1 00:01:08,372 --> 00:01:11,124 This is the BBC Home Service. 2 00:01:11,167 --> 00:01:13,954 Here is the news at nine o'clock. 3 00:01:14,003 --> 00:01:18,463 The unsuccessful evacuation of our armed forces from Dunkirk 4 00:01:18,507 --> 00:01:21,674 has resulted in over a quarter of a million of our troops 5 00:01:21,719 --> 00:01:24,424 stranded in occupied France. 6 00:01:24,472 --> 00:01:26,797 The Ministry of Defense has announced 7 00:01:26,849 --> 00:01:32,353 that, as of this moment, we should expect a full German invasion of this country 8 00:01:32,396 --> 00:01:34,472 over the forthcoming weeks. 9 00:01:39,445 --> 00:01:41,817 Bandits bearing one, zero, one. 10 00:01:41,864 --> 00:01:44,900 Stay tight. We should have a visual any minute. 11 00:01:44,950 --> 00:01:47,109 Listen up, Johnny, it's just you and me now. 12 00:01:47,161 --> 00:01:49,284 Stick close and don't do anything foolish. 13 00:01:49,330 --> 00:01:51,821 Roger, Red Leader. I'm right behind you. 14 00:01:51,874 --> 00:01:55,409 Right. Let's see how many of these bastards we can take with us. 15 00:01:56,212 --> 00:01:59,628 There they are. Bombers, three o'clock, low. 16 00:01:59,673 --> 00:02:03,007 For King and country. Tally ho! 17 00:02:07,765 --> 00:02:10,434 Johnny! I said stay on my wing! 18 00:02:10,476 --> 00:02:12,552 But I've got one in my sight. 19 00:02:18,234 --> 00:02:20,143 Don't be a bloody fool! 20 00:02:20,194 --> 00:02:23,314 There's a Kraut with the hots for you. You're a sitting duck, man! 21 00:02:26,367 --> 00:02:27,778 He's got me, I'm hit! 22 00:02:29,245 --> 00:02:32,530 Johnny! Get out of there! Use your damn parachute! 23 00:02:33,374 --> 00:02:36,291 I can't! My canopy's stuck! 24 00:02:36,335 --> 00:02:38,541 Help! 25 00:02:41,966 --> 00:02:45,666 You rotters! You stinking rotters! 26 00:02:45,719 --> 00:02:48,293 All right, this is for Johnny 27 00:02:48,347 --> 00:02:49,806 and all the others! 28 00:02:57,231 --> 00:03:00,232 Ha! Take that, Fritzy. 29 00:03:08,993 --> 00:03:11,069 - Damn, I'm hit! 30 00:03:12,121 --> 00:03:14,410 I'm going down! 31 00:03:14,457 --> 00:03:16,283 We're done for. 32 00:03:16,333 --> 00:03:19,999 It's all over to you now, the people of England. 33 00:03:20,045 --> 00:03:22,881 Tell my wife I love her very much. 34 00:06:15,046 --> 00:06:19,589 I'm going to bring my little barges across the water. 35 00:06:23,221 --> 00:06:26,056 Ach! You win again, Herr Goebbels. 36 00:06:26,099 --> 00:06:28,886 You stopped me from invading England. 37 00:06:28,935 --> 00:06:30,809 I did, I did! 38 00:06:30,854 --> 00:06:34,389 That makes it three-nil. 39 00:06:34,441 --> 00:06:38,485 But still, this hasn't solved the problem of the invasion. 40 00:06:39,404 --> 00:06:41,195 Oh, hi, boys! 41 00:06:41,239 --> 00:06:43,066 Himmler! 42 00:06:43,116 --> 00:06:45,572 Goering, old bean, you're looking good. 43 00:06:45,618 --> 00:06:49,118 Hello, Goebbels. How are you feeling, little fellow? 44 00:06:49,164 --> 00:06:51,536 I beat Herr Goering at war! 45 00:06:51,583 --> 00:06:55,711 So, you still can't find a way into England, Goering? 46 00:06:55,754 --> 00:06:58,589 Nein. I have tried everything. 47 00:06:58,632 --> 00:07:01,835 Zis endless fog over the Englander Channel 48 00:07:01,885 --> 00:07:05,218 has prevented all of our plans for invading England. 49 00:07:05,263 --> 00:07:09,095 Well, now that the whole of ze Englander army is stuck in France 50 00:07:09,142 --> 00:07:11,811 and ze RAF is annihilated! 51 00:07:11,853 --> 00:07:13,098 Ah-da, da-da, da-da! 52 00:07:13,146 --> 00:07:15,471 Ze Fuhrer has an ingenious plan of attack. 53 00:07:15,523 --> 00:07:17,599 Oh, what is it, Herr Himmler? 54 00:07:17,651 --> 00:07:21,518 I have tried every possible means of attacking zat little island. 55 00:07:21,571 --> 00:07:24,192 He wants us to dig under ze Englander Channel 56 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:26,613 right into ze heart of London, 57 00:07:26,660 --> 00:07:29,863 capture Herr Winston Churchill from Downing Street, 58 00:07:29,913 --> 00:07:32,582 zen lock him in a cage! 59 00:07:34,459 --> 00:07:39,002 Ooh, what a beautiful plan, mein Fuhrer. 60 00:07:39,047 --> 00:07:41,620 Did you hear that, Goebbels, darling? 61 00:07:41,675 --> 00:07:45,459 - We will be summering in London! - Oh, joyous joy! 62 00:07:45,512 --> 00:07:50,886 Oh-ho! Not even the Englander weather can prevent us now! 63 00:08:26,350 --> 00:08:29,434 Chris. Come on, lad, tea break's over. 64 00:08:29,478 --> 00:08:31,886 - Put them big hands to use. - Coming, Tom. 65 00:08:31,939 --> 00:08:34,560 Back to the village for a pie and a pint, I reckon. 66 00:08:34,608 --> 00:08:37,479 Right. Let's get this harvest home. 67 00:08:37,528 --> 00:08:39,853 Hyah! 68 00:08:39,905 --> 00:08:41,945 Come on, there, boy, come on. 69 00:09:07,892 --> 00:09:12,269 Ah, another day in God's glorious kingdom! 70 00:09:12,313 --> 00:09:14,934 - Morning, Vicar. - Good morning, Albert. 71 00:09:14,982 --> 00:09:16,607 Lovely day for it. 72 00:09:16,650 --> 00:09:19,568 Then I attacked the second bunker and destroyed three more tanks 73 00:09:19,612 --> 00:09:22,815 before holding off the German army single-handed, 74 00:09:22,865 --> 00:09:26,483 - only to find I was still stuck in France. - What did you do? 75 00:09:26,535 --> 00:09:29,287 I swam the 20-odd miles of Channel back to Dover, 76 00:09:29,330 --> 00:09:32,781 whereupon I was presented with my second Victoria Cross. 77 00:09:32,833 --> 00:09:36,783 Oh! Captain English, you're so brave! 78 00:09:36,837 --> 00:09:37,952 Yes, I know. 79 00:09:38,005 --> 00:09:39,665 And handsome. 80 00:09:39,715 --> 00:09:42,289 I suppose I am, rather. 81 00:09:42,927 --> 00:09:44,635 Now, tell me, Reverend, 82 00:09:44,678 --> 00:09:47,169 how is that fine young daughter of yours? 83 00:09:47,223 --> 00:09:49,096 She's well, thank you, Captain. 84 00:09:49,141 --> 00:09:52,557 A minor hiccup at boarding school. In need of a little direction now, I think. 85 00:09:52,603 --> 00:09:55,011 - Have a look at my tulips. - Daisy... 86 00:09:55,064 --> 00:09:57,140 come and say hello to Captain English. 87 00:10:27,179 --> 00:10:28,211 Igor! 88 00:10:28,264 --> 00:10:30,671 Jawohl, Herr Kapitan? 89 00:10:30,725 --> 00:10:33,216 We are 50 miles from London. 90 00:10:33,269 --> 00:10:35,427 Prepare to test weapons. 91 00:10:35,479 --> 00:10:37,851 Jawohl, Herr Kapitan! 92 00:10:37,898 --> 00:10:41,018 - Ah, the harvest has come home. 93 00:10:50,244 --> 00:10:53,909 Ah, a good turnout this year. 94 00:10:53,956 --> 00:10:56,114 And look, there's lovely Daisy. 95 00:10:56,167 --> 00:10:59,037 As charming and as sweet as the first rose in spring. 96 00:10:59,086 --> 00:11:02,289 Daisy? What's she doing back from boarding school so early? 97 00:11:04,008 --> 00:11:06,131 Yes, it is hard, juggling one's career 98 00:11:06,177 --> 00:11:10,388 between saving England and modeling Brylcreem and rugby shorts. 99 00:11:10,431 --> 00:11:11,890 Amazing! 100 00:11:14,185 --> 00:11:15,216 Now... 101 00:11:16,228 --> 00:11:17,972 - Hello, Daisy. - Chris! 102 00:11:18,022 --> 00:11:20,429 - Ooh! Oh, my goodness. - Oh, careful. 103 00:11:20,483 --> 00:11:23,187 Here, let me get those for you. 104 00:11:23,235 --> 00:11:25,726 Oh, sorry, they're a little bit crushed. 105 00:11:25,780 --> 00:11:27,856 Oh, don't worry, Chris, it's all right. 106 00:11:27,907 --> 00:11:31,406 So, you're a farmer now. I thought you always wanted to join the army. 107 00:11:31,452 --> 00:11:33,824 No, they said my hands are too big. 108 00:11:33,871 --> 00:11:37,370 They said hands like this is more valuable in a cornfield than in a battlefield. 109 00:11:37,416 --> 00:11:40,168 Oh, you and your big hands. 110 00:11:40,211 --> 00:11:42,666 Always got you into trouble, like that time at Sunday school. 111 00:11:42,713 --> 00:11:45,002 So, are you gonna be around these parts for a while, then? 112 00:11:45,049 --> 00:11:48,216 Oh, it looks that way. Father wants me to become a FANY. 113 00:11:48,260 --> 00:11:51,178 - You what? - A FANY. First Aid Nursing Yeomanry. 114 00:11:51,222 --> 00:11:54,507 We're all young FANY here. Matron Rutty is our head FANY. 115 00:11:54,558 --> 00:11:56,350 Girls, do your bit! 116 00:11:56,394 --> 00:11:59,597 Join my FANY and see the world! 117 00:11:59,647 --> 00:12:02,102 Daisy! Where the hell are you? 118 00:12:02,149 --> 00:12:04,308 Oh, that's Father. I'd better be off. 119 00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:06,815 Bye, Chris. Oh, and it was nice seeing you again. 120 00:12:06,862 --> 00:12:09,021 Bye, Daisy. 121 00:12:09,073 --> 00:12:11,196 What were you doing talking to that boy? 122 00:12:11,242 --> 00:12:14,492 It's only Chris, Father. We used to be friends. 123 00:12:14,537 --> 00:12:16,410 Don't be ridiculous, Daisy. 124 00:12:16,455 --> 00:12:19,990 The village orphan, with those fat, retarded hands? 125 00:12:20,042 --> 00:12:23,079 Oh, take no notice of what they say, lad. 126 00:12:29,969 --> 00:12:32,756 Herr Kapitan, target sighted. 127 00:12:32,805 --> 00:12:35,343 Eine small Englander village. 128 00:12:35,391 --> 00:12:38,760 Excellent. Stand by, all stations. 129 00:12:40,312 --> 00:12:42,471 Hang on, hang on... 130 00:12:42,523 --> 00:12:45,857 - Oh, my goodness! 131 00:12:45,901 --> 00:12:48,309 Watch out, there's a whiff of Fritz in the air. 132 00:12:49,864 --> 00:12:51,821 Oh, my gosh. 133 00:12:53,367 --> 00:12:54,992 Oh, dear. 134 00:12:58,539 --> 00:13:00,282 Open ze bomb bay! 135 00:13:02,334 --> 00:13:04,292 Achtung. 136 00:13:06,297 --> 00:13:07,755 Achtung. 137 00:13:12,636 --> 00:13:14,296 Was ist das? 138 00:13:14,346 --> 00:13:16,006 Ein perambulator? 139 00:13:16,057 --> 00:13:18,298 Ein Englander baby? 140 00:13:18,350 --> 00:13:19,975 Igor. Bomb. Los! 141 00:13:23,355 --> 00:13:25,432 - Run for your lives! 142 00:13:25,483 --> 00:13:27,309 Nazi bomb! Look out! 143 00:13:28,110 --> 00:13:31,064 Oh, shit, it's heading for the baby's pram. 144 00:13:44,585 --> 00:13:46,079 Bloody 'ell. 145 00:13:46,128 --> 00:13:49,996 Shitbuckets! That's blown my chances of marrying off Daisy. 146 00:13:50,049 --> 00:13:52,919 Reverse engines. Schnell! 147 00:14:00,976 --> 00:14:04,262 Come on, what are you waiting for? He's a sitting duck! 148 00:14:04,313 --> 00:14:05,938 Action stations! 149 00:14:07,817 --> 00:14:09,477 Here we go, lads! 150 00:14:09,527 --> 00:14:12,896 Tom, get the hay off that cart and load up the machine gun. 151 00:14:13,697 --> 00:14:15,856 Let's go hunt some Germans. 152 00:14:15,908 --> 00:14:17,948 Let 'em have it, girls! 153 00:14:24,375 --> 00:14:27,708 - Ha! Bullets will do nothing 154 00:14:27,753 --> 00:14:29,710 against the armour plating! 155 00:14:29,755 --> 00:14:30,786 Fire! 156 00:14:33,801 --> 00:14:37,004 - Christopher, these bullets are useless. 157 00:14:37,054 --> 00:14:39,213 We need to get the flak gun working, lad. 158 00:14:39,265 --> 00:14:40,296 Right, Tom. 159 00:14:43,436 --> 00:14:45,096 Keep firing! 160 00:14:46,647 --> 00:14:50,098 - Get this thing up and running! - I can't, it's stuck. 161 00:14:57,616 --> 00:15:00,404 - Right, let her rip, Albert. - Here we go. 162 00:15:02,913 --> 00:15:06,413 Don't worry, I'll get the bugger. 163 00:15:08,586 --> 00:15:10,874 - Aargh! - You got him, Albert. 164 00:15:10,921 --> 00:15:14,125 We are losing altitude! 165 00:15:14,175 --> 00:15:17,176 We must gain height. Drop ze ballast. 166 00:15:17,219 --> 00:15:21,169 It is not good, Herr Kapitan, we are too heavy! 167 00:15:21,223 --> 00:15:23,216 We must lose more weight! 168 00:15:23,267 --> 00:15:27,181 We cannot let ze zeppelin fall into enemy hands. 169 00:15:30,357 --> 00:15:32,434 For ze fatherland, Igor. 170 00:15:32,485 --> 00:15:34,524 Jawohl, Herr Kapitan. 171 00:15:35,905 --> 00:15:38,312 Heil Hitler! 172 00:15:39,742 --> 00:15:41,319 Aaaargh! 173 00:15:42,244 --> 00:15:44,782 A slight improvement in altitude, sir. 174 00:15:44,830 --> 00:15:45,862 Raus! 175 00:15:45,915 --> 00:15:47,160 Heil Hitler! 176 00:15:55,299 --> 00:15:57,457 - We've got him on the run! 177 00:15:57,510 --> 00:15:59,419 He's on the run! 178 00:16:01,597 --> 00:16:03,969 Bye-bye, Englanders! 179 00:16:20,589 --> 00:16:22,048 Spitfire! 180 00:16:22,091 --> 00:16:23,466 Look, Tom. 181 00:16:23,509 --> 00:16:26,925 Yeah, and I reckon that's the last of the few. 182 00:16:44,989 --> 00:16:49,117 Shiiiiiit! 183 00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:11,009 Ah! 184 00:17:11,057 --> 00:17:12,681 Whoo-ee! 185 00:17:12,725 --> 00:17:17,019 Crash and burn! Just like my second marriage. 186 00:17:17,063 --> 00:17:19,554 Hey, what the? What's this? 187 00:17:20,149 --> 00:17:23,732 Smells like Russky propaganda. 188 00:17:23,778 --> 00:17:25,817 Shit. 189 00:17:25,863 --> 00:17:28,781 It looks like England just screwed the pooch. 190 00:17:28,824 --> 00:17:31,232 - I gotta haul ass to London. 191 00:17:31,285 --> 00:17:34,488 These commies ain't seen the last of Billy Fiske! 192 00:17:34,538 --> 00:17:35,914 - Yaah! 193 00:17:46,842 --> 00:17:50,887 I can't be doing with all these politics of war and suchlike. 194 00:17:50,930 --> 00:17:54,014 Much rather spend me time painting landscapes, 195 00:17:54,058 --> 00:17:55,967 or building a wall. 196 00:17:56,018 --> 00:18:00,265 Nice cul-de-sac for our retirement, eh, Pinkypoo? 197 00:18:00,314 --> 00:18:03,814 - Just three more days till me pension. 198 00:18:03,859 --> 00:18:07,026 - Morning paper, sir? - Ah, thank you. 199 00:18:07,071 --> 00:18:10,321 What's this? Invasion looms? 200 00:18:10,366 --> 00:18:13,153 Hitler will invade today? 201 00:18:13,202 --> 00:18:14,281 Blast! 202 00:18:14,328 --> 00:18:16,700 So much for an early retirement. 203 00:18:16,747 --> 00:18:19,665 'Ere, are you Mr Winston Churchill? 204 00:18:19,709 --> 00:18:21,119 Hmm? What? 205 00:18:21,168 --> 00:18:22,711 Why, yes, I am. 206 00:18:22,753 --> 00:18:25,209 Is that your cat? He looks like Hitler. 207 00:18:25,256 --> 00:18:27,332 What? Pinkypoo? 208 00:18:27,383 --> 00:18:29,459 - Stuff and nonsense. 209 00:18:29,510 --> 00:18:31,966 And what the bloody hell is going on up there? 210 00:18:32,013 --> 00:18:33,258 Who the devil are you? 211 00:18:33,306 --> 00:18:35,132 Joseph Kaplinsky, 212 00:18:35,182 --> 00:18:37,508 Polish Electrical Services. 213 00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:40,561 I make better telegraph lines for you. 214 00:18:40,605 --> 00:18:45,681 You can't just go putting up new telegraph lines wherever you damn well please! 215 00:18:45,735 --> 00:18:48,404 This is a listed road, man. 216 00:18:48,446 --> 00:18:51,862 Bah, I don't know why Hitler bothered with you Polish lot. 217 00:19:02,293 --> 00:19:04,998 - Les Anglais... 218 00:19:10,843 --> 00:19:14,544 - There's a foreigner down on the beach. - How can you tell, Albert? 219 00:19:14,597 --> 00:19:17,930 He's funny-looking, and he's up to something. 220 00:19:17,975 --> 00:19:19,553 Oh, let's have a look. 221 00:19:22,939 --> 00:19:24,599 It's just a fisherman, Albert. 222 00:19:24,649 --> 00:19:27,436 You can never be too careful these days. 223 00:19:27,485 --> 00:19:29,810 Albert, if the Nazis invade, 224 00:19:29,862 --> 00:19:32,780 do you really think they'll do it in a little boat like that? 225 00:19:32,823 --> 00:19:35,908 Well, I'm going to keep an eye on him. 226 00:19:35,952 --> 00:19:39,996 - Just as the sun was rising - Huh? 227 00:19:40,039 --> 00:19:43,408 I heard a maiden sing 228 00:19:43,459 --> 00:19:47,243 - In the valley below - Huh. 229 00:19:47,296 --> 00:19:49,253 Oh, don't des... 230 00:19:49,298 --> 00:19:52,465 Ooh, good morrow, kind sir. 231 00:19:52,510 --> 00:19:54,337 Alors. 232 00:19:55,304 --> 00:19:57,795 Ja, that's it! Keep drilling! 233 00:19:57,848 --> 00:20:00,968 London can't be far now! 234 00:20:09,026 --> 00:20:11,315 How's that foreigner getting on down there, Albert? 235 00:20:13,281 --> 00:20:16,365 He's getting on all right, by the looks of things. 236 00:20:16,409 --> 00:20:18,567 Another cup of tea, Christopher? 237 00:20:19,662 --> 00:20:22,034 - No, thanks. - You all right, my lad? 238 00:20:23,082 --> 00:20:27,661 'Ere, I know what's wrong. He's all loved up with that vicar's daughter. 239 00:20:27,712 --> 00:20:29,669 Ah, leave it out. 240 00:20:29,714 --> 00:20:32,287 Can't join the army, can't join the navy, 241 00:20:32,341 --> 00:20:34,001 can't even get in the blinkin' Home Guard. 242 00:20:34,051 --> 00:20:37,136 Sorry, Chris, but you know the army's rules about hands. 243 00:20:37,179 --> 00:20:39,849 Yeah, fingers too big to fit in the trigger guard. 244 00:20:39,890 --> 00:20:41,930 Now that's just nonsense. 245 00:20:41,976 --> 00:20:44,728 They're a fine set of paws you got there, lad, 246 00:20:44,770 --> 00:20:47,143 don't let anybody tell you no different. 247 00:20:47,189 --> 00:20:50,808 How the hell can I fight a Nazi invasion with a pitchfork and a tractor? 248 00:20:50,860 --> 00:20:53,777 Invasion? Nah, there won't be no invasion, lad. 249 00:20:53,821 --> 00:20:56,229 Yeah, they won't get past us. 250 00:20:56,282 --> 00:20:58,820 There's absolutely nothing we ain't thought of. 251 00:20:59,994 --> 00:21:02,485 - English Chronicle! English Chronicle! 252 00:21:02,538 --> 00:21:05,705 Invasion looms! Read all about it! 253 00:21:06,792 --> 00:21:09,200 - English Chronicle! - Oh, God, another day at the office. 254 00:21:09,253 --> 00:21:12,456 Drives me up the bleedin' wall. 255 00:21:12,506 --> 00:21:15,507 Veg! Get your lovely veg! 256 00:21:15,551 --> 00:21:17,129 'Ere y'are, darlin', you need your greens. 257 00:21:17,178 --> 00:21:20,878 Dutch tulips! Get 'em while they're good! 258 00:21:20,932 --> 00:21:23,008 Get your veg! Come on! 259 00:21:25,561 --> 00:21:28,515 Oh, I say, what is that noise? 260 00:21:31,567 --> 00:21:34,023 What's that? 261 00:21:36,072 --> 00:21:37,234 What the? 262 00:21:39,492 --> 00:21:42,243 What's this? Some kind of earthquake? 263 00:21:46,540 --> 00:21:48,996 I say, Pomfrey, do you hear what I hear? 264 00:21:51,045 --> 00:21:52,753 What the dickens? 265 00:22:13,859 --> 00:22:16,433 Holy shit. 266 00:22:16,487 --> 00:22:18,314 Jesus Christ! 267 00:22:20,741 --> 00:22:21,986 Fuckin' Ada! 268 00:22:33,421 --> 00:22:36,208 - Look! Nelson's Column. 269 00:22:36,257 --> 00:22:39,460 Herr Himmler, success. We are in London. 270 00:22:39,510 --> 00:22:43,342 Ahhh, excellent! 271 00:22:43,389 --> 00:22:45,714 Right through ze Northern Line. 272 00:22:45,766 --> 00:22:49,515 They'll be having delays on zat for ze next hundred years! 273 00:22:55,651 --> 00:22:59,020 Kill zem! Kill zem all! 274 00:22:59,071 --> 00:23:00,352 God's teeth! 275 00:23:00,406 --> 00:23:01,686 Feuer! 276 00:23:07,705 --> 00:23:09,911 - Do not run. 277 00:23:09,957 --> 00:23:11,866 Ze German army is your friend. 278 00:23:19,967 --> 00:23:23,668 Ugh, look at all them Nazis. 279 00:23:23,721 --> 00:23:26,888 Hey, don't worry, kid. I'm an American. 280 00:23:26,932 --> 00:23:30,977 Old Billy Fiske is gonna go get some payback. Yeah! 281 00:23:38,486 --> 00:23:41,237 My flowers! My beautiful flowers! 282 00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:09,179 Buggers are here! Tunnelled right up into our back entrance. 283 00:24:09,225 --> 00:24:12,012 What? Retirement shall have to wait. 284 00:24:12,061 --> 00:24:14,018 It is time for action. 285 00:24:14,063 --> 00:24:18,808 Sir, no, your place is here. We can't risk losing you. You must stay in the bunker. 286 00:24:18,859 --> 00:24:22,857 We have no army left. Who else is going to defend Downing Street? 287 00:24:22,905 --> 00:24:26,737 We still have Major Rupee and his brave Punjabi guards. 288 00:24:26,784 --> 00:24:29,987 I guarantee they will stand and fight. 289 00:24:32,915 --> 00:24:35,453 Brave men of the Punjab, 290 00:24:35,501 --> 00:24:38,835 we are the last of the remaining Empire, 291 00:24:38,879 --> 00:24:41,797 the only soldiers England has left. 292 00:24:42,466 --> 00:24:47,009 Their army has surrendered, helpless, on the shores of Dunkirk. 293 00:24:47,638 --> 00:24:51,553 So now this honour has been bestowed on us - 294 00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:54,092 us, the men of the Raj. 295 00:24:54,145 --> 00:24:59,519 And when the time comes we will all do our duty for England 296 00:24:59,567 --> 00:25:02,770 and protect Churchill Sahib at all costs! 297 00:25:02,820 --> 00:25:04,647 Whoo-ee! 298 00:25:04,697 --> 00:25:06,571 What in the name of? 299 00:25:06,616 --> 00:25:09,652 Bloody 'ell, it's Billy Fiske! 300 00:25:09,702 --> 00:25:13,118 Well, if it ain't Major Rupee and his pack of Injuns. 301 00:25:13,164 --> 00:25:17,707 You mean to tell me that out of the whole bloody Royal Air Force 302 00:25:17,752 --> 00:25:21,121 the only pilot to survive the Battle of Britain was... 303 00:25:21,172 --> 00:25:24,375 An American! That's right, hot dog. 304 00:25:24,425 --> 00:25:25,884 Mornin', boys. 305 00:25:25,926 --> 00:25:29,509 I suppose you have come to pay me that 50 American dollars you owe me? 306 00:25:29,555 --> 00:25:32,971 Nope. Wallet got shot out of my pants this morning. 307 00:25:33,017 --> 00:25:36,101 Your 50 bucks is somewhere over France now, buddy. 308 00:25:36,145 --> 00:25:37,723 I might have known! 309 00:25:37,772 --> 00:25:42,232 That is the last time I play poker with some half-wit, two-bit crop-duster pilot. 310 00:25:42,276 --> 00:25:46,653 Oh, yeah? Pal, half the Soviet army is around that corner. 311 00:25:46,697 --> 00:25:47,728 You mean German. 312 00:25:47,782 --> 00:25:50,948 They're gonna roll their tanks up this street like shit through a goose, 313 00:25:50,993 --> 00:25:53,615 so quit your jabbering and saddle up. 314 00:25:53,663 --> 00:25:56,498 - Lock and load, guys! - Make ready, men! 315 00:25:58,709 --> 00:26:00,998 Hey, pal, time to take a hike. 316 00:26:01,045 --> 00:26:03,880 No, no! I nearly finished! 317 00:26:03,923 --> 00:26:05,583 Crazy-ass Polack. 318 00:26:05,633 --> 00:26:08,468 OK, Rupe, let's light the candles. 319 00:26:08,511 --> 00:26:13,220 Corporal, light the invasion beacon! They are on their way. 320 00:26:13,265 --> 00:26:15,258 Yes, Major. Light the beacon! 321 00:26:22,566 --> 00:26:24,606 It's the beacon at Whitehall! 322 00:26:24,652 --> 00:26:26,395 Light the beacon! 323 00:26:36,205 --> 00:26:37,949 What's that? 324 00:26:37,999 --> 00:26:39,197 Blimey. 325 00:26:40,459 --> 00:26:42,915 It's the beacon at Crystal Palace! 326 00:26:43,671 --> 00:26:47,289 Fire the beacon, lads! It's the invasion! 327 00:26:51,095 --> 00:26:53,800 The beacon at Croydon's been lit, sir! 328 00:27:23,294 --> 00:27:26,994 Father, look! It's the invasion beacon at Maidstone. 329 00:27:27,048 --> 00:27:28,458 They've come. 330 00:27:29,467 --> 00:27:31,792 It's the invasion. Look! 331 00:27:32,887 --> 00:27:34,879 Light the beacon, Albert. 332 00:27:34,930 --> 00:27:37,089 Back to the village, lads. There ain't much time. 333 00:27:41,145 --> 00:27:42,888 Sacre bleu! 334 00:27:45,775 --> 00:27:48,776 Take up your positions, men! 335 00:27:49,528 --> 00:27:52,280 Come on, you guys, get that MG movin'. 336 00:27:52,323 --> 00:27:54,446 We've got ourselves a war to win! 337 00:27:54,492 --> 00:27:57,446 All right, commie assholes, 338 00:27:57,495 --> 00:28:00,164 it's time to hammer down the sickle. 339 00:28:00,206 --> 00:28:01,534 Got it, I've got it. 340 00:28:01,582 --> 00:28:04,156 - Quiet, quiet, it's the news. 341 00:28:04,210 --> 00:28:07,460 This is the BBC Home Service. 342 00:28:07,505 --> 00:28:10,375 Here is the news at 12 o'clock. 343 00:28:10,424 --> 00:28:13,758 The German army has invaded London. 344 00:28:13,803 --> 00:28:17,468 I repeat. The German army has invaded London. 345 00:28:17,515 --> 00:28:19,554 London! I don't believe it. 346 00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:22,305 Why can't they stay in their own country? 347 00:28:22,353 --> 00:28:25,058 The Prime Minister will now make a speech 348 00:28:25,106 --> 00:28:27,941 from the Cabinet War Rooms in Downing Street. 349 00:28:27,984 --> 00:28:30,142 My dear countrymen, 350 00:28:30,194 --> 00:28:32,187 my dear friends. 351 00:28:32,238 --> 00:28:36,318 Never in the field of human conflict 352 00:28:36,367 --> 00:28:38,324 was so much 353 00:28:38,369 --> 00:28:41,785 buggered up by so few for so many. 354 00:28:41,831 --> 00:28:45,330 - This isl... 355 00:28:45,376 --> 00:28:47,333 What's wrong with it? 356 00:28:47,378 --> 00:28:50,165 Germany calling, Germany calling. 357 00:28:50,214 --> 00:28:51,922 Hello, Englanders! 358 00:28:51,966 --> 00:28:54,753 Zis is ze voice of ze Nazis! 359 00:28:54,802 --> 00:28:58,467 Ze whole of ze BBC are now dead. 360 00:28:58,514 --> 00:29:02,179 We have successfully invaded your capital city of London, 361 00:29:02,226 --> 00:29:04,800 und are ready to capture your beloved prime minister, 362 00:29:04,854 --> 00:29:08,389 Herr Winston Churchill, from Downing Strasse - oh, ja - 363 00:29:08,441 --> 00:29:12,141 who we have a very special message for. 364 00:29:12,194 --> 00:29:15,314 Do not hide. We will find you. 365 00:29:15,364 --> 00:29:18,199 You are as good as captured... 366 00:29:18,242 --> 00:29:19,357 fat boy. 367 00:29:19,410 --> 00:29:22,696 No one can escape ze Third Reich! 368 00:29:25,499 --> 00:29:28,536 ... that is all I have to say on the matter. 369 00:29:28,586 --> 00:29:31,207 Apart from my elite Punjabi guards, 370 00:29:31,255 --> 00:29:35,087 we have absolutely no military defence whatsoever. 371 00:29:36,218 --> 00:29:41,805 Therefore I ask any of you who are in any way able to come to our aid, 372 00:29:41,849 --> 00:29:44,601 - to do so immediately. - We're buggered. 373 00:29:44,644 --> 00:29:47,977 When I give the order, we should retreat to... 374 00:29:49,065 --> 00:29:50,891 Where should we retreat to, Monty? 375 00:29:50,941 --> 00:29:52,601 How the hell should I know? 376 00:29:52,652 --> 00:29:54,644 Retreat to, er... 377 00:29:54,695 --> 00:29:56,771 Retreat to... 378 00:30:13,089 --> 00:30:15,710 ...Scot Land. 379 00:30:15,758 --> 00:30:17,418 The Land of the Scots?! 380 00:30:17,468 --> 00:30:23,174 But, sir, the... the Scots are hordes of murderous blood-drinking savages. 381 00:30:23,224 --> 00:30:26,807 Retreat to Scot Land. 382 00:30:26,852 --> 00:30:29,178 Head north to Hadrian's Wall. 383 00:30:30,189 --> 00:30:32,810 Good luck, and God save us all. 384 00:30:34,026 --> 00:30:36,600 - Should we go to Scot Land? 385 00:30:38,823 --> 00:30:40,815 Scot Land? 386 00:30:40,866 --> 00:30:42,064 Hadrian's Wall? 387 00:30:42,118 --> 00:30:44,359 Surrender seems to be our only option. 388 00:30:44,412 --> 00:30:47,578 You hear that? They're talking about surrender. 389 00:30:47,623 --> 00:30:51,491 I've never been to London. Where is it? Let's go back to the pub. 390 00:30:51,544 --> 00:30:54,331 - Father, they're leaving. - Stay and fight! 391 00:30:54,380 --> 00:30:56,705 - Be more like the foreigner. - Like who? 392 00:30:56,757 --> 00:30:58,465 The foreigner. Him. 393 00:31:01,637 --> 00:31:04,307 That's my wife! 394 00:31:04,348 --> 00:31:06,673 - Who's he? - Found him down on the beach. 395 00:31:06,726 --> 00:31:10,558 La guerre? Je vive pour la guerre! 396 00:31:10,604 --> 00:31:14,353 - Resistance fighter, no doubt. - Tu deconnes ou quoi? 397 00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:16,274 Je m'appelle Gaston Le Roq! 398 00:31:17,486 --> 00:31:19,278 Je suis francais! 399 00:31:19,322 --> 00:31:21,528 Ah, sod this, I'm off home. 400 00:31:21,574 --> 00:31:24,065 You'll have no homes left to go back to. 401 00:31:24,118 --> 00:31:27,404 - What's wrong with you all? - Chris? 402 00:31:27,455 --> 00:31:30,574 Have you forgotten what being English means? 403 00:31:30,625 --> 00:31:32,701 It means being free. 404 00:31:32,752 --> 00:31:36,749 I might just be a simple farm boy, but at least I'm a free simple farm boy. 405 00:31:36,797 --> 00:31:39,039 What does freedom mean to you? 406 00:31:39,091 --> 00:31:43,041 Freedom to grow your own crops and graze livestock. 407 00:31:43,095 --> 00:31:45,586 Think what they'll do to your farms. 408 00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:47,549 Your cows, Farmer Grey. 409 00:31:47,600 --> 00:31:49,758 Your pigs, Mr and Mrs Sparrow. 410 00:31:49,810 --> 00:31:51,186 I've got a ferret. 411 00:31:51,228 --> 00:31:54,016 Think what will happy to your FANY, Matron Rutty. 412 00:31:54,065 --> 00:31:55,891 Join me... 413 00:31:55,941 --> 00:31:59,227 so that in future years you can proudly say, 414 00:31:59,278 --> 00:32:00,938 "I fought for England!" 415 00:32:00,988 --> 00:32:02,780 Now who is with me? 416 00:32:09,413 --> 00:32:12,829 Are you ready for a war? 417 00:32:12,875 --> 00:32:15,627 We got no guns. 418 00:32:15,670 --> 00:32:18,754 He's right, Christopher. We used up all our weapons against that zeppelin. 419 00:32:18,798 --> 00:32:20,506 Huh? Pas de probleme. 420 00:32:25,096 --> 00:32:26,720 - Merde. 421 00:32:26,764 --> 00:32:28,139 Voila. 422 00:32:28,182 --> 00:32:31,349 All right, you fuckers, 423 00:32:31,394 --> 00:32:33,517 arm yourselves! 424 00:32:36,941 --> 00:32:39,099 Wow, Chris, when did you get so tough? 425 00:32:39,151 --> 00:32:40,610 Phew, I like it. 426 00:32:40,653 --> 00:32:42,811 The army won't be able to hold out for long. 427 00:32:42,863 --> 00:32:46,529 We need to get to London. It's not far, we can make it if we move now. 428 00:32:46,575 --> 00:32:50,443 Don't be bloody ridiculous, boy. How do you propose we get there? 429 00:32:50,496 --> 00:32:52,239 On old Betty. 430 00:32:53,374 --> 00:32:55,201 - Bastard! 431 00:33:03,092 --> 00:33:05,215 TNT, up the line! 432 00:33:05,261 --> 00:33:06,803 I am coming, Sahib! 433 00:33:07,388 --> 00:33:10,305 Pack as much TNT into the barricades as you can. 434 00:33:10,349 --> 00:33:15,177 These firecrackers will bust their German bottoms right back to Berlin! 435 00:33:19,483 --> 00:33:21,559 Achtung! Achtung! 436 00:33:21,610 --> 00:33:25,026 All units, proceed towards Downing Street 437 00:33:25,072 --> 00:33:28,904 und take out ze number ten house. 438 00:33:28,951 --> 00:33:32,700 ... Downing Strasse. 439 00:33:45,134 --> 00:33:49,048 All of you FANYs go with Tom, make your way to Hadrian's Wall. 440 00:33:49,096 --> 00:33:51,385 We're heading for London! 441 00:33:51,432 --> 00:33:55,596 Just keep your big hands off my daughter, boy. 442 00:34:06,864 --> 00:34:10,399 It's time to take out the Russky trash. 443 00:34:10,451 --> 00:34:12,574 You mean Nazi trash! 444 00:34:20,628 --> 00:34:22,786 I am frightened, Sahib. 445 00:34:22,838 --> 00:34:24,582 Stay close to me. 446 00:34:28,636 --> 00:34:32,586 A lot of people are going to die today. 447 00:34:47,613 --> 00:34:49,321 Fire! 448 00:34:54,161 --> 00:34:56,735 Tank coming! Left flank! 449 00:35:06,799 --> 00:35:09,468 Hey! I'm working here! 450 00:35:19,103 --> 00:35:21,890 MG-42, right flank. 451 00:35:21,939 --> 00:35:23,896 Get some! 452 00:35:23,941 --> 00:35:27,476 Fall back! Fall back to the second barricade, men! 453 00:35:27,528 --> 00:35:29,770 Fall back! 454 00:35:50,968 --> 00:35:52,379 Oops. 455 00:35:54,472 --> 00:35:58,600 Gott im Himmel! We must take out ze number ten house! 456 00:35:58,643 --> 00:36:01,727 That is where ze dog Churchill is hiding. 457 00:36:01,771 --> 00:36:03,313 Take it out! 458 00:36:03,356 --> 00:36:05,728 Jawohl, Herr Obergruppenfuhrer. 459 00:36:09,487 --> 00:36:13,864 Oi! Wrong bleedin' 'ouse! Churchill's next door! 460 00:36:13,908 --> 00:36:15,616 You missed! 461 00:36:15,660 --> 00:36:17,533 Number ten house! 462 00:36:17,578 --> 00:36:19,903 Not ze number nine house, 463 00:36:19,956 --> 00:36:22,197 ze number ten house! 464 00:36:22,249 --> 00:36:23,993 Number ten house. Fire! 465 00:36:27,922 --> 00:36:31,291 Schweinhunds! Missed again! 466 00:36:31,342 --> 00:36:36,502 Not ze number eleven house, not ze number nine house - 467 00:36:36,555 --> 00:36:39,889 ze one in the middle, number ten! 468 00:36:42,228 --> 00:36:44,434 We're approaching London. 469 00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:46,140 Full steam ahead! 470 00:36:47,984 --> 00:36:50,653 Oh, I say. 471 00:36:58,119 --> 00:37:00,954 Fall back, men. I'm going to blow the barricades. 472 00:37:04,625 --> 00:37:08,160 I cannot lift you, sir. You're just too heavy. 473 00:37:08,212 --> 00:37:12,292 Buddy, we got about ten seconds before these barricades pop. 474 00:37:12,341 --> 00:37:15,793 But Sergeant Erummel is the heaviest soldier in the Punjab. 475 00:37:15,845 --> 00:37:17,636 No man can lift him. 476 00:37:17,680 --> 00:37:20,171 I grew up liftin' redwoods in South Dakota. 477 00:37:20,224 --> 00:37:23,889 No little Injun's gonna weigh Billy Fiske down. I got ya, buddy. 478 00:37:27,231 --> 00:37:29,188 Never leave a man behind! 479 00:37:29,233 --> 00:37:31,060 Fiske! Get out of there! 480 00:37:34,739 --> 00:37:36,447 Don't leave me! 481 00:37:38,701 --> 00:37:40,409 Home run! 482 00:37:40,453 --> 00:37:42,825 Whoa, that was intense, Billy Fiske. 483 00:37:42,872 --> 00:37:45,445 Hell, that's what all the gals say. 484 00:37:45,499 --> 00:37:46,910 Everybody, take cover. 485 00:37:46,959 --> 00:37:49,913 - Fire in the hole! - Fire in the hole! 486 00:37:52,798 --> 00:37:54,590 Yee-ha! 487 00:38:00,222 --> 00:38:05,430 What the hell are those blasted Punjabis doing up there? 488 00:38:05,478 --> 00:38:08,051 Nearly brought down the whole bloody house. 489 00:38:08,105 --> 00:38:11,937 You, uh... You think you used enough dynamite there, buddy? 490 00:38:20,534 --> 00:38:23,286 It has not stopped them! 491 00:38:23,329 --> 00:38:25,998 Unless we get through that wall, Mr Churchill is finished. 492 00:38:26,040 --> 00:38:28,531 - Hey, what's that sound? 493 00:38:30,336 --> 00:38:33,372 Oh, they're attacking from both bloody ends! 494 00:38:38,844 --> 00:38:41,252 Holy balls on a buffalo! 495 00:38:41,305 --> 00:38:44,508 We're here to rescue Mr Churchill. 496 00:38:44,558 --> 00:38:46,551 Well, just in the nick of bloody time too. 497 00:38:46,602 --> 00:38:48,595 Get into the house! Go, go, go! 498 00:38:48,646 --> 00:38:50,021 I hear ya, Rupee. 499 00:38:50,648 --> 00:38:51,810 Door breach! 500 00:38:53,609 --> 00:38:55,732 Let's go rescue the President. 501 00:38:55,778 --> 00:38:59,692 - Now what? Who the devil are you, sirs? - Prime Minister! 502 00:38:59,740 --> 00:39:03,489 - We've come to rescue you, sir. - Billy Fiske, American Volunteers. 503 00:39:03,536 --> 00:39:07,403 They brought some crazy-ass war machine to bust you outta here. 504 00:39:07,456 --> 00:39:11,240 Aha! Finally a chance to face Fritz. 505 00:39:11,294 --> 00:39:12,622 Sir, you'll need a gun. 506 00:39:12,670 --> 00:39:15,161 - No problem. Monty? - Yes, sir! 507 00:39:17,967 --> 00:39:21,300 Aha! A little cubbyhole. 508 00:39:21,345 --> 00:39:24,631 Mum's the word, eh, lads? Wife doesn't know. 509 00:39:28,311 --> 00:39:30,718 Shall we, gentlemen? 510 00:39:30,771 --> 00:39:32,764 - Follow me! - Move, move! 511 00:39:34,942 --> 00:39:36,851 We need to get past those tanks. 512 00:39:36,902 --> 00:39:39,607 If we stay here, we're trapped like rats in a barrel. 513 00:39:40,281 --> 00:39:42,108 Oh-ho! 514 00:39:42,742 --> 00:39:44,615 Eat hot lead, Fritz! 515 00:39:48,456 --> 00:39:51,659 Look what you've done to me wall, you young hooligan! 516 00:39:51,709 --> 00:39:53,998 Sorry, sir! Daisy, let's go, come on. 517 00:39:54,045 --> 00:39:56,999 That's your ticket out of here. Get on, Winston! 518 00:39:57,048 --> 00:39:59,918 Mr President, you gotta get your ass outta here. 519 00:39:59,967 --> 00:40:00,998 Allez! 520 00:40:01,052 --> 00:40:03,839 There's not enough power! We need to get more steam into her. 521 00:40:03,888 --> 00:40:06,593 Do something, boy! 522 00:40:06,641 --> 00:40:10,341 Coal! We need to build up the pressure until she hits 150, 523 00:40:10,394 --> 00:40:12,387 then yank down on the handbrake! 524 00:40:12,438 --> 00:40:15,355 Don't let her hit 160 or she'll blow! 525 00:40:15,399 --> 00:40:17,107 Right, Chris. 526 00:40:20,279 --> 00:40:23,031 Get zis turret working! 527 00:40:30,414 --> 00:40:32,206 Pressure... thirty. 528 00:40:32,249 --> 00:40:34,372 More coal! Come on, come on! 529 00:40:34,418 --> 00:40:36,126 Faster, faster! 530 00:40:39,173 --> 00:40:40,632 Sixty! 531 00:40:42,176 --> 00:40:45,212 Hey! Stop! Stop! 532 00:40:45,262 --> 00:40:47,469 He's stuck. The bastard's stuck. 533 00:40:47,515 --> 00:40:48,973 Schweinhunds! 534 00:40:49,016 --> 00:40:51,970 No, no, I not finish yet! 535 00:40:52,019 --> 00:40:54,261 Come on, come on! 536 00:40:54,313 --> 00:40:57,978 Schnell, schnell! He's getting away! 537 00:40:58,025 --> 00:40:59,104 Eins, zwei... 538 00:41:00,361 --> 00:41:01,736 ...vier, funf... 539 00:41:02,780 --> 00:41:04,737 Pressure... a hundred and ten! 540 00:41:04,782 --> 00:41:06,739 ...zehn, elf... 541 00:41:06,784 --> 00:41:08,112 ...vierzehn... 542 00:41:08,786 --> 00:41:10,743 ...achtzehn... - A hundred and twenty! 543 00:41:15,042 --> 00:41:17,913 Destroy zat steam engine! 544 00:41:17,962 --> 00:41:20,251 One hundred and thirty! 545 00:41:20,298 --> 00:41:23,749 - We're nearly there! - Pressure... one hundred and fifty! 546 00:41:23,801 --> 00:41:25,675 Now! Fire! 547 00:41:26,804 --> 00:41:29,473 Incoming! 548 00:41:34,353 --> 00:41:36,642 London is ours! 549 00:42:06,636 --> 00:42:08,794 I wanna go 'ome. 550 00:42:10,514 --> 00:42:13,088 Ja, das Ritz Cafe - 551 00:42:13,142 --> 00:42:15,431 das Fritz Cafe! 552 00:42:20,858 --> 00:42:23,894 So where shall we go now, Herr Goering? 553 00:42:23,944 --> 00:42:27,527 - Our new home! - Yoo-hoo! 554 00:42:27,573 --> 00:42:31,072 Forward to Buckingham Palace! 555 00:42:55,184 --> 00:43:00,226 Ahem. Er, excuse me, but this happens to be my house. 556 00:43:01,983 --> 00:43:03,975 Take him to ze Tower of London! 557 00:43:04,026 --> 00:43:08,937 - You fools! You bloody fools! 558 00:43:08,990 --> 00:43:11,196 Don't you realise? 559 00:43:11,242 --> 00:43:14,112 I'm three-quarters German! 560 00:43:25,256 --> 00:43:26,798 They're burning London. 561 00:43:26,841 --> 00:43:30,292 Our great city has suffered much this day. 562 00:43:30,344 --> 00:43:34,556 Only Nazi scum would stoop so low! 563 00:44:34,200 --> 00:44:37,035 - Chris. - Oh. Morning, Daisy. 564 00:44:37,078 --> 00:44:39,319 Chris, you've been driving all night. 565 00:44:39,372 --> 00:44:43,500 - Why didn't you sleep? - I didn't want to waste time. 566 00:44:43,542 --> 00:44:45,618 Aren't you cold? I've got a blanket if you... 567 00:44:45,670 --> 00:44:48,243 No, I'm all right. The fire's still blazing. 568 00:44:49,465 --> 00:44:53,878 It's so calm and peaceful. You wouldn't think there was a war going on. 569 00:44:54,971 --> 00:44:58,802 Yeah, it's, er... it's pretty beautiful, isn't it? 570 00:44:58,849 --> 00:45:01,008 You've done so much, Chris, 571 00:45:01,060 --> 00:45:03,765 so much for England. 572 00:45:07,900 --> 00:45:12,645 Ah, what a wonderful morning the Good Lord has brought us, 573 00:45:12,697 --> 00:45:15,900 eh, bastard? 574 00:45:15,950 --> 00:45:20,411 Ah, time for breakfast and a nice cigar. 575 00:45:20,454 --> 00:45:24,915 I wonder how Major Rupee and the Punjabis got out of London. 576 00:45:40,641 --> 00:45:44,010 Yo, Indians! I got me some new wings! 577 00:45:44,061 --> 00:45:46,469 Race ya to Hadrian's Wall! 578 00:45:46,522 --> 00:45:49,013 Whoo-hoo! 579 00:46:11,130 --> 00:46:12,838 What is this place? 580 00:46:12,882 --> 00:46:16,132 The remains of the Lost Legion. 581 00:46:16,177 --> 00:46:18,216 In the final years of his rule, 582 00:46:18,262 --> 00:46:23,054 Roman emperor Hadrian sent troops to the outer borders of England. 583 00:46:24,060 --> 00:46:26,348 They never returned. 584 00:46:26,395 --> 00:46:29,313 This is their tomb. 585 00:46:45,373 --> 00:46:48,457 Hadrian's Wall. Look, Daisy! 586 00:47:02,098 --> 00:47:04,505 It's a bloody miracle. 587 00:47:09,063 --> 00:47:11,850 Open the gates, lad! Open the gates! 588 00:47:11,899 --> 00:47:12,978 Open the gates! 589 00:47:13,025 --> 00:47:15,481 It's Chris, and Prime Minister Churchill! 590 00:47:15,528 --> 00:47:18,019 They made it! Bring 'em in, lads. 591 00:47:18,072 --> 00:47:22,734 Whoo-ee! Now that's what I call American spirit. 592 00:47:22,785 --> 00:47:25,074 We have arrived. 593 00:47:25,121 --> 00:47:28,537 'Tis a great feat of English endurance. 594 00:47:28,582 --> 00:47:31,252 But endurance breeds appetite. 595 00:47:31,293 --> 00:47:34,413 So tonight we feast! 596 00:47:41,554 --> 00:47:44,887 There certainly is an abundance of young females, eh? 597 00:47:46,767 --> 00:47:49,519 Hey, Rupes, she's lookin' at ya. 598 00:47:49,562 --> 00:47:51,804 Oh, she looks dirty. 599 00:47:51,856 --> 00:47:54,181 Back in '79... 600 00:47:54,233 --> 00:47:59,358 and there I was, out of ammunition and surrounded. 601 00:47:59,405 --> 00:48:01,563 Fuzzies everywhere. 602 00:48:01,615 --> 00:48:03,608 Oh, such bravery! 603 00:48:03,659 --> 00:48:07,443 Look, everyone's here. It's a miracle we all made it. 604 00:48:07,496 --> 00:48:09,156 That's right, Christopher. 605 00:48:10,082 --> 00:48:13,202 Dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. 606 00:48:13,252 --> 00:48:15,043 Mr Churchill? 607 00:48:16,213 --> 00:48:18,787 A lost soul on the eve of battle. 608 00:48:19,884 --> 00:48:22,090 Go and see if he's all right, lad. 609 00:48:30,686 --> 00:48:33,142 Hello? Mr Churchill? 610 00:48:33,981 --> 00:48:35,440 Hello? 611 00:49:29,286 --> 00:49:31,078 Albert. Albert, look down there. 612 00:49:31,122 --> 00:49:32,830 A basket. 613 00:49:32,873 --> 00:49:36,124 - What is it, Tom? - Albert, it's a baby. 614 00:49:37,795 --> 00:49:40,998 There, there, young 'un, it's all right, don't cry. Uncle Tom's here. 615 00:49:41,048 --> 00:49:44,133 What is this thing? 616 00:49:44,176 --> 00:49:48,008 It's only a baby, Vicar, we found him in the reeds there. 617 00:49:48,055 --> 00:49:52,100 Ah, that is no mortal child. Look at the bastard's hands. 618 00:49:52,143 --> 00:49:53,720 The sign of Lucifer. 619 00:49:53,769 --> 00:49:56,640 Tie a stone round its neck, and cast it back into the river. 620 00:49:56,689 --> 00:49:58,231 Rid us of its evil! 621 00:49:58,274 --> 00:50:00,065 I think I'll call him Christopher. 622 00:50:00,109 --> 00:50:02,980 Do as you wish, but be it on your eternal souls. 623 00:50:03,029 --> 00:50:06,279 I shall not baptise that creature. He is one of them! 624 00:50:07,283 --> 00:50:11,779 - Them? - Them. Them from the North. 625 00:50:33,309 --> 00:50:35,100 Ah, Mr Churchill. 626 00:50:35,144 --> 00:50:38,394 Old uniforms, sir. Must be left over from years ago. 627 00:50:38,439 --> 00:50:41,191 Aha, the old 42nd. 628 00:50:41,942 --> 00:50:46,071 They were posted up here under the command of the Duke of Wellington. 629 00:50:46,113 --> 00:50:48,865 See to it that they are distributed amongst the men. 630 00:50:48,908 --> 00:50:50,651 Yes, sir. 631 00:50:50,701 --> 00:50:54,402 - 'Ere, squire, look at my jacket. - That won't fit you. 632 00:50:54,455 --> 00:50:57,028 Nice, innit? Nice bit of fabric, that, yeah. 633 00:50:57,083 --> 00:50:59,787 Hey, nice uniforms, guys! 634 00:51:03,422 --> 00:51:08,001 Christopher, I must thank you for saving my life. 635 00:51:08,052 --> 00:51:10,175 You would make a fine soldier. 636 00:51:10,221 --> 00:51:13,839 Well, the government don't think so. They reckon my hands are too big. 637 00:51:13,891 --> 00:51:16,464 And... (Chuckles)... well... 638 00:51:16,519 --> 00:51:18,096 they are pretty big. 639 00:51:18,145 --> 00:51:21,810 The government? I am the government. 640 00:51:21,857 --> 00:51:25,357 And so, from this day on, you are a soldier 641 00:51:25,403 --> 00:51:27,027 in His Majesty's forces. 642 00:51:27,071 --> 00:51:30,689 Oh, thank you, sir, thank you so much. I won't let you down, I promise. 643 00:51:30,741 --> 00:51:32,070 I'm counting on it. 644 00:51:32,118 --> 00:51:34,822 The battle for London is over. 645 00:51:34,870 --> 00:51:38,322 The battle for England is about to begin. 646 00:51:38,374 --> 00:51:39,405 Mr Churchill! 647 00:51:39,458 --> 00:51:42,874 Mr Churchill, Chris! Look at the sky! 648 00:51:43,838 --> 00:51:47,918 Aha, aurora borealis. The northern lights. 649 00:51:49,051 --> 00:51:52,835 Lts name comes from the Roman goddess of dawn. 650 00:51:52,888 --> 00:51:55,011 Ancient Norse mythology suggests 651 00:51:55,057 --> 00:51:58,509 that the light came from the Valkyries riding through the sky, 652 00:51:58,561 --> 00:52:01,562 collecting the dead from the battlefields, 653 00:52:01,605 --> 00:52:05,354 but it's little more than an atmospheric phenomenon, 654 00:52:05,401 --> 00:52:08,437 though rather spectacular, I must say. 655 00:52:09,655 --> 00:52:11,280 Isn't it beautiful, Chris? 656 00:52:12,700 --> 00:52:14,574 Yes, it is. 657 00:52:16,495 --> 00:52:20,445 But... (Chuckles)... tonight is not the night for you two to be listening 658 00:52:20,499 --> 00:52:22,575 to the ramblings of an old man. 659 00:52:24,754 --> 00:52:26,746 Shall we go somewhere else? 660 00:52:45,858 --> 00:52:48,812 You know, I've always loved you, Daisy. 661 00:52:50,905 --> 00:52:54,108 - Oh, my gosh. 662 00:53:20,309 --> 00:53:23,144 We brought Christmas early! 663 00:53:26,399 --> 00:53:29,684 London is ours! Jawohl! 664 00:53:32,905 --> 00:53:34,779 Ooh, ooh! Ohhh! 665 00:53:36,033 --> 00:53:39,651 - Goebbels, my Liebling! 666 00:53:42,164 --> 00:53:44,453 - Da-daaa! 667 00:53:44,500 --> 00:53:47,335 Well, hello, boys. It's me! 668 00:53:47,378 --> 00:53:48,789 Heil Hitler! 669 00:53:48,838 --> 00:53:52,538 What do you think? Lovely fabric, isn't it? Feel it, feel it. 670 00:53:52,591 --> 00:53:55,129 You look fabulous, mein Fuhrer. 671 00:53:55,177 --> 00:53:57,965 I'm so sorry. If we'd only known of your arrival. 672 00:53:58,014 --> 00:54:01,217 Oh, you didn't think I would miss zis, did you? 673 00:54:01,267 --> 00:54:05,311 A fancy-dress party in the Palace of Buckingham? 674 00:54:05,354 --> 00:54:09,981 Now tell me, Mr Himmy-Himmy-Himmler, what have you all been up to? 675 00:54:10,026 --> 00:54:13,026 Ooh, well, mein Fuhrer, since you have been in Paris, 676 00:54:13,070 --> 00:54:15,822 a most excellent accomplishment has been achieved. 677 00:54:15,865 --> 00:54:18,616 Up until recently, mein Fuhrer, 678 00:54:18,659 --> 00:54:23,036 ze Englander underground was a complete and utter shambles. 679 00:54:23,080 --> 00:54:26,366 More like a spaghetti than a functional railway, mein Fuhrer. 680 00:54:26,417 --> 00:54:29,667 Zis better be going somewhere. I got an early flight from Versailles for zis. 681 00:54:31,922 --> 00:54:34,129 You're going to love zis. 682 00:54:35,718 --> 00:54:36,998 Da-daaa! 683 00:54:37,053 --> 00:54:42,260 We have brought efficiency to ze London Unterground! 684 00:54:42,308 --> 00:54:45,558 All lines lead to der Vaterland. 685 00:54:45,603 --> 00:54:49,387 I may have ze body of a weak und feeble Nazi, 686 00:54:49,440 --> 00:54:51,812 but I do have a really big... 687 00:54:51,859 --> 00:54:53,768 Luger! 688 00:54:57,907 --> 00:55:01,951 We did not conquer zis backward country in order to bring it culture and discipline. 689 00:55:01,994 --> 00:55:04,402 We came to capture Herr Winston Churchill. 690 00:55:04,455 --> 00:55:07,456 So why is that cage empty? 691 00:55:07,500 --> 00:55:11,200 You let Churchill get away? Of all ze incompetent, idiotic... 692 00:55:11,253 --> 00:55:12,878 Mobilise ze army north. 693 00:55:12,922 --> 00:55:15,329 Send zem into damn Scot Land if you have to. 694 00:55:15,383 --> 00:55:18,633 - Ah, yes, of course. 695 00:55:18,678 --> 00:55:19,709 Of course. 696 00:55:19,762 --> 00:55:23,807 Zat must be where zey are hiding - the Land of the Scots! 697 00:55:23,849 --> 00:55:25,509 Zey know we would never try to attack 698 00:55:25,559 --> 00:55:29,225 in fear of what lies beyond zat great Hadrian's Wall. 699 00:55:29,271 --> 00:55:31,809 - Scot Land, m-m-mein Fuhrer? 700 00:55:31,857 --> 00:55:34,016 B-b-but ze stories! 701 00:55:34,068 --> 00:55:37,401 Not even ze Romans went beyond ze great Hadrian's Wall. 702 00:55:37,446 --> 00:55:39,772 Who knows what evil lies up there? 703 00:55:39,824 --> 00:55:42,066 Enough! You will attack Scot Land 704 00:55:42,118 --> 00:55:45,035 und capture Herr Winston Churchill... 705 00:55:45,079 --> 00:55:46,324 immediately! 706 00:55:47,832 --> 00:55:49,908 I love you, Hans. 707 00:56:33,085 --> 00:56:34,663 - Sacre bleu! 708 00:56:34,712 --> 00:56:37,464 Stone the bleedin' crows! 709 00:56:37,506 --> 00:56:40,958 Awake, man-slobs. We have a war to win. 710 00:56:41,010 --> 00:56:43,086 Huh? 711 00:56:43,137 --> 00:56:46,423 Well, I drank four pints of sherry. 712 00:56:46,474 --> 00:56:50,768 - Heh! It was a damn fine evening. - Wakey-wakey, boys, rise and shine. 713 00:56:50,811 --> 00:56:52,851 Stand to, men. 714 00:56:52,897 --> 00:56:54,889 Eyes front! 715 00:56:54,940 --> 00:56:56,814 Straighten up that line. 716 00:56:56,859 --> 00:56:58,899 Good morning, Rupee. 717 00:56:58,944 --> 00:57:00,604 Ah, Churchill Sahib. 718 00:57:00,655 --> 00:57:02,777 Your men look magnificent. 719 00:57:02,823 --> 00:57:07,532 Thank you, sir. All men present, correct, and uniforms fitting perfectly. 720 00:57:07,578 --> 00:57:11,196 - Morning, Prime Minister! - And a good morning to you, too. 721 00:57:11,248 --> 00:57:13,822 And a fine Highland morning it is too, sir. 722 00:57:13,876 --> 00:57:17,375 Now, Rupee, how are things shaping up? 723 00:57:17,421 --> 00:57:20,208 Ah, well, sir, every farmer in England is here. 724 00:57:20,257 --> 00:57:23,211 I bring my lads from Whitby, North Yorkshire. 725 00:57:23,260 --> 00:57:26,546 The men from Broad Oak, Herefordshire, are ready, Prime Minister. 726 00:57:26,597 --> 00:57:30,180 The Thornthwaite Cumberland boys. Hooray! 727 00:57:30,226 --> 00:57:32,218 Splendid, splendid. 728 00:57:32,269 --> 00:57:34,974 It's not much, but they have a great heart. 729 00:57:35,022 --> 00:57:38,107 The finest of our English agriculture. 730 00:57:38,150 --> 00:57:40,024 The salt of our earth. 731 00:57:40,069 --> 00:57:45,408 Just as Cromwell looked upon his New Model Army at the field of Naseby 732 00:57:45,449 --> 00:57:48,071 in 1645, eh, Rupee? 733 00:57:48,119 --> 00:57:50,195 Er... yes, sir. 734 00:57:50,246 --> 00:57:53,081 We also have an air force. Billy Fiske has rustled up a biplane 735 00:57:53,124 --> 00:57:55,330 and is giving basic flying lessons now. 736 00:57:55,376 --> 00:57:59,539 All right, hot dog, listen up, cos I'm only gonna tell you this once more. 737 00:57:59,588 --> 00:58:01,795 You press that to start the engine, 738 00:58:01,841 --> 00:58:04,213 you press that to fire your guns. 739 00:58:04,260 --> 00:58:07,878 Engines... guns... right. 740 00:58:07,930 --> 00:58:11,844 OK. Now take her up and show me what you got. 741 00:58:11,892 --> 00:58:13,968 Yeah, right. OK. 742 00:58:14,020 --> 00:58:17,685 Third time lucky. Here we go. 743 00:58:17,732 --> 00:58:20,649 And where the blazes do you think you have been? 744 00:58:20,693 --> 00:58:23,813 - Father, I can explain. - No need to explain, young lady! 745 00:58:23,863 --> 00:58:25,690 I understand perfectly. 746 00:58:25,740 --> 00:58:28,112 If you think that being in Scot Land 747 00:58:28,159 --> 00:58:31,076 is a licence to get your fat hands on my daughter, 748 00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:33,326 you've got another thing coming, boy! 749 00:58:33,372 --> 00:58:35,614 - Oh, nuts! 750 00:58:36,250 --> 00:58:38,622 He's doing it again! 751 00:58:39,587 --> 00:58:41,829 Make it stop! 752 00:58:41,881 --> 00:58:42,995 Hey! 753 00:58:43,049 --> 00:58:44,543 - Hey! 754 00:58:44,592 --> 00:58:48,886 Take your finger off the fuckin' fire button! 755 00:58:51,557 --> 00:58:53,265 Er... 756 00:58:53,309 --> 00:58:55,847 Well, looks like he might need a couple more lessons, sir. 757 00:58:55,895 --> 00:58:57,852 Shit. 758 00:58:58,814 --> 00:59:00,854 You stupid bastard! 759 00:59:00,900 --> 00:59:03,984 Looks like I'm your air cover, Mr President. 760 00:59:04,028 --> 00:59:06,982 Ain't no way I can teach these douche bags how to fly. 761 00:59:07,031 --> 00:59:09,320 - Dear, oh dear, oh dear. - Mr Churchill! 762 00:59:09,367 --> 00:59:12,036 - The scouts have just returned, sir. 763 00:59:12,078 --> 00:59:16,656 Reports are of Nazis, thousands of 'em, coming from the South. 764 00:59:16,707 --> 00:59:19,377 So, it begins. 765 00:59:34,392 --> 00:59:36,965 We found this in the cave, sir. 766 00:59:37,019 --> 00:59:39,427 And we managed to salvage these... 767 00:59:39,480 --> 00:59:42,931 old flintlock muskets. Exactly one gun per man. 768 00:59:42,983 --> 00:59:47,028 Splendid. Let us prepare for battle. 769 00:59:47,071 --> 00:59:50,440 Ready, aim, fire. 770 01:00:00,459 --> 01:00:02,119 Yaaah! 771 01:00:12,888 --> 01:00:14,680 Excellent. 772 01:00:15,349 --> 01:00:18,054 Straighten up that line! 773 01:00:18,102 --> 01:00:19,976 Yo, Rupee-doopee. 774 01:00:20,021 --> 01:00:23,021 Never thought I'd see Red Injuns this far from home. 775 01:00:23,065 --> 01:00:26,351 And you tell me, Fiskie-whisky... 776 01:00:26,402 --> 01:00:28,441 why did you travel 5,000 miles 777 01:00:28,487 --> 01:00:31,737 to fight a war that the English ought to be fighting for themselves, hmm? 778 01:00:31,782 --> 01:00:35,116 Hey, look who's talking, pal. 779 01:00:35,161 --> 01:00:36,785 Hmm, good point. 780 01:00:36,829 --> 01:00:40,280 This is our last line of defence. 781 01:00:40,333 --> 01:00:44,377 We will hold them from this wall for as long as possible. 782 01:00:44,420 --> 01:00:47,706 Gaston, Tom, Albert - artillery. 783 01:00:47,757 --> 01:00:49,037 - Yes, sir. - Oui, Monsieur Churchill. 784 01:00:49,091 --> 01:00:50,550 - Rutty? - Prime Minister. 785 01:00:50,593 --> 01:00:53,344 You and Daisy are in command of your FANY. 786 01:00:53,387 --> 01:00:55,261 - Splendid. - Rupee? 787 01:00:55,306 --> 01:00:57,927 - Yes, sir! - You remain in command of your men. 788 01:00:57,975 --> 01:00:59,434 - Thank you, sir! - Fiske. 789 01:00:59,477 --> 01:01:02,394 - You're our air force. - You got it, Mr President. 790 01:01:02,438 --> 01:01:04,561 Now, Christopher. 791 01:01:05,232 --> 01:01:09,610 Two days ago I was an old man, ready for retirement. 792 01:01:09,653 --> 01:01:11,646 I'd given up on the world, 793 01:01:11,697 --> 01:01:14,983 but you rescued me from the boredom and restraint of politics 794 01:01:15,034 --> 01:01:17,655 and gave me the chance for one more fight. 795 01:01:18,704 --> 01:01:22,488 Now I'm asking you to help us again. 796 01:01:22,541 --> 01:01:25,495 Head north into uncharted territory, 797 01:01:25,544 --> 01:01:27,288 find whatever is out there, 798 01:01:27,338 --> 01:01:31,383 and bring them back here to aid us in our struggle for victory. 799 01:01:32,635 --> 01:01:35,505 I am asking you this as a soldier. 800 01:01:35,554 --> 01:01:38,472 As a soldier, I accept, Mr Churchill. 801 01:01:38,516 --> 01:01:39,547 Good man. 802 01:01:39,600 --> 01:01:43,432 I cannot underestimate the importance of your success. 803 01:01:43,479 --> 01:01:46,350 The future of our civilisation, 804 01:01:46,399 --> 01:01:47,561 and my pension, 805 01:01:47,608 --> 01:01:49,565 now rests with you. 806 01:01:49,610 --> 01:01:52,896 - You must not fail. - Yes, sir! 807 01:01:52,947 --> 01:01:54,856 Now then... 808 01:01:54,907 --> 01:02:01,325 Mr Hitler knows that they will have to break us on this wall or lose the war. 809 01:02:01,372 --> 01:02:05,370 Let us, therefore, brace ourselves to our duties, 810 01:02:05,418 --> 01:02:08,537 and do as our friend from the United States would 811 01:02:08,587 --> 01:02:10,995 and kick some butt! 812 01:02:16,345 --> 01:02:18,753 Fuckin' A, Mr President. Bravo! 813 01:02:20,141 --> 01:02:22,466 Yeah! Ho-ho! Ha-ha! Ho-ho! 814 01:02:24,103 --> 01:02:26,345 This may be the last time we ever see each other. 815 01:02:26,397 --> 01:02:27,891 Don't say that. 816 01:02:27,940 --> 01:02:30,894 Mr Churchill wouldn't have picked you unless he believed in you. 817 01:02:30,943 --> 01:02:33,149 England believes in you, Chris, 818 01:02:33,195 --> 01:02:36,399 and... I believe in you. 819 01:02:39,452 --> 01:02:41,112 You take care of yourself. 820 01:02:41,162 --> 01:02:43,238 Take this shotgun. 821 01:02:43,289 --> 01:02:45,365 It might be dangerous out there. 822 01:02:55,509 --> 01:02:57,585 I'll see you when I get back. 823 01:03:11,776 --> 01:03:13,852 I love you, Chris. 824 01:03:16,197 --> 01:03:17,857 I love you. 825 01:03:26,916 --> 01:03:28,659 Raus! Schnell! 826 01:03:50,022 --> 01:03:52,347 That's funny. Sounds like... 827 01:03:52,400 --> 01:03:54,309 like a train. 828 01:04:13,921 --> 01:04:15,380 Bloody 'ell. 829 01:04:27,935 --> 01:04:30,722 Shit. Communists. 830 01:04:30,771 --> 01:04:32,811 For the last time, Billy Fiske, 831 01:04:32,857 --> 01:04:35,182 these are not communists. 832 01:04:35,234 --> 01:04:38,270 Yeah? That's what they want you to think. 833 01:04:55,338 --> 01:04:57,377 Er... 834 01:04:57,423 --> 01:04:58,965 Bollocks. 835 01:05:17,026 --> 01:05:22,898 Uh-oh. The thin red line of heroes. 836 01:05:22,948 --> 01:05:25,949 Ooh, I'm so frightened! 837 01:05:25,993 --> 01:05:29,576 Hey, Rupee - here's that 50 bucks I owe ya. 838 01:05:29,622 --> 01:05:32,029 Ah, very decent of you, old friend. 839 01:05:32,083 --> 01:05:35,202 Just thought I'd square up with the house, you know? 840 01:05:36,337 --> 01:05:38,294 Shame you won't get a chance to spend it. 841 01:05:42,093 --> 01:05:45,758 I'm waiting for you, you son of a Nazi whore! 842 01:05:45,805 --> 01:05:47,844 - Father! - Come and fight me! 843 01:05:47,890 --> 01:05:50,761 My god against yours! 844 01:05:50,810 --> 01:05:53,727 Sorry, sir, he must have found his way back to the bottle. 845 01:05:53,771 --> 01:05:56,855 - Good man. - Sausage-eating... 846 01:05:56,899 --> 01:05:58,097 wankers! 847 01:05:58,150 --> 01:06:02,362 Wankers! Wankers! Wankers! Wankers! 848 01:06:02,405 --> 01:06:04,896 Let us take example from the Church. 849 01:06:04,949 --> 01:06:07,025 Double the ale ration! 850 01:06:07,076 --> 01:06:08,867 Two pints per man. 851 01:06:08,911 --> 01:06:11,069 Sir. Double the ale ration! 852 01:06:11,122 --> 01:06:13,245 Two pints per man. 853 01:06:13,290 --> 01:06:16,327 Come on, lads. Drink her right down. 854 01:06:24,969 --> 01:06:27,804 And did those feet 855 01:06:27,847 --> 01:06:30,931 In ancient time 856 01:06:30,975 --> 01:06:36,764 Walk upon England's mountain green? 857 01:06:36,814 --> 01:06:42,769 And was the holy land of God 858 01:06:42,820 --> 01:06:48,159 On England's pleasant pastures seen? 859 01:06:48,200 --> 01:06:54,737 - That's it! Sing! Sing! - And did the countenance divine 860 01:06:54,790 --> 01:07:00,829 Shine forth upon our clouded hills? 861 01:07:00,880 --> 01:07:04,296 And was Jerusalem 862 01:07:04,342 --> 01:07:06,714 Builded here 863 01:07:06,761 --> 01:07:12,431 Among those dark satanic mills? 864 01:07:12,475 --> 01:07:16,472 Yes, those dark satanic mills! 865 01:07:21,901 --> 01:07:28,271 Bring me my bow of burning gold! 866 01:07:28,324 --> 01:07:33,864 Bring me my arrows of desire! 867 01:07:33,913 --> 01:07:36,368 Bring me my spear! 868 01:07:36,415 --> 01:07:38,787 O clouds, unfold! 869 01:07:38,834 --> 01:07:42,618 - Now, Rupee! - Present at 100 yards! 870 01:07:42,672 --> 01:07:43,917 Right, here we go! 871 01:07:45,925 --> 01:07:51,797 I will not cease from mental fight 872 01:07:51,847 --> 01:07:57,767 Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand 873 01:07:57,812 --> 01:08:04,146 Till we have built Jerusalem 874 01:08:04,193 --> 01:08:13,150 In England's green and pleasant land 875 01:08:13,202 --> 01:08:15,527 Now, Rupee! Fire! 876 01:08:15,579 --> 01:08:17,572 Fire! 877 01:08:23,921 --> 01:08:26,246 Take that, Fritz! 878 01:08:30,803 --> 01:08:33,175 Come and get it, you little prick! 879 01:08:34,473 --> 01:08:35,968 Got one! 880 01:08:36,017 --> 01:08:37,926 Fire the catapult! 881 01:08:37,977 --> 01:08:39,471 Allez! 882 01:08:40,896 --> 01:08:42,177 - Ow! - Oh, my foot! 883 01:08:42,231 --> 01:08:43,429 Ahh! 884 01:10:04,689 --> 01:10:09,896 No, wait! No! Nooooo! 885 01:10:10,695 --> 01:10:12,771 Hold hard, men! 886 01:10:12,822 --> 01:10:15,110 Achtung! Raus! 887 01:10:15,157 --> 01:10:17,280 We cannot hold it! 888 01:10:17,326 --> 01:10:18,986 Pouring hot oil! 889 01:10:19,412 --> 01:10:21,238 Nein! Nein! 890 01:10:21,288 --> 01:10:24,492 - 'Ave some o' that. - It's so oily und hot! 891 01:10:27,545 --> 01:10:29,454 You fuckers! 892 01:10:35,720 --> 01:10:37,463 Burn... 893 01:10:37,513 --> 01:10:41,012 in the fires of Beelzebub! 894 01:10:41,058 --> 01:10:44,641 - What is this? Foul play? 895 01:10:44,687 --> 01:10:49,230 Fear not. We shall hold off ze attack until dawn. 896 01:10:49,275 --> 01:10:53,023 Then Heidi and Helga will lead ze attack. 897 01:10:54,905 --> 01:10:57,194 Hello, girls! 898 01:11:16,719 --> 01:11:18,877 Gates reinforced now, Prime Minister. 899 01:11:19,930 --> 01:11:23,346 We are now truly subject to Mother Nature. 900 01:11:25,936 --> 01:11:27,929 Bloody English weather. 901 01:11:27,980 --> 01:11:30,471 - You know, Daisy, 902 01:11:30,524 --> 01:11:32,766 I usually do not approve of men, 903 01:11:32,818 --> 01:11:37,030 but that boy Christopher will make a first-rate husband. 904 01:11:38,032 --> 01:11:39,859 I hope I see him again. 905 01:11:39,909 --> 01:11:42,400 Please! No, wait! I mean you no harm! 906 01:11:42,453 --> 01:11:45,952 I just want to speak to your chief! 907 01:11:48,501 --> 01:11:51,751 - Oh, no, please! No! 908 01:11:52,880 --> 01:11:55,038 No! No! 909 01:12:06,686 --> 01:12:09,556 ...ye cannae argue wi' the man. 910 01:12:09,605 --> 01:12:11,930 - No, get off! 911 01:12:11,982 --> 01:12:13,975 Please! Leave me alone! 912 01:12:14,026 --> 01:12:16,861 - No! No! 913 01:12:16,904 --> 01:12:19,276 Noooo! 914 01:12:28,582 --> 01:12:29,614 Who's there? 915 01:12:29,667 --> 01:12:33,830 It is I, the chief of this clan. 916 01:12:33,879 --> 01:12:37,046 - Who are you? - My name is Chris. 917 01:12:37,091 --> 01:12:38,715 Chris, is it? 918 01:12:38,759 --> 01:12:41,167 Are you an assassin, Chris? 919 01:12:41,220 --> 01:12:43,628 No. I'm a soldier from England. 920 01:12:43,681 --> 01:12:47,299 Hmm, a soldier from England, is it? 921 01:12:47,351 --> 01:12:49,973 And what did they tell you in England? 922 01:12:50,021 --> 01:12:52,393 That we are complete savages? 923 01:12:52,440 --> 01:12:56,224 There are some that think that, but I have heard a different tale. 924 01:12:56,277 --> 01:13:00,820 The tale of a great Scottish hero, who defended Scot Land all on his own. 925 01:13:00,865 --> 01:13:03,616 The tale of Braveheart. 926 01:13:03,659 --> 01:13:07,491 Back then, the English king was evil, he threw people out of castle windows. 927 01:13:07,538 --> 01:13:10,574 - I see. - Everybody loved Braveheart. 928 01:13:10,624 --> 01:13:13,661 Even though there were rumours that he were actually an Australian. 929 01:13:13,711 --> 01:13:15,787 Ah, interesting. 930 01:13:15,838 --> 01:13:18,839 But in the end, he almost beat the English. 931 01:13:18,883 --> 01:13:20,840 Do you know this tale? 932 01:13:20,885 --> 01:13:24,834 Aye, laddie. I know this tale. 933 01:13:24,889 --> 01:13:27,973 I know this tale because... 934 01:13:28,017 --> 01:13:31,682 I am Braveheart! 935 01:13:32,980 --> 01:13:35,103 - You what? - And you... 936 01:13:35,149 --> 01:13:38,352 you, Chris, are a Scotsman! 937 01:13:38,402 --> 01:13:40,110 Er, no, I'm not. 938 01:13:40,154 --> 01:13:42,823 - You are. - No, really, I'm from Kent. 939 01:13:42,865 --> 01:13:46,234 Ha! Kent! Just look at those great 'ands. 940 01:13:46,285 --> 01:13:49,488 That's a mark o' a Highlander if ever I saw one. 941 01:13:49,538 --> 01:13:52,492 Braveheart, we need your help. 942 01:13:52,541 --> 01:13:55,910 We need your help and your lethal weapons. 943 01:13:55,961 --> 01:13:58,832 Would that be lethal weapon one, two, three, or four? 944 01:13:59,965 --> 01:14:02,124 Will you join us in the fight for freedom? 945 01:14:02,176 --> 01:14:06,388 Aye. But first there is something we must do. 946 01:14:25,741 --> 01:14:29,573 Now you're home, laddie! 947 01:14:29,620 --> 01:14:35,540 Freedo-o-o-om! 948 01:14:48,681 --> 01:14:50,887 They're up to something. 949 01:14:50,933 --> 01:14:53,804 They're definitely up to something. 950 01:14:59,817 --> 01:15:03,981 Bring me Churchill's head on a plate. 951 01:15:04,030 --> 01:15:06,318 Jawohl, Herr Himmler. 952 01:15:17,752 --> 01:15:19,625 What in the name of? 953 01:15:19,670 --> 01:15:22,920 It's like the whole of hell has awoken. 954 01:15:22,965 --> 01:15:24,922 Shit on a stick. 955 01:15:24,967 --> 01:15:27,043 Artillery - feuer! 956 01:15:30,139 --> 01:15:33,342 Incoming! 957 01:15:50,868 --> 01:15:54,202 - Let's go, girls! 958 01:15:54,246 --> 01:15:56,405 Stand by for full armour attack. 959 01:15:56,457 --> 01:15:58,450 They're approaching the east wall. 960 01:15:58,501 --> 01:16:00,244 Hold the line! 961 01:16:00,294 --> 01:16:04,541 It's a bloody pack of wild Bavarian banshee bitches! 962 01:16:16,936 --> 01:16:19,723 Jawohl! Aaaah! 963 01:16:19,772 --> 01:16:21,314 They've breached the gates. 964 01:16:21,357 --> 01:16:23,433 Deutschland! Deutschland! 965 01:16:35,287 --> 01:16:36,947 Schnell! Schnell! 966 01:16:38,708 --> 01:16:40,166 Raus! 967 01:16:40,209 --> 01:16:43,163 Die, you feather pickers! 968 01:16:43,212 --> 01:16:45,917 Ah! Take this! Take that! Ah! 969 01:16:45,965 --> 01:16:48,586 Das ist das Englischer Schwein! 970 01:16:50,594 --> 01:16:54,426 Watch the ladders! 971 01:17:00,187 --> 01:17:02,857 We're going to lose the wall, Tom. 972 01:17:02,898 --> 01:17:05,983 - Get ready to sound the retreat. - Yes, sir. 973 01:17:15,619 --> 01:17:17,992 Sound the general retreat. 974 01:17:18,414 --> 01:17:20,620 Sound the general retreat! 975 01:17:20,666 --> 01:17:22,789 I retreat for no man! 976 01:17:22,835 --> 01:17:26,204 Come on, Father, fall back! 977 01:17:26,255 --> 01:17:30,716 Retreat, girls! Retreat to the catapult! 978 01:17:30,760 --> 01:17:33,298 Fall back, men! Jaldi, jaldi! 979 01:17:39,268 --> 01:17:42,055 I need someone to jump the propeller! 980 01:17:42,104 --> 01:17:44,774 Give me some cover! 981 01:17:44,815 --> 01:17:46,974 Covering fire! 982 01:17:47,026 --> 01:17:49,315 Get some o' this, baby, yeah! 983 01:17:54,909 --> 01:17:56,617 - Take aim! 984 01:17:56,660 --> 01:17:58,737 Fire! 985 01:18:07,088 --> 01:18:09,246 Aargh! 986 01:18:09,298 --> 01:18:11,125 No! 987 01:18:14,220 --> 01:18:16,177 Oh, they've got Tom! 988 01:18:16,222 --> 01:18:17,846 Murderers! 989 01:18:17,890 --> 01:18:20,463 We're out of ammunition! This is it! 990 01:18:23,396 --> 01:18:26,729 Well, well, it looks like we have won. 991 01:18:35,324 --> 01:18:37,946 Looks like poor Chris did not make it. 992 01:18:37,993 --> 01:18:39,986 I think this is the end. 993 01:18:40,037 --> 01:18:42,991 I am now ready to meet my maker. 994 01:18:43,833 --> 01:18:46,158 We fought bravely. 995 01:18:46,210 --> 01:18:48,831 We fought like Englishmen. 996 01:18:52,133 --> 01:18:55,632 Well, come on, then, damn it. 997 01:18:55,678 --> 01:18:58,430 What are you waiting for? 998 01:19:03,060 --> 01:19:05,812 Oh, Chris, where are you? 999 01:19:08,357 --> 01:19:10,350 Chris! 1000 01:19:17,700 --> 01:19:19,111 Ha-haa! 1001 01:19:30,838 --> 01:19:32,712 Christopher. 1002 01:19:32,757 --> 01:19:34,630 You made it, lad. 1003 01:19:39,263 --> 01:19:42,264 - He's done it. 1004 01:19:42,308 --> 01:19:44,597 The boy's done it! 1005 01:19:44,643 --> 01:19:46,969 He's brought us back an army! 1006 01:19:50,691 --> 01:19:52,933 Och aye! Och aye! 1007 01:19:52,985 --> 01:19:55,144 So the stories were true 1008 01:19:55,196 --> 01:19:58,066 about men in skirts. 1009 01:20:00,159 --> 01:20:03,610 Och aye! Och aye! 1010 01:20:03,662 --> 01:20:07,197 Och aye! Och aye! 1011 01:20:07,249 --> 01:20:10,784 Och aye! Och aye! Och aye! 1012 01:20:10,836 --> 01:20:12,580 Och aye! 1013 01:20:12,630 --> 01:20:15,963 I always knew the bastard was one of them. 1014 01:20:16,008 --> 01:20:19,591 Och aye! Och aye! Och aye! Och aye! Och aye! 1015 01:20:19,637 --> 01:20:21,962 Forward! 1016 01:20:44,704 --> 01:20:45,902 Nein! 1017 01:20:51,669 --> 01:20:53,329 Butt licker! 1018 01:20:54,338 --> 01:20:56,378 Kiss the rock! 1019 01:21:00,553 --> 01:21:02,130 Kiss, kiss! 1020 01:21:09,937 --> 01:21:12,060 Nein, nein, nein! 1021 01:21:12,106 --> 01:21:14,514 - Nein! Nein! - Come 'ere! 1022 01:21:14,567 --> 01:21:16,974 - Nein! Nein! - Take that! 1023 01:21:17,028 --> 01:21:18,107 Oh, ja! 1024 01:21:18,154 --> 01:21:22,650 Oh, the Scots have ruined everything! 1025 01:21:32,835 --> 01:21:36,334 Air Force One, comin' through! 1026 01:21:38,549 --> 01:21:41,585 All right, ya Russian Nazi assholes, 1027 01:21:41,635 --> 01:21:43,758 it's just you and me now. 1028 01:21:43,804 --> 01:21:46,841 Hey, boys! I'm back! 1029 01:22:15,795 --> 01:22:19,211 There's someone alive in here! He's bleeding! 1030 01:22:24,929 --> 01:22:27,005 Help me! 1031 01:23:20,526 --> 01:23:23,480 The day is ours, gentlemen. 1032 01:23:23,529 --> 01:23:24,988 And ladies. 1033 01:23:25,031 --> 01:23:27,107 The day is ours. 1034 01:23:27,158 --> 01:23:31,736 Christopher, this is your victory. 1035 01:24:10,493 --> 01:24:12,948 Here we go! 1036 01:24:12,995 --> 01:24:14,988 Forwards to England! 1037 01:24:23,130 --> 01:24:25,538 Mein Fuhrer! It's a counterattack! 1038 01:24:25,591 --> 01:24:27,548 Ze Scots have breached the city walls! 1039 01:24:27,593 --> 01:24:29,586 We must get you out of London now! 1040 01:24:29,637 --> 01:24:33,765 Mein Gott! Get me out of zis godforsaken country. 1041 01:24:36,018 --> 01:24:37,762 Drive! Drive! 1042 01:24:37,812 --> 01:24:40,481 Into the tunnel, now! Now! 1043 01:24:53,661 --> 01:24:55,404 We did it, Daisy. 1044 01:24:55,454 --> 01:24:57,363 Yeah! We won the war! 1045 01:24:57,415 --> 01:25:00,700 - Aye, all right! - Hooray! 1046 01:25:02,753 --> 01:25:06,253 Those big hands are going to make me the happiest woman in England. 1047 01:25:06,298 --> 01:25:10,676 Ah! Looks like the hen has found her cock. 1048 01:25:10,720 --> 01:25:12,677 You stupid bitch! 1049 01:25:12,722 --> 01:25:16,007 Watch your backs, cavalry comin' through. 1050 01:25:16,058 --> 01:25:18,265 Fiske! You're alive! 1051 01:25:18,310 --> 01:25:20,552 Billy Fiske never dies. 1052 01:25:20,604 --> 01:25:22,396 Hey, where's that Frenchy gone? 1053 01:25:22,440 --> 01:25:25,191 - Alors! 1054 01:25:27,445 --> 01:25:29,983 I do love this car! 1055 01:25:30,031 --> 01:25:32,522 Son of a bitch. 1056 01:25:32,575 --> 01:25:35,362 Urgent letter for Mr Churchill coming through. 1057 01:25:35,411 --> 01:25:36,656 Aha! 1058 01:25:36,704 --> 01:25:39,242 Finally, me pension has arrived. 1059 01:25:39,290 --> 01:25:44,331 Mm, a nice peaceful retirement, hmm? 1060 01:25:44,378 --> 01:25:47,498 If they think they can get rid of me that easily, 1061 01:25:47,548 --> 01:25:49,624 they've got another thing coming! 1062 01:25:49,675 --> 01:25:52,842 Now England and her empire 1063 01:25:52,887 --> 01:25:55,591 shall last a thousand years! 1064 01:26:03,105 --> 01:26:04,897 Zen again, maybe not. 1065 01:26:04,940 --> 01:26:06,898 I'm gonna eat your face! 1066 01:26:06,942 --> 01:26:09,231 Ah, close enough for me. 1067 01:26:09,278 --> 01:26:12,232 I'm gonna put my big Scottish willy in ya! 1068 01:26:12,281 --> 01:26:15,365 Chris? What have you done? 1069 01:26:21,999 --> 01:26:25,285 - You forgot your bicycle! 1070 01:26:34,887 --> 01:26:38,636 Let us retake this English castle! 1071 01:26:44,897 --> 01:26:47,186 England is ours! 1072 01:27:00,996 --> 01:27:02,028 Bugger. 1073 01:27:02,081 --> 01:27:05,781 Long live the Scottish Empire!