23,805 and you don't know how to fix it right away. 1553 01:33:23,939 --> 01:33:26,173 But this guy was really cool about it. 1554 01:33:27,175 --> 01:33:31,846 And for the first time ever, I trusted somebody. 1555 01:33:32,713 --> 01:33:36,118 And then I did something really shitty to him. 1556 01:33:38,051 --> 01:33:39,287 And normally I wouldn't really care 1557 01:33:39,421 --> 01:33:42,458 because I don't usually like most people... 1558 01:33:43,425 --> 01:33:47,128 but this guy wasn't like most people. 1559 01:33:50,399 --> 01:33:52,067 So... 1560 01:33:52,967 --> 01:33:54,836 Anyway, I don't really know... 1561 01:33:54,970 --> 01:33:58,106 What I'm trying to say is... 1562 01:34:02,144 --> 01:34:03,211 fuck cancer. 1563 01:34:03,345 --> 01:34:04,813 Am I right? 1564 01:34:04,947 --> 01:34:06,715 Yeah. 1565 01:34:06,847 --> 01:34:08,182 Thank you for that, Darla. 1566 01:34:08,315 --> 01:34:10,050 And welcome to the circle. 1567 01:34:10,184 --> 01:34:11,985 Molly, would you like to share now? 1568 01:34:12,119 --> 01:34:14,355 Are you sure? Does anybody else have any... 1569 01:34:14,488 --> 01:34:16,123 It sounds like you were an asshole to this guy. 1570 01:34:16,257 --> 01:34:19,193 - Oh, come on! - I mean, yes, I was an asshole, 1571 01:34:19,327 --> 01:34:21,162 but he was kind of a dick. 1572 01:34:21,296 --> 01:34:22,898 For the record, I think you're both dicks. 1573 01:34:23,030 --> 01:34:25,199 You know, my surgery is tomorrow. 1574 01:34:25,333 --> 01:34:26,501 Things are gonna be different after. 1575 01:34:26,635 --> 01:34:28,470 - I know. - You two know each other? 1576 01:34:28,603 --> 01:34:30,570 I guess if you're gonna be serious about recovery, 1577 01:34:30,704 --> 01:34:32,873 - you probably shouldn't... - Not for a while. 1578 01:34:33,007 --> 01:34:34,208 Okay, they know each other. 1579 01:34:34,341 --> 01:34:36,978 Yeah, and you probably need time, right, to... 1580 01:34:37,110 --> 01:34:38,579 Probably. Yeah. 1581 01:34:39,113 --> 01:34:40,681 Worst timing ever, huh? 1582 01:34:41,215 --> 01:34:42,382 Maybe the best? 1583 01:34:42,516 --> 01:34:45,421 This is the weirdest fucking support group. 1584 01:34:46,421 --> 01:34:48,088 - No, sorry. - Yeah, go ahead. 1585 01:34:48,221 --> 01:34:50,692 You go ahead, I mean, who cares about us? We're just blabbing on... 1586 01:34:50,826 --> 01:34:52,527 It sounds like a great trip. 1587 01:34:52,661 --> 01:34:54,729 Um, I just want to get back to Molly. 1588 01:34:55,764 --> 01:34:59,801 Anyway, we were on this bench in Amsterdam... 1589 01:35:02,403 --> 01:35:05,506 So we decided to just be friends. 1590 01:35:05,640 --> 01:35:07,809 Just for like one year, 1591 01:35:07,943 --> 01:35:10,112 which seemed like a responsible amount of time 1592 01:35:10,244 --> 01:35:13,480 for us to, you know, get our shit together. 1593 01:35:14,481 --> 01:35:16,818 I guess after my blog doubled traffic 1594 01:35:16,951 --> 01:35:19,688 to the website, Tanya offered me my job back. 1595 01:35:19,822 --> 01:35:22,590 This place could use a voice like yours. 1596 01:35:22,724 --> 01:35:23,826 This voice. 1597 01:35:24,826 --> 01:35:25,860 I... 1598 01:35:26,828 --> 01:35:27,963 I can't. 1599 01:35:28,096 --> 01:35:29,529 I think I've just been realizing lately 1600 01:35:29,663 --> 01:35:33,167 that maybe this place and what I've been writing about... 1601 01:35:34,168 --> 01:35:35,837 isn't good for me anymore. 1602 01:35:37,805 --> 01:35:39,740 It's crazy that she's not my boss anymore, 1603 01:35:39,875 --> 01:35:43,479 but I still use her as my emergency contact. 1604 01:35:45,046 --> 01:35:46,748 I got the new job. 1605 01:35:46,881 --> 01:35:50,318 I'm an illustrator for this new graphic design firm. 1606 01:35:51,185 --> 01:35:53,087 I know my parents still have no idea 1607 01:35:53,220 --> 01:35:57,958 how I make money drawing, but they're coming around. 1608 01:35:58,893 --> 01:36:01,729 Well, I've been working on something. 1609 01:36:01,863 --> 01:36:03,064 It's mostly about me 1610 01:36:03,198 --> 01:36:04,966 and the stupid shit that I've done, 1611 01:36:05,100 --> 01:36:06,969 but it's also about my mom, 1612 01:36:07,101 --> 01:36:09,304 because there's a lot to unpack there. 1613 01:36:09,438 --> 01:36:12,539 And yeah, a lot of it is about sex. 1614 01:36:13,039 --> 01:36:15,510 But a lot of it isn't. 1615 01:36:15,644 --> 01:36:19,814 And somehow, I managed to get an advance from a publisher. 1616 01:36:20,814 --> 01:36:22,850 Liz still checks in on me 1617 01:36:22,984 --> 01:36:25,287 but I took her advice. 1618 01:36:25,420 --> 01:36:27,556 I've been hanging out with other people. 1619 01:36:27,689 --> 01:36:30,025 We've been seeing each other a lot. 1620 01:36:30,158 --> 01:36:32,094 I mean, platonically. 1621 01:36:33,360 --> 01:36:36,331 It's been nice having someone to share things with. 1622 01:36:37,698 --> 01:36:39,100 Especially during the hard times. 1623 01:36:39,234 --> 01:36:40,469 Hey. 1624 01:36:41,502 --> 01:36:42,938 What's wrong? What'd they say? 1625 01:36:47,975 --> 01:36:49,176 Stop it! 1626 01:36:49,310 --> 01:36:51,713 And the good ones. 1627 01:36:52,646 --> 01:36:56,184 And today marks one year since my surgery. 1628 01:36:56,318 --> 01:37:01,222 And after chemo, I am officially in remission. 1629 01:37:04,024 --> 01:37:09,063 Plus the sperm I banked before my first orchiectomy is still good, 1630 01:37:09,197 --> 01:37:11,431 so my mother hasn't disowned me. 1631 01:37:11,565 --> 01:37:15,703 And also, I don't have to use condoms, so... 1632 01:37:17,671 --> 01:37:19,940 I mean, okay, but still like, 1633 01:37:20,073 --> 01:37:22,976 we'll use protection, I think. It's like the over... 1634 01:37:23,109 --> 01:37:25,514 - 'cause there's like a million strains of... - I got it. 1635 01:37:25,646 --> 01:37:27,114 I did the banana thing in health class. 1636 01:37:27,247 --> 01:37:29,183 Good, they're still doing that. 1637 01:37:29,318 --> 01:37:30,518 Good. 1638 01:37:30,650 --> 01:37:32,220 I mean, I still struggle, 1639 01:37:32,353 --> 01:37:34,288 especially with not watching porn. 1640 01:37:34,421 --> 01:37:36,089 That was a big one for me. 1641 01:37:36,990 --> 01:37:40,429 I miss getting attention. I miss the validation 1642 01:37:40,561 --> 01:37:42,296 that came from getting attention, 1643 01:37:42,430 --> 01:37:45,267 but I know that's not worth it now. 1644 01:37:45,399 --> 01:37:50,504 Because I know now that's not what any of this is really about. 1645 01:37:51,838 --> 01:37:55,876 I had to take a long good look at what was under my hood. 1646 01:37:57,045 --> 01:37:59,547 And with the help of my sponsor, 1647 01:38:00,981 --> 01:38:03,650 this feels pretty cool. 1648 01:38:04,484 --> 01:38:06,387 I mean, it's not as good as sex, but... 1649 01:38:08,288 --> 01:38:09,557 It'll do. 1650 01:38:13,528 --> 01:38:15,864 - I will see you later. - Yeah. 1651 01:38:15,997 --> 01:38:17,632 Thank you. See ya. 1652 01:38:17,765 --> 01:38:19,767 That was cool, Darla. Congrats. 1653 01:38:19,900 --> 01:38:21,336 Thanks, Rob. 1654 01:38:21,470 --> 01:38:23,238 Well, if it isn't Ms. Kelly. 1655 01:38:23,371 --> 01:38:24,739 Ah, it's the hall monitor again. 1656 01:38:24,872 --> 01:38:26,673 You know, you can't smoke those in here. 1657 01:38:26,806 --> 01:38:28,943 Oh yeah, someone told me that once. 1658 01:38:29,610 --> 01:38:31,345 One addiction at a time. 1659 01:38:32,213 --> 01:38:33,948 A whole year, huh? 1660 01:38:34,716 --> 01:38:35,751 Yeah. 1661 01:38:36,984 --> 01:38:42,958 So, would you like to go to dinner with me tonight? 1662 01:38:43,557 --> 01:38:44,926 Like on a date? 1663 01:38:45,060 --> 01:38:49,364 - Mm. - Hmm, lucky for you, I just became available. 1664 01:38:50,698 --> 01:38:52,767 So, where you wanna go? 1665 01:38:52,900 --> 01:38:54,769 I don't know, where do people go on dates? 1666 01:38:54,903 --> 01:38:56,570 I haven't been on a date since high school. 1667 01:38:56,703 --> 01:38:59,606 I don't think I've been on a date ever. 1668 01:38:59,740 --> 01:39:02,543 - Eh? - We'll figure it out. 1669 01:42:19,219 --> 01:42:24,219 Subtitles by explosiveskull www.OpenSubtitles.org