1
00:01:32,175 --> 00:01:34,176
I think you have the wrong room.

2
00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:36,095
That, sir, is my wife.

3
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:40,724
Uh-huh, I must apologise.

4
00:01:41,684 --> 00:01:45,187
Nothing in her conduct made me think
she'd ever been satisfied before.

5
00:01:48,691 --> 00:01:49,775
Aha.

6
00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:56,698
Gentlemen.

7
00:01:58,618 --> 00:02:03,872
We are here to honor our friend,
Henry Sebastian Aldershot,

8
00:02:05,166 --> 00:02:07,084
Seventh Duke of Carlisle,

9
00:02:07,919 --> 00:02:11,505
known to us as Lord Riot.

10
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:18,220
The best scholar
at the world's greatest university.

11
00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:24,017
He did nothing without joy,

12
00:02:24,060 --> 00:02:26,061
and everything to excess.

13
00:02:29,607 --> 00:02:33,277
Wingspan! This is, gentlemen, key.

14
00:02:33,361 --> 00:02:36,446
A true hedonist,
who dazzled us with debauchery.

15
00:02:39,617 --> 00:02:42,578
His appetites knew no earthly bounds.

16
00:02:45,915 --> 00:02:49,209
No man was better loved by all he met,

17
00:02:51,754 --> 00:02:55,174
nor gave his time more generously.

18
00:02:55,258 --> 00:02:57,092
Get down, get down!

19
00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:02,139
We thought to see him
Lord Chief Justice one day.

20
00:03:02,765 --> 00:03:07,269
But you live by the sword,
you die by the sword.

21
00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:10,606
And, friends, Lord Riot
died this morning.

22
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,483
- Legend.
- Mmm.

23
00:03:15,820 --> 00:03:17,279
He will not be forgotten.

24
00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:19,615
- He will not.
- Ever.

25
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:23,160
We will gather the brightest,

26
00:03:23,244 --> 00:03:25,996
the boldest and the best

27
00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:30,584
to eat till we are sick at
the full table of life,

28
00:03:30,627 --> 00:03:34,129
and never to fade from glory.

29
00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:40,302
And we will call ourselves

30
00:03:41,721 --> 00:03:43,347
the Riot Club.

31
00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:45,265
The Riot Club!

32
00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:19,841
- I am an alumnus of this college...
- I'm terribly sorry, sir.

33
00:04:19,884 --> 00:04:22,302
- Dad, the other one's fine.
- That room is minute.

34
00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:24,513
- You couldn't swing a kitten.
- Mum...

35
00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:26,932
Let Daddy sort it out, Alistair.

36
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:29,518
I'm sorry, I think this is me.

37
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:32,854
This was my room, and
my elder son's room till last year...

38
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,439
I don't mind swapping,

39
00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:36,942
if this one has sentimental value.

40
00:04:38,361 --> 00:04:41,113
There we are. Isn't that nice, Alistair?

41
00:04:48,204 --> 00:04:51,123
- Well, it's very decent of you.
- No worries.

42
00:04:51,708 --> 00:04:53,208
Follow me, then.

43
00:04:58,047 --> 00:05:00,590
What if I don't want Seb's old room?

44
00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:04,261
Your brother was top dog in this college

45
00:05:04,345 --> 00:05:07,055
and you want to live in a rabbit hutch?

46
00:05:11,352 --> 00:05:13,228
Just on the left here.

47
00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:16,732
And it's that one there.

48
00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:20,110
You'll find it hasn't got a Jacuzzi.

49
00:05:20,194 --> 00:05:21,903
I'm sure it's fine.

50
00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:27,576
Oh, shit!

51
00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:40,422
We used to make things up there,
now we just sell things.

52
00:05:40,506 --> 00:05:43,550
But don't businesses sink or swim,
if an industry's become untenable?

53
00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:45,010
So why did we bail out the banks, then?

54
00:05:45,094 --> 00:05:46,928
It's different, isn't it?

55
00:05:46,971 --> 00:05:49,681
- You're talking about manufacturing...
- Oh, do you want some?

56
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,685
- Sorry, I'm Lauren.
- Miles.

57
00:05:54,937 --> 00:05:58,023
- They're serving champagne?
- No, I brought it.

58
00:05:58,107 --> 00:06:00,275
I thought, you know, big day.

59
00:06:03,946 --> 00:06:05,614
What, is it plonk?

60
00:06:06,282 --> 00:06:08,033
No, no, it's lovely.

61
00:06:10,286 --> 00:06:13,872
Mate, I'm sorry you ended up
in the prison block...

62
00:06:13,956 --> 00:06:15,540
- Ah...
- My father is...

63
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,751
- Are you in the new building?
- Yeah.

64
00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:19,711
I'm in the new building.

65
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:23,965
Actually, the New Building
is the Palladian style one

66
00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:27,135
they built in the 1700s
next to the chapel.

67
00:06:28,137 --> 00:06:30,137
There weren't any girls
at your school, were there?

68
00:06:30,765 --> 00:06:33,934
Don't worry, they're just
like us, but cleverer.

69
00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:37,354
Nice cape, by the way.

70
00:06:38,064 --> 00:06:39,189
Thanks.

71
00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:41,400
- Versace.
- Is it now?

72
00:06:41,484 --> 00:06:43,568
- Mm-hm.
- Oh, I could tell.

73
00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:47,614
Oh, the innocence.

74
00:06:47,657 --> 00:06:53,578
Is my gown inside out, am I brighter,
sexier, funnier than I was at school?

75
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:55,622
You were a fresher once.

76
00:06:57,875 --> 00:07:00,337
Care to join me in a
game of Spot the Virgin?

77
00:07:00,363 --> 00:07:01,111
Too easy.

78
00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:04,589
It'll be a damn sight harder
by tomorrow.

79
00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:24,609
- Amazing up here, isn't it?
- Mmm.

80
00:07:24,694 --> 00:07:27,404
I swear, being in Oxford, it's...

81
00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:31,783
It's like being invited to 100 parties,
all at once.

82
00:07:31,868 --> 00:07:33,910
And I wanna go to all of them, you know?

83
00:07:33,995 --> 00:07:36,163
Yeah.

84
00:07:37,665 --> 00:07:40,500
I mean, look at this.

85
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:45,213
We are so lucky.

86
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:48,925
My dad cried, you know, when I told him
I got into Oxford.

87
00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:53,638
Maybe it was just the tuition fees.

88
00:07:58,436 --> 00:08:01,438
See, my dad would've cried
if I hadn't got into Oxford.

89
00:08:01,522 --> 00:08:03,565
My whole family come here.

90
00:08:04,817 --> 00:08:08,403
My little brother, he's
13 and he can't wait.

91
00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:14,117
Miles, are you posh?

92
00:08:18,247 --> 00:08:20,081
Just normal.

93
00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:22,375
You've got quite a posh name.

94
00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:25,086
Miles Davis.

95
00:08:25,171 --> 00:08:28,757
My parents were listening
to Kind of Blue when I was conceived.

96
00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:32,969
Good job my parents didn't do that,
they'd have named me Gary Barlow.

97
00:08:39,101 --> 00:08:42,437
- So where did you go to school?
- Uh, Westminster.

98
00:08:43,439 --> 00:08:46,274
Oh, so not posh at all, then.

99
00:09:01,624 --> 00:09:04,417
I've got a bottle of
tequila back in my room

100
00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:07,754
if you wanted to come back after...

101
00:09:13,302 --> 00:09:17,973
Let's not spend three years avoiding
the person we shagged in Freshers' Week.

102
00:09:28,317 --> 00:09:30,151
Lady Marmalade.

103
00:09:30,236 --> 00:09:33,113
Oh, I know. Look at you. I know.

104
00:09:33,155 --> 00:09:36,366
It's not long, I'll be back
for Christmas.

105
00:09:36,450 --> 00:09:38,910
- Here you go.
- Thanks, Mommy. There you are.

106
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:40,579
- Bye, Mommy.
- Bye, darling.

107
00:09:43,082 --> 00:09:46,293
- Balfour, let me give you a hand there.
- Oh, thanks, mate, hello there.

108
00:09:46,335 --> 00:09:49,546
- Back to school, isn't it? Thanks ever so.
- Yeah.

109
00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:56,761
Listen, Balfour, am I right in thinking
you might be a member of the Riot Club?

110
00:09:56,846 --> 00:10:00,307
Well, you know, not supposed
to say really,

111
00:10:00,349 --> 00:10:01,975
cloak and dagger, and all that.

112
00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:04,352
Yeah, well, it's just...

113
00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:08,523
I was wondering how I might
go about applying for membership.

114
00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:09,566
Yes.

115
00:10:10,109 --> 00:10:13,194
Um, the thing is...

116
00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:18,325
And I'm terribly sorry about this, but
I'm afraid if you've got to ask,

117
00:10:18,367 --> 00:10:21,202
you're not really the right
sort of chap.

118
00:10:22,538 --> 00:10:23,538
Right.

119
00:10:26,208 --> 00:10:27,667
Guard, ready. Fence.

120
00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:29,252
Come on.

121
00:10:41,223 --> 00:10:42,891
- Darling.
- Does this hurt?

122
00:10:42,933 --> 00:10:44,225
Gosh, is he OK?

123
00:10:51,859 --> 00:10:53,819
You have no difficulties
with the time frame?

124
00:10:53,903 --> 00:10:55,236
None, absolutely none.

125
00:10:55,279 --> 00:10:57,446
And I'm keen to start
an internship straight

126
00:10:57,472 --> 00:10:59,349
after my finals, don't
need a holiday.

127
00:10:59,408 --> 00:11:03,411
You're not the son of Jonty
Leighton-Masters, are you?

128
00:11:04,455 --> 00:11:06,414
My father casts rather a long shadow.

129
00:11:06,791 --> 00:11:09,084
I want to strike out on my own,
start at the bottom somewhere.

130
00:11:09,126 --> 00:11:11,920
I'm just very passionate

131
00:11:13,964 --> 00:11:15,924
about corporate finance.

132
00:11:22,431 --> 00:11:24,015
Good luck, guys.

133
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:27,435
Mate, club meeting.
Can you do the pub tonight at, um...

134
00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:29,646
- Oh, yeah.
- What are you doing?

135
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,566
Sort of a post-match debrief.

136
00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:37,278
Right. OK, 7:30, pub, can you do it?

137
00:11:37,321 --> 00:11:39,114
I'll be there.

138
00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:45,495
I just find it really annoying
when people ask me what school
I went to.

139
00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:48,164
- Yeah. Oh, I hate it.
- I know, I hate it. Yeah, so much.

140
00:11:48,249 --> 00:11:49,708
Which school did you go to?

141
00:11:50,459 --> 00:11:52,669
I just went to a normal school
in Cardiff.

142
00:11:52,753 --> 00:11:55,547
- Oh, I've been to Cardiff.
- Oh, fantastic.

143
00:11:55,631 --> 00:11:57,006
I love the Welsh.

144
00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:05,348
- Where did you guys go?
- Eton.

145
00:12:06,642 --> 00:12:08,560
Oh, oh my God, oh my God!

146
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:12,397
Um, OK, how do you make an Eton Mess?

147
00:12:13,983 --> 00:12:17,235
Tell him he only got into Bristol.

148
00:12:17,319 --> 00:12:18,820
My best friend's at Bristol.

149
00:12:21,323 --> 00:12:22,907
It's a very good university.

150
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:24,033
Hmm.

151
00:12:26,245 --> 00:12:29,247
Uh, so I've... OK.

152
00:12:36,338 --> 00:12:38,006
- Anyway, why didn't you get a Lamborghini?
- I'm not...

153
00:12:38,048 --> 00:12:40,425
Mate, he's Greek,
he's doing austerity measures.

154
00:12:40,509 --> 00:12:43,136
- This is a beautiful British car.
- Poop poop!

155
00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:45,221
OK, guys, so we got Club dinner
coming up.

156
00:12:45,306 --> 00:12:46,848
- Kidney, Leighton?
- No, thanks.

157
00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:52,353
Um, and as you know, I'm working on a venue
that can meet our special requirements.

158
00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:53,855
Somewhere we haven't
already been banned from.

159
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:55,899
Obviously, yeah, but I need you
guys to get on with...

160
00:12:55,983 --> 00:12:57,358
- Chaps, squid?
- Here you go!

161
00:12:57,401 --> 00:12:59,694
- Mate, that's fucking rank.
- It's delicious.

162
00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:01,696
So Ed got totally rinsed.

163
00:13:01,739 --> 00:13:04,032
- Guys, this is important.
- What am I doing wrong?

164
00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:05,658
Been on a hosepipe ban all summer.

165
00:13:05,701 --> 00:13:07,869
Maybe if you didn't shark them together
like a couple of schweffes.

166
00:13:07,953 --> 00:13:10,580
I haven't had so little sex
since boarding school.

167
00:13:10,664 --> 00:13:12,248
You had more sex at boarding school.

168
00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:15,043
OK, hands up, who did fuck-all work
over the vac?

169
00:13:16,587 --> 00:13:17,712
Tubes, you worked?

170
00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:21,508
Fucking jurisprudence essay,
Dad breathing down my neck.

171
00:13:21,550 --> 00:13:22,967
If I don't get a 2:1...

172
00:13:26,096 --> 00:13:27,639
- Ooh!
- Harsh.

173
00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:29,015
Touché.

174
00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:30,642
Chaps, this is a meeting.

175
00:13:30,726 --> 00:13:33,686
Are we having elections next term?
For the presidency?

176
00:13:33,729 --> 00:13:34,979
Bell-end, you want to be President?

177
00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:36,564
Come on, I'd be awesome.

178
00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:38,525
You'd be gash.

179
00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:41,328
If we don't get any new members,
won't be anything to be President of.

180
00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:43,655
With Sebbers and Gooder leaving
last term, we're down to eight.

181
00:13:43,739 --> 00:13:45,865
Don't we have to have 10?

182
00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:47,575
Hence the meeting.

183
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:52,622
Operation Grasshopper. OK. So,
does anyone have any nominations?

184
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:58,419
The dinner's closer than you think, guys.
We've got to start initiations, yeah?

185
00:13:58,462 --> 00:14:00,699
May I say this is an
opportunity to reconsider

186
00:14:00,725 --> 00:14:02,532
the sort of person
we're approaching,

187
00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:04,926
really make sure they're
the best and the brightest?

188
00:14:05,010 --> 00:14:07,387
- You mean the prettiest.
- I meant fine minds.

189
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:09,264
- Kidney, Hugo?
- You see?

190
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:10,765
Oh, my God, that one last year.

191
00:14:10,808 --> 00:14:12,088
- Gay Harry Potter.
- Yeah.

192
00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:14,936
Harry Potter is gay.
He's clearly porking Weasley.

193
00:14:15,062 --> 00:14:19,107
Guys! Are we seriously going
to be the only year that couldn't
get 10 members?

194
00:14:19,191 --> 00:14:21,776
We're going down in history for that?

195
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:28,032
Did they go to a good school?
Eton, St Paul's, Westminster,

196
00:14:28,117 --> 00:14:30,785
Harrow, if you have to.

197
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,787
And when push comes to shove,

198
00:14:32,830 --> 00:14:35,915
do they have it in them
to be a fucking legend?

199
00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:38,960
You'll know it when you see it.

200
00:14:50,556 --> 00:14:52,181
Who's gonna get it?

201
00:14:52,266 --> 00:14:54,851
Come on, come on!

202
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:15,496
Don't scream, don't look at me.

203
00:15:15,581 --> 00:15:17,749
Put in the PIN number and take out 200.

204
00:15:18,417 --> 00:15:21,127
Come on, put in the fuckin' PIN number!

205
00:15:37,645 --> 00:15:39,938
It's actually just "PIN".

206
00:15:40,856 --> 00:15:41,856
What?

207
00:15:43,192 --> 00:15:47,028
The N stands for number,
it's Personal Identification Number.

208
00:15:47,529 --> 00:15:51,824
So, if you say "PIN number",
you're saying "number" twice.

209
00:15:51,867 --> 00:15:54,535
You're saying "Personal Identification
Number number".

210
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:56,704
It's just wrong!

211
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:02,502
- Think you're fucking clever?
- Jesus, please...

212
00:16:02,544 --> 00:16:04,462
Shut it, you posh twat.

213
00:16:05,297 --> 00:16:07,298
You pompous little prick.

214
00:16:24,316 --> 00:16:25,858
You OK, mate?

215
00:16:27,611 --> 00:16:30,822
- Yeah, I'm fine.
- Fuck, what happened to your face?

216
00:16:34,743 --> 00:16:36,077
Got mugged.

217
00:16:37,454 --> 00:16:39,872
- Hard luck, mate.
- Look, I'm fine.

218
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:44,043
- I'm fine. It doesn't matter.
- No, mate.

219
00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:47,046
Come on.

220
00:16:49,758 --> 00:16:52,385
What absolute wankers.

221
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,928
Get a job, yeah?

222
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:59,142
Shouldn't give you this,
you've probably got a concussion.

223
00:16:59,226 --> 00:17:01,811
Do you know your name and everything?

224
00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:04,272
Alistair Ryle.

225
00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:08,693
- Not related to Sebastian Ryle?
- Yeah, my brother.

226
00:17:08,777 --> 00:17:11,738
Fuck, you're Sebbers' brother?
Oh, my wow!

227
00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:15,450
- How come I didn't know you at Eton?
- I was at Harrow.

228
00:17:15,492 --> 00:17:17,201
Ah, well, can't have everything.

229
00:17:20,414 --> 00:17:21,706
Good to meet you.

230
00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,507
Whoo!

231
00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:36,137
I say! You ladies need a lift?

232
00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:39,891
- Guys, this is Sebbers' little brother.
- No jokes!

233
00:17:39,975 --> 00:17:41,642
- Hi.
- Hi. Bellingfield.

234
00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:42,769
I'm Toby.

235
00:17:42,811 --> 00:17:45,480
Your brother was, like,
the best Riot Club president ever.

236
00:17:45,522 --> 00:17:47,190
Oh, my God, Sebbers was a legend.

237
00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:49,889
How's he doing at Deutsche Bank?

238
00:17:49,943 --> 00:17:51,986
Uh, uh, they let him go, actually.

239
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:54,072
- What?
- Yeah, last in first out, so...

240
00:17:54,156 --> 00:17:55,615
Fuck, what's he doing now?

241
00:17:56,325 --> 00:18:00,912
Uh, says he's going to buy an Airstream,
big old silver caravan thing,

242
00:18:00,996 --> 00:18:03,831
start a business doing street food
at festivals and shit.

243
00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:07,168
You know, "Really good burgers"?

244
00:18:07,211 --> 00:18:08,669
Mate, get in.

245
00:18:14,009 --> 00:18:15,676
What the fuck happened to your face?

246
00:18:56,844 --> 00:18:58,511
- Hi.
- Hey.

247
00:19:03,725 --> 00:19:05,810
Did you ask for an upgrade?

248
00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:09,564
I'm skint. My tutor's paying me
to type his book up.

249
00:19:09,606 --> 00:19:11,524
I've got so much to do.

250
00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:15,695
Can I help?

251
00:19:45,309 --> 00:19:47,768
We really shouldn't be doing this.

252
00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:12,084
Mate, what the fuck
was going on in that place tonight?

253
00:20:12,127 --> 00:20:13,711
You can't dance for shit.

254
00:20:13,795 --> 00:20:16,672
Good morning, Oxford!

255
00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:20,760
- Someone put Tubes to bed, yeah?
- How about a sleep?

256
00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:21,969
Nice bit of Bedfordshire.

257
00:20:22,012 --> 00:20:25,431
The Duke of Bedfordshire!

258
00:20:25,474 --> 00:20:27,808
- I'm the king of the car!
- Whoa!

259
00:20:28,769 --> 00:20:31,145
You're magnificent, now sit down.

260
00:20:31,855 --> 00:20:33,397
Jesus fuck!

261
00:20:35,275 --> 00:20:37,235
Not on my coat!

262
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:39,779
Oh, bail out!

263
00:20:39,821 --> 00:20:41,781
Oh, that fucking, oh, my God...

264
00:20:41,823 --> 00:20:43,741
Ugh!

265
00:20:43,825 --> 00:20:45,785
That is hanging.

266
00:20:47,037 --> 00:20:48,871
- Sorry.
- Is it on my hair?

267
00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:51,165
- Bit of a thunderstorm...
- Oh!

268
00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:53,834
Come on, mate...

269
00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:58,923
Fuck it. Ashtray was full anyway.

270
00:20:59,967 --> 00:21:01,717
Thanks, Bell-end.

271
00:21:06,682 --> 00:21:09,016
Mate, the homeless can't drive.

272
00:21:12,396 --> 00:21:13,646
Pudding.

273
00:21:14,189 --> 00:21:15,982
No, dessert.

274
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:18,818
Toilet.

275
00:21:18,860 --> 00:21:20,236
Toilet?

276
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,363
Loo.

277
00:21:24,866 --> 00:21:27,076
This office is mental.

278
00:21:29,997 --> 00:21:32,581
There are some rooms here, you think,

279
00:21:32,666 --> 00:21:37,044
"This is too Oxford even for Oxford",
you know what I mean?

280
00:21:39,715 --> 00:21:42,383
Oh, napkin.

281
00:21:42,467 --> 00:21:44,260
You say "napkin"?

282
00:21:44,344 --> 00:21:47,596
No, you say "napkin".
We say "serviette".

283
00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:57,398
Dick.

284
00:21:57,482 --> 00:21:59,317
Yeah. "Dick".

285
00:22:09,453 --> 00:22:11,203
Big night last night?

286
00:22:13,457 --> 00:22:14,832
The usual.

287
00:22:15,250 --> 00:22:17,668
Yeah, I didn't sleep much either.

288
00:22:23,425 --> 00:22:24,884
Good morning.

289
00:22:26,011 --> 00:22:27,511
Please, take a seat.

290
00:22:27,596 --> 00:22:29,837
I won't be interested in excuses
about not having done it

291
00:22:29,890 --> 00:22:31,432
because you're in the college play.

292
00:22:31,516 --> 00:22:34,435
If you don't bring an essay
worthy of discussion each week,

293
00:22:34,519 --> 00:22:37,104
you let your partner down
as well as yourself.

294
00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:40,441
Your job is to provoke him,

295
00:22:40,525 --> 00:22:44,111
challenge him to be more rigorous,
examine every thought.

296
00:22:45,447 --> 00:22:46,781
Any questions?

297
00:22:49,284 --> 00:22:51,577
Do we need to like each other?

298
00:22:55,791 --> 00:22:56,791
Pull!

299
00:22:56,833 --> 00:22:58,959
Good shot.

300
00:22:59,336 --> 00:23:02,254
How do you bear it, all these tourists?

301
00:23:02,297 --> 00:23:05,007
Oh, couldn't afford to get the roof fixed
if they didn't come.

302
00:23:05,092 --> 00:23:06,092
Pull!

303
00:23:07,928 --> 00:23:10,304
It's always the roof.
No point getting misty about it.

304
00:23:10,389 --> 00:23:13,140
Our roof's got holes you could fire
a cow through.

305
00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:14,308
Pull!

306
00:23:16,019 --> 00:23:17,395
Ass biscuits!

307
00:23:17,479 --> 00:23:19,897
John Senior Sergeant over here.

308
00:23:19,981 --> 00:23:22,483
Which is absolutely beautiful
for context.

309
00:23:22,567 --> 00:23:25,111
And there's also a Van Dyck up here.

310
00:23:26,988 --> 00:23:29,907
Uh, sorry, sir, you can't go
through there.

311
00:23:40,961 --> 00:23:42,253
You're him.

312
00:23:42,337 --> 00:23:45,005
God, I'm so sorry.

313
00:23:45,090 --> 00:23:48,342
No harm done, Kerry.

314
00:23:54,850 --> 00:23:57,059
And the, uh, Van Dyck which is

315
00:23:58,395 --> 00:23:59,854
a very nice piece.

316
00:23:59,896 --> 00:24:04,191
So this my great-great-great grandfather
who was at the first ever club dinner.

317
00:24:04,234 --> 00:24:05,484
Oh!

318
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:08,529
And this

319
00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:12,032
is Lord Riot himself.

320
00:24:12,075 --> 00:24:15,035
Total fucking legend,
that's what you say, isn't it?

321
00:24:15,787 --> 00:24:17,538
Ryle, this is my uncle Jeremy.

322
00:24:18,373 --> 00:24:22,626
Uncle Jezza was Riot Club President
back in the what, 1850s?

323
00:24:22,711 --> 00:24:23,711
Little shit.

324
00:24:23,795 --> 00:24:27,047
- Pretty much runs the country now.
- Well, just the party.

325
00:24:27,132 --> 00:24:30,593
- Balfour, still bowling under arm?
- Working on it.

326
00:24:30,677 --> 00:24:33,012
- How d'you do?
- Alistair Ryle

327
00:24:33,054 --> 00:24:35,723
See you all for dinner. Beef, I think.

328
00:24:41,062 --> 00:24:44,023
Shall we get the PlayStation out,
Villiers?

329
00:24:44,065 --> 00:24:46,525
What, so I can whoop your ass again?

330
00:24:46,568 --> 00:24:49,278
We woke up the next day in Vienna.

331
00:24:49,362 --> 00:24:53,073
Passed out face down in a box of marzipan.

332
00:24:56,036 --> 00:24:58,370
That was one of
our quieter dinners.

333
00:24:58,413 --> 00:25:01,624
When, um, when my father was at Oxford,

334
00:25:01,708 --> 00:25:05,503
the Riot set off a box of fireworks
in the Randolph Hotel.

335
00:25:06,087 --> 00:25:07,254
- Oh, dear.
- Classic.

336
00:25:07,297 --> 00:25:10,925
Different times. Well, you wouldn't fuck
about like that now, would you?

337
00:25:11,009 --> 00:25:12,510
No, of course not.

338
00:25:12,594 --> 00:25:14,762
Can't have anything else in the papers.

339
00:25:14,846 --> 00:25:18,516
Nazi shit storm over student conservatives
was bad enough.

340
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:19,975
Children playing politics.

341
00:25:21,561 --> 00:25:23,938
Are you not a fan of Port
and Policy Night?

342
00:25:24,022 --> 00:25:27,650
Full of twats who think it's a free pass
into the cabinet.

343
00:25:30,070 --> 00:25:33,447
Local councilors of the future.
Well, good night, all.

344
00:25:35,784 --> 00:25:38,410
- You sorry bunch.
- Night, Jezza.

345
00:25:40,455 --> 00:25:43,040
Hello, doggies!

346
00:25:43,124 --> 00:25:44,542
Yes, hello.

347
00:25:44,626 --> 00:25:45,793
Come on, up you come.

348
00:25:49,047 --> 00:25:50,945
You know what Jezza told me?
Back in the 80s

349
00:25:50,971 --> 00:25:52,700
they used to hire a
girl for the dinner.

350
00:25:53,552 --> 00:25:55,719
- A girl?
- Prozzer.

351
00:25:55,804 --> 00:25:57,930
Put her under the table,
went round one at a time.

352
00:25:58,890 --> 00:25:59,932
Huh.

353
00:25:59,975 --> 00:26:02,017
Don't listen. Horrid boys.

354
00:26:03,061 --> 00:26:06,146
So, we're at the top university
in the world, yeah?

355
00:26:06,189 --> 00:26:07,439
Arguably.

356
00:26:07,482 --> 00:26:10,150
And so are 20,000 other people.

357
00:26:10,193 --> 00:26:13,529
But there are no more
than 10 in the Riot Club.

358
00:26:13,613 --> 00:26:14,989
The top 10.

359
00:26:20,579 --> 00:26:22,913
If you'd like, I could speak
to Leighton.

360
00:26:24,332 --> 00:26:25,499
I'll nominate you.

361
00:26:38,263 --> 00:26:42,016
Best not tell Mum about that.
Uh, George IV, I think.

362
00:26:42,058 --> 00:26:43,809
Whoops!

363
00:26:48,690 --> 00:26:50,190
That's the college rowing team.

364
00:26:50,275 --> 00:26:52,192
When they hear this
song, they have to down

365
00:26:52,218 --> 00:26:54,153
their drinks and take
off all their clothes.

366
00:26:54,195 --> 00:26:57,323
Do you not think they've noticed
it's massively homoerotic?

367
00:26:59,743 --> 00:27:02,077
I've heard the Riot Club
have an initiation

368
00:27:02,162 --> 00:27:04,288
where you pour a whole
bottle of champagne over
your head.

369
00:27:04,372 --> 00:27:05,914
Oh, brilliant.

370
00:27:05,999 --> 00:27:09,001
I think I'd rather drink it.

371
00:27:09,044 --> 00:27:11,795
Right. Anyone? Lauren, drinks?

372
00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:14,256
Oh, um, I think we're just
buying our own.

373
00:27:14,341 --> 00:27:16,550
Oh, yeah, sure. Cool.

374
00:27:27,187 --> 00:27:30,536
We do it with port,
actually, not champagne.

375
00:27:30,562 --> 00:27:32,049
It's more visceral.

376
00:27:34,027 --> 00:27:35,277
In the Riot Club?

377
00:27:36,738 --> 00:27:37,905
Miles, isn't it?

378
00:27:40,492 --> 00:27:41,909
The school plays?

379
00:27:41,993 --> 00:27:44,745
My Richard III was quite something.

380
00:27:44,829 --> 00:27:49,208
Oh, my God. You're the guy who used
to improvise limericks in Latin.

381
00:27:49,250 --> 00:27:51,251
And get bogwashed for it.

382
00:27:53,004 --> 00:27:56,048
You look, um, you look different.

383
00:27:59,094 --> 00:28:00,094
Hugo.

384
00:28:00,929 --> 00:28:04,098
- It's Hugo.
- I did remember.

385
00:28:04,182 --> 00:28:06,350
You didn't. It's fine.

386
00:28:07,686 --> 00:28:08,727
Cigarette?

387
00:28:11,398 --> 00:28:12,606
After you.

388
00:28:19,698 --> 00:28:23,409
Oh, everything you see
is begged and borrowed.

389
00:28:23,451 --> 00:28:26,370
I'm very much the ragged end
of the gentry.

390
00:28:34,421 --> 00:28:36,130
So, I must ask,

391
00:28:36,214 --> 00:28:38,895
what's a nice Westminster
boy like you doing

392
00:28:38,921 --> 00:28:41,243
with all those
boot-strappy regionals?

393
00:28:41,845 --> 00:28:45,013
I don't know, Lauren's cool, so...

394
00:28:45,598 --> 00:28:49,059
Well, you know what they say,
girls for now, girls for later.

395
00:28:55,567 --> 00:28:56,567
So...

396
00:28:57,569 --> 00:28:58,944
The Club...

397
00:29:01,531 --> 00:29:05,159
The Riot Club connects me to hundreds
of years of history.

398
00:29:05,201 --> 00:29:08,036
The dinner is debauchery
raised to an art,

399
00:29:09,330 --> 00:29:12,249
almost spiritual.

400
00:29:13,334 --> 00:29:15,210
Something is released.

401
00:29:18,798 --> 00:29:21,678
Do you know there are some people
who think they're here to get a degree?

402
00:29:40,361 --> 00:29:43,697
Yeah, listen.
Could you stop flirting with me, please?

403
00:29:43,782 --> 00:29:44,907
Oh, really?

404
00:29:47,035 --> 00:29:48,368
Go on, then.

405
00:30:14,395 --> 00:30:15,395
Help...

406
00:30:16,231 --> 00:30:17,231
Off we go!

407
00:30:17,565 --> 00:30:20,234
I've got the money for those fines.
I will be back very shortly.

408
00:30:26,741 --> 00:30:28,450
Maestro!

409
00:30:31,579 --> 00:30:32,579
Ugh!

410
00:30:37,877 --> 00:30:38,877
Spit!

411
00:30:48,429 --> 00:30:52,391
Straight, straight, straight.

412
00:31:04,946 --> 00:31:06,280
Oh!

413
00:31:06,906 --> 00:31:08,949
Chateau Petrus, 1976.

414
00:31:43,443 --> 00:31:46,862
What is the correct way to eat ortolan?

415
00:31:46,946 --> 00:31:48,906
Which is bigger, a Mordechai
or a Methuselah?

416
00:31:48,990 --> 00:31:50,574
What is a Roman shower?

417
00:31:50,658 --> 00:31:54,995
Which happens first, the Cheltenham
Gold Cup or the Grand National?

418
00:31:56,205 --> 00:31:59,249
What did Disraeli do three times
and Gladstone four?

419
00:31:59,334 --> 00:32:01,585
What does a coprophagic like to do?

420
00:32:01,669 --> 00:32:03,962
How did Edward II die?

421
00:32:04,005 --> 00:32:08,175
Which is oldest, Trinity College Cambridge
or Trinity College Oxford?

422
00:32:08,259 --> 00:32:10,844
Don't answer yet. Go, go, go!

423
00:32:12,805 --> 00:32:15,515
- Come on!
- OK

424
00:32:18,227 --> 00:32:20,187
What is the answer to question five?

425
00:32:20,271 --> 00:32:22,981
- Chancellor of the Exchequer.
- Oh, yeah!

426
00:32:24,651 --> 00:32:26,443
Forty seconds!

427
00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:30,530
- Answer in the right order.
- Yes.

428
00:32:30,573 --> 00:32:32,866
Ortolan, eat it with a
napkin over your head.

429
00:32:32,951 --> 00:32:34,743
- Come on, mate, think!
- Mordechai.

430
00:32:34,827 --> 00:32:36,578
- Getting someone to vomit on you.
- Whoa! Whoo!

431
00:32:36,663 --> 00:32:38,830
Cheltenham Gold Cup.

432
00:32:38,873 --> 00:32:41,208
- Chancellor of the Exchequer.
- Yeah!

433
00:32:42,210 --> 00:32:45,128
Shit! They do they...
They like to eat shit.

434
00:32:46,089 --> 00:32:48,173
- Red hot poker up the ass.
- Come on, mate!

435
00:32:48,216 --> 00:32:50,884
- And, uh...
- Ten seconds!

436
00:32:50,927 --> 00:32:53,679
- Trinity College, Cambridge.
- Yes!

437
00:32:54,013 --> 00:32:55,889
By nine years.

438
00:32:57,225 --> 00:32:58,767
That was actually remarkably good.

439
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:10,237
I feel polluted. Those guys are hard-core.
It was total carnage.

440
00:33:11,864 --> 00:33:14,408
Are you sure you want to be
in this thing?

441
00:33:14,450 --> 00:33:18,954
Yeah, it's actually kind of an honor
to be asked, if they want me.

442
00:33:19,038 --> 00:33:21,832
You don't even know yet?

443
00:33:21,916 --> 00:33:24,543
Well, apparently, I'll be sent a sign.

444
00:33:25,294 --> 00:33:26,586
Here.

445
00:33:26,671 --> 00:33:28,672
Well, just sip it.

446
00:33:30,008 --> 00:33:31,842
Oh, I saw your post.

447
00:33:32,719 --> 00:33:35,429
The Honorable Miles Richards?

448
00:33:37,223 --> 00:33:39,099
You're an "Honorable"?

449
00:33:43,604 --> 00:33:46,398
It's just a historical thing,

450
00:33:46,441 --> 00:33:48,483
it doesn't mean anything.

451
00:33:51,279 --> 00:33:53,822
God, are you sure you wouldn't prefer

452
00:33:53,906 --> 00:33:58,452
one of those rah girls
with all the hair?

453
00:34:01,414 --> 00:34:02,664
Listen.

454
00:34:06,002 --> 00:34:08,295
I've been out with those girls.

455
00:34:10,381 --> 00:34:13,383
And you are so much better.

456
00:34:15,344 --> 00:34:17,220
- Hmm.
- You're gorgeous.

457
00:34:17,305 --> 00:34:19,347
Everything you've just said is bollocks.

458
00:34:20,016 --> 00:34:22,017
Or to put it another way?

459
00:34:22,101 --> 00:34:24,352
Woolly liberal bollocks.

460
00:34:24,854 --> 00:34:28,774
Sorry, but calling the Beveridge Report
"a wholly positive force"...

461
00:34:28,816 --> 00:34:33,987
The NHS and the welfare state were founded
on the post-war re-evaluation of society.

462
00:34:34,030 --> 00:34:37,074
Which your essay suggests
is some kind of socialist utopia!

463
00:34:37,158 --> 00:34:40,619
I'm just saying, the culture
of dependency it fostered...

464
00:34:40,661 --> 00:34:43,371
Fostered moral citizenship!

465
00:34:43,456 --> 00:34:45,707
Forcing people to pay
for other people's bad choices.

466
00:34:45,792 --> 00:34:47,375
- Or bad luck!
- Gentlemen!

467
00:34:47,460 --> 00:34:51,338
May I suggest, we're straying
into subjective territory.

468
00:34:51,380 --> 00:34:55,050
I'm much less interested in your opinions
than I am in intellectual rigor.

469
00:34:55,134 --> 00:34:57,344
We're historians. Not guests
on Newsnight.

470
00:35:14,570 --> 00:35:16,363
Welcome to the Riot Club.

471
00:35:18,157 --> 00:35:19,699
You fuckers.

472
00:35:19,784 --> 00:35:22,202
You total fuckers.

473
00:35:23,037 --> 00:35:27,207
We aim to please.

474
00:35:27,291 --> 00:35:30,710
Hope you weren't too attached
to your, um, everything.

475
00:35:38,052 --> 00:35:40,345
- Shit! Oh, fuck!
- Miles?

476
00:35:41,764 --> 00:35:44,891
- Oh, my God, have you been burgled?
- No, it's...

477
00:35:47,019 --> 00:35:48,436
Your laptop!

478
00:35:49,730 --> 00:35:50,814
Oh...

479
00:35:54,527 --> 00:35:57,654
Well, I think this means I'm in.

480
00:35:57,738 --> 00:36:00,532
This is what they do to people
they like?

481
00:36:01,617 --> 00:36:04,161
No, I'm just going to clear it up.

482
00:36:04,245 --> 00:36:06,413
Oh, come on, it's just a bit of fun.

483
00:36:06,455 --> 00:36:09,541
- It's tradition.
- These people are not your friends.

484
00:36:09,584 --> 00:36:12,085
- Oh, for fuck's sake, Lauren!
- What?

485
00:36:14,130 --> 00:36:16,590
Well, maybe, you don't like it
cos you don't get to do it.

486
00:36:20,803 --> 00:36:24,139
Fuck! Look, I'm sorry! Lauren!

487
00:36:28,769 --> 00:36:29,769
Jesus.

488
00:36:30,229 --> 00:36:32,606
I just wish I knew whose jizz it was.

489
00:36:32,690 --> 00:36:35,817
Well, it's one for all and all for one.

490
00:36:35,902 --> 00:36:39,905
So, in a way, it's everyone's jizz.

491
00:36:39,947 --> 00:36:42,949
Great, so, you did bukkake on my room.

492
00:36:51,792 --> 00:36:53,376
Proper Riot boy.

493
00:36:54,212 --> 00:36:55,420
Here.

494
00:37:03,471 --> 00:37:06,640
It's actually really hard to get off.
Paper's porous.

495
00:37:06,724 --> 00:37:10,060
You know, in a few years' time, these
boys will be behind some very big desks,

496
00:37:10,144 --> 00:37:11,895
important desks.

497
00:37:11,979 --> 00:37:13,355
You as well.

498
00:37:14,565 --> 00:37:19,819
College is the last time we get to disport
ourselves without anyone watching.

499
00:37:19,904 --> 00:37:23,198
Let's not waste it by being squeamish.

500
00:38:00,695 --> 00:38:03,154
Looks great. Looks classy.

501
00:38:04,198 --> 00:38:07,450
It's a ruby wedding party, Dad,
I don't know if they want classy.

502
00:38:07,535 --> 00:38:09,786
No, this is the Young Entrepreneurs.

503
00:38:09,870 --> 00:38:11,663
- Students? All this?
- Hmm.

504
00:38:12,873 --> 00:38:15,417
Wealthy kids, wealthy parents.

505
00:38:15,501 --> 00:38:17,377
This is a fine dining market.

506
00:38:17,420 --> 00:38:21,339
Yeah, we're a pub, not a Michelin Star.

507
00:38:21,382 --> 00:38:24,926
And do you know how many pubs
are closing every week in this country?

508
00:38:25,428 --> 00:38:27,971
Helen, they need forks
as well as spoons for dessert,

509
00:38:28,055 --> 00:38:29,723
they're not having Fruit Corners.

510
00:38:29,807 --> 00:38:33,852
Posh people say "pudding", Dad,
not "dessert".

511
00:38:33,894 --> 00:38:36,563
No they don't, do they?

512
00:38:39,984 --> 00:38:42,902
- Where did you learn that?
- University?

513
00:38:44,405 --> 00:38:45,905
Must have been.

514
00:38:47,742 --> 00:38:49,502
Don't drink until the president
says you can.

515
00:38:49,577 --> 00:38:50,577
OK.

516
00:38:50,661 --> 00:38:54,289
And absolutely no talk
of religion or politics.

517
00:38:55,458 --> 00:38:59,294
- Is it always this far away?
- Oh, we're banned from anywhere closer.

518
00:39:01,255 --> 00:39:04,591
And the menu is all, like, breast
of chicken wrapped in boring,

519
00:39:04,633 --> 00:39:07,093
so I said to Leighton,
"Mate, let me go off-piste,"

520
00:39:07,178 --> 00:39:09,387
"organize something awesome."

521
00:39:10,014 --> 00:39:11,598
It's great President material.

522
00:39:11,682 --> 00:39:14,100
Fuck, is this restaurant in Wales?

523
00:39:17,229 --> 00:39:20,190
- Better start my campaign, then.
- You?

524
00:39:20,274 --> 00:39:22,484
Election's next term, isn't it?

525
00:39:24,779 --> 00:39:26,179
What, you think I wouldn't be good?

526
00:39:26,781 --> 00:39:29,908
Just didn't think you'd
be going for President.

527
00:39:30,451 --> 00:39:32,452
Is it because I is Greek?

528
00:39:36,540 --> 00:39:38,300
Jesus, Bellingfield,
it's because I'm Greek?

529
00:39:38,334 --> 00:39:41,378
No! No, mate, come on.

530
00:39:41,462 --> 00:39:43,797
- Mate, how long have we been friends?
- Since the first day of school.

531
00:39:43,881 --> 00:39:46,549
And you think I couldn't be
President because I'm Greek?

532
00:39:51,722 --> 00:39:53,807
Oh, my...

533
00:39:55,893 --> 00:39:57,018
Wow!

534
00:39:58,312 --> 00:40:00,480
Hi! George Balfour. Have you...

535
00:40:00,564 --> 00:40:02,273
Is this the 60-80?

536
00:40:03,192 --> 00:40:06,319
Boom! Fucking Reservoir Dogs!

537
00:40:08,322 --> 00:40:10,198
- Evening, chaps.
- Hello, mate.

538
00:40:12,701 --> 00:40:15,495
- What the fuck?
- Mate?

539
00:40:15,579 --> 00:40:19,207
- My fucking tute partner.
- Oh, classic.

540
00:40:20,376 --> 00:40:21,584
- So, Milo?
- Hmm.

541
00:40:21,669 --> 00:40:24,921
Do you know, I don't think I know
a single person called Lauren.

542
00:40:25,005 --> 00:40:26,381
Prolier than thou.

543
00:40:26,465 --> 00:40:28,508
- Lauren what, Lauren who?
- Lauren Small.

544
00:40:28,592 --> 00:40:30,760
- Oh, small, is she?
- Not where it matters.

545
00:40:30,845 --> 00:40:33,430
Actually, she's, she's nice.

546
00:40:34,932 --> 00:40:37,058
Fuck, I thought you were
just being a sex tourist.

547
00:40:37,143 --> 00:40:38,977
Well, what's the point of college
if you can't experiment?

548
00:40:39,019 --> 00:40:41,396
What, you mean "girls for now,
girls for later"?

549
00:40:43,315 --> 00:40:45,984
Yeah, you'll learn, mate.
Girls are for gays.

550
00:40:49,613 --> 00:40:51,364
- Oh, look, it's bloody Leighton!
- Yes, sorry, sorry.

551
00:40:51,449 --> 00:40:52,949
Did you get held up at the nail bar?

552
00:40:53,033 --> 00:40:55,201
Start the party. I am thirsty.

553
00:40:55,244 --> 00:40:57,036
- Showtime, Balf!
- Oh! Oh.

554
00:40:57,121 --> 00:40:58,455
Oh, uh, duty calls.

555
00:40:58,539 --> 00:41:00,373
Bloody nice to meet you.

556
00:41:00,458 --> 00:41:03,710
- Oh, and, uh, good luck with the llamas.
- Oh, thank you.

557
00:41:03,752 --> 00:41:05,378
Hold on, hold on, hold on.

558
00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:09,090
Ready?

559
00:41:13,888 --> 00:41:16,556
Alright, nice and
still, please, gents.

560
00:41:44,376 --> 00:41:45,585
Ah!

561
00:41:45,669 --> 00:41:47,629
Evening, gentlemen. Please do
come through.

562
00:41:47,713 --> 00:41:49,297
Thanks very much.

563
00:41:49,381 --> 00:41:53,343
Thought you'd be in business suits,
more of a pinstripe thing.

564
00:41:53,427 --> 00:41:56,012
- I'm sorry?
- Young Entrepreneurs Club.

565
00:41:56,722 --> 00:41:59,557
- I'm sorry?
- Young Entrepreneurs Club.

566
00:42:00,893 --> 00:42:04,103
Oh, yes, um, it's, uh,
it's a retro night!

567
00:42:16,325 --> 00:42:18,868
OK, we've got three soups...

568
00:42:20,579 --> 00:42:25,208
OK, three soup, one prawn, two parfait,
two no starter, then two salmon,

569
00:42:25,292 --> 00:42:28,294
- one haddock, five chickens.
- Five fucking chicken! Why do we bother?

570
00:42:28,337 --> 00:42:30,296
You're going to get
the lads' starters out first, yeah?

571
00:42:30,339 --> 00:42:34,300
No, we've taken the ruby wedding's order,
we should do them before the penguins.

572
00:42:34,343 --> 00:42:37,720
Private diners need to feel as if
they're being given VIP treatment.

573
00:42:38,514 --> 00:42:41,277
Right, then! Well, good
evening, gentlemen,

574
00:42:41,303 --> 00:42:44,102
and welcome to the Bull's
Head this evening.

575
00:42:44,144 --> 00:42:47,730
Please feel free to sit down
and make yourselves at home.

576
00:42:49,149 --> 00:42:51,484
Can't sit before the president.

577
00:42:58,242 --> 00:43:00,743
Yeah, sit down, sit down.

578
00:43:04,999 --> 00:43:08,585
Well, just a bit of housekeeping
before we serve your dinner,

579
00:43:08,669 --> 00:43:11,504
hoping there's no dietary requirements
we haven't heard about.

580
00:43:11,839 --> 00:43:13,214
I don't eat shit food.

581
00:43:13,299 --> 00:43:14,699
I'm afraid you can't smoke in here,

582
00:43:14,717 --> 00:43:17,594
but if you wish to partake,
please feel free to go outside.

583
00:43:17,678 --> 00:43:20,471
The fire extinguisher
is just over there.

584
00:43:21,015 --> 00:43:23,182
Just hoping we won't
be needing that, eh?

585
00:43:23,225 --> 00:43:27,186
And, um, lavatories are just
through the door where we came in,

586
00:43:27,271 --> 00:43:31,065
so you don't have to go through
the main bar to access the facilities.

587
00:43:31,442 --> 00:43:32,650
May I?

588
00:43:33,944 --> 00:43:36,654
- Wants to be a waitress.
- Sommelier.

589
00:43:48,459 --> 00:43:51,377
Gentlemen, let's start
this again, shall we?

590
00:43:53,464 --> 00:43:54,714
Right.

591
00:43:56,925 --> 00:43:59,469
Now just a bit of housekeeping
to go through...

592
00:43:59,553 --> 00:44:00,720
Boo!

593
00:44:00,804 --> 00:44:05,767
Yes, before we get onto the proper
business of the evening,

594
00:44:05,851 --> 00:44:07,852
getting chateaued beyond belief!

595
00:44:07,895 --> 00:44:09,687
Huzzah! Hear! Hear!

596
00:44:13,275 --> 00:44:14,567
Chunder bag.

597
00:44:17,905 --> 00:44:19,280
It's our time, gentlemen.

598
00:44:21,825 --> 00:44:24,035
Let us eat till we explode,

599
00:44:24,078 --> 00:44:26,412
drink till our eyes fall out,

600
00:44:26,497 --> 00:44:28,915
let us dance footloose upon the Earth,

601
00:44:28,957 --> 00:44:31,167
and carpe some fucking diem!

602
00:44:33,337 --> 00:44:35,713
We who are about to dine, salute you.

603
00:44:38,425 --> 00:44:39,634
Imbibe.

604
00:44:46,183 --> 00:44:47,266
Mmm!

605
00:44:50,396 --> 00:44:54,565
♪ God save our gracious queen

606
00:44:54,608 --> 00:44:58,695
♪ Long live our noble queen

607
00:44:59,655 --> 00:45:02,240
♪ God save the queen

608
00:45:04,368 --> 00:45:08,121
♪ Send her victorious

609
00:45:08,580 --> 00:45:12,291
♪ Happy and glorious

610
00:45:12,668 --> 00:45:16,504
♪ Long to reign over us

611
00:45:16,588 --> 00:45:20,425
♪ God save the queen ♪

612
00:45:29,309 --> 00:45:31,110
Shall we make him a member.

613
00:45:33,188 --> 00:45:34,814
Milo, wine.

614
00:45:50,247 --> 00:45:52,039
Foie gras, mate.

615
00:45:52,124 --> 00:45:54,792
Sorry, do you want yours
wrapped in a vine leaf? It'd be lovely.

616
00:45:54,835 --> 00:45:56,669
This man needs some taramasalata!

617
00:45:56,754 --> 00:45:59,547
I'm sorry, they're just
very excited to be here.

618
00:46:01,049 --> 00:46:04,010
Chanel, Coco Mademoiselle.

619
00:46:05,220 --> 00:46:07,221
Um, yeah. Well done.

620
00:46:09,183 --> 00:46:10,349
Alright, we're going in!

621
00:46:13,771 --> 00:46:18,107
- See, they're nice, aren't they?
- Yeah, alright, they're nice.

622
00:46:18,192 --> 00:46:20,526
I can't see them on The Apprentice,
though.

623
00:46:27,117 --> 00:46:28,201
What?

624
00:46:31,121 --> 00:46:33,623
- She did...
- Villiers, you booked a prozzer?

625
00:46:33,707 --> 00:46:35,416
Stick her under the table, yeah?

626
00:46:35,501 --> 00:46:37,960
- Oh, yeah?
- What? Oh...

627
00:46:38,045 --> 00:46:39,212
Villiers, how grubby!

628
00:46:39,254 --> 00:46:42,089
I asked her to bring a false moustache
for when she does you.

629
00:46:43,050 --> 00:46:44,467
Are you trying to make President?

630
00:46:44,551 --> 00:46:47,053
- I'm just bringing sexy back.
- Villiers, if this gets out...

631
00:46:47,095 --> 00:46:48,846
Worried about your CV, Leighton?

632
00:46:48,889 --> 00:46:50,932
Carpe some diem, didn't you say?

633
00:46:51,016 --> 00:46:53,351
- "We are legends"!
- Never mind.

634
00:46:55,020 --> 00:46:59,690
Mmm and by the way, scrunching Harry
Villiers for sharking the waitress.

635
00:46:59,733 --> 00:47:01,609
Oh, yes!

636
00:47:01,693 --> 00:47:03,528
Oh, my God, that girl is tasty.

637
00:47:03,570 --> 00:47:04,904
- OK, OK.
- Up you get, Villiers.

638
00:47:04,947 --> 00:47:08,241
Scrunch! Scrunch! Scrunch! Scrunch!

639
00:47:14,373 --> 00:47:17,250
- How would you like it cooked?
- Medium rare.

640
00:47:17,751 --> 00:47:19,168
Medium rare!

641
00:47:20,087 --> 00:47:21,888
Is there anything you
can do about the noise?

642
00:47:21,922 --> 00:47:23,047
I'm sorry.

643
00:47:23,090 --> 00:47:25,466
I think they're just enjoying
themselves.

644
00:47:25,551 --> 00:47:26,968
You know, boys...

645
00:47:32,224 --> 00:47:33,558
Excuse me!

646
00:47:37,646 --> 00:47:38,771
Yes.

647
00:47:39,982 --> 00:47:42,358
- Any sign of that parfait?
- It's just coming.

648
00:47:42,442 --> 00:47:46,612
It's just if Mum doesn't eat something
soon, she'll be singing as well.

649
00:47:47,447 --> 00:47:48,948
Alright, chaps, Banbury Toasts
while we're still upright.

650
00:47:49,032 --> 00:47:51,117
- It's fucking cool, man!
- What? What is this?

651
00:47:51,159 --> 00:47:53,619
- Just a game, come on.
- Excuse me, I'm in charge.

652
00:47:54,955 --> 00:47:56,622
OK...

653
00:47:56,665 --> 00:47:58,666
Quiet now, OK, OK...

654
00:48:00,669 --> 00:48:01,919
Quiet!

655
00:48:02,838 --> 00:48:05,798
OK, grasshoppers, here are the rules.

656
00:48:05,883 --> 00:48:10,177
If the word means new person
or some sort of beginner,

657
00:48:10,262 --> 00:48:12,680
you take a shot. Best of five.

658
00:48:21,982 --> 00:48:23,024
Abecedarian!

659
00:48:26,987 --> 00:48:29,697
- Advantage Ryle's.
- Advantage Ryle's. Very good.

660
00:48:29,781 --> 00:48:31,574
- No, it's fine.
- Good work.

661
00:48:31,658 --> 00:48:34,744
- You'll get into the swing of it.
- You've done it.

662
00:48:34,828 --> 00:48:36,829
Don't. Get away from me.

663
00:48:41,585 --> 00:48:42,960
Whoo! Novitiate.

664
00:48:43,837 --> 00:48:45,504
Come on! Come on!

665
00:48:46,673 --> 00:48:47,673
Richards!

666
00:48:49,885 --> 00:48:51,594
- Milo! Milo.
- He's back in this.

667
00:48:52,596 --> 00:48:54,680
Here.

668
00:49:02,230 --> 00:49:03,564
Neologism!

669
00:49:05,901 --> 00:49:08,152
What? He said "gism".

670
00:49:09,071 --> 00:49:10,696
OK, OK, OK!

671
00:49:15,786 --> 00:49:16,994
Whippersnapper!

672
00:49:17,037 --> 00:49:19,538
Go! Go! Go! Go!

673
00:49:19,581 --> 00:49:21,374
Draw! That's neck in neck, it's a draw.

674
00:49:22,709 --> 00:49:24,543
- This is fantastic!
- Next round.

675
00:49:24,628 --> 00:49:26,212
OK, OK, OK, come on.

676
00:49:26,296 --> 00:49:28,839
Didn't I say? Come on,
fight it, fight it.

677
00:49:28,882 --> 00:49:31,092
- Come on!
- Fight it!

678
00:49:32,177 --> 00:49:33,386
Shh!

679
00:49:42,688 --> 00:49:43,688
Catechumen!

680
00:49:44,606 --> 00:49:47,483
Go! Go! Go! Go!

681
00:49:47,567 --> 00:49:49,568
That's Richards! We have a winner!

682
00:49:52,322 --> 00:49:54,198
Come on, mate, come on.

683
00:49:55,826 --> 00:49:58,703
Did you see? That was brilliant!

684
00:49:58,745 --> 00:50:00,871
Really brilliant, honestly.

685
00:50:03,083 --> 00:50:05,251
Three shots, mate!

686
00:50:14,428 --> 00:50:16,095
Alright, shh!

687
00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:26,188
Raise your glasses
to Lord Riot and the dead members.

688
00:50:26,732 --> 00:50:28,482
Dead members!

689
00:50:30,318 --> 00:50:32,028
You've got a dead member,
haven't you, Bell-end?

690
00:50:32,112 --> 00:50:34,864
Only cos your mum's
been sitting on it 24/7.

691
00:50:37,034 --> 00:50:39,994
Once more unto the drink,
dear friends.

692
00:50:40,078 --> 00:50:44,248
Once more! And give a roar
for all our English drunk.

693
00:50:48,879 --> 00:50:51,714
On, on you noblest Riot,

694
00:50:51,798 --> 00:50:55,468
whose blood is fed from vodka 80 proof!

695
00:50:55,552 --> 00:50:59,180
Be envy now to clubs of weaker blood.

696
00:50:59,264 --> 00:51:01,390
And teach them how to drink.

697
00:51:03,852 --> 00:51:05,519
The game's afoot!

698
00:51:06,188 --> 00:51:08,064
Pour out your spirits,

699
00:51:08,148 --> 00:51:10,649
and with glasses charged,

700
00:51:10,692 --> 00:51:13,986
Cry, "God for Harry",

701
00:51:14,029 --> 00:51:16,989
"Dimitri and Alistair,"

702
00:51:17,074 --> 00:51:21,118
"James, Toby, Edward, Milo,"

703
00:51:21,161 --> 00:51:24,080
"Hugo, Guy and George!"

704
00:51:28,001 --> 00:51:30,628
Plates, please, quick, quick, quick!

705
00:51:32,547 --> 00:51:35,049
Size of that. Let's get a photo, yeah?

706
00:51:42,057 --> 00:51:44,809
Oh, my Christ! That's
a very big chicken.

707
00:51:44,851 --> 00:51:48,187
That, gentlemen, is a 10 bird roast.

708
00:51:48,271 --> 00:51:49,522
- Well, it's not actually...
- Good man.

709
00:51:49,564 --> 00:51:51,023
What is a 10 bird roast?

710
00:51:51,108 --> 00:51:52,650
- Porn?
- Exactly what it says,

711
00:51:52,692 --> 00:51:56,779
a bird inside a bird inside a bird
inside a bird etcetera...

712
00:51:56,863 --> 00:51:59,824
- We did have a tiny problem with...
- Bellingfield, it's amazing!

713
00:51:59,866 --> 00:52:02,243
- It's amazing!
- Bravo, mate. Good work.

714
00:52:02,327 --> 00:52:04,537
- What's pudding going to be?
- A 10 trifle, trifle?

715
00:52:04,579 --> 00:52:06,455
Ten cake, cake.

716
00:52:07,874 --> 00:52:10,042
Great! Who wants to do the honors?

717
00:52:10,127 --> 00:52:12,253
How about I do it with this.

718
00:52:12,337 --> 00:52:14,463
- Oh, Milo!
- Milo!

719
00:52:18,301 --> 00:52:19,552
Yes, Milo!

720
00:52:22,931 --> 00:52:25,391
Oh, I love a roast potato! I love them!

721
00:52:28,186 --> 00:52:29,770
Absolutely disgraceful.

722
00:52:35,777 --> 00:52:37,444
Why 10 birds specifically?

723
00:52:38,113 --> 00:52:40,573
Because there's 10 of us.

724
00:52:41,908 --> 00:52:46,328
Ten birds bound in the heat
of the fire into one entity,

725
00:52:46,413 --> 00:52:48,414
i.e. the club.

726
00:52:48,456 --> 00:52:50,541
- What birds is it?
- Must be something tiny in the middle.

727
00:52:50,584 --> 00:52:52,835
- A tiny shrew?
- Birds, you wad.

728
00:52:54,963 --> 00:52:57,173
- Duckling?
- No, that's not a bird.

729
00:52:57,257 --> 00:52:59,175
I think it's a budgerigar.

730
00:52:59,885 --> 00:53:02,052
- Poussin? Woodcock.
- Oh, no, woodcock are tiny.

731
00:53:02,095 --> 00:53:03,216
They'd be a bugger to shoot.

732
00:53:03,221 --> 00:53:05,556
So that woodcock's been inside
more birds than Villiers.

733
00:53:05,599 --> 00:53:07,600
Nine? Nine squared, mate.

734
00:53:17,402 --> 00:53:20,279
- Seriously, what birds is it?
- Dims, OK.

735
00:53:20,363 --> 00:53:22,531
Uh, woodcock.

736
00:53:23,033 --> 00:53:25,451
Uh, duck, chicken, goose.

737
00:53:25,493 --> 00:53:29,038
Guinea fowl, quail, partridge,
turkey, pigeon, pheasant.

738
00:53:29,122 --> 00:53:30,789
Ten birds.

739
00:53:30,874 --> 00:53:33,709
There's no guinea fowl in here.

740
00:53:33,793 --> 00:53:34,960
What?

741
00:53:35,962 --> 00:53:38,464
Dad, they won't notice, will they?

742
00:53:38,548 --> 00:53:40,216
Just couldn't get hold
of a guinea fowl this week.

743
00:53:40,300 --> 00:53:43,093
I mean, maybe we should
change suppliers.

744
00:53:43,136 --> 00:53:44,637
- Table eight away.
- The amount they've drunk,

745
00:53:44,679 --> 00:53:47,473
we could have given them
chicken nuggets.

746
00:53:48,183 --> 00:53:49,934
I did try to tell them.

747
00:53:50,644 --> 00:53:52,811
Unless

748
00:53:52,896 --> 00:53:57,066
there was, like, a blue tit
smashed up in the stuffing.

749
00:53:59,486 --> 00:54:03,072
- Nine fucking birds!
- Mate, I hate broccoli.

750
00:54:03,156 --> 00:54:06,450
- Did he tell you?
- No, he fucking didn't!

751
00:54:06,493 --> 00:54:09,745
- Come on, guys, it's still pretty cool.
- It's delicious!

752
00:54:09,829 --> 00:54:11,664
Are we going to complain?

753
00:54:31,393 --> 00:54:35,312
It's just that when we arrange something,
we expect to get it.

754
00:54:38,275 --> 00:54:40,484
OK, is anyone still hungry?

755
00:54:41,278 --> 00:54:44,238
- Cos I could make you an omelette.
- No, no, sorry.

756
00:54:44,322 --> 00:54:45,447
Rachel, I don't think you understand,

757
00:54:45,532 --> 00:54:47,950
these chaps have eaten in some of the
finest restaurants in the country.

758
00:54:48,034 --> 00:54:50,703
- The world, mate.
- What are you doing in Kidsbury, then?

759
00:54:52,414 --> 00:54:53,314
I'm sorry, what?

760
00:54:53,340 --> 00:54:56,150
You might want to keep
the noise down a bit.

761
00:55:01,298 --> 00:55:03,090
Well, that could have gone better.

762
00:55:07,679 --> 00:55:10,014
- Oh, well, there goes the neighbourhood...
- What?

763
00:55:10,974 --> 00:55:13,225
She went to school with my sister
and now she's

764
00:55:14,352 --> 00:55:15,853
a sex worker.

765
00:55:24,029 --> 00:55:28,073
Thank you, but we'd prefer it if
you took your business elsewhere.

766
00:55:29,451 --> 00:55:32,036
- Leighton got totally fucking rinsed.
- No, I didn't.

767
00:55:32,078 --> 00:55:33,746
It's really not that important, is it?

768
00:55:33,788 --> 00:55:35,539
It's important we get what we want.

769
00:55:35,582 --> 00:55:37,458
Yes, thank you, Ryle.

770
00:55:52,432 --> 00:55:54,975
Gentlemen, it's cock o'clock.

771
00:55:56,144 --> 00:55:58,937
Yes! Yes, brilliant.

772
00:55:59,814 --> 00:56:02,608
Harry, tell her, I've got my cock
out ready for her.

773
00:56:05,445 --> 00:56:08,113
Oh, no, no. There's a fire exit.

774
00:56:08,198 --> 00:56:10,449
Go round the back. Yeah, yeah.

775
00:56:26,299 --> 00:56:27,549
Please, come through.

776
00:56:27,634 --> 00:56:29,802
- After you.
- Thank you, Harry.

777
00:56:30,428 --> 00:56:31,470
Ah!

778
00:56:32,055 --> 00:56:33,639
Well, this is Charlie.

779
00:56:33,681 --> 00:56:35,474
She's a...

780
00:56:35,517 --> 00:56:38,227
What do you say? A call girl?

781
00:56:38,311 --> 00:56:40,938
- Oh, an escort actually these days.
- Escort.

782
00:56:42,941 --> 00:56:44,441
Oh, thank you.

783
00:56:47,028 --> 00:56:50,030
Um, you've got a room, have you?

784
00:56:55,662 --> 00:56:57,162
Um, where are the others going to go?

785
00:56:57,247 --> 00:56:59,748
Oh, no, no, they'll be here.
Around the table.

786
00:57:00,250 --> 00:57:02,626
- Right?
- And you, well,

787
00:57:03,920 --> 00:57:05,712
you, under the table.

788
00:57:06,297 --> 00:57:08,006
What am I doing under the table?

789
00:57:09,175 --> 00:57:11,468
Um, us. One at a time.

790
00:57:11,845 --> 00:57:14,012
- Maybe three at a time.
- Mate.

791
00:57:14,097 --> 00:57:16,723
Well, she's got two
hands, hasn't she? So...

792
00:57:18,435 --> 00:57:20,644
You're talking about oral?

793
00:57:22,397 --> 00:57:24,022
On all of you?

794
00:57:24,107 --> 00:57:26,191
We'd give you a cushion for your knees.

795
00:57:26,234 --> 00:57:28,694
Yeah, um...

796
00:57:28,778 --> 00:57:29,862
I think there's been...

797
00:57:31,156 --> 00:57:32,781
- Chris?
- Dad?

798
00:57:32,866 --> 00:57:34,616
Hang on there, Rach. Chris?

799
00:57:34,701 --> 00:57:37,202
Rachel needs you out front,
table 12 is kicking off.

800
00:57:37,245 --> 00:57:38,328
Yeah.

801
00:57:39,372 --> 00:57:42,040
I do a more classy sort of service.

802
00:57:42,125 --> 00:57:48,797
You know, like a date, only I don't call
in the morning. Dinner, conversation...

803
00:57:48,882 --> 00:57:52,384
Yeah, we wanted to pick
your brains about fiscal policy.

804
00:57:53,344 --> 00:57:57,556
Um, did the agency not say that
extras had to be agreed in advance?

805
00:57:57,640 --> 00:57:59,975
I thought he was asking
if I wanted more than one girl.

806
00:58:00,059 --> 00:58:01,894
They throw these fucking
euphemisms at you.

807
00:58:01,978 --> 00:58:03,061
Villiers.

808
00:58:06,274 --> 00:58:08,567
Listen, Charlie,

809
00:58:08,651 --> 00:58:10,903
I'm sure we can work something out,
can't we?

810
00:58:10,987 --> 00:58:13,655
A considerably bigger fee,
which the agency needn't know about?

811
00:58:13,740 --> 00:58:15,532
Oh, I don't do anything off the books.

812
00:58:15,575 --> 00:58:18,827
Sorry, I'm trying to be a gentleman here,
but I'm actually really fucked off.

813
00:58:18,912 --> 00:58:22,080
OK, isn't she just the wrong kind of...
A different kind of...

814
00:58:22,123 --> 00:58:23,707
Don't, Richards!

815
00:58:23,750 --> 00:58:26,877
You might be happy
being pussy-whipped, but I'm not.

816
00:58:27,253 --> 00:58:28,587
OK, mate.

817
00:58:30,340 --> 00:58:32,591
Look, I promised these boys
they'll get a blow job tonight,

818
00:58:32,634 --> 00:58:35,552
if you don't do it, then
I look like a cunt.

819
00:58:38,389 --> 00:58:39,681
I'm really sorry,

820
00:58:39,766 --> 00:58:43,393
but I don't do more than two visits
in a row without a break, so...

821
00:58:43,436 --> 00:58:45,270
What break do you need
if you're just lying there?

822
00:58:45,355 --> 00:58:48,148
I'm not just a live version
of the sock you wank into.

823
00:58:48,733 --> 00:58:50,567
I'm not sure you quite appreciate
who you're talking to.

824
00:58:50,610 --> 00:58:53,010
Do it yourself, you'll be under
the table, a mouth's a mouth.

825
00:58:54,155 --> 00:58:56,615
Why can't you just fucking do it?

826
00:58:57,408 --> 00:58:59,535
Why can't you just buckle down and...

827
00:58:59,619 --> 00:59:01,328
Oh, for fuck's sake, you're a whore.

828
00:59:08,962 --> 00:59:11,672
Right, I think I'm going now, aren't I?

829
00:59:16,135 --> 00:59:17,469
Toodle pip!

830
00:59:25,895 --> 00:59:27,271
Fuck!

831
00:59:27,313 --> 00:59:30,524
Do understand, sir,
we've been short-staffed this evening

832
00:59:30,608 --> 00:59:32,765
and your order got
caught in a bottleneck.

833
00:59:32,791 --> 00:59:34,094
What about the noise?

834
00:59:35,780 --> 00:59:39,324
- We could try and find you another table.
- We're leaving.

835
00:59:40,493 --> 00:59:44,663
I don't suppose you want to settle up
for your drinks and starters?

836
00:59:44,747 --> 00:59:47,332
I am trying to run a
family restaurant here.

837
00:59:47,417 --> 00:59:49,001
Gastro pub.

838
00:59:49,043 --> 00:59:52,337
You might like that sort of thing,

839
00:59:52,380 --> 00:59:54,840
I find it extremely offensive.

840
00:59:54,882 --> 00:59:56,508
Notwithstanding, it's against the law...

841
00:59:56,551 --> 00:59:58,510
Let's not get into the legality of this.

842
00:59:58,553 --> 01:00:01,179
I've just had a table of four
leave before their mains,

843
01:00:01,222 --> 01:00:03,640
refusing to pay the bill
because of the noise.

844
01:00:03,683 --> 01:00:05,017
Yeah, I'm sorry.

845
01:00:05,101 --> 01:00:06,602
We're very, very sorry.

846
01:00:06,686 --> 01:00:08,979
I think it's time for you
to leave, please.

847
01:00:09,022 --> 01:00:11,189
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

848
01:00:11,232 --> 01:00:12,524
We're ever so sorry.

849
01:00:12,567 --> 01:00:15,777
Most of us went to boarding school,
we don't really know any women.

850
01:00:17,697 --> 01:00:19,197
I'd like you to leave.

851
01:00:20,700 --> 01:00:22,534
How much was the bill?

852
01:00:25,371 --> 01:00:26,538
For the table who left?

853
01:00:28,916 --> 01:00:32,544
Um, maybe, £100 by the end of the night.

854
01:00:33,379 --> 01:00:36,548
- And we're spending what tonight?
- Ryle, just...

855
01:00:37,050 --> 01:00:38,550
We're spending what tonight?

856
01:00:40,637 --> 01:00:42,179
About three and a half grand, I think.

857
01:00:44,891 --> 01:00:47,517
It's not just about the money,

858
01:00:47,560 --> 01:00:49,686
it's about goodwill,

859
01:00:49,729 --> 01:00:51,563
these people are my customers.

860
01:00:51,606 --> 01:00:52,731
OK.

861
01:00:53,608 --> 01:00:55,776
Gesture of goodwill.

862
01:00:55,860 --> 01:00:59,488
We'll, um, we'll call it 150, alright?

863
01:00:59,572 --> 01:01:01,573
Let's say they were going
to order another bottle.

864
01:01:01,616 --> 01:01:04,326
We wouldn't want you
to be out of pocket.

865
01:01:04,410 --> 01:01:05,619
Exactly.

866
01:01:14,796 --> 01:01:17,422
This is what they teach you
at boarding school, is it?

867
01:01:25,264 --> 01:01:27,474
Actually, yeah, it is.

868
01:01:47,495 --> 01:01:49,121
Here we go.

869
01:01:50,456 --> 01:01:51,623
Lovely!

870
01:02:20,069 --> 01:02:22,821
I thought you were going
to chuck them out.

871
01:02:22,864 --> 01:02:24,906
We came to an arrangement.

872
01:02:27,994 --> 01:02:30,537
Did you let them pay you off?

873
01:02:30,621 --> 01:02:34,583
Alright, so, I let them reimburse me
for a table that we lost.

874
01:02:34,667 --> 01:02:37,187
What? Would you rather that I just
didn't take money off people?

875
01:02:38,171 --> 01:02:40,297
I'm still paying off
your student loan, you know.

876
01:02:40,339 --> 01:02:42,299
- Dad...
- Look, Rachel, if you've got comments,

877
01:02:42,341 --> 01:02:45,302
just save them for after
service, alright?

878
01:02:48,514 --> 01:02:51,016
Michael, I'll be behind
the bar if you need me.

879
01:02:52,685 --> 01:02:55,270
"Is that what they teach you
at boarding school?"

880
01:02:55,354 --> 01:02:57,731
I know. Knob-jockey.

881
01:02:57,815 --> 01:02:59,483
Come on. You offered him a deal,
he took it, what's the...

882
01:02:59,525 --> 01:03:01,818
Yeah, but he keeps the moral
high ground.

883
01:03:02,195 --> 01:03:05,447
What about, don't take the money
if you feel that fucking strongly?

884
01:03:05,907 --> 01:03:08,158
Or what about, take the money,
but shut the fuck up?

885
01:03:08,201 --> 01:03:10,869
Ryle, you're a fucking legend.

886
01:03:10,953 --> 01:03:13,330
And her, right, Charlie,

887
01:03:13,372 --> 01:03:15,332
you're a prostitute,
love, get on your knees.

888
01:03:15,374 --> 01:03:17,292
Fuck ya!

889
01:03:17,376 --> 01:03:21,797
I mean, are we just going to sit here
and take it, carry on taking it?

890
01:03:22,799 --> 01:03:25,801
- We're all going to come out of college...
- Which we worked fucking hard for.

891
01:03:25,885 --> 01:03:30,138
And there's going to be no country left
for us because of people like him.

892
01:03:30,223 --> 01:03:33,183
Oh, come on, that's a bit
of a hard line position, isn't it?

893
01:03:34,185 --> 01:03:35,393
We never use those.

894
01:03:38,231 --> 01:03:39,231
Buon appetito!

895
01:03:40,942 --> 01:03:43,860
OK, join it up, shall we?

896
01:03:43,903 --> 01:03:49,115
So, OK, they want all the stuff,
nice car, massive telly,

897
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:52,786
so they borrow more than
they can ever afford to pay back.

898
01:03:52,870 --> 01:03:54,746
- Yeah.
- Then, when the great New Labor

899
01:03:54,789 --> 01:03:58,834
shop in the sky goes up in flames,
they vote us back in to sort it out.

900
01:03:59,460 --> 01:04:02,921
Sounding a lot like a conversation
about politics here, can I just say?

901
01:04:03,005 --> 01:04:05,632
State of the world, mate.
Everything's political.

902
01:04:05,716 --> 01:04:07,759
- I'm here for the wine and the jokes.
- Hear, hear.

903
01:04:08,553 --> 01:04:10,762
Cos you've got no heritage, that's why.

904
01:04:10,805 --> 01:04:13,515
- I've got a boatload of heritage.
- No, mate, you've got a boat.

905
01:04:16,102 --> 01:04:17,811
Fuck you, Bellingfield.

906
01:04:17,895 --> 01:04:19,646
You know, they're obsessed...

907
01:04:19,730 --> 01:04:23,483
- They're obsessed with upward mobility.
- Absolutely.

908
01:04:23,568 --> 01:04:26,945
Don't understand why it doesn't
all just get handed to them.

909
01:04:27,029 --> 01:04:28,989
- Mate.
- No, fuck you.

910
01:04:29,073 --> 01:04:32,617
- Does anyone not want their pudding?
- Is that why they're all so bitter?

911
01:04:32,660 --> 01:04:36,580
I can't help who my father is, but every
fucking internship interview it comes up,

912
01:04:36,622 --> 01:04:40,750
as if I haven't worked,
as if I don't work my fucking ass off!

913
01:04:41,794 --> 01:04:44,129
- It's just them and us all over again.
- Yes!

914
01:04:44,213 --> 01:04:46,840
No, it's not. It's not at all.
It's not them and us.

915
01:04:46,924 --> 01:04:49,593
In our village pub, we drink
with everyone.

916
01:04:50,344 --> 01:04:52,220
People who work in the estate, farmers.

917
01:04:52,305 --> 01:04:54,264
- Who buys the drinks?
- Sorry?

918
01:04:54,307 --> 01:04:55,557
Who pays for the drinks?

919
01:04:57,184 --> 01:04:58,184
Well, I do.

920
01:04:59,896 --> 01:05:03,189
You think they don't laugh at you
when you're not there?

921
01:05:06,527 --> 01:05:08,403
George, they hate you.

922
01:05:10,072 --> 01:05:12,866
Fuck! Oh, that's nice.

923
01:05:13,492 --> 01:05:15,160
All I need now is a blo-jo.

924
01:05:15,244 --> 01:05:18,204
Maybe we should just try and

925
01:05:18,289 --> 01:05:20,916
find a way to, uh, co-exist.

926
01:05:22,418 --> 01:05:28,006
Mate, just cos you're doing field research
doesn't mean the rest of us want to.

927
01:05:29,634 --> 01:05:31,051
We apologise.

928
01:05:32,178 --> 01:05:34,846
We apologise for being who we are.

929
01:05:35,514 --> 01:05:38,850
We pretend we're the same,
we do it to ourselves, yeah?

930
01:05:38,893 --> 01:05:41,853
We need to stop apologizing.

931
01:05:41,896 --> 01:05:44,105
Cos it's only going to get worse.

932
01:05:44,190 --> 01:05:46,650
Shit! Um, lose it, lose the coke.

933
01:05:48,486 --> 01:05:49,694
Um, yep.

934
01:05:52,615 --> 01:05:54,366
- Hi.
- Fuck!

935
01:05:58,204 --> 01:06:00,288
What are you, uh, sorry, hi...

936
01:06:00,373 --> 01:06:02,133
Um, what are you... What
are you doing here?

937
01:06:03,334 --> 01:06:05,710
You texted me?
You asked me to come.

938
01:06:06,754 --> 01:06:09,756
- No, I didn't.
- Yeah, you texted me.

939
01:06:10,257 --> 01:06:11,383
Sorry, who are you?

940
01:06:12,051 --> 01:06:13,343
Oh, it's Miles' girlfriend.

941
01:06:13,386 --> 01:06:15,804
- Lauren Small!
- I didn't text you.

942
01:06:16,847 --> 01:06:18,848
No, I didn't fucking text her!
I didn't text you.

943
01:06:18,891 --> 01:06:22,102
Presumably, we could sort this out
quite easily by seeing the text?

944
01:06:22,186 --> 01:06:24,354
Oh, yeah, absolutely. Very good point.

945
01:06:24,730 --> 01:06:26,773
Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!

946
01:06:26,857 --> 01:06:29,442
- Jesus, just look at mine.
- Thank you.

947
01:06:31,612 --> 01:06:32,904
Lauren...

948
01:06:36,283 --> 01:06:38,410
"I need you to rescue me."

949
01:06:39,370 --> 01:06:43,665
"Can you put on a dress and come
to the Bull's Head, Kidsbury?"

950
01:06:43,749 --> 01:06:45,792
"Kiss, kiss, kiss, Miles."

951
01:06:45,876 --> 01:06:50,088
Honestly, some fuckwit has
nicked my phone and texted you.

952
01:06:50,131 --> 01:06:52,799
You said you needed me and I came.

953
01:06:54,468 --> 01:06:56,428
I think that makes me a nice person.

954
01:06:56,470 --> 01:06:58,304
It does, it does, you know.

955
01:06:58,389 --> 01:07:00,515
Excuse me, sorry, excuse me.

956
01:07:00,975 --> 01:07:02,142
Um...

957
01:07:02,810 --> 01:07:06,855
Uh, I'm sorry, Lauren.
But this is a mistake. So...

958
01:07:06,939 --> 01:07:08,231
I think I'm gonna put you in a taxi...

959
01:07:08,274 --> 01:07:10,984
No, no, no, she's only just arrived.
Where are your manners, Milo?

960
01:07:11,068 --> 01:07:14,279
- Harry...
- Seriously, calm down, sit down.

961
01:07:14,363 --> 01:07:17,115
Lauren, please, have a drink.

962
01:07:18,534 --> 01:07:19,743
Here.

963
01:07:25,875 --> 01:07:27,751
Oh, this is nice.

964
01:07:27,793 --> 01:07:29,461
So, now, Lauren,

965
01:07:30,796 --> 01:07:33,590
my friend here has a question for you.

966
01:07:36,886 --> 01:07:37,969
Hi.

967
01:07:39,930 --> 01:07:41,473
Hello!

968
01:07:44,435 --> 01:07:47,353
How would you like to make £300 tonight?

969
01:07:55,321 --> 01:07:56,571
What?

970
01:07:56,655 --> 01:07:59,699
Oh, my God, is he going to ask her?
Legend.

971
01:07:59,784 --> 01:08:00,909
You see...

972
01:08:03,704 --> 01:08:05,830
We had this...

973
01:08:05,915 --> 01:08:09,834
We had this lady friend, um, boo,

974
01:08:10,628 --> 01:08:12,253
the landlord sent her away.

975
01:08:12,338 --> 01:08:15,131
- Guys, please, don't...
- What sort of lady friend?

976
01:08:15,174 --> 01:08:17,550
- Service industry.
- Just a few blow jobs.

977
01:08:18,260 --> 01:08:20,964
OK, it's my girlfriend,
can you just stop?

978
01:08:20,990 --> 01:08:22,372
Oh, sorry, sorry.

979
01:08:23,015 --> 01:08:26,518
I didn't realise you were,
you know, exclusive.

980
01:08:27,686 --> 01:08:29,687
What was it you said earlier?

981
01:08:31,524 --> 01:08:33,942
"Girls for now, girls for later."

982
01:08:37,279 --> 01:08:38,863
- I didn't say that.
- Yes, you did.

983
01:08:38,948 --> 01:08:41,658
I didn't say that! I didn't say it!

984
01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:46,579
Chaps, chaps.

985
01:08:47,331 --> 01:08:50,125
I think that's a bit insulting
to Lauren, actually.

986
01:08:55,047 --> 01:08:56,464
Three hundred quid?

987
01:08:56,549 --> 01:09:01,094
No, no, surely it should be something
that actually makes a difference?

988
01:09:01,178 --> 01:09:03,638
- Like, um...
- Dimitri, please.

989
01:09:05,099 --> 01:09:06,391
Twenty-seven grand?

990
01:09:09,270 --> 01:09:10,603
What?

991
01:09:11,063 --> 01:09:12,397
It's three years' tuition fees.

992
01:09:14,150 --> 01:09:15,733
Just for a few blow jobs.

993
01:09:16,485 --> 01:09:17,902
Spicy.

994
01:09:21,615 --> 01:09:23,241
I'm serious.

995
01:09:23,325 --> 01:09:27,078
Give me your account number,
I will do a transfer right now.

996
01:09:29,123 --> 01:09:30,290
Miles?

997
01:09:32,293 --> 01:09:34,085
- I, um...
- Yeah?

998
01:09:48,767 --> 01:09:49,809
It's up to you.

999
01:09:50,978 --> 01:09:51,978
Sorry?

1000
01:09:53,147 --> 01:09:56,024
No, no, no, you're right...

1001
01:09:56,108 --> 01:09:57,275
It's up to me?

1002
01:09:57,359 --> 01:10:00,987
No, no, no, I'm sorry,
I just thought for a second,

1003
01:10:01,071 --> 01:10:03,364
for a moment, I just thought
it's a fuckload of money.

1004
01:10:03,449 --> 01:10:05,408
What, and I'm the sort of scrubber
who'd take it?

1005
01:10:05,451 --> 01:10:08,661
No, no, I didn't think
it was my decision to make.

1006
01:10:09,580 --> 01:10:11,289
Um, can I get you a taxi?

1007
01:10:15,878 --> 01:10:18,087
- Can you let me out, please?
- What is it, Lauren?

1008
01:10:18,130 --> 01:10:19,631
You're too good for us?

1009
01:10:19,673 --> 01:10:21,591
We've got the finest sperm
in the country in this room,

1010
01:10:21,634 --> 01:10:23,468
you should be paying us
to let you drink it.

1011
01:10:23,552 --> 01:10:25,386
What are you saying? What are you doing?

1012
01:10:25,471 --> 01:10:27,180
Whoa, whoa, jokes. Lauren...

1013
01:10:28,641 --> 01:10:29,641
Jokes.

1014
01:10:31,810 --> 01:10:34,145
Do you not do humor at state school?

1015
01:10:34,647 --> 01:10:35,647
What?

1016
01:10:36,190 --> 01:10:39,025
You think we'd touch you
with a bargepole?

1017
01:10:39,777 --> 01:10:41,611
Wouldn't fuck her with a bargepole.

1018
01:10:41,904 --> 01:10:43,529
That is fucking offensive.

1019
01:10:45,491 --> 01:10:46,866
Let her out, guys.

1020
01:10:46,951 --> 01:10:47,951
Let her out.

1021
01:10:49,662 --> 01:10:51,663
Oh, no, sorry, it's, uh, it's pull.

1022
01:10:52,498 --> 01:10:53,998
Stop it.

1023
01:10:54,625 --> 01:10:56,209
For fuck's sake, stop it.

1024
01:11:00,506 --> 01:11:01,506
Anyone else?

1025
01:11:07,054 --> 01:11:08,554
Lauren!

1026
01:11:09,056 --> 01:11:10,181
Lauren.

1027
01:11:27,032 --> 01:11:28,700
You're wasted, you're wasted.

1028
01:12:07,573 --> 01:12:08,906
Rach...

1029
01:12:09,491 --> 01:12:10,575
Rachel.

1030
01:12:12,077 --> 01:12:14,829
We'll talk about it in the morning, Dad.

1031
01:12:25,716 --> 01:12:27,508
Go help yourself to a pint if you want.

1032
01:12:27,593 --> 01:12:29,969
Best get back, thanks,
the little one's teething.

1033
01:12:31,388 --> 01:12:33,028
Unless you need help
handling those lads.

1034
01:12:33,098 --> 01:12:35,892
What? No. I'll be fine.

1035
01:12:36,769 --> 01:12:38,353
Go on, get home.

1036
01:12:39,188 --> 01:12:40,188
See ya.

1037
01:12:42,858 --> 01:12:44,359
Go on, Paul, I'll empty that.

1038
01:12:46,070 --> 01:12:47,987
- See you on Monday.
- See ya.

1039
01:12:54,703 --> 01:13:00,375
While you're under
my roof, you'll respect my rules.

1040
01:13:02,044 --> 01:13:04,370
Well, I've got a new
rule for you, mate,

1041
01:13:04,396 --> 01:13:06,923
it's called "Fuck you,
we're the Riot Club".

1042
01:13:08,258 --> 01:13:12,678
This bourgeois outrage when
we do anything, say anything.

1043
01:13:12,763 --> 01:13:15,473
Anything we ever build or achieve,

1044
01:13:15,557 --> 01:13:19,394
anything with the slightest whiff
of magnificence,

1045
01:13:19,478 --> 01:13:22,188
how did they get everywhere,

1046
01:13:22,272 --> 01:13:25,566
how did they make everything
so fucking second-rate?

1047
01:13:27,444 --> 01:13:31,030
Thinking they're better
because there's more of them.

1048
01:13:31,115 --> 01:13:33,658
That's not sweat on their palms,

1049
01:13:33,742 --> 01:13:36,327
it's envy, it's resentment.

1050
01:13:37,162 --> 01:13:39,163
And it stinks like a fucking drain.

1051
01:13:39,248 --> 01:13:40,289
- Hear, hear.
- That's right.

1052
01:13:40,332 --> 01:13:45,002
I am sick to fucking death
of poor people.

1053
01:13:45,087 --> 01:13:46,671
Yeah, fucking yes.

1054
01:13:55,055 --> 01:13:57,014
Lauren? It's me.

1055
01:13:58,100 --> 01:13:59,851
Please call me back.

1056
01:14:01,687 --> 01:14:03,771
I'm really...

1057
01:14:07,693 --> 01:14:10,153
I thought you'd gone.

1058
01:14:10,195 --> 01:14:13,865
Was it you that texted her?

1059
01:14:15,659 --> 01:14:16,659
Of course not.

1060
01:14:20,747 --> 01:14:24,709
Whatever thing it is you have
for me, you need to fucking...

1061
01:14:24,751 --> 01:14:27,378
- I'm straight, yeah?
- Yeah, I got that.

1062
01:14:27,963 --> 01:14:30,214
I'm not your fucking rent boy.

1063
01:14:33,427 --> 01:14:35,553
No one forced you into this.

1064
01:14:36,722 --> 01:14:38,389
You wanted to come.

1065
01:14:47,399 --> 01:14:49,233
Come on, boys, back to the trenches.

1066
01:14:49,318 --> 01:14:51,068
Come on, Milo, Milo.

1067
01:17:18,091 --> 01:17:21,719
I can't hear enough smashing.
More smash, more trashing.

1068
01:17:40,072 --> 01:17:41,405
Oh, Jesus.

1069
01:17:45,702 --> 01:17:46,827
Jesus Christ.

1070
01:17:49,915 --> 01:17:51,248
What have you done?

1071
01:17:57,714 --> 01:17:59,590
You've broken my bulls.

1072
01:18:04,513 --> 01:18:07,932
- What the hell are you doing?
- No, no, no, don't worry.

1073
01:18:08,016 --> 01:18:10,935
- Don't worry?
- We're going to pay you, we always pay.

1074
01:18:11,019 --> 01:18:13,479
What gave you the right...

1075
01:18:13,563 --> 01:18:14,814
Oh, sit down.

1076
01:18:19,611 --> 01:18:21,028
Take the knife off him.

1077
01:18:22,698 --> 01:18:26,617
Chaps, let's all be gentlemen, shall we?

1078
01:18:26,702 --> 01:18:29,453
Shut up and listen.

1079
01:18:29,538 --> 01:18:34,750
Now, this, this is how it works.
You go back out there quietly,

1080
01:18:34,793 --> 01:18:37,294
we do this and we pay you
very generously.

1081
01:18:41,633 --> 01:18:43,342
People let you do this?

1082
01:18:44,052 --> 01:18:46,929
Most people are smart enough
to take the treats and shut up.

1083
01:18:46,972 --> 01:18:48,973
I don't want your money.

1084
01:18:55,731 --> 01:18:59,734
Then what are you trying to do
with this tawdry little cum-shack?

1085
01:19:01,528 --> 01:19:03,070
People like you

1086
01:19:04,322 --> 01:19:07,199
think you can buy your way out
of everything, don't you?

1087
01:19:08,201 --> 01:19:11,829
- You think the world just revolves...
- Oh, I know, I know.

1088
01:19:14,166 --> 01:19:19,086
You're torn up inside
cos you think you don't like me.

1089
01:19:21,715 --> 01:19:22,715
News for you.

1090
01:19:24,176 --> 01:19:26,802
You fucking love me.

1091
01:19:28,680 --> 01:19:31,390
You'd like to be me,

1092
01:19:31,475 --> 01:19:35,686
you just can't quite admit it, can you?

1093
01:19:39,065 --> 01:19:41,192
Chip on your shoulder much?

1094
01:19:48,241 --> 01:19:53,078
You're no better than a bunch of kids
breaking shop windows.

1095
01:19:57,209 --> 01:19:59,627
You're just spoiled little brats.

1096
01:20:14,392 --> 01:20:16,310
Oops.

1097
01:20:21,233 --> 01:20:23,567
Shit, Villiers, get the door,
get the door.

1098
01:20:26,029 --> 01:20:27,238
Come on.

1099
01:20:31,201 --> 01:20:32,201
No, no, no, no.

1100
01:20:39,626 --> 01:20:41,544
Wouldn't want you to be out of pocket.

1101
01:21:03,108 --> 01:21:04,775
Go, go, go, go.

1102
01:21:12,117 --> 01:21:13,117
Fuck.

1103
01:21:13,201 --> 01:21:14,201
Bowler.

1104
01:21:15,495 --> 01:21:16,495
Come on.

1105
01:21:39,477 --> 01:21:41,353
Toby, Toby, Toby, Toby.

1106
01:21:41,646 --> 01:21:42,646
It's OK.

1107
01:21:43,315 --> 01:21:44,565
Guys...

1108
01:21:45,817 --> 01:21:47,985
What the, the fuck are you doing?

1109
01:21:50,822 --> 01:21:52,072
He was pushing me all night.

1110
01:21:52,782 --> 01:21:55,159
Jesus fucking Christ, is he breathing?

1111
01:21:55,201 --> 01:21:56,201
Yeah. Just.

1112
01:21:57,662 --> 01:21:58,662
Ambulance, please.

1113
01:22:00,290 --> 01:22:01,999
Hang up, Milo. Milo, hang up the phone.

1114
01:22:02,042 --> 01:22:03,626
The Bull's Head, Kidsbury.

1115
01:22:03,668 --> 01:22:06,253
- Somebody's unconscious.
- Wait. Say he fell. Say he fell.

1116
01:22:07,547 --> 01:22:08,547
He was punched.

1117
01:22:09,132 --> 01:22:10,174
Fuck's sakes, Richards.

1118
01:22:13,595 --> 01:22:15,387
I'm gonna be sick.

1119
01:22:15,472 --> 01:22:17,872
Mate, they'll send the police,
you said there's been a fight.

1120
01:22:19,684 --> 01:22:20,684
Fuck.

1121
01:22:21,519 --> 01:22:23,520
Right, guys, listen,

1122
01:22:23,605 --> 01:22:25,856
nobody says anything to them, OK?

1123
01:22:25,899 --> 01:22:27,858
I think it's pretty fucking obvious
what's happened.

1124
01:22:27,901 --> 01:22:29,526
Just say, "No comment", yes?

1125
01:22:29,611 --> 01:22:31,111
Get the money out.

1126
01:22:34,199 --> 01:22:37,201
I didn't do this. I didn't do this.

1127
01:22:37,285 --> 01:22:40,788
Mate, it's the club, right?
We all did this.

1128
01:24:42,368 --> 01:24:44,787
Did you say anything?

1129
01:24:44,829 --> 01:24:45,829
Nothing.

1130
01:24:47,540 --> 01:24:48,874
You?

1131
01:24:48,958 --> 01:24:50,125
Uh-uh.

1132
01:24:54,506 --> 01:24:55,506
Mate.

1133
01:24:56,382 --> 01:24:58,759
Remember when you did the bedroom trash?

1134
01:24:58,843 --> 01:24:59,927
Yeah.

1135
01:25:00,678 --> 01:25:02,846
Whose room did you do first?

1136
01:25:03,723 --> 01:25:04,807
Why?

1137
01:25:06,267 --> 01:25:09,019
Is this your driver?
I'll tell you in the car.

1138
01:25:23,701 --> 01:25:26,141
- Are you a relative?
- I don't need to see him,

1139
01:25:26,204 --> 01:25:27,788
I just want to find out if he's OK...

1140
01:25:27,872 --> 01:25:29,998
The fuck are you doing here?

1141
01:25:30,041 --> 01:25:32,000
See how much trouble you're in?

1142
01:25:32,043 --> 01:25:34,284
It's alright. It's going to be fine.
Thank you very much.

1143
01:25:34,295 --> 01:25:35,671
Excuse me.

1144
01:25:35,713 --> 01:25:38,799
Excuse me, I'm sorry,
I just wanted to check, is he...

1145
01:25:38,883 --> 01:25:40,884
Is he what? Is he dead?

1146
01:25:40,927 --> 01:25:42,261
- Is he dead?
- No.

1147
01:25:42,345 --> 01:25:44,555
Now get back in your Bentley
and fuck off.

1148
01:25:53,565 --> 01:25:56,817
One of his lungs has collapsed.
He's got a blood clot in his brain.

1149
01:25:56,901 --> 01:25:58,068
Fuck.

1150
01:25:58,153 --> 01:26:01,405
Two broken ribs. Collarbone.
Several fingers, broken nose,

1151
01:26:01,489 --> 01:26:03,991
ruptured spleen, internal bleeding.

1152
01:26:05,034 --> 01:26:07,077
Right now they're trying to
save the sight in his left eye,

1153
01:26:07,162 --> 01:26:09,204
does that answer your fucking question?

1154
01:26:12,417 --> 01:26:13,417
Yes.

1155
01:26:19,424 --> 01:26:20,424
Dad.

1156
01:26:22,093 --> 01:26:25,012
They're asking if you
can remember anything.

1157
01:26:26,097 --> 01:26:27,472
Who hit you?

1158
01:26:32,145 --> 01:26:33,645
I don't know.

1159
01:26:37,442 --> 01:26:39,193
They all look the same.

1160
01:26:45,116 --> 01:26:46,950
- Where's Miles?
- I don't know.

1161
01:26:51,289 --> 01:26:53,123
So, what do we do?

1162
01:26:53,208 --> 01:26:54,791
Wait.

1163
01:26:54,876 --> 01:26:58,037
My lawyer says they'll call us back for
second interviews if they find anything.

1164
01:26:58,046 --> 01:26:59,630
They'll find fingerprints
and things, won't they?

1165
01:26:59,714 --> 01:27:01,465
Ivan says we carry on. Say nothing.

1166
01:27:01,549 --> 01:27:02,841
How far is that going to get us?

1167
01:27:02,926 --> 01:27:04,468
It got us bail, didn't it?

1168
01:27:04,510 --> 01:27:06,678
At least we've got time to think.

1169
01:27:06,763 --> 01:27:07,763
Well, can someone come up
with something?

1170
01:27:07,805 --> 01:27:09,285
Cos I'd really like to have a career.

1171
01:27:09,307 --> 01:27:11,433
Self-defense. He came at us
waving a knife.

1172
01:27:11,476 --> 01:27:12,517
What? Ten on one?

1173
01:27:19,776 --> 01:27:21,443
How about we give them someone?

1174
01:27:22,320 --> 01:27:23,362
You mean, the police?

1175
01:27:23,905 --> 01:27:26,907
We choose one person,
ideally a volunteer,

1176
01:27:26,991 --> 01:27:29,326
we all say he was the one
who had the fight with the landlord.

1177
01:27:29,369 --> 01:27:32,871
What about the club?
Sticking together, all for one?

1178
01:27:32,956 --> 01:27:36,583
Wait. One man confesses,
takes a hit for the team.

1179
01:27:36,668 --> 01:27:37,709
Nine of us stay clean.

1180
01:27:37,794 --> 01:27:38,794
He'd be a fucking hero.

1181
01:27:39,337 --> 01:27:41,421
And the rest of us do what we can
to help him in the future.

1182
01:27:41,506 --> 01:27:43,067
You don't leave a man out in the field,

1183
01:27:43,132 --> 01:27:46,551
- this is not what we do.
- Balf, it's not fucking Dunkirk.

1184
01:27:46,636 --> 01:27:48,156
Surely, we don't get to choose?

1185
01:27:48,680 --> 01:27:49,680
Mate?

1186
01:27:50,223 --> 01:27:52,557
Surely it's up to the police
who gets punished?

1187
01:27:53,559 --> 01:27:55,686
The landlord can't remember who hit him.

1188
01:27:55,728 --> 01:27:57,688
So, we can decide that.

1189
01:28:03,528 --> 01:28:04,528
So?

1190
01:28:05,196 --> 01:28:06,613
Who is it going to be?

1191
01:28:07,031 --> 01:28:08,365
It's pretty obvious, isn't it?

1192
01:28:08,408 --> 01:28:09,616
Ryle...

1193
01:28:11,953 --> 01:28:13,537
Would you like to volunteer?

1194
01:28:14,872 --> 01:28:15,914
What?

1195
01:28:15,999 --> 01:28:18,333
You did punch him first.

1196
01:28:18,376 --> 01:28:20,711
I wasn't the only one.

1197
01:28:20,753 --> 01:28:22,713
The rest of you wanted
to, even if you didn't.

1198
01:28:22,797 --> 01:28:24,756
You did get everyone wound up.

1199
01:28:24,841 --> 01:28:25,882
What?

1200
01:28:25,967 --> 01:28:28,208
That stuff you said, "Stop apologizing",
"Them and us"...

1201
01:28:28,219 --> 01:28:30,699
I was only saying what every other
fucker in here was thinking.

1202
01:28:30,722 --> 01:28:32,389
Incitement. It was incitement.

1203
01:28:32,473 --> 01:28:34,599
I mean, didn't your brother tell you
it was a dinner, not a rally?

1204
01:28:34,684 --> 01:28:36,560
Nothing like his brother.

1205
01:28:39,230 --> 01:28:41,648
It should be the president,
shouldn't it?

1206
01:28:43,151 --> 01:28:44,401
What the fuck?

1207
01:28:44,444 --> 01:28:48,071
If anyone's going to fall
on their sword, shouldn't it be you?

1208
01:28:50,450 --> 01:28:52,951
I, I didn't even touch him.

1209
01:28:53,036 --> 01:28:54,745
Man up and take it.

1210
01:28:56,622 --> 01:28:57,622
Boys...

1211
01:28:57,707 --> 01:29:00,917
Or we do the logical
thing, last in, first out.

1212
01:29:01,252 --> 01:29:02,419
What, the newest member?

1213
01:29:02,462 --> 01:29:03,503
But we've got two new members.

1214
01:29:03,588 --> 01:29:05,047
Yeah, but technically
you only become a member

1215
01:29:05,089 --> 01:29:07,257
once your room's trashed, so it depends
on which order we did that.

1216
01:29:07,342 --> 01:29:09,509
We did Ryle first, so technically...

1217
01:29:10,887 --> 01:29:12,304
Technically, it's Miles.

1218
01:29:20,772 --> 01:29:22,022
I didn't do anything.

1219
01:29:24,442 --> 01:29:25,901
You did call the ambulance.

1220
01:29:28,905 --> 01:29:31,156
I'm not going to go in
there and say I did this.

1221
01:29:31,240 --> 01:29:32,240
What the fuck?

1222
01:29:32,325 --> 01:29:33,325
We'll all rally.

1223
01:29:34,035 --> 01:29:36,796
Dimitri can get you a shit-hot lawyer.
You'd be doing it for the club.

1224
01:29:36,829 --> 01:29:37,913
Fuck the club.

1225
01:29:37,955 --> 01:29:39,675
We're not still talking
about that, are we?

1226
01:29:40,458 --> 01:29:42,459
I'm sorry, but I can't...

1227
01:29:43,252 --> 01:29:45,045
God, if it really kicked off...

1228
01:29:45,129 --> 01:29:46,838
We could all get sent down from college.

1229
01:29:46,923 --> 01:29:49,466
Yes, and that's the worst possible thing
you can imagine happening, is it?

1230
01:29:49,509 --> 01:29:53,136
Miles, I have holes in my pockets
and no one useful on speed dial.

1231
01:29:53,971 --> 01:29:55,180
I'm built for hiding in libraries.

1232
01:29:55,264 --> 01:29:57,307
I'm not gonna lie to the police,
so you can ponce around

1233
01:29:57,392 --> 01:29:59,142
in a fucking cape for
the rest of your life.

1234
01:29:59,168 --> 01:30:00,217
Thing is, mate,

1235
01:30:01,562 --> 01:30:02,896
it's nine against one.

1236
01:30:04,565 --> 01:30:06,191
Whatever you say.

1237
01:30:36,597 --> 01:30:39,141
Can I, uh, speak to you?

1238
01:30:39,183 --> 01:30:42,018
- Somewhere not...
- I've got nothing to say.

1239
01:30:44,480 --> 01:30:47,023
Please, I have to talk to you...

1240
01:30:53,072 --> 01:30:55,073
You let them humiliate me.

1241
01:30:57,827 --> 01:30:59,161
I'm sorry.

1242
01:31:02,206 --> 01:31:03,665
Really sorry.

1243
01:31:04,667 --> 01:31:08,545
And I will do whatever you want
to prove that to you, but...

1244
01:31:08,588 --> 01:31:10,338
I need your help, something
has happened...

1245
01:31:10,381 --> 01:31:12,421
Why should I help you
after what you put me through?

1246
01:31:12,467 --> 01:31:15,969
I didn't do what you think,
I tried to stop them...

1247
01:31:16,053 --> 01:31:17,554
You were there.

1248
01:31:18,181 --> 01:31:20,140
You had a choice, Miles.

1249
01:31:21,350 --> 01:31:23,059
You chose to do nothing

1250
01:31:23,144 --> 01:31:27,689
and if you speak to me ever again,
I will report you,

1251
01:31:27,732 --> 01:31:30,484
all of you, for assault.

1252
01:31:31,068 --> 01:31:32,319
Please...

1253
01:31:58,387 --> 01:32:00,347
Alistair Ryle?

1254
01:32:00,431 --> 01:32:01,598
Uh, no.

1255
01:32:02,642 --> 01:32:04,267
This is his room?

1256
01:32:04,894 --> 01:32:06,728
No, we, we swapped.

1257
01:32:07,772 --> 01:32:11,942
He's in Cloister Quad, Walsingham,
number six, I think.

1258
01:32:13,819 --> 01:32:15,320
You got some ID?

1259
01:32:15,404 --> 01:32:16,571
Yeah, yeah.

1260
01:32:34,632 --> 01:32:36,383
Sorry to disturb you.

1261
01:32:36,467 --> 01:32:38,510
No, it's fine. Thank you.

1262
01:32:53,484 --> 01:32:54,901
Alistair Ryle?

1263
01:33:12,211 --> 01:33:14,838
They found bits of the landlord
under Ryle's fingernails.

1264
01:33:14,922 --> 01:33:15,922
Bits?

1265
01:33:16,007 --> 01:33:18,133
I don't know, skin and stuff. Skin.

1266
01:33:18,175 --> 01:33:19,801
And they've charged him?

1267
01:33:19,844 --> 01:33:20,844
Yeah.

1268
01:33:21,679 --> 01:33:22,679
Just him?

1269
01:33:22,763 --> 01:33:23,805
Yes.

1270
01:33:24,390 --> 01:33:26,430
And the rest of us pay a police fine
for the damage.

1271
01:33:26,475 --> 01:33:27,726
No criminal record.

1272
01:33:27,810 --> 01:33:29,131
And do we trust Ryle to...

1273
01:33:29,186 --> 01:33:31,146
Of course, we do. The man's a legend.

1274
01:33:32,023 --> 01:33:33,983
And what about college?
Are we gonna be sent down?

1275
01:33:34,650 --> 01:33:38,153
You're a fucking pussy, Leighton,
you know that?

1276
01:34:00,134 --> 01:34:02,844
Were it up to me,
these boys would be sent down

1277
01:34:02,887 --> 01:34:06,097
for moral vacuity and unspeakable
thoughtlessness.

1278
01:34:07,058 --> 01:34:10,185
However, I have been outvoted.

1279
01:34:10,978 --> 01:34:14,314
Since the police have decided
to prosecute only one of the boys,

1280
01:34:14,398 --> 01:34:18,151
the council of colleges doesn't feel
justified in removing all 10.

1281
01:34:19,779 --> 01:34:22,364
Not with the roasting
we'd receive from the press.

1282
01:34:23,491 --> 01:34:26,117
Only Alistair Ryle is to be sent down.

1283
01:34:27,745 --> 01:34:30,455
Oh well, that is, my gosh,

1284
01:34:30,998 --> 01:34:32,916
that is very good news.

1285
01:34:33,626 --> 01:34:37,212
Time will tell if it was one bad apple
spoiling the rest.

1286
01:34:37,338 --> 01:34:39,631
Well, thank you.

1287
01:34:40,633 --> 01:34:44,719
Of course, if there's anything we can do
to say thank you to the college...

1288
01:34:48,432 --> 01:34:50,433
Anything?

1289
01:34:50,476 --> 01:34:51,476
No.

1290
01:34:59,360 --> 01:35:01,695
OK, Olly, let's go.

1291
01:35:01,779 --> 01:35:04,280
Your marvelous brother's got away
with it this time.

1292
01:35:04,323 --> 01:35:05,657
- What's that mean?
- He stays.

1293
01:35:05,741 --> 01:35:08,201
He's allowed back after the holidays.
Thank God.

1294
01:35:08,285 --> 01:35:09,744
Richards, mate.

1295
01:35:09,787 --> 01:35:12,038
I was just coming to find you.

1296
01:35:17,336 --> 01:35:18,336
Sorry.

1297
01:35:19,213 --> 01:35:21,256
Guy Bellingfield.

1298
01:35:21,298 --> 01:35:23,425
Wonderful to meet you,
I've heard so much.

1299
01:35:25,553 --> 01:35:27,595
You're not a friend
from this club, are you?

1300
01:35:27,638 --> 01:35:30,140
Uh, from the history society,

1301
01:35:30,224 --> 01:35:31,891
Junior Historians.

1302
01:35:32,476 --> 01:35:37,313
Actually, I'm the new president
of the Junior Historians.

1303
01:35:37,356 --> 01:35:38,940
President?

1304
01:35:38,983 --> 01:35:42,902
The previous incumbent was shown
not to be up to the job, so...

1305
01:35:44,447 --> 01:35:48,825
I thought we could get together,
discuss next term's lecture series,

1306
01:35:48,868 --> 01:35:50,827
if you fancy coming along.

1307
01:35:54,790 --> 01:35:56,666
Maybe, it's not for me.

1308
01:35:57,835 --> 01:36:01,463
I'm done with societies.
I'll be fine on my own.

1309
01:36:02,757 --> 01:36:03,757
But thanks.

1310
01:36:08,220 --> 01:36:10,889
Well, good luck with that.

1311
01:36:11,682 --> 01:36:13,975
Um, good to meet you.

1312
01:36:18,564 --> 01:36:21,232
Tubes, mate, club meeting.

1313
01:36:21,859 --> 01:36:24,694
Operation Grasshopper,
call me back, yeah?

1314
01:36:54,058 --> 01:36:57,560
Alistair. Good of you to come.

1315
01:36:57,645 --> 01:36:59,270
Harry said you wanted to see me.

1316
01:36:59,355 --> 01:37:01,231
Do you want some lunch?

1317
01:37:01,941 --> 01:37:02,941
Yeah.

1318
01:37:11,242 --> 01:37:13,576
You're with Johnny Drummond, right?

1319
01:37:14,829 --> 01:37:16,079
Dad trusts him.

1320
01:37:16,121 --> 01:37:19,791
He's a good lawyer.
What's he advising, self-defense?

1321
01:37:19,875 --> 01:37:22,502
Landlord was carrying a knife, I hear.

1322
01:37:23,087 --> 01:37:26,422
We're going with "I was bullied into it".

1323
01:37:26,507 --> 01:37:29,300
That the club scapegoated me,
which is pretty much the truth.

1324
01:37:29,385 --> 01:37:33,263
Forgive me, but wouldn't it be better
if the club could be kept out of it?

1325
01:37:35,641 --> 01:37:38,852
- I don't see how it could...
- Oh, with the right lawyer, certainly.

1326
01:37:38,936 --> 01:37:40,228
I know a man,

1327
01:37:40,271 --> 01:37:43,940
ex-member himself, very
useful at sorting out our scrapes
over the years.

1328
01:37:44,567 --> 01:37:47,235
I don't give a shit about the club.

1329
01:37:47,278 --> 01:37:48,653
Smash it.

1330
01:37:51,407 --> 01:37:52,949
It's a bunker, isn't it?

1331
01:37:53,826 --> 01:37:56,744
Training up a generation
for a life in hiding.

1332
01:37:56,787 --> 01:37:58,955
We're not in hiding.

1333
01:37:59,039 --> 01:38:00,957
It's an adaptation.

1334
01:38:01,041 --> 01:38:03,251
We adapt to survive.

1335
01:38:05,004 --> 01:38:09,465
The dinners are just the beginning,
a three-year initiation, if you like.

1336
01:38:09,508 --> 01:38:12,677
Now, you might have lost your place at
college, but you're still in the club.

1337
01:38:12,761 --> 01:38:14,846
You can't afford not to be.

1338
01:38:15,639 --> 01:38:18,266
Look, why don't you come and
spend some time in my office,

1339
01:38:18,309 --> 01:38:19,517
see how we do things?

1340
01:38:20,644 --> 01:38:22,812
I don't want anything handed
to me on a plate...

1341
01:38:22,897 --> 01:38:25,315
I'm not giving you a constituency.

1342
01:38:25,399 --> 01:38:28,484
Maybe you've got it in you to
do something special one day.

1343
01:38:28,527 --> 01:38:31,821
And I'd rather you be doing it
in my camp than someone else's.

1344
01:38:42,374 --> 01:38:46,920
I'm not just offering you a better lawyer,
Alistair, I am offering you a future.

1345
01:38:57,890 --> 01:38:58,890
Good.

1346
01:39:06,398 --> 01:39:09,108
You know Lord Riot did not
spell his name R-I-O-T,

1347
01:39:09,193 --> 01:39:10,693
but R-Y-O-T?

1348
01:39:10,778 --> 01:39:13,363
Nothing to do with riotous behaviour.

1349
01:39:15,032 --> 01:39:17,617
Still, thank God, eh?

1350
01:39:17,701 --> 01:39:20,370
Thank God someone made the switch.

1351
01:39:20,412 --> 01:39:22,664
Could have just been a mistake.

1352
01:39:22,706 --> 01:39:25,541
People like us don't make mistakes,
do we?

1353
01:40:19,800 --> 01:40:25,050
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