1 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:20,000 2 00:00:01,560 --> 00:00:03,520 This is Dave. 3 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:06,160 He tells dirty jokes to make a living. 4 00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:09,919 That look is the most place from the hard work that happened. 5 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:13,479 This signifies a deep thought, 6 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:17,719 the fire of the alchemist that changes fear and tragedy 7 00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:20,879 become levity and livelihood. 8 00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:24,200 Dave calls it "trance". 9 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:44,800 Thank you! Thank you very much! 10 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:48,640 Thank you all. 11 00:01:49,320 --> 00:01:50,840 Oh wow. 12 00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:53,920 That's interesting, right? 13 00:01:56,560 --> 00:02:00,840 Thank you, friend. Have a seat, feel comfortable, relax. 14 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:08,760 I want to thank everyone in LA for a wonderful week 15 00:02:10,480 --> 00:02:11,880 It's been great here. 16 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:18,199 Do you know what? It's been ten years Since the last time I played in Los Angeles, 17 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:19,440 if you can imagine 18 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:24,480 I know! I know, I have gone for a very long time 19 00:02:25,400 --> 00:02:28,759 And without your knowledge, is ten difficult years. 20 00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:30,759 I will not take you through all the suffering that I have experienced, 21 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:31,880 but it's difficult 22 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:34,360 Some of them you might see. 23 00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:37,839 I don't know if you've seen TMZ big title: 24 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:41,160 "Drunk Dave Chappelle on stage in Detroit." 25 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:44,480 Well, if you see it, I'm not drunk. 26 00:02:45,080 --> 00:02:47,000 I have smoked some reefer... 27 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:49,680 with some rapper. 28 00:02:50,680 --> 00:02:53,999 Yes. I don't know if you know anything about hanging out with a rapper, 29 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:56,360 but their weeds are very strong, 30 00:02:56,920 --> 00:02:59,679 stronger than what I usually experience. 31 00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:02,319 The article continues to say that I was ridiculed offstage, 32 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:04,119 which is also wrong 33 00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:05,640 I am mocked 34 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:08,040 I'm not leaving. 35 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:12,800 It's a long bomb. 36 00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:17,959 That was a nightmare. Two gusts of weeds, that's all. 37 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:19,080 Two gusts. 38 00:03:19,920 --> 00:03:22,079 I never experienced that, where I took two puffs of weeds, 39 00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:24,359 I looked at the man beside me, I was like, "I'll bomb, nigga. 40 00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:25,480 I can feel it." 41 00:03:27,920 --> 00:03:29,239 And that person called my name. 42 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:32,479 "Dave Chappelle!" 43 00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:33,600 Niggas like... 44 00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:38,999 Usually, when you do comedy shows... 45 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,759 you don't know what it looks like here, 46 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:42,240 but the niggas only looks up to you like... 47 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:47,960 That's how the program starts. 48 00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:51,639 It doesn't take long for their faces to change like, "What the hell?" 49 00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:53,679 They began to search among themselves. 50 00:03:53,680 --> 00:03:56,280 So I know I'm not doing good. I don't remember what I said. 51 00:03:57,360 --> 00:03:59,879 It only takes one person to break the ice. 52 00:03:59,880 --> 00:04:02,320 That is a black woman with a Ford Motor shirt on. 53 00:04:03,320 --> 00:04:05,599 Stand up suddenly. "Fuck, Dave Chappelle!" 54 00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:07,000 I said, "Excuse me?" 55 00:04:08,840 --> 00:04:11,959 He said, "I work all week. For this nonsense, and this program sucks!" 56 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,959 And in strange racial harmony, 57 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,159 a conservative white man stands and supports him. 58 00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:19,000 "Yes!" 59 00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:23,399 The whole crowd united and started singing, 60 00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:26,999 "We want our money back! We want our money back!" 61 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,359 I said, "Oh, shit." I flinched from it. 62 00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:35,360 "Good people in Detroit, listen to me. Listen to me now. 63 00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:40,200 You will never be able to your fucking money back." 64 00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:43,800 Fuck it 65 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:49,920 I said, "I am like Evel Knievel. I was paid for the effort. 66 00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:53,280 I did not promise this nonsense would be good." 67 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:56,999 "Boo!" They say, "Fuck it!" 68 00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:00,319 This lasts a long time. And then, after the show, I feel very bad, 69 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:03,319 I take half of the money from the show... thousands of dollars... 70 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:05,959 I said, "I will give this to charity." Do you know what I did? 71 00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:09,519 I bought $ 25,000 of gum 72 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:12,399 and drove around Detroit and handed it to the homeless so they can chew it and still hungry. 73 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:15,040 I was very angry in Detroit that night. 74 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:22,040 Because I'm not just a bomb, 75 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,199 I have to go back to the same room the next night and do it again. 76 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:29,919 A annoying nightmare It will be like If you have sex with a woman 77 00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:33,919 and, for some reason... this will never happen... 78 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:35,999 but for some reason, He has a mouse trap in his vagina. 79 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:39,680 You are caught in a trap. 80 00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:42,760 81 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:45,920 And then you have to fuck her again tomorrow night. 82 00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:50,040 I will still do it, but I will be careful next time. 83 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:53,480 Old mousetrap-in-the-pussy tricks, eh? 84 00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:55,680 I'm so stupid. 85 00:06:01,120 --> 00:06:06,039 Yes. Yes, this is a difficult time. And I want to give up sometimes. 86 00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:08,999 I almost gave up, But then, right before I gave up, 87 00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:10,399 I decided not to do it. 88 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,759 But I called. They answer the phone. 89 00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:15,559 "Hello, Dancing with Stars." 90 00:06:15,560 --> 00:06:16,960 I said, "Not yet. Not yet." 91 00:06:18,240 --> 00:06:19,760 Yes. 92 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:22,400 93 00:06:23,360 --> 00:06:28,320 If you see me in that crap, it's over. Trust me. My spirit is broken If you see me waiting for them to judge... 94 00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:31,040 criticized on my cha-cha, fuck it 95 00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:40,640 I've been hanging out in... I haven't worked in LA, 96 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:45,079 But I'm out here and hanging out and bad luck. 97 00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,960 I was here a few weeks ago. I was almost arrested. 98 00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:51,560 I'm not bullshit. This happens to many black people. 99 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:55,039 What happens is... 100 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:56,440 I'm out of one from a Hollywood nightclub 101 00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:01,399 and my friend saw me I think I'm rocking or something. 102 00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:04,119 103 00:07:04,120 --> 00:07:05,559 So, he just went out of business. She's my best friend. 104 00:07:05,560 --> 00:07:08,119 She's like, "Hey, Dave, give me the key." 105 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:10,279 I'm like, "Okay, okay, just take the key." 106 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:13,239 And I arrived at the passenger side from my car, and he drove it. 107 00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:15,799 That's fine. Just talking, cutting it off. 108 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:18,479 And then, on the 10th, blue-and-white hits us. 109 00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:22,479 Now, I have to tell you, The friend who escorted me was black, 110 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:25,160 which really has nothing to do with the story 111 00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:29,680 other than telling you There is fear in the car. 112 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,240 Not my fear. I'm black, 113 00:07:35,920 --> 00:07:37,640 But I'm also Dave Chappelle. 114 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:43,400 So, I think, you know, Damn it might be okay. 115 00:07:48,280 --> 00:07:50,559 Traffic stops starting on the right foot 116 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:53,599 Police approach the driver's side. "Hi, what are you doing tonight?" 117 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:55,879 And he immediately recognized me. "Oh, Dave Chappelle." 118 00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:58,080 And I saw my friend like, "We're out of this nonsense." 119 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:05,839 And then he said, "You're writhing on a small road. Do you mind just stepping out of the car for a while?" 120 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:08,439 There is still no reason to be alert. I look in the rearview mirror. 121 00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:12,319 Arrest body language looks good 122 00:08:12,320 --> 00:08:14,600 123 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:16,640 Just talking. 124 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,479 So, I started making love to the radio. 125 00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:23,679 You know the traffic stop is going well if you are listening to the radio 126 00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:25,560 When there are other people outside the car. 127 00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:27,999 But then, when I looked back in the rearview mirror, 128 00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:30,480 something has gone terribly wrong The bastard returned there like... 129 00:08:34,240 --> 00:08:37,759 And the next thing I know, is that right stuffing him behind the car, 130 00:08:37,760 --> 00:08:40,879 and I think what people think in such situations: 131 00:08:40,880 --> 00:08:45,200 "My God. What will happen to me?" 132 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:53,959 And the police walk to the window. 133 00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:55,919 "Mr. Chappelle, we have to catch your friend 134 00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:58,479 He refused to take our breathalyzer test. " 135 00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:00,640 I said," That bastard. 136 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:04,400 Not obeying That's weird. 137 00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:07,079 So, officer, what will happen to me? " 138 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,719 " You're fine, we just need to ask you to get out of the car so we can confiscate vehicles, 139 00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:11,119 and we will arrange you to go home. " 140 00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:12,639 I said," Oh, well, no. I prefer you to give me the key. " 141 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:17,320 He said," Mr. Chappelle, your friend has told us 142 00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:21,159 he is your designated driver We cannot let you drive in this condition. " 143 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:22,399 144 00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:24,439 145 00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:26,440 I'm like, "No, okay, I'm good." 146 00:09:28,520 --> 00:09:32,400 Then suddenly, shit turned into Vegas. 147 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:34,480 She's like... 148 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:37,279 "I will let you blow it for that." 149 00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:38,760 I said, "Excuse me?" 150 00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:42,599 He said, "If you blow my breathalyzer..." 151 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:44,999 I said, "Oh, yeah, I thought . You tried to get your penis sucked. 152 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,239 What... 153 00:09:46,240 --> 00:09:47,440 Wow! 154 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:49,960 Wow!" 155 00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:58,919 "If you blow a breathalyzer and pass, I will give you the keys to the car." 156 00:09:58,920 --> 00:10:00,360 I said, "Uh... 157 00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:03,280 set them up, okay. Let's play." 158 00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:07,560 And I blew that thing. 159 00:10:09,240 --> 00:10:12,039 And it makes a scene. "Sounds!" I said, "Uh-oh." 160 00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:15,839 And he saw it. He said, "Oh well, Mr. Chappelle, 161 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:18,480 I think you're free to go." 162 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:21,200 I said, "Me?" 163 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:25,199 I don't know that doesn't take weeds 164 00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:28,880 I returned home on 10 30 miles per hour. 165 00:10:30,680 --> 00:10:32,280 Yes, everything works. 166 00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:35,440 Everything works. 167 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:40,080 I'm one of the lucky ones. No works well for everyone. 168 00:10:40,560 --> 00:10:43,959 I saw footage of the woman being beaten in LA traffic. 169 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,639 Do you see that crap in rush hour traffic? 170 00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:49,199 They hit the butt of a black woman. This woman doesn't even make mistakes. 171 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:52,759 This is chaotic. It's very chaotic, Don't even go to court. 172 00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:58,559 City of L.A. only gave the woman $ 1.5 million for her pain and suffering. 173 00:10:58,560 --> 00:11:00,199 That's not bad, 174 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:03,799 considering the amount is equal to money made by Marcos Maidana 175 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:06,400 to fight Floyd Mayweather the second time. 176 00:11:07,440 --> 00:11:11,400 And this woman is clearly not trained the day in her life 177 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:14,519 You can see it on the tape. He doesn't participate in fighting. 178 00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:17,520 His bodyguard is low. He took a lot of shots. 179 00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:30,519 Everyone is angry with the police now. I saw that... 180 00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:34,879 You saw that crap on Netflix, Made a murderer? 181 00:11:34,880 --> 00:11:36,960 Steven Avery's story. 182 00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:39,399 If you haven't seen it yet, check it out. 183 00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:43,239 Steven Avery is in more trouble than white people 184 00:11:43,240 --> 00:11:47,080 in the history of the United States has already been entered 185 00:11:48,520 --> 00:11:51,840 In the justice system designed for him to develop, 186 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,120 he failed miserably twice 187 00:11:57,600 --> 00:12:00,080 I can't even wrap my mind around it. 188 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,719 If Making a Killer about a black man, 189 00:12:02,720 --> 00:12:05,320 that shit will be called Duh! 190 00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:09,560 Of course everything will be wrong. 191 00:12:10,440 --> 00:12:15,359 It seems like he did it, alright. The bastard even has $ 200,000 192 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,679 for legal defense. 193 00:12:16,680 --> 00:12:20,800 That will make you go in Wisconsin. It's like OJ money. 194 00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:26,200 What he needs to go down which he doesn't have 195 00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:28,880 is a single black jury. 196 00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:31,759 Only that is needed. 197 00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:33,799 Because only black people in the United States 198 00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:38,400 can see 11 other dudes and be like, "I think the police are doing this nonsense." 199 00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:45,840 He's messed up in the game. 200 00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:49,000 That's how OJ went down. 201 00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:53,280 I have watched the new OJ program. I can't get enough of that crap. 202 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:57,280 Doesn't that bring back good memories? 203 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:06,559 But I forgot how to polarize The OJ case. 204 00:13:06,560 --> 00:13:10,759 And you know, I've met OJ Simpson on four different occasions in my life. 205 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:12,919 And before the end of the show, 206 00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:15,920 I will tell you about each from that opportunity 207 00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:22,519 The first time I met OJ Simpson, I was in Santa Monica. 208 00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:23,920 - Santa Monica! - yes! 209 00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:27,360 I can't believe that black man is like, "Santa Monica!" 210 00:13:28,480 --> 00:13:31,240 You are the last number I expected to say that 211 00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:35,200 Let me see your shoes. Do you have a few Vans? What did you get? 212 00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:40,800 "Santa Monica!" 213 00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:44,000 you? 214 00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:50,479 I was 18 years old at the time. I have done the show, 215 00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:53,559 and the guy from the club came and like, "Hey, OJ Simpson is here, 216 00:13:53,560 --> 00:13:54,839 and he said he wanted to meet you." 217 00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:58,040 I said, "What? Fuck it!" I ran down the stairs, 218 00:13:59,040 --> 00:14:01,279 and OJ is there. He is like, "Hey, young man how are you? 219 00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:04,439 Nice to meet you And you do a really good job, 220 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:06,639 and I hope good things happen for you in your life." 221 00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:08,880 I'm like, "Man, thank you, Mr. Juice." 222 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:14,359 Standing next to it, is... 223 00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:16,560 I don't know a good way to say this... 224 00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:19,520 his wife will soon be fired. 225 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:23,679 Ladies and gentlemen, man fuck up, 226 00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:25,759 or you will not succeed until the end of this event 227 00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:27,120 Only humans stumble. 228 00:14:28,560 --> 00:14:31,239 He died. We already know what happened. 229 00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:34,680 We don't know who did it, But we know what happened. 230 00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:44,439 I have to tell you, The woman is very nice to me. 231 00:14:44,440 --> 00:14:46,079 He really hugged me. 232 00:14:46,080 --> 00:14:48,519 He said, "I think you are adorable," and he hugged me 233 00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:52,759 He said, "Good luck," and he held me for a long time. 234 00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:56,400 And I whispered in his ear, "Bitch, Are you trying to get us both killed?" 235 00:15:01,120 --> 00:15:03,240 I'm just kidding. I didn't say that, but... 236 00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:06,920 That is the first time, in short. 237 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:15,639 It's good to see so much... There are so many different people here 238 00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:26,799 It seems you think Bernie Sanders will come out in this bastard 239 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,479 But... surprise! 240 00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:30,840 This is me. 241 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:40,079 Yes, you know, I'm happy, really, to see black people coming. 242 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:42,440 Many black people don't love with me like they used to. 243 00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:57,840 I mean, that would be my guess. I don't know what... 244 00:16:01,280 --> 00:16:03,999 Actually, my own action is making slices between me and the community I hold it so dear 245 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:06,840 A few weeks ago, I should be in Flint, Michigan, 246 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,639 for charity that should be to increase alertness 247 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:15,679 for terrible conditions from water in Flint. 248 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:17,679 I don't know if you know this, 249 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:19,039 but the water in Flint is fucking poisonous This really makes people sick. 250 00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:21,359 Hollywood people like, "So what? At least they have water." 251 00:16:21,360 --> 00:16:23,319 But this water... 252 00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:26,079 This water is chaotic. 253 00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:28,160 254 00:16:32,600 --> 00:16:34,159 255 00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:37,239 So, many black celebrities fly to Flint, 256 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:40,639 and they do extraordinary charity, 257 00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,880 and I am on the schedule to appear. 258 00:16:44,520 --> 00:16:45,840 Uh... 259 00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:53,279 So, the reason many people have never heard of this benefit... 260 00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:55,400 That is the same day as Oscar. 261 00:16:56,280 --> 00:17:00,879 Okay, I know. So, I was on my way to the airport to go to Flint, 262 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:02,519 and then Chris Rock calls me and like, 263 00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:05,839 "Hey, Dave, I got a ticket for you for Oscar Can you make it?" 264 00:17:05,840 --> 00:17:09,240 And I'm like, "Sure, yeah. I'm on my way to the airport right now." 265 00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:15,439 Come on, man. What will I do about the water? 266 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:19,320 Am I, shit superhero? I have to have fun. I have to live too! 267 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:21,960 I didn't screw that water! 268 00:17:24,440 --> 00:17:27,400 Stevie Wonder is there. They don't need me. 269 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,319 I'm sorry, everyone I've never been to an Oscar. 270 00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:32,920 You have seen a movie that I made. 271 00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:45,159 I am very happy. I know I will get into trouble, 272 00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:46,999 because when I was walking on the red carpet, 273 00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:50,679 black press chasing me. "Sorry, brother." 274 00:17:50,680 --> 00:17:52,439 When you hear someone calling you "brother" too much, 275 00:17:52,440 --> 00:17:53,759 something terrible will happen 276 00:17:53,760 --> 00:17:55,359 "Excuse me, brother?" 277 00:17:55,360 --> 00:17:58,679 And I looked back, and the bastard had a tuxedo with a kente cloth tie. 278 00:17:58,680 --> 00:17:59,800 I said, "Uh-oh." 279 00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:03,039 He said, "I just want to ask you a few questions." 280 00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:04,679 I said, "What other publications?" 281 00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:06,879 He said, "Me? I'm with The Daily Bongo." 282 00:18:06,880 --> 00:18:11,360 I said, "Daily Bongo? What is this? Who reads this?" 283 00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:17,679 He said, "Listen, brother, . I just want to ask a short question. You understand that this year, is a boycott for Oscars. 284 00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:21,679 285 00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:24,199 So, I just want to know what made you, from everyone, 286 00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:27,599 crossing the picket line mom and being here tonight. " 287 00:18:27,600 --> 00:18:29,520 I said," Boycott? 288 00:18:30,320 --> 00:18:33,560 Nigga, I haven't worked in ten years. 289 00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:36,799 What do you mean, boycott? I've been on strike. 290 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:39,079 You niggas don't stop working. 291 00:18:39,080 --> 00:18:42,880 I have to watch Key and Peele do my show every night So, damn Daily Bongo, " is what I said 292 00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:55,280 I went to Oscar and had fun. 293 00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:58,999 I went into that damn green room. It's full of so many stars, 294 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:01,799 295 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:03,319 I don't even believe what I saw. 296 00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:06,040 Hollywood seduces me again. 297 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:14,200 I sit back there. I smoke, drink with stars. 298 00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:19,319 And then two Hollywood film producers came in, right for me "Oh, God, Dave Chappelle," said one leader. 299 00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:21,959 He is obviously gay. 300 00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,760 Some people, you can know. 301 00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:26,920 Others look like money people. Maybe he is from Texas or bullshit. 302 00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:31,719 But the gay is definitely the leader because he did all the talking. 303 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:34,720 And then he hit me with: "So, David, um... 304 00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:38,000 305 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:42,560 Do you have a movie idea? What do you want to pursue? " 306 00:19:43,280 --> 00:19:45,440 Actually, I'm not. But if you know the game, 307 00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:48,479 You shouldn't tell a bastard You don't have an idea. I'm like," Yeah, man. I have many ideas. " 308 00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,759 And he calls my boss. " Really? What is it like? " 309 00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:53,719 " Huh? 310 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:56,039 Um... 311 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:58,040 um... " 312 00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:00,240 And then I started making nonsense I thought maybe he wanted to see it. 313 00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:02,519 I said," I have a superhero idea. " He said," Really? " 314 00:20:02,520 --> 00:20:07,320 I went "Yes, he... He is a gay superhero. " 315 00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:10,839 316 00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:14,199 317 00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:16,800 He is like, "Really?! 318 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,239 What is it called?" 319 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:23,920 "Hah? Oh, this is called... This is called Same Hero, New Boots. 320 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:29,800 This is about sous gay chef in San Francisco... 321 00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:33,839 that gets a little by radioactive mice on the shift 322 00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:35,240 when he throws out the garbage 323 00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:38,679 and is blessed with strength Out of his wildest dreams, 324 00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:41,839 gay supersonic type. 325 00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:45,679 And he starts saving everyone in San Francisco. 326 00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:47,959 But initially, he just save gay people. 327 00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:49,759 Then, he saved everyone, 328 00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:51,879 and the whole city fell in love with him. 329 00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:55,639 The only problem is, Nobody remembers it when he saved them. " 330 00:20:55,640 --> 00:20:59,439 " Well, I don't understand. Why don't they remember it? " 331 00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,440 I said," Because, stupid, he's gay. 332 00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,480 He keeps changing his clothes. 333 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:12,039 People come... "Thank you for saving me, sir. 334 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:13,239 What's your name? ' 335 00:21:13,240 --> 00:21:15,959 He's like,' Same Hero, New Boots! ' 336 00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:17,680 And the villain flew away. " 337 00:21:23,360 --> 00:21:25,960 She's like, "I like it very much." 338 00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:30,439 The Texans don't like that crap at all. He is upset. 339 00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:32,519 "That's impossible, a gay superhero." 340 00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:36,439 I said, "What? Well, I have someone else. I have a superhero that you love, 341 00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:38,119 Because he is stronger than Superman and he fights for truth, justice and the American way, like Superman, 342 00:21:38,120 --> 00:21:41,759 but more than Superman. 343 00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:43,119 He defeated Mexicans for no reason. " 344 00:21:43,120 --> 00:21:45,120 Texans like, "You get my attention." 345 00:21:50,120 --> 00:21:52,680 I am like, "Man, this bastard is so strong, 346 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,919 he can fly and do all this nonsense. 347 00:21:56,920 --> 00:21:58,999 Only a problem with this person whether he can't even activate his power 348 00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:02,759 unless he touches... 349 00:22:02,760 --> 00:22:04,279 350 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,400 unless he touches the woman's vagina. 351 00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:10,200 Soon, only a few pats. " 352 00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:21,759 He said," Okay, what's the problem with that? 353 00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:26,920 I said, "The problem, sir, is that our hero is not a handsome man. And he often lacks cash. So, whenever the problem breaks, he has to go around town and convince woman to let her pat their pussy. 354 00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:31,240 'Please, forget! The building is on fire. Can I pat the vagina? Immediately. People are dying!' 355 00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:37,319 But he can't say exactly why. 356 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:39,719 'Eww! Stay away! You are dirty! 357 00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:43,919 358 00:22:43,920 --> 00:22:45,199 359 00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:46,799 360 00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:48,519 361 00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:52,399 'Please, forget it! People are dying! Just a few pats! ' 362 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:55,280 'Eww! Dirty! Stay away! ' 363 00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:02,320 So, he raped her. 364 00:23:04,360 --> 00:23:09,160 I know I know. That is a dilemma for the audience. 365 00:23:10,120 --> 00:23:14,200 Because he raped, but he saved a lot of lives. 366 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:20,240 And he saved more than raping, and he only raped to save. 367 00:23:22,120 --> 00:23:24,080 But he is rape. " 368 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:29,519 I didn't realize it, but overall Green room looked at us. All celebrities were disgusted. 369 00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:31,119 " Ohh. " 370 00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:32,240 The person from Texas was like, " This is my card, call me Monday . " 371 00:23:33,040 --> 00:23:36,800 That works. 372 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:41,320 373 00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:46,720 The second time I met OJ Simpson. 374 00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:56,280 That's right after this century trial 375 00:23:56,600 --> 00:24:00,040 That's me, now a 23 year old young man. 376 00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:07,439 OJ Simpson is the most famous, or famous, face on planet earth. 377 00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:10,839 I was at a restaurant in Beverly Hills with my agent 378 00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:13,239 I'm not alone in a restaurant, but myself. 379 00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:16,759 I'm the only black person in the restaurant. 380 00:24:16,760 --> 00:24:19,600 And in the 90s, which felt very uncomfortable. 381 00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:22,840 Now I tend to enjoy it at this age. 382 00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:29,239 I was having dinner with my agent, 383 00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:30,919 celebrating the agreement that they said was profitable, 384 00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:33,440 But I then learn fucking sucked. 385 00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:38,439 And suddenly, a group of women passed by. 386 00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:40,400 Every race is in that group. 387 00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:45,119 Black, white, Asian, Latina, 388 00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:47,400 white, white... 389 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:49,680 and white again. 390 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:54,199 They are all beautiful. I see them passing by. 391 00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:56,639 Then I see my familiar face. 392 00:24:56,640 --> 00:25:00,079 Al Cowlings, man from the famous Bronco chase, 393 00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:03,599 walk with and hug one woman, and they walk towards the door. 394 00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:07,079 Don't believe what I see. And then, close behind, 395 00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:10,359 is OJ Simpson, has just been released from prison The restaurant fell. 396 00:25:10,360 --> 00:25:11,880 397 00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:16,119 I was surprised. I didn't mean to say it out loud, but it just came out. 398 00:25:16,120 --> 00:25:18,000 "OJ!" 399 00:25:19,760 --> 00:25:22,919 He stopped, turned to see who said it, 400 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:26,120 see my black face and assumed correctly it was me. 401 00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:33,399 I'm sitting in a corner of the booth. 402 00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:35,719 He bowed over all white people I was having dinner together 403 00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:36,839 and shake my hand. 404 00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:39,079 "How are you, young man?" 405 00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:41,919 He looks into my eyes, and I can see in his eyes 406 00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,400 that he doesn't remember ever meeting me first time. 407 00:25:46,120 --> 00:25:47,920 And then he walked away. 408 00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:50,319 And I look back at my agent, 409 00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:56,439 and everything is nothing short disgust on their faces And the one with courage to voice their disgust 410 00:25:56,440 --> 00:25:59,319 is a woman named Sharon who usually represents me 411 00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,800 "How can you do that?" he says. 412 00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:05,360 "How can you shake hands? with the killer? 413 00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:09,880 I said," Sharon, with all due respect, 414 00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:13,639 the killer ran more than 11,000 yards. 415 00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:16,680 And he was released. So, you know, damn it. 416 00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:25,760 Gloves aren't right. 417 00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:28,040 Gloves aren't right. 418 00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:31,439 Get rid of yourself. " 419 00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,240 420 00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:38,919 Some people can't do that. 421 00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:41,320 Some people can't handle themselves Gay people have difficulty doing that recently. 422 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,680 We start. This is deep water. 423 00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:49,120 No, recently I noticed. 424 00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:52,959 I saw it with the Manny Pacquiao controversy. 425 00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:56,840 Yes, that... Now, in the defense of the gay community, 426 00:26:57,520 --> 00:27:02,080 Manny Pacquiao says some nonsense about gay people, 427 00:27:02,720 --> 00:27:06,479 Very bad things that I won't repeat, 428 00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:08,599 But there are biblical verses and some analogies with animals. 429 00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:15,319 430 00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:18,880 That's not a good look. Nike immediately took his shoes. 431 00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:24,639 Which I think is rather rude. A little rough, do you know what I mean? 432 00:27:24,640 --> 00:27:27,479 Only because he's Asian. Do you know what I mean? 433 00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:32,359 How will you take the shoes? from an Asian man to calm a gay man? 434 00:27:32,360 --> 00:27:34,679 Do you know what I mean? Not? You don't know what I mean. 435 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:39,520 But Asians know what I mean. Not? There are no Asians in front? Not? 436 00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:44,039 No, this is what I meant. Listen, you are Asian... 437 00:27:44,040 --> 00:27:47,680 I say this without respect. We are all Americans, right? 438 00:27:48,360 --> 00:27:52,239 And we can agree that America _ has a large number of bodies throughout the world, 439 00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:53,959 but no more than Asia. 440 00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:56,799 Literally, if you look at history, just now, 441 00:27:56,800 --> 00:28:01,479 we have bombed that masculinity from all continents 442 00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:04,359 We dropped two atomic bombs in damn Japan, 443 00:28:04,360 --> 00:28:07,440 and they have been drawing Hello Kitty and bad luck ever since. 444 00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:12,640 There are lots of boys after our bombs 445 00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:16,759 And I know these things because of my Asian wife She's a Filipino. 446 00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:18,000 Okay okay So, that explains it. 447 00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:21,759 Now you know why you see me on all of the Philippine events. 448 00:28:21,760 --> 00:28:25,200 449 00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:29,440 I'm not picking up pussy. I dropped a few off. 450 00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:37,559 I took my wife to all that nonsense. 451 00:28:37,560 --> 00:28:40,079 I brought my wife to see Pacquiao against Mayweather 452 00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:43,079 We sit ringing, okay? That... 453 00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:46,560 Yes, it is a journey home in a quiet car, That's what it is. 454 00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:51,919 But if you know what happened in the Philippines, 455 00:28:51,920 --> 00:28:55,799 You know that they get a whole generation of children in the Philippines grow without their mother Yes. 456 00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:59,919 Many women in the Philippines go to the Arabian Peninsula, 457 00:28:59,920 --> 00:29:03,039 they come to the United States, they make all their money here, 458 00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:05,799 459 00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:07,599 they send all the money home, 460 00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:10,799 which is still one of the number one staples in the Philippine economy... 461 00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:14,039 money sent by expatriates back to the Philippines 462 00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:17,639 People, on the other hand, are allowed to raise children, 463 00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:20,679 twirling their thumbs, waiting for their wife's check 464 00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:24,039 These people have been harassed. 465 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:28,239 Then suddenly, a boxer rose from between them and restore their maturity with a fist. 466 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:33,520 This is not the person who should to ask, 467 00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:37,479 "What do you think of homosexuals?" 468 00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:39,280 She's not your hero. 469 00:29:41,120 --> 00:29:42,840 470 00:29:45,640 --> 00:29:48,679 Dirt. That's why I don't have a sneaker agreement, 471 00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:50,719 Because if you say something that people don't like, 472 00:29:50,720 --> 00:29:52,560 they will take off your shoes. 473 00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:57,200 If Martin Luther King has a sneaker agreement, We are still behind the bus. 474 00:29:57,800 --> 00:29:59,759 That's right. The Nike executive will appear... 475 00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:01,880 "Hi, Martin. Uh... 476 00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:07,239 We need you to reduce conversations _ civil rights and blacks become human beings. 477 00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,999 This disappoints our Southern distributors." 478 00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:13,800 "But I don't understand. I think that's why I have a sneaker agreement in the first place." 479 00:30:14,640 --> 00:30:16,560 "Not really. 480 00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:21,480 481 00:30:23,240 --> 00:30:24,760 482 00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:29,160 Really, this is walking shoes. And we like to line up, but... 483 00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:33,680 Trying to understand. " 484 00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:36,360 Fuck it bad luck. You know, I understand. I understand why gay people are angry, 485 00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:40,399 and I empathize. 486 00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:41,719 Do you know what? I just said this as a black man. I support your movement. But if you want to take a few suggestions from a Negro, one step yourself. These things take a long time. 487 00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:44,919 Just because they have passed the law does not mean they will like it. 488 00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:46,759 Brown v. Board of Education in 1955 489 00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:50,360 490 00:30:51,280 --> 00:30:53,040 491 00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:56,879 492 00:30:56,880 --> 00:31:00,159 493 00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,959 Someone called me a negro in traffic last Wednesday. 494 00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:05,200 It takes a while. 495 00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:14,759 My wife's friend, Stewart, said that to me. My wife has many gay friends. 496 00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:16,720 Stewart is their leader. 497 00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:23,040 He has many gay friends. And I don't like them. 498 00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:29,319 Not because they are gay. 499 00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:31,159 I only judge them on the benefits of their character. 500 00:31:31,160 --> 00:31:34,239 They are just not good dudes. They are rude housemaids. 501 00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:37,399 They sit on my couch, giggle with my wife, 502 00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:40,560 eat my mother's macaroni. 503 00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:43,839 Then I go in, and they act like a party above. 504 00:31:43,840 --> 00:31:45,159 "Hey, Stewart, what happened?" 505 00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:47,600 This person talks to me on the road A cat will talk if a cat can talk. 506 00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:50,760 "Hi, David." 507 00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:57,520 "Stewart, is that all beef, man? What happened..." 508 00:31:58,600 --> 00:32:00,759 He always wants to have a kind of gay political argument. 509 00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,639 The last is about a petition in federal court 510 00:32:04,640 --> 00:32:07,159 to take the words "husband and wife" out law. 511 00:32:07,160 --> 00:32:09,359 I said, "Why do you want those words? out of law?" 512 00:32:09,360 --> 00:32:12,279 He said, "Because it discriminates against against same-sex couples." 513 00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:14,639 I'm like, "Niggas, please, save me semantics 514 00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:17,559 Believe me Take your chips and get out of the casino. You will be nonsense! yourself, 515 00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:19,040 and one of you is a gayer, is his wife. " 516 00:32:20,000 --> 00:32:23,079 No no. Stewart doesn't like it. 517 00:32:23,080 --> 00:32:26,240 Stewart educates me about this movement. I don't even know anything about it. 518 00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:34,440 He told me it was called "LBGTQ!" 519 00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:38,799 I'm like, "What is this 'Q'?" 520 00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:44,880 Does that make sense? "Q"? 521 00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:49,439 It turns out "Q" like vowels. 522 00:32:49,440 --> 00:32:51,479 523 00:32:51,480 --> 00:32:53,599 524 00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:56,760 That nonsense is sometimes "Y." 525 00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:00,679 This is for gay dudes. It doesn't really know they're gay. 526 00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:02,879 Like a homosexual who likes, "What? I'm not gay, nigga. I only suck on this penis to pass the time. 527 00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:05,520 I'm not 'G.' I am 'Q.' Ugh. " 528 00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:09,520 I think... Okay, once again, from all the letters, 529 00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:25,359 "T" has the toughest road ahead. 530 00:33:25,360 --> 00:33:28,239 Actually, I think "T" must stand for "A difficult road ahead." 531 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:31,840 They have the longest mental chasm bridging. 532 00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:37,559 That's all I say. 533 00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:38,839 Because every time I see it from them Ts on the road, 534 00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:41,079 535 00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:44,120 I don't mind them, But I will be like, "Man, I miss Bruce." 536 00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:49,760 I'm sorry, guys 537 00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:53,640 I am 42. I remember Bruce Jenner. 538 00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:56,879 Before the Kardashians, before all that, 539 00:33:56,880 --> 00:34:00,120 This bastard is a white American superhero. 540 00:34:00,960 --> 00:34:04,280 That's amazing. He defeated Africans in the lane and field 541 00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:07,760 We have never seen anything like this. 542 00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:10,999 He was in a cereal box I grew up. 543 00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:14,960 Do you know how much cereal I eat? Nigga, I don't know he will do that. 544 00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:24,039 I know before you know. I heard things on the road in Hollywood. 545 00:34:24,040 --> 00:34:25,919 You just came out, saw people. 546 00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:28,920 "Hey, what's up, Kanye? Why is the face long?" 547 00:34:32,480 --> 00:34:33,840 "Nigga, you will see. I have two mother-in-law now." 548 00:34:34,960 --> 00:34:37,160 And when I hear he will do it, I'm afraid. 549 00:34:39,480 --> 00:34:42,880 I don't think the public is ready. I don't think the media is ready. 550 00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:46,559 And do you know what? I am wrong. 551 00:34:46,560 --> 00:34:48,759 It's not just the public to hug him, But the media is good. 552 00:34:48,760 --> 00:34:51,599 I've never seen anything like this. 553 00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:53,239 "Welcome to the world, Caitlyn. So long, Bruce. 554 00:34:53,240 --> 00:34:56,640 Hello, Caitlyn." 555 00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:58,599 I'm surprised! Did this happen? 556 00:34:58,600 --> 00:35:01,759 557 00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:04,239 Wait a minute. Is this time in American history where an American can make a decision for themselves, 558 00:35:04,240 --> 00:35:06,799 and even though other Americans Don't understand it, they will support it and let this person live happily? 559 00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:09,599 Is this what happened? If yes, then it's good for America. 560 00:35:09,600 --> 00:35:11,479 That's Dave Chappelle, an American. 561 00:35:11,480 --> 00:35:15,039 Although, Dave Chappelle, is black American, 562 00:35:15,040 --> 00:35:18,040 he's a little jealous I'm like, "How are you? are transgender people? defeating black people in the Olympic Games discrimination?" 563 00:35:22,480 --> 00:35:24,880 564 00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:28,160 565 00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:31,479 566 00:35:31,480 --> 00:35:34,440 567 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:39,799 If the police shoot half of it transgender like they did last year's niggas, 568 00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:41,640 There will be a pesky war in LA. 569 00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:45,759 I know black dudes in Brooklyn... hard street bastards... 570 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:47,640 Only those who wear high heels feel safe. 571 00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:03,080 Transgender is a gangster. 572 00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:06,720 I used to do business with a transgender in Hollywood. 573 00:36:07,720 --> 00:36:10,519 Man, everyone must be afraid of him in the meeting room. 574 00:36:10,520 --> 00:36:13,680 He will go in there, the newly printed woman, high heels, wallet 575 00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:18,319 Will not say anything to us, just walk around the conference table, 576 00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:19,600 looks bad and bad. 577 00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:31,559 Then he will walk to the head from the conference table, look at us all, 578 00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:34,720 Grab his wallet, pull his old dick and throw it on the table. 579 00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:40,639 "Let's talk business, gentlemen." 580 00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:42,720 "Aaah!" 581 00:36:48,040 --> 00:36:50,000 Damn is scary as a fuck. 582 00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:53,719 If your best friend tells you about it, you will be horrified. 583 00:36:53,720 --> 00:36:55,559 "Yo, nigga, let's go to the hospital 584 00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:57,959 and cut our penis and make the pussies out of them dirt." 585 00:36:57,960 --> 00:36:59,400 "What ?! 586 00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:03,640 Can't we get a matching jacket or a tattoo or something? 587 00:37:05,720 --> 00:37:08,399 Are you sure what you want to do? " " There are only ways to find out, no. 588 00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:11,960 Wu-Tang! Pow! Pow! 589 00:37:15,240 --> 00:37:18,240 Let's go to the club and the niggas trick to fucking us. Yes. " 590 00:37:28,920 --> 00:37:30,880 The third time I met OJ Simpson... 591 00:37:38,960 --> 00:37:42,199 The third time I met OJ Simpson, I did my best in life. I just finished the second season from Chappelle's Show. 592 00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:44,920 Man, it's a good day. I'm playing a comedy club in Miami, Repair 593 00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:50,880 I don't know if you've done it, but if it's already, 594 00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:54,679 You will know the green room door right on on stage 595 00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:56,119 596 00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:59,039 597 00:37:59,040 --> 00:38:00,599 Can you imagine something like that? 598 00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:02,239 If I exit the door from the green room, 599 00:38:02,240 --> 00:38:04,639 bam, I'm here, directly from the locker room 600 00:38:04,640 --> 00:38:08,319 And I do that. I walked out, and the whole crowd was like, "Hurray!" 601 00:38:08,320 --> 00:38:12,639 And I see... Ma'am, as close as you are to me... 602 00:38:12,640 --> 00:38:15,600 I saw it when I left: Juice. 603 00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:20,239 And I saw a confession in his eyes, 604 00:38:20,240 --> 00:38:23,279 and that makes me proud that he knows who I really am. 605 00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:26,559 I don't acknowledge his presence because it is a white audience, 606 00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:28,360 and I don't want to start panicking. 607 00:38:33,240 --> 00:38:35,039 But I did my show. The show went great. 608 00:38:35,040 --> 00:38:37,399 I said, "Good evening, everyone." They all said, "Yay!" 609 00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:38,679 And I don't say anything to OJ, 610 00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:40,760 But I only gave him a sign To tell him, I knew he was there. 611 00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:46,399 And I go into the green room, 612 00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:49,120 and OJ is already there! 613 00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:53,599 I like, "How is this possible?" 614 00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:54,760 I'm scared. 615 00:38:55,880 --> 00:38:58,799 And then my friends come in, and we all start talking. 616 00:38:58,800 --> 00:38:59,879 We sit on the sofa. 617 00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:02,279 And I just said what I saw with my own eyes 618 00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:04,279 You can trust me or not trust me. 619 00:39:04,280 --> 00:39:09,200 But in my experience, OJ Simpson... was one of the greatest men I've ever met. 620 00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:13,319 She's good at me. He is good for my friends. 621 00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:17,080 Conversations filled with warmth and flexibility, humor and wisdom. 622 00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:21,239 We talked for 90 minutes, Then suddenly, Juice said, 623 00:39:21,240 --> 00:39:24,919 "What do you know? I have to go. But it's nice to meet you again, 624 00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:27,199 and I'm glad everything works well." 625 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:28,559 I said, "Thank you, Juice." 626 00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:30,719 And my friend said, "Yeah, goodbye, Mr. Juice." 627 00:39:30,720 --> 00:39:32,080 They are new to the game. 628 00:39:35,400 --> 00:39:39,839 He said, "No. Thank you... for your hospitality Good evening friends." 629 00:39:39,840 --> 00:39:43,159 And we said, "Good evening." And he just walked out of the room. 630 00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:45,239 And once the door is closed, we all look at each other like, 631 00:39:45,240 --> 00:39:47,200 "The Nigga does that crap. 632 00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:49,720 Do you feel that? 633 00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:53,280 I can feel like... 634 00:39:55,400 --> 00:39:57,160 murder in that room." 635 00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:02,399 Well, you young head skipped that crap. 636 00:40:02,400 --> 00:40:03,879 You're too young You don't remember that 637 00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:06,159 - How old are you, young, man? You. - Twenty-four. 638 00:40:06,160 --> 00:40:08,599 Twenty-four? You don't know anything 639 00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:10,120 You don't know anything 640 00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,200 You have to be Google pesky that I live. 641 00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:16,559 Look, this is the reason I locked the bastard's cellphone. 642 00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:18,959 Seriously. Because of young people, 643 00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:21,439 you need to take a break from it... 644 00:40:21,440 --> 00:40:23,599 We all need to take a break from that technology, 645 00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:24,800 only for a moment. 646 00:40:30,200 --> 00:40:33,920 You know, I'm from a different time, young man. It is dark for you. 647 00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:38,359 I was from the time I wasn't even used to find out who was on the phone 648 00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:39,880 until I answer nonsense 649 00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:49,639 Like, when an ordinary tragedy strikes. I remember I was 12 years old, 650 00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:53,399 and the teacher swings the television into the class 651 00:40:53,400 --> 00:40:54,680 You remember today 652 00:40:56,960 --> 00:41:00,200 And he turned it on to one of three channels 653 00:41:01,640 --> 00:41:05,159 And he said, "Class, the shuttle took off, 654 00:41:05,160 --> 00:41:07,359 and we will all watch it take off." 655 00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:10,960 Man, that shit would be good for like, three to five minutes. 656 00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:15,880 That's right. You remember. It explodes! 657 00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:20,639 Right on television. Everybody on the boat dies. 658 00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:22,360 Immediately suspected of being killed. 659 00:41:23,240 --> 00:41:25,880 That's very bad, the teacher saw at all children and like... 660 00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:30,040 "You can go home." 661 00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,679 That is a bad national tragedy. 662 00:41:36,680 --> 00:41:40,360 This is the American Cold War. The Russians laugh at us. 663 00:41:40,920 --> 00:41:44,799 I mean, for men your age won't even know the pain, 664 00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:46,279 because in your generation, 665 00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:49,439 It's like an exploding spaceship every bad day. 666 00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:54,359 How can you care about anything? When do you know all the damn things? 667 00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:57,759 I get more than one police shot, and then one more happens, 668 00:41:57,760 --> 00:41:59,999 and then one more happens, and one more happens. 669 00:42:00,000 --> 00:42:02,439 I cried about Paris, and then Brussels happened. 670 00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:06,199 I can't trace all this nonsense. So you just give fuck up. 671 00:42:06,200 --> 00:42:09,479 That's the characteristic of your generation, and it's messed up, 672 00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:11,439 because your generation lives 673 00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:13,719 at the most difficult time in human history This is the spin era. 674 00:42:13,720 --> 00:42:17,639 Age where no one knows what they even see. 675 00:42:17,640 --> 00:42:22,319 Did you know that Planned Parenthood? for abortion? 676 00:42:22,320 --> 00:42:25,319 This is for people It doesn't plan everything at all. 677 00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:28,480 That's right. So, men of your age don't really know how they feel. 678 00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:38,799 Are you pro-choice? Are you anti-consequences? 679 00:42:38,800 --> 00:42:41,959 What does all that mean? 680 00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:43,480 It's easier not to take care of you. 681 00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:49,719 But for us, we are trained to care. 682 00:42:49,720 --> 00:42:53,240 683 00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:56,399 We were raised like that. 684 00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:59,519 I used to watch a fucking cartoon when I was growing up 685 00:42:59,520 --> 00:43:01,240 called Care Bears. 686 00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:09,519 It's about the damn group from the teddy bear people They are like teddy bears, but they are like people, 687 00:43:09,520 --> 00:43:12,039 and they are all different colors, 688 00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:14,559 and they're all fucking just walking around, caring. 689 00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:18,159 They care about each other and other things. 690 00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:22,120 They all have different designs on their stomachs, 691 00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:26,399 and the design tells you something about what they might be like inside. 692 00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:30,800 A group of beings is very, very loving. 693 00:43:33,240 --> 00:43:36,360 694 00:43:37,200 --> 00:43:40,359 And if the dirt is really bad, Just like the teddy bear, 695 00:43:40,360 --> 00:43:43,560 they don't get a meaningful face. They are determined. Hmm! 696 00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:46,799 And the leader will say, "Come on, friends. It's time for Bear Stare Care!" 697 00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:51,839 Remember that nonsense? 698 00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:53,320 And those little teddy bears will lock arms... 699 00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:59,160 and staring at the problem... 700 00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:02,839 and I'm not even nonsense... 701 00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:05,399 the real love will be shot out from their chest... 702 00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:09,160 and it will eliminate anything it's messed up And when we grow up, we want to be like that bear. 703 00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:15,520 And then we are heartbroken, 704 00:44:16,720 --> 00:44:20,040 705 00:44:21,040 --> 00:44:22,679 706 00:44:22,680 --> 00:44:26,239 because we found Life will not let us do that 707 00:44:26,240 --> 00:44:30,800 and it's impossible to shoot love from your chest However, I have shot love to someone's chest before 708 00:44:31,600 --> 00:44:36,080 I always do it. This is the next best thing. 709 00:44:40,880 --> 00:44:44,760 You kids don't know. 710 00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:54,440 Your generation has just been determined angry, angry 711 00:44:55,640 --> 00:45:01,520 Everyone is angry. 712 00:45:02,160 --> 00:45:03,720 Back when we were growing up, Only black people were angry. 713 00:45:04,280 --> 00:45:06,519 Now everyone just tries to enter the action. 714 00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:09,640 I try to think for myself, "When is everyone angry?" 715 00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:13,839 And then I realized this happened before we were born. 716 00:45:13,840 --> 00:45:16,599 717 00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:18,440 This is a long way to go, but... 718 00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:22,639 it might start in the Second World War. 719 00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:24,079 Think about that. 720 00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:26,839 All of these black men, millions of black men, 721 00:45:26,840 --> 00:45:29,399 leave the United States for the first time, 722 00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:32,239 going to Europe with the US Armed Forces 723 00:45:32,240 --> 00:45:36,319 and fight the Nazis and make more money against the Nazis than they ever dreamed they would succeed in the United States. 724 00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:38,719 And many of them, while they are in Europe... 725 00:45:38,720 --> 00:45:41,119 just to be real, not to be rude... 726 00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:44,679 727 00:45:44,680 --> 00:45:48,920 Many of them might get their penis sucked by white women. 728 00:45:49,760 --> 00:45:52,399 I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen. This is World War II Europe, 729 00:45:52,400 --> 00:45:54,159 and this is a difficult time, 730 00:45:54,160 --> 00:45:57,159 and penis sucked for shoelaces and brown 731 00:45:57,160 --> 00:45:58,640 and things that are very reckless. 732 00:46:02,120 --> 00:46:05,119 And it's very difficult to go back to America and sit behind the bus 733 00:46:05,120 --> 00:46:06,679 after you are in the South of France, 734 00:46:06,680 --> 00:46:09,760 get your penis sucking on the Crunch bar or crazy crap like that. 735 00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:15,480 It's a life-changing experience. 736 00:46:18,720 --> 00:46:23,279 And while it happens in Europe, Here, in America, for the first time, 737 00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:27,799 women enter the workforce en masse, by millions. 738 00:46:27,800 --> 00:46:30,759 All men have left. Someone has to run the factory. 739 00:46:30,760 --> 00:46:33,839 The women do it. Right. 740 00:46:33,840 --> 00:46:36,159 This is the first generation of American women have independent income, 741 00:46:36,160 --> 00:46:39,079 and when people return, women are not the same. 742 00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:41,919 American women have grown. 743 00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:43,399 They say the phrase that no woman on Earth has ever spoken before, 744 00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:47,239 things like, "No" and "Shut up" and "I don't feel like that." 745 00:46:47,240 --> 00:46:51,840 And then behind that screen, 746 00:46:58,520 --> 00:47:00,840 there are few government agencies that are known 747 00:47:01,400 --> 00:47:03,599 748 00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:06,959 who began testing mind control drugs in the American public. 749 00:47:06,960 --> 00:47:09,919 They are messed up. They tested it for 12 years. 750 00:47:09,920 --> 00:47:12,759 They don't realize this drug is not controlling the mind. 751 00:47:12,760 --> 00:47:14,439 They are developing their minds. 752 00:47:14,440 --> 00:47:17,920 That is LSD and mescaline and such nonsense 753 00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:21,239 And for the first time, there is a new school of thought 754 00:47:21,240 --> 00:47:22,439 which is chemically induced 755 00:47:22,440 --> 00:47:25,839 which makes people ask the community where they live 756 00:47:25,840 --> 00:47:28,999 In 1960, President of the United States 757 00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:31,199 only 42 years old. 758 00:47:31,200 --> 00:47:32,479 Can you imagine 759 00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:34,280 DMX is older than that. 760 00:47:38,640 --> 00:47:41,159 And he will deliver a new era of peace. 761 00:47:41,160 --> 00:47:44,759 He will avoid the Cold War. He will end segregation. 762 00:47:44,760 --> 00:47:48,959 And they blew the damn brain in front of everyone in Dallas. 763 00:47:48,960 --> 00:47:51,439 This country has never been the same. 764 00:47:51,440 --> 00:47:54,759 There were seven other big murders in the 60s. 765 00:47:54,760 --> 00:47:56,839 Whoever stands up and says anything 766 00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,799 shot down on the street like a fucking dog 767 00:47:59,800 --> 00:48:04,239 Kennedy, Kennedy, King, X, Evers, continuously. 768 00:48:04,240 --> 00:48:05,879 You don't even have to be famous. 769 00:48:05,880 --> 00:48:07,879 You can become a student at Kent State, 770 00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:10,079 or in Mississippi, protested the Vietnam War, 771 00:48:10,080 --> 00:48:11,800 and they also shot them. 772 00:48:14,440 --> 00:48:16,959 The 70s were a wild era. 773 00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:19,760 And while all of this happened... 774 00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:23,880 Bill Cosby raped 54 people. 775 00:48:26,880 --> 00:48:30,040 Damn it. That's a lot of rape, man. 776 00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:33,280 This person installed real numbers. 777 00:48:34,080 --> 00:48:36,080 She's like Steph Curry rape. 778 00:48:39,720 --> 00:48:42,480 Man, that's a lot of rape. Fifty-four? 779 00:48:43,720 --> 00:48:45,840 If he raped 30 fewer people... 780 00:48:47,160 --> 00:48:49,640 That's still two dozen rape! 781 00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:57,520 Don't forget, each of these rape has eight hours of sleep in it. 782 00:49:00,440 --> 00:49:04,240 Women and men, That's more than 400 hours of rape. 783 00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:08,280 It only takes 65 hours to get a pilot license 784 00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:16,080 If rape is an airplane, this number is Top Gun for sure. 785 00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:24,000 Yes, that is difficult. 786 00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:29,080 And I was on stage recently. I am in Syracuse, New York. 787 00:49:30,160 --> 00:49:33,520 Yes. Alright, for Syracuse. But the program didn't work so well... 788 00:49:34,560 --> 00:49:36,799 all because I'm talking about Bill Cosby a little. 789 00:49:36,800 --> 00:49:40,720 Not a little. I will be honest I talk about him for like, 25 minutes. 790 00:49:43,160 --> 00:49:45,239 And a woman stands In the back of the room, 791 00:49:45,240 --> 00:49:48,759 and he shouted, "You damn jerk 792 00:49:48,760 --> 00:49:51,080 to say these things!" 793 00:49:51,760 --> 00:49:52,880 "I know." 794 00:49:54,560 --> 00:49:58,799 Immediately, I feel bad. Not bad with what I say. 795 00:49:58,800 --> 00:50:02,040 I just feel bad like, "Oh, that's too bad . He doesn't like the show." 796 00:50:03,960 --> 00:50:07,600 I didn't realize it at first, but he didn't just say that, 797 00:50:08,240 --> 00:50:10,439 He rushes to the stage. 798 00:50:10,440 --> 00:50:13,199 When I see it, I only see this shadow figure 799 00:50:13,200 --> 00:50:17,079 damn up the hall toward me in full fight mode. 800 00:50:17,080 --> 00:50:19,840 I'm horrified. I said, "Oh, my God! 801 00:50:21,520 --> 00:50:23,560 I will kick this bitch." 802 00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:34,959 Luckily for me, I don't need to do it. Security overcomes it. 803 00:50:34,960 --> 00:50:37,280 But it's really damn bad scene. 804 00:50:37,840 --> 00:50:41,080 A fight ensued. Then, 805 00:50:41,840 --> 00:50:44,359 Finally, he screamed at me, 806 00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:45,919 "Women suffer!" 807 00:50:45,920 --> 00:50:47,160 I said, "I know." 808 00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:51,440 And, woman, I want you to know... I know. 809 00:50:52,680 --> 00:50:55,719 I want you to know Seriously, There are lots of men in this room 810 00:50:55,720 --> 00:50:58,359 who identify themselves as feminists. 811 00:50:58,360 --> 00:51:00,119 I will include myself in that matter. 812 00:51:00,120 --> 00:51:04,079 Never forget, we all have mothers and daughters and sisters and wives, 813 00:51:04,080 --> 00:51:07,439 and we want to see All these women do it well 814 00:51:07,440 --> 00:51:10,079 and not held by their sex. 815 00:51:10,080 --> 00:51:11,919 There are many men like that in this room 816 00:51:11,920 --> 00:51:13,319 There are many men like that In the world. 817 00:51:13,320 --> 00:51:17,200 Or as we know on the streets, donkey niggas. 818 00:51:24,360 --> 00:51:26,599 But when this woman is struggling and yells at me, 819 00:51:26,600 --> 00:51:29,719 I'm starting to get offended. And I will be honest, the race is involved. 820 00:51:29,720 --> 00:51:31,319 She is a young white woman. 821 00:51:31,320 --> 00:51:34,119 Good intentions, but don't think about it all the way through. 822 00:51:34,120 --> 00:51:39,720 "Bitch, how are you going to shout? to black people about discrimination?" 823 00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:43,639 He doesn't understand. He keeps walking. "Women suffer!" 824 00:51:43,640 --> 00:51:44,719 "I know." 825 00:51:44,720 --> 00:51:47,039 "Women suffer!" "The same team." 826 00:51:47,040 --> 00:51:49,760 "Women suffer!" "I know." 827 00:51:50,280 --> 00:51:52,959 And this is when he goes too far: "We suffer like you." 828 00:51:52,960 --> 00:51:54,520 "Slow roll you, bitch. You suffer, yes, but not like me. Unlike us." 829 00:51:58,960 --> 00:52:02,919 He said, "Suffering is suffering. What's the difference?" 830 00:52:02,920 --> 00:52:05,599 I said, "Come on, white woman, You know what that is. 831 00:52:05,600 --> 00:52:07,680 You are in theft. You just don't like your piece." 832 00:52:08,520 --> 00:52:11,360 You suffer, I suffer. 833 00:52:14,240 --> 00:52:16,440 You suffer, I suffer. That's how it works. 834 00:52:16,960 --> 00:52:20,400 835 00:52:21,240 --> 00:52:23,319 Can't make a comparative landing. 836 00:52:23,320 --> 00:52:26,599 If you are hungry, and your friend says, "You know, people are starving in Africa," 837 00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:28,880 "So, I'm still going to have lunch." 838 00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:37,799 Black people know about comparative suffering, 839 00:52:37,800 --> 00:52:39,719 and you know it This is a fucking dead end game. 840 00:52:39,720 --> 00:52:42,119 Blacks and Jews do that to each other all the time. 841 00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:44,800 You've played Who Has More with Jews 842 00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:49,480 It's a difficult match. 843 00:52:51,040 --> 00:52:52,799 Whenever you think you have Jews on a rope, 844 00:52:52,800 --> 00:52:54,879 the bastard will be like, "Well, don't forget Egypt." 845 00:52:54,880 --> 00:52:59,880 "Egypt?! Damn, no, I don't know. We returned to Egypt." 846 00:53:05,640 --> 00:53:07,519 What's wrong with him? What is he thinking? 847 00:53:07,520 --> 00:53:11,639 Does he think that I don't know is rape wrong? 848 00:53:11,640 --> 00:53:13,719 Does he think that is possible? I have no empathy 849 00:53:13,720 --> 00:53:16,319 for Bill Cosby's alleged victim? 850 00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:19,239 And I will be negligent if I don't remind you 851 00:53:19,240 --> 00:53:22,239 Technically all of this is still a charge Although, I admit it looks really bad. 852 00:53:22,240 --> 00:53:25,200 Maybe if he saw it correctly, 853 00:53:30,920 --> 00:53:33,759 he will have empathy for me, the man he attacked, 854 00:53:33,760 --> 00:53:37,280 a 42-year-old black comedian. 855 00:53:38,040 --> 00:53:40,039 856 00:53:40,040 --> 00:53:42,960 Obviously, Bill Cosby is a hero to me. 857 00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:45,679 And he doesn't know how it feels 858 00:53:45,680 --> 00:53:49,519 to think that your hero might have done something very cruel, 859 00:53:49,520 --> 00:53:51,359 God, you can't imagine it. 860 00:53:51,360 --> 00:53:55,600 It's as if you've heard it that chocolate ice cream itself... 861 00:53:56,880 --> 00:53:59,160 has raped 54 people. 862 00:54:04,120 --> 00:54:08,520 You will say to yourself, "Oh, man, but I like chocolate ice cream. 863 00:54:09,120 --> 00:54:11,040 I don't want rape to happen." 864 00:54:15,320 --> 00:54:18,159 Don't want to believe it. Initially, I did not believe. 865 00:54:18,160 --> 00:54:23,280 I said, "These people are obviously trying to destroy Dr. Cosby's rich heritage." 866 00:54:23,920 --> 00:54:28,080 Even 34 accusations into it, I'm still like, "Man... 867 00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:32,600 he might just rape ten or 11 these people." 868 00:54:36,760 --> 00:54:40,199 I know I know. But this is very difficult. You are still young 869 00:54:40,200 --> 00:54:44,279 Imagine if you knew 40 years from now that Kevin Hart raped 54 people. 870 00:54:44,280 --> 00:54:46,119 You will be like, "Oh, my God." 871 00:54:46,120 --> 00:54:48,479 The only one who will believe it will be Katt Williams. 872 00:54:48,480 --> 00:54:51,640 He will be like, "I know that bastard is up to something! 873 00:54:55,280 --> 00:54:57,080 I know Kevin has raped those people." 874 00:55:01,120 --> 00:55:03,840 You know, I'm also very angry with Kevin. 875 00:55:05,160 --> 00:55:07,279 Do you know why? Okay, first of all, 876 00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:09,960 I don't even know Kevin as successful as he is. 877 00:55:12,520 --> 00:55:14,720 I found that crap in a difficult way. 878 00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:20,199 I was at home when my child entered. He said, "Daddy, I need $ 250." 879 00:55:20,200 --> 00:55:22,119 He is only 12 years old, so I panicked. 880 00:55:22,120 --> 00:55:24,480 "What happened, nigga? Did someone try to kill you?" 881 00:55:29,960 --> 00:55:31,999 He said, "No, no. 882 00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:34,679 Kevin Hart came to town, and I want to see the show." 883 00:55:34,680 --> 00:55:37,879 I said, "How much is it?" He said, "They're $ 125." 884 00:55:37,880 --> 00:55:40,400 I said, "God damn, I'm only 80." 885 00:55:43,320 --> 00:55:45,319 I said, "Why do you need $ 250, then?" 886 00:55:45,320 --> 00:55:49,320 He said, "Because I want to go with you, Daddy Please? 887 00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:51,560 And that's him. 888 00:55:52,560 --> 00:55:54,359 So, I took him to the show. 889 00:55:54,360 --> 00:55:56,359 And we go, we sit in front. 890 00:55:56,360 --> 00:56:00,319 Lights lights up, and one opening after the other continues. 891 00:56:00,320 --> 00:56:04,439 Then Kevin goes on stage. The crowd goes off to fucking nuts. 892 00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:07,800 Thousands of people. I'm very angry. 893 00:56:16,000 --> 00:56:18,600 The longer the show continues, I'm angry. 894 00:56:19,640 --> 00:56:22,359 Because the show is fucking amazing. 895 00:56:22,360 --> 00:56:24,719 It's annoying. These people are fucking fucking holding their stomachs. 896 00:56:24,720 --> 00:56:26,280 My son is slapping his knee. 897 00:56:27,520 --> 00:56:30,640 I'm like, "Damn, nigga, me also do this. " 898 00:56:35,760 --> 00:56:38,599 Kevin said, "Good evening." The crowd is going crazy. 899 00:56:38,600 --> 00:56:42,240 And then everyone starts walking to the door, and the lights turn on, 900 00:56:42,840 --> 00:56:46,359 and then my son just stood there, seeing the empty stage 901 00:56:46,360 --> 00:56:49,279 People push past me, and nobody recognizes me. 902 00:56:49,280 --> 00:56:51,120 I'm like, "Man, this place is fucking annoying!" 903 00:56:52,520 --> 00:56:54,360 I said, "Come on, kid, Let's go from here." 904 00:56:55,960 --> 00:56:58,759 Then my child looked at me and said, "Daddy, please. 905 00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:02,160 I'm like," Oh, my God. " 906 00:57:03,800 --> 00:57:06,799 So, I took him backstage. I've known Kevin for years , 907 00:57:06,800 --> 00:57:10,479 But can you believe I'm scared knocking on the door of his room? 908 00:57:10,480 --> 00:57:12,200 I almost said... 909 00:57:13,680 --> 00:57:16,040 "Son, I haven't seen him for a long time." 910 00:57:20,320 --> 00:57:22,720 And one of the goons Kevin opened the door. 911 00:57:23,720 --> 00:57:25,279 "Hey, what's up, Dave Chappelle? 912 00:57:25,280 --> 00:57:27,279 What are you doing, man Nice to meet you, brother. 913 00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:29,759 What are you doing in this area? This is a terrible area." 914 00:57:29,760 --> 00:57:32,240 I'm like, "Actually I live around here. Listening... 915 00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:38,920 is Kevin here 916 00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:41,759 My child just wants to meet him quickly." 917 00:57:41,760 --> 00:57:43,839 "I don't know, Because Kevin will have dinner." 918 00:57:43,840 --> 00:57:46,239 Right at that moment, Kevin appeared at the corner to see who it was 919 00:57:46,240 --> 00:57:49,319 "Oh, what, Dave? Come back 920 00:57:49,320 --> 00:57:51,799 I just want to have dinner. I don't know if you eat, 921 00:57:51,800 --> 00:57:53,679 but you're welcome to join me if you want." 922 00:57:53,680 --> 00:57:55,719 And then my son pushed me past me. That is bullshit. 923 00:57:55,720 --> 00:58:00,480 He said, "Actually, Mr. Hart, We haven't eaten in a few hours." 924 00:58:06,840 --> 00:58:11,319 Man, Kevin took us to his room. This person has spread. 925 00:58:11,320 --> 00:58:14,359 It was Tuesday night. This bastard is having Sunday dinner 926 00:58:14,360 --> 00:58:17,639 There is steak, meat, corn with butter on top. 927 00:58:17,640 --> 00:58:19,919 My child is eating all fast, embarrassing me I'm like, "Slow down, kid." He is like... 928 00:58:19,920 --> 00:58:21,440 Then I look at the corner, and there is a box 929 00:58:33,120 --> 00:58:36,840 custom-made jerseys for local teams 930 00:58:37,560 --> 00:58:40,399 Each one is sewn by hand, 931 00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:42,039 and behind, they sewed the "K-Hart" on all of them. 932 00:58:42,040 --> 00:58:47,239 Kevin saw me staring at the box, 933 00:58:47,240 --> 00:58:49,360 and he goes and grabs one of those shirts, 934 00:58:50,080 --> 00:58:52,440 and he walked towards my child. 935 00:58:52,960 --> 00:58:55,320 He said, "Hey, little one. I want you to have this." 936 00:58:55,840 --> 00:58:59,559 And my child is like, "Thank you, Mr. Hart." This is when I'm angry. 937 00:58:59,560 --> 00:59:02,199 938 00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:04,359 He left, "If your father makes you angry, 939 00:59:04,360 --> 00:59:05,840 put it." And he walks out. 940 00:59:11,840 --> 00:59:13,720 Oh, that's bullshit. 941 00:59:17,120 --> 00:59:19,679 Then I realized... I looked up what Kevin made on Google. 942 00:59:19,680 --> 00:59:21,279 I don't believe that nonsense. 943 00:59:21,280 --> 00:59:24,720 Kevin is the first comedian that a Drake song could be about. 944 00:59:26,440 --> 00:59:29,279 Kevin can walk around his house and sing "All Me," 945 00:59:29,280 --> 00:59:31,080 and the whole song remains true. 946 00:59:31,880 --> 00:59:34,960 "I have everything, I have everything 947 00:59:35,720 --> 00:59:38,159 I can't complain, I can't complain 948 00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:41,279 I don't even know How I really made it 949 00:59:41,280 --> 00:59:43,399 I forgot, this is a lot 950 00:59:43,400 --> 00:59:45,319 Fuck that, especially what I got " 951 00:59:45,320 --> 00:59:46,919 And his wife will be like, " Kevin, let's sleep! " 952 00:59:46,920 --> 00:59:49,439 He'll be like... " Ho, shut up 953 00:59:49,440 --> 00:59:50,640 I'm too much... " 954 00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:59,960 You know how much money you have to have to tell a girl to close the fuck up? 955 01:00:02,760 --> 01:00:05,760 I have" Calm down, help "money at best. 956 01:00:08,600 --> 01:00:11,280 I have to take a loan to "Shut your mouth." 957 01:00:12,520 --> 01:00:14,880 "Shut up..." It is money Jay Z. 958 01:00:15,800 --> 01:00:19,080 And Beyonc has "No, you close his mouth" money. Don't forget Don't forget 959 01:00:27,960 --> 01:00:30,479 I have never met Bill Cosby, so I did not defend him 960 01:00:30,480 --> 01:00:33,599 961 01:00:33,600 --> 01:00:36,599 Let's remember that it has a valuable inheritance 962 01:00:36,600 --> 01:00:38,799 that I can't just throw it away. 963 01:00:38,800 --> 01:00:42,559 I remember him being the first black man ever to win an Emmy on television. 964 01:00:42,560 --> 01:00:46,359 I also remember that he was the first person to make cartoons with black characters 965 01:00:46,360 --> 01:00:49,160 where their lips and nose are drawn proportionally. 966 01:00:50,760 --> 01:00:53,039 I remember that he had a television show 967 01:00:53,040 --> 01:00:56,799 which has the equivalent number to the Super Bowl every Thursday night. 968 01:00:56,800 --> 01:01:01,239 And I remember that he partnered with a clinical psychologist to confirm it that there is no negative image African-Americans on the show. 969 01:01:01,240 --> 01:01:06,279 I say, it's not a small thing. 970 01:01:06,280 --> 01:01:08,720 971 01:01:09,440 --> 01:01:13,760 I already have a television program. I won't do that shit. 972 01:01:15,600 --> 01:01:17,319 He gave tens of millions of dollars to African-American institutions from higher learning, 973 01:01:17,320 --> 01:01:19,639 and is directly responsible for thousands of people Black children will go to college. 974 01:01:19,640 --> 01:01:23,199 Not only people who are raped. 975 01:01:23,200 --> 01:01:25,040 This is the kicker. You are ready? 976 01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:33,920 This is the fact I heard, but not yet confirmed I heard when Martin Luther King stood on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial and said that he dreamed, 977 01:01:34,440 --> 01:01:36,879 he spoke to the PA system paid by Bill Cosby. 978 01:01:36,880 --> 01:01:40,959 979 01:01:40,960 --> 01:01:42,279 980 01:01:42,280 --> 01:01:47,799 981 01:01:47,800 --> 01:01:50,839 So, you understand what I'm saying? The point is this: 982 01:01:50,840 --> 01:01:53,799 He raped, but he saved. 983 01:01:53,800 --> 01:01:56,639 And he saves more than just rape. 984 01:01:56,640 --> 01:01:58,799 But he might do rape. 985 01:01:58,800 --> 01:02:01,280 Thank you very much! Good night! 986 01:02:28,920 --> 01:02:32,439 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! 987 01:02:32,440 --> 01:02:37,160 I forgot. The fourth time I met OJ Simpson. 988 01:02:41,960 --> 01:02:44,239 The fourth time is not the funniest time, 989 01:02:44,240 --> 01:02:46,720 but this is the last time I will see Juice. 990 01:02:47,320 --> 01:02:50,239 For some reason, I'm in the Kentucky Derby. 991 01:02:50,240 --> 01:02:51,760 This is a very long story. 992 01:02:53,080 --> 01:02:55,720 This is true after I stopped Chappelle show 993 01:02:56,240 --> 01:02:57,960 in a spectacular way. 994 01:03:00,960 --> 01:03:02,879 There is a party held by by Michael Jordan, 995 01:03:02,880 --> 01:03:08,040 and every athlete I've ever admired is in that room 996 01:03:09,040 --> 01:03:10,240 Yes. 997 01:03:11,520 --> 01:03:16,039 And then I see a familiar face at the bar, standing there, drinking alone 998 01:03:16,040 --> 01:03:18,320 That is Chris Tucker. Now... 999 01:03:20,240 --> 01:03:25,040 You must remember, right now, We are both technically lost. 1000 01:03:28,240 --> 01:03:30,439 And we leave, and we talk to each other, 1001 01:03:30,440 --> 01:03:32,679 and stunned bastard to see us together. 1002 01:03:32,680 --> 01:03:34,359 Seeing me and Chris Tucker at the time 1003 01:03:34,360 --> 01:03:37,120 it will be like seeing Bigfoot driving a unicorn 1004 01:03:37,920 --> 01:03:40,320 You will not believe That's what you see. 1005 01:03:42,080 --> 01:03:46,999 And then, through all the criminals, A familiar face breaks through the crowd. 1006 01:03:47,000 --> 01:03:48,280 Here it is again. 1007 01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:50,560 Juice. 1008 01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:54,839 He prepared the camera. He's like, "Dave, Chris. 1009 01:03:56,480 --> 01:03:59,119 Hey, come on, buddy. Let's all get together to take pictures." 1010 01:03:59,120 --> 01:04:02,480 And at the same time, I and Chris like, "No. 1011 01:04:03,360 --> 01:04:04,520 I can't do that 1012 01:04:07,400 --> 01:04:11,160 Sorry, Juice, my career is too thin to survive by taking pictures." 1013 01:04:13,440 --> 01:04:15,120 That's the end. Good night. 1014 01:04:37,640 --> 01:04:40,800 One last thing. Before you leave, 1015 01:04:41,480 --> 01:04:44,399 I just want to admit for true comedy fans. 1016 01:04:44,400 --> 01:04:45,799 We can't not know it. 1017 01:04:45,800 --> 01:04:49,119 We lost the damn giant in this week's comedy 1018 01:04:49,120 --> 01:04:52,479 So, I just shouted out the family and friends of Garry Shandling. 1019 01:04:52,480 --> 01:04:56,719 Lots of love for you. My sincere sayings. 1020 01:04:56,720 --> 01:04:59,480 And for hip-hop fans in the building... 1021 01:05:01,040 --> 01:05:04,319 put two fingers in the air for A Tribe Called Quest 1022 01:05:04,320 --> 01:05:05,879 and my dear Phife Dawg. 1023 01:05:05,880 --> 01:05:08,199 May he rest in peace forever and forever. 1024 01:05:08,200 --> 01:05:09,959 Thank you for the beautiful music. 1025 01:05:09,960 --> 01:05:11,600 Good evening everyone. Thank you. 1026 01:05:15,640 --> 01:05:20,319 Twos up! Twos up! Hands up, raise your hand! Twos up! 1027 01:05:20,320 --> 01:05:23,800 We will do this for Phife! I need everyone to rap with me right now! 1028 01:07:02,360 --> 01:07:03,760 I'm rich, man!