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Fixed & Synced by bozxphd. Enjoy The Flick
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It started out as just another
day of living the dream.
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In Montreal, I had
become a fan favorite.
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They would shower me with tiny
foil balls of hash in the bullpen
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and lower down little
bottles of Tequila.
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A record take of 67 bottles
in two months one season.
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And the good stuff, too.
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I loved the life of getting paid to
play the greatest game on earth.
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Sometimes I thought
to myself that maybe
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I'd even do it for free.
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Bill Lee takes the ball today.
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Good-looking kid out of
Southern California.
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He's very quotable.
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You know, his teammates have started
calling him "the spaceman."
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Lee is really on top
of his game these days.
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Well, he's certainly
not afraid to speak his mind.
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He referred to Red Sox manager
don Zimmer as "the gerbil."
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He may not know how
to keep his mouth shut,
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but he plays the game
the right way.
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Handles a bat well, too.
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Looks like he finally wore
out his welcome in Boston.
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Bill Lee has to be considered
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one of the top lefties
of all of baseball.
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The spaceman
just keeps on competing
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and has put together a fine
season for the Montreal expos.
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Left to center?
Yeah, I guess so.
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He's actually a little bit
left of Che Guevara.
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Once again,
bill Lee works out of a jam.
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You can't help but feel he's always
one step ahead of the hitter.
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Well, there's only one spaceman.
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Stop. Stop.
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Bill Lee. Present and accounted
for, drill sergeant.
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Uh-uh. This gate don't open
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till one hour before game time.
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That's like, um,
five minutes from now.
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Eh. You can go in through
gate a or gate d.
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Just not this one, gate c, huh?
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When the hell did
they make that rule?
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Look, I can come in,
I'm on the team.
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Yes.
In, uh, four minutes.
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Okay.
Let's start over.
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I don't think that
we've officially met.
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My name's Lee.
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I swore to you I'm on
the team, all right?
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I'm a pitcher. Left-handed pitcher.
Lanceur.
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I won 17 games three years in a row.
I can come in.
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Of course.
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Bill Lee!
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Sorry about that...
Ah, it's okay.
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You just don't look Chinese. No.
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No, I sure don't.
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You gonna let me in?
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Three minutes.
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Thank you!
Merci Beaucoup.
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Hey, stop, huh?
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Bye-bye.
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Somebody stop him!
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Heard you shut down the
cul-de-sac again last night.
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Yeah, I was tucked in
by midnight.
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You know, you guys are like the
gestapo with your spies around town.
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Losing five straight
this early on will do that.
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People start to panic.
What?
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Ace from space!
You throwing today?
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I hope so. Hey, how's
your wife doing?
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I think they found
what they were looking for.
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And thank you for the Jersey.
My son went crazy over it.
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Thank you! He brought it
to school, everything.
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Thanks.
Good luck tonight.
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You know, we won the
damn division last year.
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How about some Patience? Like,
give us some time to gel.
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Not sure Patience is a
high priority right now.
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Everyone's on edge.
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Yeah, well, they should be.
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We're facing Fernando tonight.
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You hear anything about a
drug problem on this team?
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Why do you guys always come asking
me for these kinds of things?
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Gee, I don't know. Maybe
because you are on the cover
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of high times magazine.
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Yeah, I know.
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Did you actually say you sprinkle
marijuana on your oatmeal?
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No, I said pancakes, okay?
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It makes me impervious to bus
fumes when I run to the ballpark.
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Big difference.
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You know, you should try it sometime.
It helps with anxiety.
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What are you guys doing here?
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Huh, careful! This might turn into a
drinking town with a baseball problem.
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What is it now?
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A hockey town with
a drinking problem.
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Bill, what do you think of the rumored
"drug problem" in this clubhouse?
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Don't answer that.
Pretty please.
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Well, there, uh,
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definitely is
a drug problem here.
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Whitman hasn't been able to score
anything good since spring training
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and he's starting
to get the shakes.
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Hey, bill, how do you think losing your
pal Rodney Scott's gonna affect the team?
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00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:51,510
Yeah bill, you gonna take a stand for
Rodney like you did for Bernie in Boston?
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Cool breeze!
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What the hell happened, man?
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I just got goddamn dropped.
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When?
Just now.
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Are you freaking kidding me?
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If I'm lying' I'm dying.
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You're one of our MVPS
god damn it.
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Where's Fulton?
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I'm done as a dog here, man.
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I have no idea
what I'm gonna do now.
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Hey, don't you worry, I'm gonna
go talk to Fulton right now.
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Bill.
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There ain't no use in getting
yourself all caught up in this mess.
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I got it.
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All right, take it easy, bill.
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I'm so freakin' outta here.
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Guys!
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This injustice can
no longer be tolerated!
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Now, who's with me?
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Uh, I'm with you.
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Come on.
Who's with me?
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Pussies.
Hey, bill.
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Fine, I'm going.
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Would you calm down, please?
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Crazy ass-cracker.
Bill! Hold on.
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Bill...
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What you gonna say to him?
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Tommy. Tommy!
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Fucking chickenshit.
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What're you... Hold
on, hold on, hold on.
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"This is bullshit.
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"I'll be at brasserie 77.
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"If you need me,
come and get me."
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All right, Rodney.
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Let's go. Let's get out of here.
Hey, bill...
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- Bill.
- What?
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Hold on for a second now, bill.
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Now look, the thing is I gotta
finish packing up my things
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and they're supposed to bring out
the cold cuts any minute now.
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So I'll catch up
with you, all right?
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The cold cuts?
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You're gonna stick
around for the...
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I love charcuterie. Just go.
Go. Okay. Okay.
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Well, I'll meet you...
I'll see you there.
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So here's Ron Cey to lead off
the top half of the sixth.
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Bob James now on in relief.
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Oh!
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Next!
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Wow, you are unbelievable.
You know that?
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Yeah, yeah. Just payment.
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You're a thief.
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00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:12,884
Come on, you got to
pitch around this guy!
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Sandy, can I get
another one, please?
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00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:19,491
Do you mind turning on
the baseball game for me?
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00:09:19,493 --> 00:09:20,659
Sorry, hockey's on.
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00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:24,362
Might wanna slow down a little.
You're drinking those like water.
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00:09:24,364 --> 00:09:27,933
I never drink water this fast.
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Hey, bill. Would you
like a shot of whiskey?
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00:09:30,837 --> 00:09:33,505
Oh, no. No, no, no.
No, thank you.
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In fact, I think I'm gonna head
back over to the ball park.
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Looks like they might
be needing me soon.
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Doesn't look like
Rodney's showing up.
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You're four deep. You
sure you wanna go pitch?
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That's actually five.
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And yeah, I'll be fine.
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You might want to turn on
that baseball game.
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You're about to witness
something special.
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Well, good luck.
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- He's there. He's got it.
- And that will end the inning.
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Look, I was ready to pitch!
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I could've held them and we
would've won the damn ballgame.
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00:10:20,354 --> 00:10:24,222
How am I supposed to help this team
when you don't fucking use me?
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00:10:24,224 --> 00:10:26,157
We are 20 plus games
into the season,
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and I've pitched,
what, 12 innings.
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00:10:28,195 --> 00:10:31,062
Are you completely
fucking crazy, Lee?
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00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:32,063
I might be a little bit
crazy, yeah.
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Do you honestly think I would put
you into a major league ball game
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00:10:36,637 --> 00:10:39,137
after you've been at a bar drinking?
Oh...
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You were lit!
I wasn't lit.
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00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:44,309
I had five beers... Five beers,
seven beers, ten beers...
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00:10:44,311 --> 00:10:47,312
I'd beat catfish
after having seven.
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00:10:48,014 --> 00:10:48,513
Okay?
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00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:49,914
You don't think that
we drink and smoke
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all goddamn game long
in the bullpen anyway?
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00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:53,685
That's not the point!
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00:10:53,687 --> 00:10:57,722
The point is
you abandoned your team!
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00:10:57,724 --> 00:10:59,557
You're a deserter.
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00:11:00,292 --> 00:11:01,760
A deserter.
185
00:11:02,194 --> 00:11:04,496
Where the fuck are we, Hanoi?
186
00:11:05,398 --> 00:11:10,068
Look, I was just trying to
make a statement. All right?
187
00:11:10,736 --> 00:11:13,304
Where is the compassion
on this team?
188
00:11:13,306 --> 00:11:14,873
Rodney has a family.
189
00:11:14,875 --> 00:11:17,575
Rodney Scott is none
of your business.
190
00:11:17,577 --> 00:11:19,344
None of my business?
191
00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:23,648
Rodney has given us everything
that he has for three years.
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00:11:23,650 --> 00:11:24,482
He has won ball games for us,
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00:11:24,484 --> 00:11:27,519
and he is one of the most decent
guys that we have on this team.
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00:11:27,521 --> 00:11:31,389
He's my fucking friend. And you
fucking lie to him over and over.
195
00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:35,660
This is a business, Lee, plain and simple.
It's a business.
196
00:11:35,662 --> 00:11:39,197
Rodney was batting .200.
Numbers don't lie.
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00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:40,498
Lee, listen.
198
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:41,933
You can't fight reality, Lee.
199
00:11:41,935 --> 00:11:44,836
Ever seen reality? You ever
noticed what reality is?
200
00:11:44,838 --> 00:11:47,472
Because you lose every time.
201
00:11:47,474 --> 00:11:51,609
Do you have a Webster's
dictionary in here or just
202
00:11:51,611 --> 00:11:53,244
comic books and porn?
203
00:11:53,246 --> 00:11:55,080
Why me? What did I
do to deserve him?
204
00:11:55,082 --> 00:12:01,219
I want you to look up the word
"integrity" and tell me what it says.
205
00:12:02,154 --> 00:12:02,887
That's enough.
206
00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:06,591
"Integrity is the essence
of everything successful."
207
00:12:06,593 --> 00:12:08,793
Buckminster Fuller said that.
208
00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:10,161
Who?
Yeah, exactly.
209
00:12:10,163 --> 00:12:15,900
I am sick and tired of this
intellectual bullshit!
210
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:19,771
This is baseball, not UCLA.
211
00:12:20,173 --> 00:12:26,411
Goodrich wants to see you in
his office bright and early.
212
00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:29,214
Now this is between
you and him now.
213
00:12:29,216 --> 00:12:30,682
Why can't he just
see me right now?
214
00:12:30,684 --> 00:12:33,618
He doesn't want to see you
in the state you're in.
215
00:12:33,620 --> 00:12:35,520
We're not in a state.
216
00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:36,287
We're in a province.
217
00:12:36,289 --> 00:12:37,922
You would know that
if you went to college.
218
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:40,959
Oh, and by the way,
I went to USC, not UCLA,
219
00:12:40,961 --> 00:12:42,794
you ignorant fucking prick.
220
00:12:42,862 --> 00:12:45,296
Out. Now!
221
00:12:45,298 --> 00:12:47,265
Hmm...
Fucking push me?
222
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:48,600
Get out.
223
00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:59,544
"It's better to die
than to live in sleep."
224
00:13:00,012 --> 00:13:02,814
Shakespeare?
No, no, no...
225
00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:04,282
GI Gurdjieff.
226
00:13:04,284 --> 00:13:06,151
The Indian mystic.
227
00:13:08,754 --> 00:13:12,690
GI Gurdjieff...
The fuck out!
228
00:13:12,692 --> 00:13:15,193
I wasn't worried a bit.
229
00:13:15,195 --> 00:13:17,195
Hell, it wasn't even
the first time
230
00:13:17,197 --> 00:13:19,731
I had to walk off
a team to make a point.
231
00:13:19,733 --> 00:13:24,869
Back in Boston, I won 17
games, three years in a row.
232
00:13:24,871 --> 00:13:27,505
Even started game seven
of what many consider
233
00:13:27,507 --> 00:13:30,975
the greatest world series
ever played.
234
00:13:35,347 --> 00:13:35,880
Bill,
235
00:13:35,882 --> 00:13:39,684
last night Fisk hit one of the most
historic home runs of all time
236
00:13:39,686 --> 00:13:42,353
and tonight, you get the
ball for all the marbles.
237
00:13:42,355 --> 00:13:45,990
Reds manager, sparky Anderson
says that win or lose,
238
00:13:45,992 --> 00:13:49,027
his pitcher don Gullett is
going to the hall of fame.
239
00:13:49,029 --> 00:13:51,763
What do you have
to say about that?
240
00:13:51,765 --> 00:13:56,000
Well, win or lose, I'm
going to the Eliot lounge.
241
00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:58,203
There it is.
242
00:13:58,205 --> 00:14:00,972
A high drive. He was
waiting for that one.
243
00:14:00,974 --> 00:14:03,508
That one is gone
over everything.
244
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:06,311
We didn't win that
ball game, unfortunately.
245
00:14:06,313 --> 00:14:09,714
Tony Perez hit a curveball of
mine that hasn't landed yet.
246
00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:15,553
But I'd like to see you find don
Gullett's plaque hanging in Cooperstown.
247
00:14:15,621 --> 00:14:17,789
I however,
248
00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:18,991
I kept my end of the bargain.
249
00:14:24,129 --> 00:14:27,699
We called ourselves the loyal
order of the buffalo heads.
250
00:14:27,701 --> 00:14:33,204
It was me, Fergie Jenkins, Rick wise,
Jim Willoughby and Bernie Carbo.
251
00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:35,473
Bernie was a bit
out of control in hindsight.
252
00:14:35,475 --> 00:14:40,778
Well, I guess we all were, but, I
don't know. Maybe I'm projecting.
253
00:14:42,014 --> 00:14:45,917
Hey, what are you doing? Come back
here, you crazy motherfucker!
254
00:14:45,919 --> 00:14:48,386
Oh, we're screwed.
Oh, shit.
255
00:14:50,956 --> 00:14:53,224
I said to the gm...
256
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:56,027
How the hell
can you trade Carbo?
257
00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:57,996
This team needs a guy like him.
258
00:14:57,998 --> 00:15:00,131
I realize he's been
partying sort of hard
259
00:15:00,133 --> 00:15:04,569
and traveling with that crazy stuffed
gorilla, but he has a family.
260
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:06,971
Where is the compassion
around here?
261
00:15:06,973 --> 00:15:08,339
And he just said...
262
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:10,074
It's a business, bill.
263
00:15:10,076 --> 00:15:11,643
You'll learn soon enough.
264
00:15:11,645 --> 00:15:15,146
One day you'll understand
why we have rules.
265
00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:19,017
Om.
266
00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:23,054
Om.
267
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:26,157
Om.
268
00:15:28,494 --> 00:15:30,061
Om.
269
00:15:33,666 --> 00:15:35,199
Om.
270
00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:39,437
Om.
271
00:15:42,241 --> 00:15:44,075
Om.
272
00:15:47,346 --> 00:15:48,579
Jesus!
273
00:15:48,581 --> 00:15:51,716
Lee, how the hell
did you get in here?
274
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:53,584
Through the door.
275
00:15:53,586 --> 00:15:56,421
Always with
the smart answers, huh?
276
00:15:56,488 --> 00:15:58,489
Get the fuck off my desk, bill!
277
00:16:02,027 --> 00:16:03,795
You like games, huh, bill?
278
00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:05,830
How about we play
a fun little game, huh?
279
00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:08,566
And in this game, bill,
I ask you another question,
280
00:16:08,568 --> 00:16:11,302
we see if you can come up
with a clever answer.
281
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:12,603
Does that sound good?
Yeah.
282
00:16:12,605 --> 00:16:14,706
Okay.
Here's the question, bill.
283
00:16:14,708 --> 00:16:18,843
How do you feel about the fact that we
are about to release your insubordinate,
284
00:16:18,845 --> 00:16:23,448
over-the-hill ass immediately
from your contract?
285
00:16:23,450 --> 00:16:24,615
Releasing me?
286
00:16:24,617 --> 00:16:26,417
Under whose authority?
287
00:16:26,419 --> 00:16:29,253
The queen of fucking England.
What difference does it make?
288
00:16:29,255 --> 00:16:32,223
It's a done deal.
Pack up your shit.
289
00:16:32,225 --> 00:16:33,624
You don't have
the right to restrict
290
00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:36,661
my constitutional
freedom of expression.
291
00:16:36,663 --> 00:16:38,329
Oh, shit.
You know what, bill?
292
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:40,631
You're absolutely right.
I don't. I know.
293
00:16:40,633 --> 00:16:42,700
But what I do have
the right, bill,
294
00:16:42,702 --> 00:16:44,469
is to decide
who plays on this team,
295
00:16:44,471 --> 00:16:48,172
and who doesn't. And frankly,
we're going to really miss ya.
296
00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,608
Okay. Come on, we both know
that this team needs me.
297
00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:51,075
Maybe.
298
00:16:51,077 --> 00:16:54,412
But you know what, that's a risk
that we're very willing to take.
299
00:16:54,414 --> 00:16:56,781
And I need them. I do.
300
00:16:56,783 --> 00:16:59,550
I have a family,
my kids go to school here.
301
00:16:59,552 --> 00:17:00,485
They have friends.
302
00:17:00,487 --> 00:17:01,886
We can't move back
to the states.
303
00:17:01,888 --> 00:17:03,588
They only know
the metric system.
304
00:17:04,224 --> 00:17:05,990
Well, bill, this will give
them a chance
305
00:17:05,992 --> 00:17:08,826
to "expand their consciousness,"
as you like to say.
306
00:17:08,828 --> 00:17:11,462
You know what's funny,
is I hate this part of my job.
307
00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:13,798
You know, releasing players,
'cause normally,
308
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,066
right now is
the time when I say,
309
00:17:15,068 --> 00:17:17,301
"oh, I'm so sorry.
It's not personal.
310
00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:19,504
"It's business."
But today,
311
00:17:19,705 --> 00:17:21,472
it actually feels good,
to be honest,
312
00:17:21,474 --> 00:17:24,409
'cause I was gonna wait to
do this after the home stand.
313
00:17:24,411 --> 00:17:28,079
But since you're being here,
and such a fucking douchebag,
314
00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:31,249
why don't you just sign here,
and initial here?
315
00:17:31,251 --> 00:17:34,419
And you know what, bill,
we're done.
316
00:17:41,193 --> 00:17:42,627
You know what?
317
00:17:42,629 --> 00:17:45,063
You wanna cut me, go for it.
318
00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:49,467
There are plenty
of other clubs out there
319
00:17:49,469 --> 00:17:51,869
desperate for quality
left-handed pitching.
320
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:52,837
One of them will sign me.
321
00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:56,774
And then we're gonna come marching back
in here with the pennant on the line,
322
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:58,810
and I'm gonna beat you
in a game so bad
323
00:17:58,812 --> 00:18:02,180
that your future, future,
great grandsons will feel it
324
00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:05,450
like a swift kick in the nuts.
325
00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:08,019
That's my grandpa Forrest
for fuck's sake, bill.
326
00:18:08,021 --> 00:18:12,223
I tell you what, bill, I sincerely
believe that you believe that.
327
00:18:12,225 --> 00:18:16,027
One of them will sign me, someone who
appreciates me and lets me be myself.
328
00:18:16,029 --> 00:18:18,796
Somebody who knows how to treat
its employees with dignity.
329
00:18:18,798 --> 00:18:19,464
With respect and loyalty.
330
00:18:19,466 --> 00:18:24,368
Hey, do me a solid, when you find this
mythical team, see if they'd give me a job?
331
00:18:24,370 --> 00:18:26,037
Hey, bill! Come on back. What?
332
00:18:26,039 --> 00:18:29,107
Hey, unless you initial
it's not official.
333
00:18:29,109 --> 00:18:31,909
I got a t-shirt made
with that on it.
334
00:18:32,678 --> 00:18:34,045
There you go.
335
00:18:35,414 --> 00:18:36,848
Oh, that's mature, bill.
Yeah.
336
00:18:36,850 --> 00:18:38,649
That's mature.
Somebody will pick me up.
337
00:18:38,651 --> 00:18:41,853
Guaranteed, probably
later this afternoon.
338
00:18:41,855 --> 00:18:43,354
Don't count on it, bill.
339
00:18:43,356 --> 00:18:45,857
Don't fucking count on it.
340
00:18:51,396 --> 00:18:54,031
- You're listening to
- CFCF 600 Montreal.
341
00:18:54,033 --> 00:18:58,803
There is a disturbing rumor
circulating around town right now
342
00:18:58,805 --> 00:19:03,074
that the expos
have released bill Lee.
343
00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:06,811
Hopefully, it's just a rumor.
344
00:19:07,045 --> 00:19:10,047
Either way, this one
goes out to you, bill.
345
00:19:10,049 --> 00:19:13,217
It's Warren Zevon, bill Lee.
346
00:19:37,277 --> 00:19:40,211
Fuckin' expos...
347
00:19:43,148 --> 00:19:44,482
Fuck! Fuck!
348
00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:32,897
I got a brother, he's got a fishing
outfit in the eastern townships.
349
00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:34,165
You can get a job there.
350
00:20:34,167 --> 00:20:36,000
It's all the COD you can eat.
351
00:20:36,535 --> 00:20:38,636
Hydroponics.
352
00:20:38,638 --> 00:20:39,537
Hydroponics.
353
00:20:39,539 --> 00:20:41,606
Trust me, it's gonna
be big one day.
354
00:20:41,608 --> 00:20:43,641
Ever think about
going into politics, bill?
355
00:20:43,643 --> 00:20:47,845
Hey, would you village idiots
shut the fuck up already.
356
00:20:49,681 --> 00:20:50,715
Dickie Dennis.
357
00:20:50,717 --> 00:20:52,383
This strapping
young man right here
358
00:20:52,385 --> 00:20:55,753
is a goddamn professional
baseball player.
359
00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:56,387
That's right, goddammit.
360
00:20:56,389 --> 00:20:59,056
He doesn't need to be growing
weed on a fishing boat
361
00:20:59,058 --> 00:21:01,392
while running for the
senate for his livelihood.
362
00:21:01,394 --> 00:21:04,528
Fuck no, he needs to
be throwing a baseball.
363
00:21:04,530 --> 00:21:07,231
Because it is a god given talent.
That's right.
364
00:21:07,233 --> 00:21:08,966
And the spaceman here
is an icon,
365
00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:11,202
he's bigger than the game itself.
Okay, all right, dick.
366
00:21:11,204 --> 00:21:13,204
And the game needs fellas like this.
That's enough.
367
00:21:13,206 --> 00:21:15,806
No, no, no.
Let's get another one.
368
00:21:15,808 --> 00:21:18,042
I got a way of getting
you back on the mound.
369
00:21:18,044 --> 00:21:21,212
A word in my office,
s'il vous plait.
370
00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:23,914
Okay, I can't wait
to hear this one.
371
00:21:23,916 --> 00:21:27,184
Yep.
Right, Larry, thank you.
372
00:21:27,186 --> 00:21:30,221
So how's the new novel
coming along there, dick?
373
00:21:30,223 --> 00:21:33,758
Great. Just waiting on
notes from the editor.
374
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:35,993
He's real excited
about this one.
375
00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:38,596
Isn't that what you said
about the last one?
376
00:21:38,697 --> 00:21:41,432
Yeah, and the one before that.
377
00:21:41,700 --> 00:21:43,768
But this is not about
my bad luck streak.
378
00:21:43,770 --> 00:21:46,337
It is about
your bad luck streak.
379
00:21:46,805 --> 00:21:49,540
You got a plan?
Yeah, I got a plan.
380
00:21:49,542 --> 00:21:51,142
What is it? My plan is
to wait by the phone
381
00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:53,411
and just wait for the
offers to come rolling in.
382
00:21:53,413 --> 00:21:54,312
That's my plan.
383
00:21:54,314 --> 00:21:56,280
What if your phone don't ring?
384
00:21:56,282 --> 00:21:56,614
It will.
385
00:21:56,616 --> 00:22:00,584
I gotta be honest with you, bill.
You're 35 years old.
386
00:22:00,719 --> 00:22:05,122
You're not over the hill just yet, but
you're not a spring chicken either.
387
00:22:05,124 --> 00:22:07,224
Satchel Paige threw
three scoreless innings
388
00:22:07,226 --> 00:22:10,027
against the Red Sox
when he was 59 years old.
389
00:22:10,029 --> 00:22:12,496
I'm well aware of that fact.
390
00:22:13,065 --> 00:22:16,033
And that's why
I got a real plan.
391
00:22:16,868 --> 00:22:18,636
What we're gonna do...
392
00:22:18,904 --> 00:22:20,237
We're gonna write letters
393
00:22:20,239 --> 00:22:21,872
to every single team
in major league baseball.
394
00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:26,010
We're gonna let 'em know that you are
healthy, ready, and available to play.
395
00:22:26,012 --> 00:22:28,746
You mean every team
in the national league?
396
00:22:29,881 --> 00:22:30,848
Why?
Oh.
397
00:22:30,850 --> 00:22:32,283
I won't be able to hit
in the American league.
398
00:22:32,285 --> 00:22:36,087
I don't think we should
cut the cloth quite so fine.
399
00:22:36,089 --> 00:22:37,054
I gotta hit, I gotta hit,
400
00:22:37,056 --> 00:22:39,123
and that means being part
of the national league.
401
00:22:39,125 --> 00:22:42,293
Yeah, but you're cutting
our options in half.
402
00:22:42,295 --> 00:22:44,028
What do you mean,
"our options?"
403
00:22:44,030 --> 00:22:45,329
What is this?
404
00:22:45,331 --> 00:22:46,263
It means I'll be your agent.
405
00:22:46,265 --> 00:22:49,734
Just for
a nominal fee, you know?
406
00:22:49,736 --> 00:22:51,836
Whatever the industry
standard is.
407
00:22:51,838 --> 00:22:52,937
I don't know that.
408
00:22:52,939 --> 00:22:57,074
I've been just fine on my own without
an agent for all these years.
409
00:22:57,076 --> 00:22:58,309
Oh, really?
Yeah.
410
00:22:58,311 --> 00:23:01,078
Yeah. What do you know about
being an agent, anyway?
411
00:23:01,080 --> 00:23:04,148
Where is your career right now?
412
00:23:04,150 --> 00:23:08,185
Professional representation
is where the sport is headed.
413
00:23:08,187 --> 00:23:09,620
So why don't you do
what you do best,
414
00:23:09,622 --> 00:23:11,055
you let me do what I do best.
415
00:23:11,057 --> 00:23:14,091
And what is it exactly
that you do best?
416
00:23:15,428 --> 00:23:17,628
Now you're just
trying to hurt me.
417
00:23:20,031 --> 00:23:23,000
How long have we known each other?
How many years?
418
00:23:23,002 --> 00:23:24,168
I don't know.
Too damn long.
419
00:23:24,170 --> 00:23:27,304
And in that time, we've gone
through a lot of shit together.
420
00:23:27,306 --> 00:23:29,340
- A whole lot.
- Yeah.
421
00:23:29,474 --> 00:23:30,741
I got people ask me
all the time,
422
00:23:30,743 --> 00:23:32,009
"what's bill Lee, really like?
423
00:23:32,011 --> 00:23:37,047
"Is he really as big of a flake and a
stoner as they make him out to be?"
424
00:23:37,049 --> 00:23:38,482
You know what
I tell those people?
425
00:23:38,484 --> 00:23:40,017
What do you tell those people?
426
00:23:40,019 --> 00:23:41,585
I tell them the truth.
427
00:23:41,587 --> 00:23:42,052
Which is?
428
00:23:42,054 --> 00:23:45,823
I tell them that bill Lee is one
hell of a fine left-handed pitcher.
429
00:23:45,825 --> 00:23:50,194
And he's also one of the most
thoughtful players I've ever met.
430
00:23:50,829 --> 00:23:52,863
You're incredibly well-read
and you're bright.
431
00:23:52,865 --> 00:23:54,465
And I've known a lot
of great players in my time
432
00:23:54,467 --> 00:23:56,767
but I've never known
another one like you.
433
00:23:56,769 --> 00:23:57,968
But you gotta face it, kid.
434
00:23:57,970 --> 00:24:00,204
Business is not
your strong suit.
435
00:24:03,175 --> 00:24:05,042
So, come on board.
436
00:24:05,477 --> 00:24:07,645
And let's get you
back where you belong.
437
00:24:07,647 --> 00:24:09,647
On a major league mound.
438
00:24:18,190 --> 00:24:21,258
Viva la spaceman!
439
00:24:22,494 --> 00:24:23,861
Here.
440
00:24:23,863 --> 00:24:26,063
Let me buy you a real drink.
441
00:24:26,999 --> 00:24:30,501
No, no, no, no, no. I gotta be in...
I gotta be in early tonight.
442
00:24:30,503 --> 00:24:32,336
Oh, yeah?
Where do you gotta be?
443
00:24:32,338 --> 00:24:33,037
Got the kids this weekend.
444
00:24:33,039 --> 00:24:36,574
Oh, he's got the kids
this weekend.
445
00:24:36,576 --> 00:24:39,410
Come on, don't be a pussy.
446
00:24:39,578 --> 00:24:40,945
Just one.
447
00:24:47,586 --> 00:24:49,253
Daddy!
Daddy!
448
00:24:49,255 --> 00:24:50,554
Wake up.
Wake up!
449
00:24:50,556 --> 00:24:51,489
Wake up.
Wake up!
450
00:24:51,491 --> 00:24:53,991
Come on. Wake up!
451
00:24:54,392 --> 00:24:55,860
I got an a on my French test.
452
00:24:55,862 --> 00:24:58,529
Good job there, kiddo.
453
00:24:58,531 --> 00:24:59,864
Show-off.
454
00:24:59,998 --> 00:25:02,166
Are you sad you lost your job?
455
00:25:02,168 --> 00:25:04,001
They saw it on the news.
456
00:25:04,003 --> 00:25:05,402
Oh, hey.
457
00:25:05,404 --> 00:25:06,837
Should we go to
the park for a bit,
458
00:25:06,839 --> 00:25:08,372
give you a chance
to sleep some more?
459
00:25:08,374 --> 00:25:10,708
No, no, no, no.
I'm up.
460
00:25:10,710 --> 00:25:11,876
I'm up!
461
00:25:11,878 --> 00:25:13,410
We are going to
the history museum today
462
00:25:13,412 --> 00:25:15,880
and we're gonna go check
out the spider pavilion.
463
00:25:15,882 --> 00:25:19,083
Why don't you ask your mom
if she wants to come with us.
464
00:25:19,551 --> 00:25:22,653
You wanna come?
You guys have fun.
465
00:25:22,655 --> 00:25:24,321
Kids, if you need
anything at all, call me.
466
00:25:24,323 --> 00:25:26,657
I'll be at grandma's all weekend.
Okay? Okay.
467
00:25:26,659 --> 00:25:29,760
Love you. Love you
too, mom, bye.
468
00:25:31,496 --> 00:25:33,197
Dad, we're hungry.
469
00:25:33,899 --> 00:25:36,934
All right. Food... You
know where the food's at.
470
00:25:42,208 --> 00:25:44,241
Look, it's just temporary.
471
00:25:44,309 --> 00:25:46,777
Your father still has
a lot left in the tank.
472
00:25:46,779 --> 00:25:51,048
And the universe has a way of rewarding
people who are in the right.
473
00:25:51,050 --> 00:25:52,216
We're gonna find a new team.
474
00:25:52,218 --> 00:25:54,218
Can I still root for Montreal?
475
00:25:54,220 --> 00:25:57,354
Players. Just not
the management.
476
00:25:57,889 --> 00:25:59,757
What's gonna be the new team?
477
00:25:59,759 --> 00:26:01,292
I don't know yet, sweetie.
478
00:26:01,294 --> 00:26:03,294
But, we'll find out soon enough.
479
00:26:08,967 --> 00:26:10,167
Ah...
480
00:26:10,569 --> 00:26:14,638
But right now we're gonna
do a little teamwork.
481
00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:17,308
All right, we are
gonna write letters
482
00:26:17,310 --> 00:26:20,511
to every team in the national
league asking for a job.
483
00:26:20,513 --> 00:26:23,480
Should we tell them that your
era was best on the team?
484
00:26:23,482 --> 00:26:25,282
And you were second
in games pitched?
485
00:26:25,284 --> 00:26:27,585
Uh, I think they know
that, sweetheart.
486
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,688
But sometimes people
make mistakes.
487
00:26:30,690 --> 00:26:33,457
They get angry and they lose
control of their emotions.
488
00:26:33,459 --> 00:26:36,193
Have you ever lost control
of your emotions?
489
00:26:36,561 --> 00:26:37,428
Oh, yeah.
490
00:26:37,430 --> 00:26:38,429
Yeah, we all do.
491
00:26:38,431 --> 00:26:40,698
It's just part of being a
member of the human species.
492
00:26:40,700 --> 00:26:43,667
I thought we were mammals.
493
00:26:43,669 --> 00:26:44,868
We are mammals.
494
00:26:44,870 --> 00:26:46,003
We're both.
495
00:26:46,005 --> 00:26:49,173
Mammals is our class
and primate is our order.
496
00:26:49,175 --> 00:26:51,742
You see, that is why
you go to school.
497
00:27:19,871 --> 00:27:21,138
Hmm.
498
00:27:23,308 --> 00:27:26,076
Hey.
Bonjour. Good morning.
499
00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:28,345
My name is Gino Lapue
500
00:27:28,347 --> 00:27:29,680
and this is Claude.
501
00:27:29,682 --> 00:27:31,148
You boys Mormons?
502
00:27:31,150 --> 00:27:33,050
'Cause I'm in no mood for
prophesizing this morning.
503
00:27:33,052 --> 00:27:35,586
This soul is far beyond saving.
504
00:27:35,588 --> 00:27:37,388
No, we are not Mormons.
505
00:27:37,390 --> 00:27:39,423
We are from
the Longueuil senators.
506
00:27:39,425 --> 00:27:42,026
Politicians? Shit, now I
wish you were Mormons.
507
00:27:42,028 --> 00:27:44,028
So sorry to disturb you,
508
00:27:44,129 --> 00:27:46,797
but we come bearing
an opportunity.
509
00:27:47,432 --> 00:27:52,102
Bill, how much would you
like to be pitching again?
510
00:27:52,270 --> 00:27:54,338
Did you guys buy the team?
511
00:27:54,340 --> 00:27:57,975
No, no, we want you
to play for us.
512
00:27:58,143 --> 00:27:58,776
Who's us?
513
00:27:58,778 --> 00:28:01,445
Local church league
softball team?
514
00:28:01,579 --> 00:28:04,381
Um, I manage
the Longueuil senators,
515
00:28:04,383 --> 00:28:06,884
of the Quebec
men's senior league.
516
00:28:06,886 --> 00:28:08,118
Senior league?
517
00:28:08,120 --> 00:28:09,253
Yeah, we play hardball.
518
00:28:09,255 --> 00:28:10,587
Yeah.
Two games a week.
519
00:28:10,589 --> 00:28:11,889
Some very nice players.
520
00:28:11,891 --> 00:28:14,458
Yeah, yeah.
No, Merci Beaucoup.
521
00:28:14,460 --> 00:28:16,627
Uh, I don't play
senior baseball.
522
00:28:16,629 --> 00:28:18,529
And who's Marcel
Marceau over here?
523
00:28:18,531 --> 00:28:19,663
And why doesn't he speak?
524
00:28:19,665 --> 00:28:21,265
This is Claude.
This is our catcher.
525
00:28:21,267 --> 00:28:24,068
While he doesn't speak very
much English, but trust me,
526
00:28:24,070 --> 00:28:26,737
he's great behind the plate. Ah.
527
00:28:26,739 --> 00:28:27,938
Listen, listen.
528
00:28:27,940 --> 00:28:31,508
We've already spoken to the
ministry of sports on your behalf.
529
00:28:31,510 --> 00:28:35,579
And they agreed to reinstate
your amateur status.
530
00:28:35,581 --> 00:28:36,280
Amateur?
531
00:28:36,282 --> 00:28:38,082
Who the hell are you
showing up on my doorstep
532
00:28:38,084 --> 00:28:39,883
and calling me
amateur, Pepe Le pew?
533
00:28:39,885 --> 00:28:41,885
I'm a big leaguer, goddammit.
534
00:28:41,887 --> 00:28:44,688
I've been to battle with
guys like yaz and Fisk.
535
00:28:44,690 --> 00:28:46,724
Twice the men you'll ever be.
536
00:28:46,726 --> 00:28:47,291
And we know this.
537
00:28:47,293 --> 00:28:50,661
This is why we very much want
you to join our pitching staff.
538
00:28:50,663 --> 00:28:52,730
We play only 10 minutes
away from here.
539
00:28:52,732 --> 00:28:54,531
Against who?
The local Kiwanis club?
540
00:28:54,533 --> 00:28:57,701
Some very competitive teams
from nearby cities.
541
00:28:57,703 --> 00:29:01,638
Uh, Verdun. Sorel.
Mascouche.
542
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:03,073
Mascouche.
Mascouche is nice.
543
00:29:03,075 --> 00:29:04,441
Oh, yeah. Quebec city. Uh...
544
00:29:04,443 --> 00:29:07,878
Trois-rivieres. Yeah. Great
team over in Trois-rivieres.
545
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:10,180
Great.
Does it pay anything?
546
00:29:16,521 --> 00:29:21,692
Yeah. We may be able to
help with gas money. Maybe.
547
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:23,627
Yeah, okay, uh, you're
gonna have to speak
548
00:29:23,629 --> 00:29:25,162
with my representatives
on this matter.
549
00:29:25,164 --> 00:29:27,231
We happen to be in
the middle of a very heated
550
00:29:27,233 --> 00:29:29,867
bidding war over
my services at the moment.
551
00:29:29,869 --> 00:29:30,801
Yeah, we understand that.
552
00:29:30,803 --> 00:29:34,371
Okay. This is just an open invitation.
Let's go.
553
00:29:34,439 --> 00:29:35,739
Feel free to think it over.
554
00:29:35,741 --> 00:29:38,909
Yeah, sorry, guys, I just
don't see this in the cards.
555
00:29:38,911 --> 00:29:42,146
It's not you, it's me, trust me.
It's just timing.
556
00:29:42,148 --> 00:29:45,749
No problem. We wish
you good luck always.
557
00:29:47,752 --> 00:29:49,052
But hey,
558
00:29:49,888 --> 00:29:53,290
say the stars were
to align for you boys,
559
00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:55,526
how soon would you need me?
560
00:29:56,394 --> 00:29:59,530
We have a game tomorrow night.
561
00:29:59,631 --> 00:30:00,531
Could I hit cleanup?
562
00:30:00,533 --> 00:30:03,133
You can hit anywhere
you want in the lineup.
563
00:30:03,135 --> 00:30:04,601
Anywhere.
564
00:30:05,270 --> 00:30:07,704
Just think about it,
but no pressure, huh?
565
00:30:08,039 --> 00:30:11,408
All right, well, maybe I'll
stop by and say hello sometime.
566
00:30:11,410 --> 00:30:12,242
Anytime.
567
00:30:12,244 --> 00:30:14,812
Spaceman.
568
00:30:14,814 --> 00:30:16,547
All right.
569
00:30:16,915 --> 00:30:23,854
"To whom
it may concern..."
570
00:30:25,123 --> 00:30:26,156
Oh, let me sign it.
I gotta sign it.
571
00:30:26,158 --> 00:30:30,260
The truth is, I wasn't ready for
the damn beer leagues quite yet.
572
00:30:30,262 --> 00:30:34,097
No disrespect, but I still
wanted to strike out Garvey,
573
00:30:34,099 --> 00:30:36,300
not Jacques from accounting.
574
00:30:36,302 --> 00:30:37,568
My brood and I sat down together
575
00:30:37,570 --> 00:30:41,738
and sent letters to each of the
other 11 national league teams.
576
00:30:41,740 --> 00:30:44,641
They were heartfelt and honest.
577
00:30:44,643 --> 00:30:46,210
Now it was just
a matter of sitting back
578
00:30:46,212 --> 00:30:49,179
and waiting to see which club
made the most attractive offer.
579
00:30:49,181 --> 00:30:55,552
And like a good Buddhist, I intended to
stay entirely unattached to the results.
580
00:31:02,894 --> 00:31:04,528
Hey.
581
00:31:26,017 --> 00:31:27,517
What the...
582
00:31:43,435 --> 00:31:45,202
Sully...
583
00:31:45,204 --> 00:31:46,270
Sully, you cocksucker.
584
00:31:46,272 --> 00:31:47,437
What are you doing with my mail?
585
00:31:47,439 --> 00:31:49,206
What are you doing?
Are you in on this?
586
00:31:49,208 --> 00:31:51,575
I... no. I'm not in on nothing.
Where's the rest of my mail?
587
00:31:51,577 --> 00:31:53,477
I'm delivering the mail.
588
00:31:53,479 --> 00:31:54,511
You let go of my bag.
589
00:31:54,513 --> 00:31:57,214
Give it to me. I'm a
government employee!
590
00:32:12,263 --> 00:32:14,331
That's not yours.
So long, Sully.
591
00:32:14,399 --> 00:32:15,465
See you tomorrow.
Okay!
592
00:32:21,739 --> 00:32:24,241
- Hey, hey!
- What?
593
00:32:24,243 --> 00:32:25,575
Pittsburgh!
594
00:32:25,577 --> 00:32:26,677
What?
Pittsburgh.
595
00:32:26,679 --> 00:32:30,414
Yep. You know, I always
wanted to live in Pittsburgh.
596
00:32:30,416 --> 00:32:32,249
Really?
No, well...
597
00:32:32,251 --> 00:32:33,583
You know, all right.
598
00:32:33,585 --> 00:32:34,952
"Dear bill. Thank you
for your thoughtful letter.
599
00:32:34,954 --> 00:32:37,688
"Indeed, we finished last
season in dead last place.
600
00:32:37,690 --> 00:32:40,524
"Yes, our pitching staff
is in such dire shape
601
00:32:40,526 --> 00:32:43,927
"that we don't know how we are
going to get through this season."
602
00:32:45,864 --> 00:32:50,867
"However, we have enough problems
without adding you to the mix.
603
00:32:50,869 --> 00:32:54,938
"We will not be requiring
your services at this time."
604
00:32:56,941 --> 00:32:58,976
Hey, you know what?
605
00:33:00,578 --> 00:33:02,079
Fuck those guys.
606
00:33:02,081 --> 00:33:03,947
Fuck 'em.
607
00:33:03,949 --> 00:33:06,516
We got a positive
mental attitude.
608
00:33:07,285 --> 00:33:10,087
That's' the way
to survive, my friend.
609
00:33:10,089 --> 00:33:12,422
Positive mental attitude.
610
00:33:16,361 --> 00:33:19,262
Where are you going?
It's in overtime.
611
00:34:52,156 --> 00:34:53,356
Here's one.
612
00:34:53,358 --> 00:34:56,126
Why do Canadians
do it doggy style?
613
00:34:56,627 --> 00:34:59,162
So they can both watch
the hockey game.
614
00:35:02,266 --> 00:35:03,600
Hey, fellas.
615
00:35:03,868 --> 00:35:05,569
Bill Lee.
Hmm.
616
00:35:06,270 --> 00:35:10,807
So, uh, who do I speak to about
getting a Jersey around here?
617
00:35:10,975 --> 00:35:13,944
Well, the equipment manager,
he'll be back in a sec.
618
00:35:13,946 --> 00:35:16,913
He just ran out to
pick up the catering.
619
00:35:18,217 --> 00:35:21,585
There's a Jersey and cap
in the garbage bag over there.
620
00:35:21,587 --> 00:35:24,988
We supply our own pants,
shoe and well,
621
00:35:26,090 --> 00:35:27,557
everything else.
622
00:35:29,293 --> 00:35:30,927
Yeah, well,
623
00:35:30,929 --> 00:35:32,896
I usually wear 37.
624
00:35:34,866 --> 00:35:36,199
Not today.
625
00:35:48,579 --> 00:35:49,646
Welcome.
626
00:35:49,648 --> 00:35:51,148
Oh, hey.
Hey.
627
00:35:52,618 --> 00:35:54,918
So, did you meet
some of the guys?
628
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:57,621
Yeah, it's a tough group.
629
00:35:57,623 --> 00:35:58,355
Yeah.
630
00:35:58,357 --> 00:36:00,690
So, where's
the rest of the team?
631
00:36:01,826 --> 00:36:04,194
So far, we only have
eight today.
632
00:36:04,196 --> 00:36:07,931
It is sometimes a challenge to
field with guys, unfortunately.
633
00:36:07,933 --> 00:36:08,298
Oh, Christ.
634
00:36:08,300 --> 00:36:12,369
Well, like I said, this is
a one night stand, so...
635
00:36:12,371 --> 00:36:12,736
Yeah.
636
00:36:12,738 --> 00:36:16,106
Any real fans coming to these
games or just local hobos?
637
00:36:16,440 --> 00:36:18,074
Mostly hobos.
638
00:36:18,076 --> 00:36:19,543
Nervous?
639
00:36:19,545 --> 00:36:23,680
Ah... no. No.
640
00:36:24,315 --> 00:36:25,682
Well...
641
00:36:26,517 --> 00:36:28,451
You better start
warming up, big guy.
642
00:36:28,453 --> 00:36:30,854
We're playing
new Brunswick tonight.
643
00:36:30,856 --> 00:36:33,790
They are the league champions
three years running.
644
00:36:33,792 --> 00:36:35,225
Oh, okay.
645
00:36:38,296 --> 00:36:39,663
Hmm.
646
00:36:41,832 --> 00:36:43,233
Thank you.
647
00:36:47,705 --> 00:36:49,372
What are they saying?
648
00:36:50,174 --> 00:36:51,508
Nothing good.
649
00:36:51,510 --> 00:36:54,711
Basically, they would like nothing
more than to beat us to a bloody pulp
650
00:36:54,713 --> 00:36:57,781
and then mount your head
on their wall for posterity.
651
00:36:57,783 --> 00:36:58,615
Okay, I get it.
652
00:36:58,617 --> 00:37:02,686
It's hunting season
and I'm the prized caribou.
653
00:37:03,054 --> 00:37:04,688
The biggest rack.
654
00:37:04,690 --> 00:37:06,456
Well, guess what?
655
00:37:06,724 --> 00:37:08,491
I live for this shit.
656
00:37:20,671 --> 00:37:25,775
Uh, I think you missed the exit for the
ice rink. This is baseball, frenchie.
657
00:37:25,777 --> 00:37:30,547
All right, listen, I throw all kinds
of shit, so I hope you can keep up.
658
00:37:30,549 --> 00:37:32,249
My bread and butter
is the off-speed stuff.
659
00:37:32,251 --> 00:37:35,685
Sliders, curves,
the occasional eephus.
660
00:37:35,687 --> 00:37:37,020
You with me?
661
00:37:38,923 --> 00:37:40,090
Okay, don't ask for a fastball
662
00:37:40,092 --> 00:37:41,224
because you ain't
getting it. All right?
663
00:37:41,226 --> 00:37:43,526
There are only have so many silver
bullets left in the chamber
664
00:37:43,528 --> 00:37:47,330
for guys like me and I sure as
fuck ain't wasting them out here.
665
00:37:48,366 --> 00:37:49,633
Got it?
666
00:37:50,268 --> 00:37:53,069
Oh, Christ. Can somebody
please translate?
667
00:37:54,605 --> 00:37:55,939
Hey.
Hey.
668
00:37:56,274 --> 00:38:00,543
Let's start anew here. My name is
bill Lee, formerly of nos amours.
669
00:38:00,545 --> 00:38:03,013
Joseph Cartwright,
formerly of El Detroit.
670
00:38:03,015 --> 00:38:04,447
Oh, the tigers?
671
00:38:04,449 --> 00:38:05,915
United auto workers.
672
00:38:05,917 --> 00:38:07,484
Oh. So you transferred?
673
00:38:07,486 --> 00:38:11,554
Uh, no, laid off. Married
a Quebecois woman and...
674
00:38:11,556 --> 00:38:13,690
Here we are.
675
00:38:14,525 --> 00:38:19,596
Oh, shit! Don't look now but I think I
just spotted a scout in the stands.
676
00:38:20,931 --> 00:38:21,798
That ain't no damn scout.
677
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,868
Definitely is. I think I
recognize him from Minnesota.
678
00:38:24,870 --> 00:38:26,536
Trust me. It's not.
679
00:38:26,538 --> 00:38:27,971
How do you know?
680
00:38:28,105 --> 00:38:29,172
That's my father-in-law.
681
00:38:29,174 --> 00:38:33,009
Hi! Woman next to him is
my wife, unfortunately.
682
00:38:33,844 --> 00:38:34,077
Hmm.
683
00:38:34,079 --> 00:38:38,248
Oh, I could've swore I
recognized him from the majors.
684
00:38:38,316 --> 00:38:40,450
Anyway, tell frenchie here
that it's gonna be
685
00:38:40,452 --> 00:38:42,218
the third signal in the series.
686
00:38:42,220 --> 00:38:43,386
No fastballs.
687
00:38:48,793 --> 00:38:51,728
Just tell him to trust me,
I know what I'm doing here.
688
00:39:04,375 --> 00:39:07,844
He says that he respects
that you're the big leaguer.
689
00:39:07,846 --> 00:39:09,145
Oh...
690
00:39:09,147 --> 00:39:10,447
Thank you.
691
00:39:44,482 --> 00:39:46,916
Fucking balls!
Yay!
692
00:40:40,171 --> 00:40:41,438
Here.
693
00:40:42,473 --> 00:40:45,074
Me, me, me...
694
00:40:45,076 --> 00:40:46,810
Ugh... oh...
695
00:41:00,324 --> 00:41:01,591
Strike!
696
00:41:14,505 --> 00:41:16,172
And he's
mid-stroke, right?
697
00:41:16,174 --> 00:41:18,208
And all of a sudden he hears
the husband come home.
698
00:41:18,210 --> 00:41:21,377
It must have been summer Fridays
or something. I don't know.
699
00:41:21,379 --> 00:41:22,412
Anyway, he finishes,
700
00:41:22,414 --> 00:41:25,048
he grabs his clothes and
then he jumps out the window
701
00:41:25,050 --> 00:41:27,750
buck naked, into a rose bush,
702
00:41:27,752 --> 00:41:29,652
he's got thorns everywhere.
703
00:41:29,654 --> 00:41:31,087
Goes on the fifteen day dl
704
00:41:31,089 --> 00:41:33,289
and guess what the papers said?
What?
705
00:41:33,291 --> 00:41:35,792
Tendonitis.
706
00:41:35,794 --> 00:41:38,862
And it wasn't me.
I swear to god, it wasn't me.
707
00:41:39,129 --> 00:41:40,597
I'm truly sorry
you're not interested
708
00:41:40,599 --> 00:41:41,631
in continuing to play with us.
709
00:41:41,633 --> 00:41:44,033
But you know, you're
always welcome back.
710
00:41:44,035 --> 00:41:45,401
Well, thank you, Gino.
I appreciate that.
711
00:41:45,403 --> 00:41:48,204
It's just that I got to figure out
which team I'm gonna be playing with.
712
00:41:48,206 --> 00:41:51,841
I gotta sort out my family situation.
You know the deal.
713
00:41:51,843 --> 00:41:52,809
Of course.
714
00:41:52,811 --> 00:41:55,745
All right, boys,
I'll see you around.
715
00:41:55,747 --> 00:41:57,247
Hey, hey, bill.
716
00:41:58,682 --> 00:41:59,616
Hold up.
717
00:41:59,618 --> 00:42:01,784
Hey, I want you to have this.
718
00:42:01,786 --> 00:42:03,853
No, Joe.
That's your Jersey.
719
00:42:03,855 --> 00:42:06,089
No, no.
You're 37.
720
00:42:06,091 --> 00:42:09,092
I want you to have it.
I insist.
721
00:42:09,426 --> 00:42:11,995
Hey, you might want
to give that a scrub, huh?
722
00:42:11,997 --> 00:42:14,063
Maybe twice.
723
00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:18,234
I appreciate it.
724
00:42:20,237 --> 00:42:22,238
You take care.
Good luck.
725
00:42:22,240 --> 00:42:23,806
Later, boys!
726
00:42:26,745 --> 00:42:28,111
Bye, bye.
727
00:42:28,113 --> 00:42:30,446
Yes, hi.
It's dick Dennis.
728
00:42:30,448 --> 00:42:33,216
Uh, just following up again.
729
00:42:34,084 --> 00:42:35,618
Yeah.
730
00:42:36,086 --> 00:42:37,820
Well, just, uh,
let him know that I called.
731
00:42:37,822 --> 00:42:42,091
And, uh, you know, we have to have
an answer by the end of the week,
732
00:42:42,093 --> 00:42:43,259
or else we're left
with no choice,
733
00:42:43,261 --> 00:42:45,094
we gotta move on down the list.
734
00:42:45,096 --> 00:42:48,631
I know I said that last week,
but I mean it now.
735
00:42:48,633 --> 00:42:49,866
I mean.
736
00:42:49,868 --> 00:42:52,535
Just tell him
I called. Okay?
737
00:42:59,977 --> 00:43:02,946
Really? We have a
symbiotic relationship.
738
00:43:02,948 --> 00:43:04,547
You are a server.
I am a consumer.
739
00:43:04,549 --> 00:43:06,716
If you do not serve,
I cannot consume,
740
00:43:06,718 --> 00:43:09,886
and therefore, you throw
the delicate ecosystem
741
00:43:09,888 --> 00:43:12,088
of our relationship
out of balance.
742
00:43:12,090 --> 00:43:14,557
So another, s'il vous plait
743
00:43:14,559 --> 00:43:16,693
I... I don't got
anymore of that.
744
00:43:16,695 --> 00:43:18,728
Oh, but, did you see this? What?
745
00:43:18,730 --> 00:43:20,930
A petition being circulated
by the YMCA
746
00:43:20,932 --> 00:43:24,734
on bill's behalf, urging
the team to bring him back.
747
00:43:24,736 --> 00:43:25,902
Hmm. Good.
748
00:43:25,904 --> 00:43:28,137
Montreal is a good fall back.
749
00:43:28,139 --> 00:43:30,707
Oh, so, you haven't heard?
Heard what?
750
00:43:30,709 --> 00:43:35,478
Well, word's getting around they
already decided to give him a shot.
751
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:36,613
When?
752
00:43:36,615 --> 00:43:38,147
When hell freezes over.
753
00:43:38,149 --> 00:43:41,217
He's starting and hitting
cleanup.
754
00:43:41,219 --> 00:43:43,286
I'm glad you find this funny.
755
00:43:43,288 --> 00:43:45,154
It's just a man's life
you're talking about.
756
00:43:45,156 --> 00:43:48,658
I'm not naming any names but I'm
telling you this is a reliable source.
757
00:43:48,660 --> 00:43:53,162
People tell you funny things when
you're pouring their gin and tonics.
758
00:43:54,732 --> 00:43:56,666
Montreal's
a non-starter?
759
00:43:56,668 --> 00:44:00,036
It's not just here,
it's all of baseball, man.
760
00:44:00,038 --> 00:44:01,771
Owners talk to each other.
761
00:44:01,773 --> 00:44:04,340
He's 86'd.
He's blackballed.
762
00:44:04,342 --> 00:44:06,342
Call it whatever
the fuck you want.
763
00:44:06,344 --> 00:44:07,577
He's done.
764
00:44:07,579 --> 00:44:08,277
Bullshit!
765
00:44:08,279 --> 00:44:11,314
Bullshit. I mean... Bill's a...
he's a, he's a veteran left-hander.
766
00:44:11,316 --> 00:44:14,117
He's got four or five years
left in his arm.
767
00:44:14,119 --> 00:44:15,952
You got to be kidding me.
768
00:44:15,954 --> 00:44:17,587
I love bill, you know that.
769
00:44:17,589 --> 00:44:18,621
He's one of my best customers.
770
00:44:18,623 --> 00:44:21,290
But you know what,
he's not getting any younger.
771
00:44:21,292 --> 00:44:23,693
He's walked off teams
in two countries,
772
00:44:23,695 --> 00:44:26,095
and he's publicly said
he smokes dope.
773
00:44:26,097 --> 00:44:28,297
Come on. Admit it,
the guy's a real liability.
774
00:44:28,299 --> 00:44:32,101
Whatever bill does off the
field is bill's business.
775
00:44:32,103 --> 00:44:32,535
Nobody else's.
776
00:44:32,537 --> 00:44:35,004
He said in print that the
commissioner would be a rich man
777
00:44:35,006 --> 00:44:37,874
if he fined everyone in
baseball who smoked grass.
778
00:44:37,876 --> 00:44:41,344
You can't say things like that
without suffering consequences.
779
00:44:41,346 --> 00:44:42,445
Well, it's the truth.
780
00:44:42,447 --> 00:44:43,846
Besides, he meant it in jest.
781
00:44:43,848 --> 00:44:44,881
You know bill, he's a joker.
782
00:44:44,883 --> 00:44:47,617
It's like... He's shecky
Greene with a curveball.
783
00:44:47,619 --> 00:44:49,052
Oh, really? Guess what. Yeah.
784
00:44:49,054 --> 00:44:53,322
Owners don't want jokers, they don't
want jokes, they want profits.
785
00:44:53,324 --> 00:44:56,359
Well, he puts asses
in the seats, fans love him.
786
00:44:56,361 --> 00:44:58,461
If you are his friend,
you better tell him
787
00:44:58,463 --> 00:45:01,297
he's got to stop
spinning his wheels.
788
00:45:01,299 --> 00:45:04,167
Oh, I can't do that.
Why not?
789
00:45:06,136 --> 00:45:08,137
It'd break his heart.
790
00:45:08,706 --> 00:45:10,540
Bill Lee was born
to play baseball.
791
00:45:10,542 --> 00:45:13,042
It's what he was meant to do.
792
00:45:14,778 --> 00:45:16,312
It's his identity.
793
00:45:16,314 --> 00:45:19,048
Help him find
a whole new identity.
794
00:45:19,750 --> 00:45:20,883
And soon.
795
00:45:20,885 --> 00:45:24,554
If he hears this from anybody,
he hears it from me. You got it?
796
00:45:24,556 --> 00:45:29,092
Fine. He's all yours.
Just do it, all right?
797
00:45:29,094 --> 00:45:31,327
Stop making those phone calls.
798
00:45:37,502 --> 00:45:39,535
Come in.
799
00:45:44,875 --> 00:45:46,442
Come in!
800
00:45:48,445 --> 00:45:50,913
Oh, Dickie Dennis.
What's up?
801
00:45:50,915 --> 00:45:52,815
Oh, you're in training, I see.
802
00:45:52,817 --> 00:45:55,184
Can I get you something to drink?
You want coffee?
803
00:45:55,186 --> 00:45:56,953
I don't want no coffee.
804
00:45:57,321 --> 00:45:58,888
Something a little stronger?
805
00:45:58,890 --> 00:46:01,290
Well, if you're
gonna have one, sure.
806
00:46:01,292 --> 00:46:02,859
All right.
807
00:46:03,594 --> 00:46:04,761
So what's up?
808
00:46:04,763 --> 00:46:07,930
Ah, just... How's the letter
writing campaign going?
809
00:46:07,932 --> 00:46:10,066
Well, it's going. It's going.
Yeah?
810
00:46:10,068 --> 00:46:14,871
The lack of common courtesy
these days. I swear to god.
811
00:46:16,140 --> 00:46:18,608
Hey, you know the best
thing about being single?
812
00:46:18,610 --> 00:46:19,575
What's that?
813
00:46:19,577 --> 00:46:21,344
You get to...
814
00:46:21,346 --> 00:46:22,945
whenever you want.
815
00:46:23,782 --> 00:46:26,783
Thanks for sharing, man.
816
00:46:27,484 --> 00:46:30,753
Now, I, uh...
817
00:46:30,755 --> 00:46:32,088
You know,
I've been thinking that
818
00:46:32,090 --> 00:46:35,858
we need to start looking
at whole new avenues.
819
00:46:35,860 --> 00:46:37,693
I mean, a fresh start.
820
00:46:37,761 --> 00:46:38,795
I agree.
821
00:46:38,797 --> 00:46:40,897
You do?
Absolutely.
822
00:46:40,899 --> 00:46:41,364
Really?
Yep.
823
00:46:41,366 --> 00:46:45,201
I think it's damn well time we
reach out to the American league.
824
00:46:45,869 --> 00:46:48,237
Oh, that's not
what I had in mind, bill.
825
00:46:48,239 --> 00:46:50,039
Hey, check this out.
826
00:46:50,607 --> 00:46:51,974
So...
827
00:46:52,676 --> 00:46:55,745
The grip I got for my new
slider, you see that?
828
00:46:56,747 --> 00:46:58,080
Yeah?
829
00:46:58,082 --> 00:46:59,248
I want you to keep
this between us,
830
00:46:59,250 --> 00:47:01,884
but I would even consider
a minor league assignment.
831
00:47:01,886 --> 00:47:04,520
Minor leagues? Oh, come on.
Temporarily...
832
00:47:04,522 --> 00:47:06,455
Work my way back up to the show.
No.
833
00:47:06,457 --> 00:47:08,591
I would do whatever it takes.
834
00:47:08,593 --> 00:47:10,193
The spaceman is a big leaguer.
835
00:47:10,195 --> 00:47:14,497
Big leaguers do not play
in the minor leagues.
836
00:47:14,499 --> 00:47:15,631
You don't want to be known as
837
00:47:15,633 --> 00:47:19,302
the guy who doesn't know when
it's time to leave the party.
838
00:47:19,304 --> 00:47:23,272
Yeah, well, I threw nine innings the
other day and it felt pretty good.
839
00:47:24,575 --> 00:47:25,875
For who?
840
00:47:26,076 --> 00:47:27,844
It was, uh...
841
00:47:27,846 --> 00:47:30,379
Senior team over in Longueuil.
842
00:47:30,381 --> 00:47:32,181
Oh, fuck, bill!
843
00:47:32,183 --> 00:47:33,216
Are you serious?
844
00:47:33,218 --> 00:47:34,350
Oh, what's the big deal?
845
00:47:34,352 --> 00:47:36,752
What if the press
finds out about this, huh?
846
00:47:36,754 --> 00:47:40,756
What? So, so what? It's
fucking embarrassing!
847
00:47:41,325 --> 00:47:42,959
What? Maybe not to you.
848
00:47:42,961 --> 00:47:44,961
But it's embarrassing.
It reeks of desperation.
849
00:47:44,963 --> 00:47:49,065
And there's no deodorant in the world
that will hide the smell for desperation.
850
00:47:49,067 --> 00:47:50,166
I don't give a shit about
any of that stuff.
851
00:47:50,168 --> 00:47:54,203
That is for the writers and
historians to worry about, not me.
852
00:47:54,205 --> 00:47:55,605
I just wanna play ball.
853
00:48:02,913 --> 00:48:05,147
Well, this is what I want.
854
00:48:06,049 --> 00:48:07,817
I want to get you in a room
with a tape recorder
855
00:48:07,819 --> 00:48:11,921
and a jigger of vodka and we're
gonna get your stories down.
856
00:48:11,923 --> 00:48:13,856
We're gonna record them.
All of them.
857
00:48:13,858 --> 00:48:18,294
And then I'll write it. You know.
Yeah. Of course, you will.
858
00:48:18,762 --> 00:48:20,963
Well, I'm a writer, god damn it.
859
00:48:23,367 --> 00:48:26,469
It has every element, every
element of a best seller.
860
00:48:26,471 --> 00:48:30,172
We're gonna call it
the wrong stuff.
861
00:48:30,674 --> 00:48:31,474
The wrong stuff?
862
00:48:31,476 --> 00:48:34,877
You see, it's a... It's a takeoff on
that book about the astronauts...
863
00:48:34,879 --> 00:48:37,213
No, no, no. I get it,
the tom Wolfe book.
864
00:48:37,215 --> 00:48:38,848
Okay, listen to this,
865
00:48:38,850 --> 00:48:40,816
I ain't ready to write
my memoirs yet, dick.
866
00:48:40,818 --> 00:48:42,785
I'm ready to pitch.
To keep pitching
867
00:48:42,787 --> 00:48:44,287
because that's what I do
and I do it damn well.
868
00:48:44,289 --> 00:48:48,691
And I'm not desperate. I just want
to share my gift with the world.
869
00:48:48,693 --> 00:48:49,058
Okay?
870
00:48:49,060 --> 00:48:53,062
Now I'm gonna go shower, and
then we're gonna go get a drink.
871
00:48:54,464 --> 00:48:56,532
Well, good. 'Cause I didn't
want to say anything
872
00:48:56,534 --> 00:48:59,502
but the fart was
an improvement on the B.O.
873
00:49:03,407 --> 00:49:06,776
I wasn't just gonna sit
around by the phone anymore.
874
00:49:06,778 --> 00:49:09,345
I needed to get out
and be among the people.
875
00:49:09,347 --> 00:49:10,446
My people.
876
00:49:10,448 --> 00:49:12,448
You know, schmooze.
877
00:49:12,450 --> 00:49:17,453
And when you're a pro athlete, fans
never let you buy your own drinks.
878
00:49:18,155 --> 00:49:18,988
The trade-off
879
00:49:18,990 --> 00:49:22,124
is answering
a hell of a lot of questions.
880
00:49:22,960 --> 00:49:23,793
Bill.
Yeah?
881
00:49:23,795 --> 00:49:25,094
You a, uh, you a religious man?
882
00:49:25,096 --> 00:49:29,832
I'm a Roman catholic
Rastafarian zen Buddhist.
883
00:49:29,834 --> 00:49:34,503
Hey, you hear about the Jewish guy who
converted to Catholicism? Yeah...
884
00:49:34,505 --> 00:49:37,807
He gave up guilt for lent.
885
00:49:37,874 --> 00:49:40,309
Hey, uh, hey, spaceman yeah?
886
00:49:40,311 --> 00:49:40,876
You still get high?
887
00:49:40,878 --> 00:49:44,647
I have always been in favor of
drug testing in sports. Yes.
888
00:49:44,649 --> 00:49:46,349
Really?
Yeah, I like to test them all.
889
00:49:46,351 --> 00:49:49,652
I don't know how
the hell you do it, man.
890
00:49:49,654 --> 00:49:51,620
Everything in moderation.
891
00:49:51,622 --> 00:49:53,356
Including moderation.
892
00:49:55,759 --> 00:49:57,460
Keep it, keep it.
893
00:49:58,695 --> 00:50:00,763
So, what other avenues we got?
894
00:50:00,765 --> 00:50:04,233
Oh, I, uh...
Circling the bases.
895
00:50:04,235 --> 00:50:06,068
Beautiful. What about Detroit?
Yeah.
896
00:50:06,070 --> 00:50:08,304
Um, conference call
with them next week.
897
00:50:08,306 --> 00:50:09,939
What do you think
about California?
898
00:50:09,941 --> 00:50:12,842
I can absolutely deal with
living in socal again.
899
00:50:12,844 --> 00:50:15,111
Can hang out with
my buddies from the eagles.
900
00:50:15,113 --> 00:50:16,479
They've got
great grass out there.
901
00:50:16,481 --> 00:50:18,280
We're gonna get you a place
inside Disneyland.
902
00:50:18,282 --> 00:50:20,282
You can just walk over
to the ball park.
903
00:50:20,284 --> 00:50:23,719
They'll love you there, there'll be
lines all the way out to the gate
904
00:50:23,721 --> 00:50:26,522
for the bill Lee
space mountain man.
905
00:50:27,725 --> 00:50:30,426
Fuck that, man. Fuck that.
Let's not talk about business.
906
00:50:30,428 --> 00:50:34,163
Tonight is a night for a good time,
my friend. A good fucking time.
907
00:50:34,165 --> 00:50:37,566
All right, it works for me. A
body in motion stays in motion.
908
00:50:37,568 --> 00:50:39,702
Basic physics.
Let's circulate.
909
00:50:39,704 --> 00:50:42,405
Party, Einstein, party!
910
00:51:55,245 --> 00:51:56,178
Somehow,
911
00:51:56,180 --> 00:51:59,415
things eventually went
from bad to worse.
912
00:51:59,417 --> 00:52:02,885
I even rented out my basement
to a drug dealer.
913
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:12,761
What? No, no, I'm good.
914
00:52:13,897 --> 00:52:15,664
No, that's rent.
915
00:52:15,666 --> 00:52:20,603
What? For a full month's
room and board? Really?
916
00:52:20,804 --> 00:52:24,306
Yeah and that should
cover utilities.
917
00:52:30,981 --> 00:52:32,848
Thank you, Gustavo.
Got it.
918
00:52:32,850 --> 00:52:34,717
Hey, you got toilet paper?
919
00:52:34,719 --> 00:52:36,352
Yeah, man.
920
00:52:48,465 --> 00:52:52,535
I started partying harder
than ever to numb myself
921
00:52:52,537 --> 00:52:58,407
and there was no shortage of
other degenerates to hang with.
922
00:52:59,142 --> 00:53:00,876
Good morning.
923
00:53:20,864 --> 00:53:22,565
Are you okay?
924
00:53:23,533 --> 00:53:25,000
You okay?
925
00:54:40,110 --> 00:54:44,380
Hey. How's, uh, how's my
favorite mother-in-law?
926
00:54:47,617 --> 00:54:49,385
It's bill.
927
00:54:50,086 --> 00:54:52,221
What does he want?
928
00:54:52,223 --> 00:54:54,156
What is it, bill?
929
00:54:54,158 --> 00:54:54,890
Great news.
930
00:54:54,892 --> 00:54:58,127
I decided that it's time
to start playing ball again.
931
00:54:58,129 --> 00:55:00,763
Hmm. L.A.? You always
loved the climate there.
932
00:55:00,765 --> 00:55:06,702
No, it's actually a senior team just
across the river over in Longueuil.
933
00:55:06,704 --> 00:55:07,603
Long what?
934
00:55:07,605 --> 00:55:10,372
Longueuil.
Just across the river.
935
00:55:10,374 --> 00:55:11,573
Oh. Oh, it's nice over there.
936
00:55:11,575 --> 00:55:14,576
I just didn't realize they had a pro team.
They don't.
937
00:55:14,578 --> 00:55:16,845
It's a goddamn
geriatric league team.
938
00:55:16,847 --> 00:55:19,481
But you know what,
it will help me stay sharp.
939
00:55:19,483 --> 00:55:21,517
Do scouts come to these games?
940
00:55:21,519 --> 00:55:22,418
You never know.
941
00:55:22,420 --> 00:55:25,688
You know, I'm starting
tomorrow night's game,
942
00:55:25,690 --> 00:55:28,524
thought maybe
you could bring the kids by,
943
00:55:28,526 --> 00:55:30,192
watch their old man pitch again.
944
00:55:30,194 --> 00:55:33,462
Oh, I don't know. You know,
they have so much homework.
945
00:55:33,464 --> 00:55:34,797
It's tough during the week...
946
00:55:34,799 --> 00:55:37,299
Well, I can pick 'em up
from school,
947
00:55:37,301 --> 00:55:39,535
and I thought maybe
afterwards...
948
00:55:39,537 --> 00:55:40,969
Maybe you and I could...
949
00:55:40,971 --> 00:55:43,806
I really don't think
it's a good idea, bill.
950
00:55:43,907 --> 00:55:47,076
They're just getting
used to the adjustment.
951
00:55:47,344 --> 00:55:48,444
Maybe next time.
952
00:55:48,446 --> 00:55:49,745
Look, if you really want
to spend more time with them,
953
00:55:49,747 --> 00:55:53,515
Andy's been asking me all week if
you can come to one of his games.
954
00:55:53,517 --> 00:55:54,783
He's pitching now.
955
00:55:54,785 --> 00:55:57,152
They can bring their
homework to the ballpark,
956
00:55:57,154 --> 00:55:58,854
all right, just, please.
957
00:55:58,856 --> 00:56:00,322
Just bring 'em by.
958
00:56:00,324 --> 00:56:02,758
Bill.
Yeah?
959
00:56:02,760 --> 00:56:04,226
Good luck.
960
00:56:08,498 --> 00:56:10,966
Thank god for my
buddies from Longueuil.
961
00:56:10,968 --> 00:56:13,902
Because I probably would have
ended up just like Elvis...
962
00:56:13,904 --> 00:56:15,504
Dead on the can
with my pants down
963
00:56:15,506 --> 00:56:17,506
if they hadn't welcomed
me back to the ball club.
964
00:56:17,508 --> 00:56:22,010
I knew this was a universe away from
even being in the minor leagues.
965
00:56:22,012 --> 00:56:24,613
But at least it was baseball.
966
00:56:24,615 --> 00:56:26,382
Well, sort of.
967
00:56:26,384 --> 00:56:30,252
Hey, hey.
968
00:56:31,688 --> 00:56:34,490
Whoa? Columbian?
969
00:56:34,657 --> 00:56:36,592
Jamaican special blend.
970
00:56:36,760 --> 00:56:38,694
And it ain't coffee.
971
00:56:39,963 --> 00:56:40,629
Is this what I think it is?
972
00:56:40,631 --> 00:56:45,000
Ganja resin straight from
the fields of Kingston, man.
973
00:56:47,937 --> 00:56:49,071
Ooh...
974
00:56:49,073 --> 00:56:51,340
Bullshit.
975
00:56:51,441 --> 00:56:53,175
Only one way to find out.
976
00:56:53,177 --> 00:56:56,345
You crazy, man? We have
a game in 20 minutes.
977
00:56:56,446 --> 00:56:57,880
Perfect.
978
00:56:58,014 --> 00:56:59,114
You're nuts, Lee.
979
00:56:59,116 --> 00:57:01,216
Well, that very well
may be true, king.
980
00:57:01,218 --> 00:57:03,719
Hey, you ever studied the Bible?
981
00:57:04,421 --> 00:57:05,020
Maybe.
982
00:57:05,022 --> 00:57:07,456
Well, it says that
on the sixth day
983
00:57:07,458 --> 00:57:09,124
god created women, right?
984
00:57:09,192 --> 00:57:09,658
Okay.
985
00:57:09,660 --> 00:57:12,227
But on the seventh day,
he didn't rest.
986
00:57:12,229 --> 00:57:14,496
He gave us this
wonderful game of baseball.
987
00:57:14,498 --> 00:57:18,300
That's why there were so many
doubleheaders on Sundays, as a tribute.
988
00:57:18,302 --> 00:57:22,671
But today, he gave us this
big old coffee can of ganja.
989
00:57:23,441 --> 00:57:25,407
Man, I haven't gotten high
since college.
990
00:57:25,409 --> 00:57:27,342
Shit makes me paranoid.
991
00:57:27,344 --> 00:57:28,744
Come on, Joe.
992
00:57:28,746 --> 00:57:31,013
Who are we even playing today?
993
00:57:31,181 --> 00:57:32,481
Sorel, they suck.
994
00:57:32,483 --> 00:57:33,882
So do we.
995
00:57:33,884 --> 00:57:35,284
Right.
996
00:57:35,685 --> 00:57:37,286
Hey, guys.
997
00:57:37,954 --> 00:57:40,756
Come on, seriously, come on.
998
00:57:40,758 --> 00:57:42,758
We have to loosen up.
999
00:57:43,359 --> 00:57:45,360
It's depressing out there!
1000
00:57:45,362 --> 00:57:49,097
Thinking is like death, okay?
1001
00:57:49,199 --> 00:57:51,700
They call it "playing
the game" for a reason.
1002
00:57:51,702 --> 00:57:54,136
And we've all been played
this game since we were kids.
1003
00:57:54,138 --> 00:57:55,637
That's a long, long time,
1004
00:57:55,639 --> 00:57:56,371
especially for Larry over there.
1005
00:57:56,373 --> 00:58:00,409
Babe Ruth was Larry's bat boy,
that's how old Larry is.
1006
00:58:00,411 --> 00:58:02,144
And we all know
how to play this game.
1007
00:58:02,146 --> 00:58:05,180
Okay, maybe some of us play a
little bit better than others,
1008
00:58:05,182 --> 00:58:06,181
sorry Claude.
1009
00:58:06,183 --> 00:58:08,884
But it's just muscle memory,
that's all.
1010
00:58:09,352 --> 00:58:10,586
Just muscle memory.
1011
00:58:10,588 --> 00:58:14,156
What we're really looking
for here is freedom.
1012
00:58:14,324 --> 00:58:15,557
Isn't that why
we play this game?
1013
00:58:15,559 --> 00:58:19,728
To run out to that emerald
green field and just be free?
1014
00:58:19,730 --> 00:58:20,729
Hell, yeah!
1015
00:58:20,731 --> 00:58:21,263
Look, Joe over here
1016
00:58:21,265 --> 00:58:24,199
just wants to be free of his
naggy-ass wife for a few hours.
1017
00:58:24,201 --> 00:58:25,634
Isn't that right, Joe?
1018
00:58:25,636 --> 00:58:26,401
Pretty much.
1019
00:58:26,403 --> 00:58:29,371
Well, we're all looking
for freedom, boys.
1020
00:58:29,706 --> 00:58:32,307
Even if it's from our own minds.
1021
00:58:32,876 --> 00:58:35,110
Oh, yes. We do.
1022
00:58:35,712 --> 00:58:37,279
Today, boys,
1023
00:58:37,281 --> 00:58:40,315
we are going to free our
minds from our bodies
1024
00:58:40,317 --> 00:58:42,985
and let our instincts take over!
1025
00:58:43,186 --> 00:58:44,620
Today,
1026
00:58:45,755 --> 00:58:48,957
we are gonna pass the proverbial
peace pipe from man to man
1027
00:58:48,959 --> 00:58:52,461
and go out there, without
fear, into the sunshine
1028
00:58:52,463 --> 00:58:54,463
and just be free!
1029
00:58:54,465 --> 00:58:55,597
Now who's with me?
1030
00:58:57,934 --> 00:58:59,301
I'm gonna step into this office
1031
00:58:59,303 --> 00:59:00,903
and I'm gonna hot-box
that motherfucker.
1032
00:59:00,905 --> 00:59:04,373
Now, get in there.
Get in there! Get in there!
1033
00:59:04,375 --> 00:59:07,543
Come on, Joe.
Come on, Larry.
1034
00:59:10,280 --> 00:59:11,780
All right.
1035
00:59:13,783 --> 00:59:17,986
At the plate that day, I went seven
for eight with three home runs.
1036
00:59:17,988 --> 00:59:21,189
Every pitch thrown to me,
no matter how fast,
1037
00:59:21,191 --> 00:59:24,626
arrived at the plate like
a gentle little leaf.
1038
00:59:24,628 --> 00:59:28,163
I could literally count
the seams on the ball.
1039
00:59:28,165 --> 00:59:31,099
All I had to do was
catch it on the end of the bat
1040
00:59:31,101 --> 00:59:34,369
and serve it back
to the universe.
1041
00:59:34,771 --> 00:59:37,039
And in the outfield?
1042
00:59:37,240 --> 00:59:39,775
I felt no urgency whatsoever.
1043
00:59:39,876 --> 00:59:41,410
Take your time, Billy.
1044
00:59:41,412 --> 00:59:45,380
I'll wait for you to get
under me, my friend.
1045
00:59:45,715 --> 00:59:46,214
I love you.
1046
00:59:46,216 --> 00:59:50,218
But on the mound, that is
where I channeled the light.
1047
00:59:50,220 --> 00:59:55,223
I combined the sacrifice of Jesus
with the Patience of Buddha.
1048
00:59:55,225 --> 00:59:57,993
And then mixed in
the control of Sandy Koufax
1049
00:59:57,995 --> 01:00:00,696
just to get a little
Judaism in there.
1050
01:00:01,297 --> 01:00:04,600
I was Vishnu in
a polyester v-neck.
1051
01:00:04,602 --> 01:00:07,936
The batters tried to guess what
pitch I was thinking of throwing,
1052
01:00:07,938 --> 01:00:12,074
but they couldn't because
I'd ceased thought entirely.
1053
01:00:12,076 --> 01:00:16,511
With the magic beans keeping us
loose but percolating all season,
1054
01:00:16,513 --> 01:00:18,814
I'd led Longueuil
straight to the playoffs.
1055
01:00:18,816 --> 01:00:22,384
Forget about the chartered flights
and chauffeured team buses.
1056
01:00:22,386 --> 01:00:25,887
We drove ourselves to the games.
1057
01:00:25,989 --> 01:00:28,724
We played until it got too cold.
1058
01:00:28,726 --> 01:00:30,425
And then we played a bit more.
1059
01:00:30,427 --> 01:00:33,762
Of all the teams I'd been on,
this was...
1060
01:00:33,764 --> 01:00:34,863
Well, this was one of 'em.
1061
01:00:34,865 --> 01:00:39,034
And every game, I'd just hope
that my family would show up
1062
01:00:39,036 --> 01:00:42,004
even just once to watch me play.
1063
01:00:42,805 --> 01:00:47,809
Turns out that if I wanted to spend
quality time with my wife again
1064
01:00:47,811 --> 01:00:49,678
it would have to be in court.
1065
01:00:49,680 --> 01:00:53,582
Uh, Mr. Lee, despite the entertainment
value of your arguments,
1066
01:00:53,584 --> 01:00:58,186
this court hereby awards Mrs. Lee
full custody of the children.
1067
01:00:58,454 --> 01:01:00,155
What?
1068
01:01:00,157 --> 01:01:00,622
Full custody? Why?
1069
01:01:00,624 --> 01:01:04,860
Given the fact that you have rented your
basement to a known narcotics dealer...
1070
01:01:04,862 --> 01:01:07,529
this court herby forbids
any and all visitation
1071
01:01:07,531 --> 01:01:11,800
pending a visit from family
and children's services.
1072
01:01:11,802 --> 01:01:12,467
No visitation?
1073
01:01:12,469 --> 01:01:17,839
This court also awards Mrs. Lee the
duplex in Belmont, Massachusetts.
1074
01:01:17,841 --> 01:01:22,077
- The house in Bellingham, Washington.
- Jesus Christ!
1075
01:01:22,946 --> 01:01:25,414
Settle yourself, Mr. Lee.
1076
01:01:25,548 --> 01:01:28,784
We also awarded
Mrs. Lee the Jeep...
1077
01:01:29,153 --> 01:01:32,421
the BMW, all the furniture...
Yep. Sounds about right.
1078
01:01:32,423 --> 01:01:36,425
And the $150,000 remaining
in the joint bank account.
1079
01:01:36,427 --> 01:01:41,496
Great! Why don't you
just go ahead and take it all.
1080
01:01:43,566 --> 01:01:46,702
To Mr. Lee, we award
1081
01:01:46,704 --> 01:01:49,638
the Volkswagen Van with pop top.
1082
01:01:50,206 --> 01:01:52,307
It's a bus, not a Van.
1083
01:01:53,042 --> 01:01:56,712
The rifle collection,
the Salvador Dali paintings,
1084
01:01:56,714 --> 01:01:59,081
and the remaining
subscriptions to
1085
01:01:59,083 --> 01:02:03,085
field and stream
and weed magazine.
1086
01:02:03,087 --> 01:02:05,387
High times magazine.
1087
01:02:06,055 --> 01:02:07,522
Then we are finished here.
1088
01:02:07,524 --> 01:02:12,227
Wait, can you please tell me what
I need to do to see my kids?
1089
01:02:12,328 --> 01:02:13,762
Mr. Lee, we're done.
1090
01:02:13,764 --> 01:02:14,830
No, I'm not going anywhere
1091
01:02:14,832 --> 01:02:18,834
until you tell me what I
need to do to see my kids.
1092
01:02:18,968 --> 01:02:22,804
For starters, you need to rid
your house of criminals.
1093
01:02:22,806 --> 01:02:25,207
And you need to
find gainful employment.
1094
01:02:25,209 --> 01:02:26,575
Look I'm trying.
1095
01:02:27,010 --> 01:02:30,912
I've written letters to every goddamn
major league baseball team out there.
1096
01:02:31,147 --> 01:02:32,047
Mr. Lee.
1097
01:02:32,049 --> 01:02:36,051
You know, perhaps it's time for
you to find a new profession.
1098
01:02:38,387 --> 01:02:40,789
Thank you.
We're done.
1099
01:02:44,460 --> 01:02:46,228
Thank you, your honor.
1100
01:02:46,295 --> 01:02:48,663
Will you get
the next group ready?
1101
01:02:48,665 --> 01:02:51,166
No visitation, really?
1102
01:03:01,110 --> 01:03:02,377
I'm sorry.
1103
01:03:10,287 --> 01:03:13,855
All right, how about some guys, who
can actually hit and throw and catch?
1104
01:03:13,857 --> 01:03:17,292
Real baseball players.
Not just your friends.
1105
01:03:20,663 --> 01:03:22,264
Ooh, ooh, what about
Jimmy Lemond?
1106
01:03:22,266 --> 01:03:25,100
Mmm-mmm. No,
he works nights.
1107
01:03:25,768 --> 01:03:27,936
Uh, Louis Petit?
1108
01:03:27,938 --> 01:03:31,072
No, he, uh, bowling league.
1109
01:03:31,307 --> 01:03:32,808
Bowling?
Yep.
1110
01:03:33,075 --> 01:03:35,010
Bill, any suggestions?
1111
01:03:35,012 --> 01:03:36,745
Uh, I know Mike Schmidt.
1112
01:03:36,747 --> 01:03:40,949
Oh, he's your friend. You
think he may play with us?
1113
01:03:41,250 --> 01:03:42,284
No.
1114
01:03:46,389 --> 01:03:50,492
Uh, no.
No, thank you. Uh...
1115
01:03:50,593 --> 01:03:52,494
Yeah. Yeah.
1116
01:03:55,998 --> 01:03:57,432
Bill?
1117
01:03:59,035 --> 01:04:01,002
I got news!
All right.
1118
01:04:01,004 --> 01:04:02,571
Another round on me.
1119
01:04:03,372 --> 01:04:06,474
What is it, dick? Hey, you
comin' to the game on Sunday?
1120
01:04:06,476 --> 01:04:08,176
Uh, not likely.
1121
01:04:08,178 --> 01:04:13,815
I think that we may have found the proverbial
needle in the haystack, my friend.
1122
01:04:13,817 --> 01:04:16,618
Just got off the phone with
my buddy from San Francisco.
1123
01:04:16,620 --> 01:04:17,152
He owes me a favor.
1124
01:04:17,154 --> 01:04:25,026
And I have gotten you a tryout with San Fran
at their spring training facility in Phoenix.
1125
01:04:25,728 --> 01:04:26,027
When?
1126
01:04:26,029 --> 01:04:29,798
Uh, this Friday. There's
flights through New York.
1127
01:04:29,899 --> 01:04:31,333
Uh...
We've got a huge game
1128
01:04:31,335 --> 01:04:33,435
against new Brunswick on Sunday.
1129
01:04:33,437 --> 01:04:36,571
You got a huge game
against new Brunswick?
1130
01:04:36,772 --> 01:04:38,006
Yeah.
That's an oxymoron, bill.
1131
01:04:38,008 --> 01:04:42,177
There is no such thing as a
huge game against Brunswick.
1132
01:04:43,112 --> 01:04:43,879
Our prayers have been answered
1133
01:04:43,881 --> 01:04:46,114
and quite frankly I didn't think
there was a zero chance in hell
1134
01:04:46,116 --> 01:04:48,884
of it ever happening,
but it has happened.
1135
01:04:48,886 --> 01:04:50,719
And now, you're gonna pass it up
1136
01:04:50,721 --> 01:04:52,387
because you got
a beer league game
1137
01:04:52,389 --> 01:04:55,156
with this bunch of drunk jokers.
1138
01:04:55,158 --> 01:04:56,524
I guess you make
a pretty good point.
1139
01:04:56,526 --> 01:04:57,893
Damn right, I make a good point.
1140
01:04:57,895 --> 01:05:01,029
You can't replace
pine tar with fixodent.
1141
01:05:01,197 --> 01:05:02,931
And you need to get packing.
1142
01:05:04,400 --> 01:05:05,133
All right.
1143
01:05:05,135 --> 01:05:07,869
Well, I better hit the road.
Nice work.
1144
01:05:09,405 --> 01:05:12,474
Hey, guys, I better get going.
1145
01:05:12,909 --> 01:05:15,477
Okay, I'll see you on Sunday.
Done?
1146
01:05:15,878 --> 01:05:18,713
Yeah, I'm not gonna be
able to play on Sunday.
1147
01:05:19,615 --> 01:05:19,948
What?
1148
01:05:19,950 --> 01:05:22,050
I gotta get in the bus
and head out to Arizona.
1149
01:05:22,052 --> 01:05:24,219
I got a tryout
with San Francisco.
1150
01:05:24,520 --> 01:05:26,254
Dick over here just set it up.
1151
01:05:27,623 --> 01:05:29,624
Oh, that's great.
1152
01:05:29,626 --> 01:05:32,827
Wait a minute. What about all the
crap you've been feeding us about
1153
01:05:32,829 --> 01:05:33,395
all the glitz and greed
1154
01:05:33,397 --> 01:05:36,231
and disloyalty at the major league level.
I know. I know.
1155
01:05:36,233 --> 01:05:38,833
That was just me
bullshitting me.
1156
01:05:39,302 --> 01:05:40,201
If I don't leave this town soon
1157
01:05:40,203 --> 01:05:43,705
I'm gonna end up bankrupt or dead.
Probably both.
1158
01:05:43,707 --> 01:05:44,539
He's going to go.
1159
01:05:44,541 --> 01:05:48,209
Well, man, do what you gotta do.
1160
01:05:48,811 --> 01:05:53,248
Hey, I love each and every one of you
guys like brothers. I mean that.
1161
01:05:53,816 --> 01:05:55,250
Okay?
1162
01:05:55,252 --> 01:05:55,884
I'll see you around.
1163
01:05:55,886 --> 01:05:58,653
I'll leave you tickets at
will call in San Francisco.
1164
01:05:58,655 --> 01:06:00,689
Hey, what about your tab?
1165
01:06:00,691 --> 01:06:02,190
Oh, yeah!
1166
01:06:02,425 --> 01:06:03,625
"Oh, yeah"?
1167
01:06:03,627 --> 01:06:06,561
"Oh, yeah," what?
Okay, you're on.
1168
01:06:06,563 --> 01:06:08,997
I'm puttin' him on you.
But I'm not payin' his tab.
1169
01:06:08,999 --> 01:06:11,399
Yes you are. Somebody is.
The hell no.
1170
01:06:11,401 --> 01:06:11,833
Nah.
Sucker!
1171
01:06:11,835 --> 01:06:15,370
You guys have been sitting here all day.
Someone's gotta pay it.
1172
01:07:49,932 --> 01:07:50,765
Hey, boys.
Hey.
1173
01:07:50,767 --> 01:07:51,699
Bill Lee.
Good to see you.
1174
01:07:51,701 --> 01:07:54,069
How you doin'? I'll see you in there.
Good, man.
1175
01:07:54,071 --> 01:07:56,037
For sure.
All right.
1176
01:08:04,480 --> 01:08:05,313
Bill Lee?
1177
01:08:05,315 --> 01:08:06,748
Hey, Bruce Lindsay.
How are you?
1178
01:08:06,750 --> 01:08:10,085
What in the holy fuck
are you doing here?
1179
01:08:10,087 --> 01:08:12,754
I was told that I could try out.
By who?
1180
01:08:13,823 --> 01:08:14,989
My agent.
1181
01:08:14,991 --> 01:08:17,258
He said that he spoke
to the owner himself.
1182
01:08:17,260 --> 01:08:20,228
I didn't know retired
ballplayers had agents.
1183
01:08:21,030 --> 01:08:22,130
I ain't retired.
1184
01:08:22,132 --> 01:08:25,233
Okay? And I just drove here all
the goddamn way from Quebec.
1185
01:08:25,235 --> 01:08:27,335
Now, are you gonna
let me throw or not?
1186
01:08:27,337 --> 01:08:29,204
You serious? You drove
here from Quebec?
1187
01:08:29,206 --> 01:08:30,305
Yep.
Why didn't you fly?
1188
01:08:30,307 --> 01:08:32,607
Because I enjoy the open road.
1189
01:08:32,609 --> 01:08:35,376
The wind in my hair.
Stones on the radio.
1190
01:08:35,711 --> 01:08:36,978
And I'm broke.
1191
01:08:36,980 --> 01:08:39,247
You are some piece of work, Lee.
1192
01:08:40,349 --> 01:08:41,683
All right, I'll tell you what.
1193
01:08:41,685 --> 01:08:45,120
I'll let you throw batting practice
today to the college kids.
1194
01:08:45,354 --> 01:08:46,754
Batting practice?
1195
01:08:47,923 --> 01:08:51,893
Bruce, I don't need your
goddamn pity party. All right?
1196
01:08:51,895 --> 01:08:53,828
I do feel sorry for you, but...
1197
01:08:53,830 --> 01:08:54,863
You throw BP for a few days,
1198
01:08:54,865 --> 01:08:57,866
keep your nose clean and
we'll see what we can do.
1199
01:08:57,868 --> 01:09:00,268
Besides, this benefits us both.
1200
01:09:00,369 --> 01:09:03,138
Hitting off you will be
good for their confidence.
1201
01:09:05,975 --> 01:09:08,176
Can I at least get in uniform?
1202
01:09:09,044 --> 01:09:11,846
No, you're good.
1203
01:09:19,855 --> 01:09:21,956
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
1204
01:09:21,958 --> 01:09:22,557
God, man!
1205
01:09:22,559 --> 01:09:27,629
Shit, who is that?
That is Manny moss.
1206
01:09:28,330 --> 01:09:29,564
Ooh!
1207
01:09:29,566 --> 01:09:32,433
Whoo! Yeah!
What's my name, huh?
1208
01:09:32,435 --> 01:09:34,569
I think it's probably
"douchebag."
1209
01:09:34,737 --> 01:09:36,571
Maury moss' kid.
1210
01:09:36,573 --> 01:09:39,440
Sweetest goddamn
swing I've ever seen.
1211
01:09:39,442 --> 01:09:43,044
His attitude's got
as much bite as his bat.
1212
01:09:43,379 --> 01:09:45,079
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
1213
01:09:46,216 --> 01:09:48,683
Goodness! Oh, my god!
1214
01:09:48,685 --> 01:09:50,385
Let me at him.
1215
01:09:51,887 --> 01:09:53,755
It's batting practice, bill.
I know.
1216
01:09:53,757 --> 01:09:55,957
Just batting practice.
Come on.
1217
01:09:55,959 --> 01:09:56,658
All right.
1218
01:09:56,660 --> 01:10:00,395
Go get him.
Jim! Come on out.
1219
01:10:28,624 --> 01:10:30,325
Whoo-hee!
1220
01:10:30,860 --> 01:10:34,295
Yeah! Yeah! Get out the
tape measures, baby!
1221
01:10:34,297 --> 01:10:37,465
Manny's putting on
a clinic today. Yeah.
1222
01:10:40,869 --> 01:10:41,769
Oh. Hey!
1223
01:10:41,771 --> 01:10:44,572
This is supposed to
be BP, old man river.
1224
01:10:44,574 --> 01:10:46,574
You wouldn't want to be
responsible for an injury
1225
01:10:46,576 --> 01:10:48,710
to a future hall of famer,
would you now?
1226
01:10:48,712 --> 01:10:50,044
Look, look, look.
Just do your job
1227
01:10:50,046 --> 01:10:51,246
and lay it in there
nice and easy.
1228
01:10:51,248 --> 01:10:53,715
Like a sweet kiss from
your old lady, huh?
1229
01:10:53,717 --> 01:10:55,883
Your old lady.
1230
01:10:56,418 --> 01:10:59,320
I ain't here to play
Patty cake, kiddo.
1231
01:11:13,902 --> 01:11:16,671
Go! Hey, who the
fuck is this guy?
1232
01:11:16,673 --> 01:11:18,539
Okay, you want to
play like that?
1233
01:11:18,541 --> 01:11:20,441
Let's see what you've got.
1234
01:11:27,017 --> 01:11:28,716
That was nasty.
1235
01:11:31,955 --> 01:11:34,255
What the fuck, man?
Fuck, man.
1236
01:11:34,257 --> 01:11:36,090
Whoa, easy.
1237
01:11:36,092 --> 01:11:38,526
What is this, man? Y'all trying
to get me hurt out here?
1238
01:11:38,528 --> 01:11:40,361
I'm about to pull a muscle!
1239
01:11:42,731 --> 01:11:44,399
What's he doin'?
1240
01:11:45,000 --> 01:11:46,868
What he knows how to do.
1241
01:11:48,003 --> 01:11:49,437
Compete.
1242
01:11:49,505 --> 01:11:51,406
Get him out of there.
1243
01:11:53,310 --> 01:11:55,009
What kind of stuff is this?
1244
01:11:55,011 --> 01:11:57,578
Supposed to be
spring training BP!
1245
01:12:00,149 --> 01:12:00,715
What the fuck was that?
1246
01:12:00,717 --> 01:12:02,450
Oh, come on,
what do you want me to do?
1247
01:12:02,452 --> 01:12:04,752
Just lay'em up there for him?
Yes.
1248
01:12:04,754 --> 01:12:06,354
It's batting practice.
1249
01:12:06,356 --> 01:12:08,289
I can't have you comin' in here
1250
01:12:08,291 --> 01:12:09,757
and throwin' off
a young sluggers timing
1251
01:12:09,759 --> 01:12:12,026
with your grab bag of
monkey shit pitches, Lee!
1252
01:12:12,028 --> 01:12:13,094
Look, I'm sorry, all right.
I just wanted to
1253
01:12:13,096 --> 01:12:15,330
show you guys what
I still got in the tank.
1254
01:12:15,332 --> 01:12:16,464
How about next time
I just serve them up
1255
01:12:16,466 --> 01:12:18,433
like little Twinkies
on silver platters for you?
1256
01:12:18,435 --> 01:12:20,401
Oh, there's not gonna
be any next time.
1257
01:12:20,403 --> 01:12:22,537
We're committed to
a youth movement here.
1258
01:12:22,539 --> 01:12:24,605
So, uh, good luck, all of that.
1259
01:12:24,607 --> 01:12:26,641
I'm sorry you wasted your time.
1260
01:12:26,643 --> 01:12:29,644
If anything changes,
we'll let you know.
1261
01:12:30,846 --> 01:12:32,747
Yeah. Why don't you go...
1262
01:12:32,749 --> 01:12:34,916
No need to make a scene.
1263
01:12:34,918 --> 01:12:35,683
It's just business.
1264
01:12:35,685 --> 01:12:37,585
Uh-huh.
It's just business.
1265
01:12:37,587 --> 01:12:38,753
Where have I heard that before?
1266
01:12:38,755 --> 01:12:40,888
How do you feel about
the fact that we're about to
1267
01:12:40,890 --> 01:12:44,192
replace your insubordinate
over-the-hill ass...
1268
01:12:44,194 --> 01:12:46,127
immediately from your contract.
1269
01:12:46,129 --> 01:12:47,261
This is a business, Lee!
1270
01:12:47,263 --> 01:12:49,597
Plain and simple,
it's a business!
1271
01:12:51,534 --> 01:12:54,435
Fuckin' assholes!
1272
01:12:54,437 --> 01:12:54,836
Guess what?
1273
01:12:54,838 --> 01:13:01,075
Mr. Lee, you know, perhaps it's time
for you to find a new profession.
1274
01:13:11,220 --> 01:13:14,255
Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey!
1275
01:13:14,556 --> 01:13:18,059
Sorry
about that, bill. Listen.
1276
01:13:18,727 --> 01:13:20,461
I respect your tenacity.
1277
01:13:20,463 --> 01:13:21,195
More of us do than you know.
1278
01:13:21,197 --> 01:13:24,732
We all know you play the
game for the right reasons.
1279
01:13:24,800 --> 01:13:29,303
Hey, you won 119
major league games.
1280
01:13:29,305 --> 01:13:31,773
I don't know whose daughter
you humped up in Montreal,
1281
01:13:31,775 --> 01:13:34,776
but somebody's got it
out for you big time.
1282
01:13:34,778 --> 01:13:38,846
Who does? Who doesn't
is the question.
1283
01:13:38,848 --> 01:13:42,750
You've been banned from the big
leagues, kid. Plain and simple.
1284
01:13:44,187 --> 01:13:45,887
Hey, you didn't hear it from me,
1285
01:13:45,889 --> 01:13:49,690
but Cleveland's looking for a minor
league pitching coach down in Tucson.
1286
01:13:49,692 --> 01:13:53,461
I told them you might show up
for an interview tomorrow.
1287
01:13:54,496 --> 01:13:56,230
A coaching job?
1288
01:13:56,465 --> 01:13:57,632
No, man, I don't want to coach.
1289
01:13:57,634 --> 01:13:59,400
I want to pitch.
I'm a pitcher.
1290
01:13:59,402 --> 01:14:01,969
- It's not gonna happen.
- That's life.
1291
01:14:01,971 --> 01:14:03,638
You know the game.
1292
01:14:03,739 --> 01:14:06,841
Go make a steady paycheck.
Teach what you know.
1293
01:14:09,011 --> 01:14:11,179
I appreciate the information.
1294
01:14:11,313 --> 01:14:13,581
You're one of
the good ones, Marv.
1295
01:14:13,583 --> 01:14:15,483
Thank you.
Okay.
1296
01:14:17,620 --> 01:14:18,853
Keep fighting the good fight.
1297
01:14:18,855 --> 01:14:20,388
All right, take care.
1298
01:15:39,234 --> 01:15:40,434
Hello.
1299
01:15:40,436 --> 01:15:41,536
Hey, honey.
1300
01:15:41,538 --> 01:15:43,704
What time is it?
Where are you?
1301
01:15:43,972 --> 01:15:45,306
I'm in Arizona.
1302
01:15:45,308 --> 01:15:48,109
Had a tryout with
San Francisco today.
1303
01:15:48,111 --> 01:15:49,944
Arizona? You did?
1304
01:15:49,946 --> 01:15:51,579
Well, that's great.
1305
01:15:52,080 --> 01:15:52,713
How did it go?
1306
01:15:52,715 --> 01:15:54,415
Well, I thought that
I did great but, uh,
1307
01:15:54,417 --> 01:15:59,053
apparently, they are committed to a youth
movement, whatever the hell that means.
1308
01:15:59,055 --> 01:16:00,388
How long are you gone?
1309
01:16:00,390 --> 01:16:01,322
I'm gonna be a while.
1310
01:16:01,324 --> 01:16:03,124
I got a lead on
something in Tucson.
1311
01:16:03,126 --> 01:16:06,227
Look, uh, can I please
speak to the kids?
1312
01:16:06,229 --> 01:16:08,996
They're all sleeping.
It's late here.
1313
01:16:09,264 --> 01:16:11,065
Call tomorrow. Okay?
1314
01:16:13,602 --> 01:16:16,170
Can I ask you
an honest question?
1315
01:16:16,572 --> 01:16:18,005
Of course.
1316
01:16:18,473 --> 01:16:20,141
Do you still love me?
1317
01:16:23,078 --> 01:16:24,612
Bill...
1318
01:16:26,748 --> 01:16:30,785
What is it? Because I'm not in
the majors anymore, is that it?
1319
01:16:30,787 --> 01:16:32,753
Is that really what you think?
1320
01:16:32,755 --> 01:16:34,021
I don't know.
Why don't you tell me?
1321
01:16:34,023 --> 01:16:36,591
I love you enough
to tell you the truth.
1322
01:16:36,593 --> 01:16:38,326
It'd be nice if you would
stick up for your kids
1323
01:16:38,328 --> 01:16:42,563
the way you stick up for your
team mates all the time.
1324
01:16:54,610 --> 01:16:56,410
Well, what about you?
1325
01:16:56,612 --> 01:16:57,511
What about us?
1326
01:16:57,513 --> 01:16:59,046
I'm not sure that things can be
1327
01:16:59,048 --> 01:17:01,816
salvaged between us
at this point.
1328
01:17:01,883 --> 01:17:03,651
But we can be friends.
1329
01:17:05,654 --> 01:17:07,622
The kids need that too.
1330
01:17:09,224 --> 01:17:11,225
But they need you here.
1331
01:17:11,460 --> 01:17:15,763
You've been on
the road for 14 years.
1332
01:17:15,765 --> 01:17:17,999
It's time to come home.
1333
01:17:19,401 --> 01:17:21,302
I'm going to bed.
1334
01:17:21,304 --> 01:17:22,737
Wait, wait, wait.
1335
01:17:23,238 --> 01:17:24,739
Good night.
1336
01:17:24,741 --> 01:17:26,440
Call them tomorrow.
1337
01:17:28,644 --> 01:17:30,344
Call...
1338
01:17:55,570 --> 01:17:59,540
You know the most frustrating
thing about ex-wives.
1339
01:18:03,513 --> 01:18:07,048
Sometimes they're
friggin' right.
1340
01:19:23,892 --> 01:19:25,626
Howdy, neighbors!
1341
01:19:26,461 --> 01:19:30,731
Passport? Vehicle registration?
Uh, right.
1342
01:19:30,733 --> 01:19:32,500
Let's see.
1343
01:19:35,971 --> 01:19:37,338
I could've sworn
I brought the darn thing.
1344
01:19:37,340 --> 01:19:40,241
They didn't ask for it on the us
side when I was coming through.
1345
01:19:40,243 --> 01:19:43,677
I thought Canadians were supposed
to be the friendly ones, eh?
1346
01:19:44,247 --> 01:19:49,283
If you don't have a passport or any ID,
you're gonna need to step out of the car.
1347
01:19:49,417 --> 01:19:51,385
Uh...
1348
01:19:51,387 --> 01:19:54,121
What have we got here?
He smelled something.
1349
01:19:54,123 --> 01:19:57,725
We can work this out.
I'm late for a baseball game.
1350
01:19:57,727 --> 01:19:59,560
Name's Lee. Bill Lee.
1351
01:19:59,795 --> 01:20:01,362
I'm a ball player.
1352
01:20:01,830 --> 01:20:04,865
I don't care if you're late
for your fuckin' wedding.
1353
01:20:04,933 --> 01:20:06,967
Get out of the car, now.
1354
01:20:07,602 --> 01:20:09,336
What have we got?
1355
01:20:09,338 --> 01:20:12,573
This guy's got no ID.
1356
01:20:12,774 --> 01:20:14,275
He says he's
a professional athlete.
1357
01:20:14,277 --> 01:20:17,645
Wants some special treatment.
And then there's this.
1358
01:20:20,382 --> 01:20:21,615
Really?
1359
01:20:21,617 --> 01:20:23,717
What hockey team you play for?
1360
01:20:23,719 --> 01:20:25,486
I'm a baseball player.
1361
01:20:25,587 --> 01:20:26,554
Oh.
1362
01:20:26,556 --> 01:20:30,457
Well, then you gotta
step out of the vehicle.
1363
01:20:30,859 --> 01:20:34,662
I wasn't looking for any
special treatment, fellas.
1364
01:20:34,664 --> 01:20:35,396
I'm just a friendly American.
1365
01:20:35,398 --> 01:20:40,167
Hell, if it were up to me there wouldn't be
any borders between these two countries.
1366
01:20:40,535 --> 01:20:42,403
Save the stump speech.
1367
01:20:44,272 --> 01:20:45,773
Wait a second.
1368
01:20:45,775 --> 01:20:47,875
Are you the spaceman, bill Lee?
1369
01:20:47,877 --> 01:20:48,642
Yes, sir.
1370
01:20:48,644 --> 01:20:52,079
William Francis ii.
Pleasure to meet you boys.
1371
01:20:52,581 --> 01:20:54,548
I saw you in high times.
1372
01:20:54,916 --> 01:20:57,117
Um... not that I read it.
1373
01:20:57,119 --> 01:20:57,751
Well...
1374
01:20:57,753 --> 01:21:00,654
But, man... boy, Montreal
fucked you proper, bill. Yeah.
1375
01:21:00,656 --> 01:21:04,692
You've got brass balls standing up
for little Rodney Scott like that.
1376
01:21:04,694 --> 01:21:06,026
Yeah.
Well.
1377
01:21:06,028 --> 01:21:06,694
Where you going?
1378
01:21:06,696 --> 01:21:09,330
Well, I've, uh, I've
actually been playing with
1379
01:21:09,332 --> 01:21:11,265
a great group of guys
over in Longueuil.
1380
01:21:11,267 --> 01:21:15,436
You know, I left them behind to
go try out for San Francisco,
1381
01:21:15,438 --> 01:21:17,004
which was a big fuckin' mistake.
1382
01:21:17,006 --> 01:21:18,339
Anyway, they got a game tonight
1383
01:21:18,341 --> 01:21:20,474
against a bunch of ugly
plumbers from new Brunswick,
1384
01:21:20,476 --> 01:21:22,443
and I'm just trying to
get back so I can pitch.
1385
01:21:22,445 --> 01:21:25,779
What the heck you playing
for Longueuil for?
1386
01:21:25,781 --> 01:21:26,447
They need me.
1387
01:21:26,449 --> 01:21:29,650
You heard the man. He's
got a ball game to pitch.
1388
01:21:29,652 --> 01:21:31,352
Go on. Get out of here.
1389
01:21:31,586 --> 01:21:33,387
All right. I'll just...
1390
01:21:33,555 --> 01:21:35,155
I'm gonna hang on
to the coffee, though.
1391
01:21:35,157 --> 01:21:37,191
Smells like pretty good shit.
1392
01:21:37,359 --> 01:21:38,792
Take care.
1393
01:21:38,794 --> 01:21:40,661
Go ahead. Go on.
1394
01:21:40,795 --> 01:21:42,796
Okay. Yeah, of course.
1395
01:21:54,409 --> 01:21:56,477
Look, I screwed up.
1396
01:21:56,479 --> 01:21:58,812
Even though I had
the best intentions.
1397
01:21:58,814 --> 01:22:03,317
But once I realized no major league
club would ever hire me again,
1398
01:22:03,319 --> 01:22:05,319
I didn't get angry.
1399
01:22:05,321 --> 01:22:06,954
I got defiant.
1400
01:22:07,088 --> 01:22:09,924
Screw those guys.
Who needs them?
1401
01:22:11,393 --> 01:22:14,662
The owners had done me a favor,
chucking me out of their sport.
1402
01:22:14,664 --> 01:22:19,333
Now I could travel the world searching
for the game in its purest form.
1403
01:22:19,335 --> 01:22:23,037
Hardball, softball,
wiffle ball, cricket.
1404
01:22:23,039 --> 01:22:27,241
Pay me in cash, pay me in
lager, don't pay me at all.
1405
01:22:27,475 --> 01:22:29,043
But I'll be there.
1406
01:22:29,045 --> 01:22:31,478
Ready to get guys out.
1407
01:22:46,127 --> 01:22:47,761
Good morning!
1408
01:22:50,532 --> 01:22:51,532
Hey!
1409
01:23:12,120 --> 01:23:17,091
I get invited to come and throw out
the first pitch a lot these days.
1410
01:23:17,592 --> 01:23:22,363
And I tell 'em, only if I can
throw out all the rest.
1411
01:23:23,598 --> 01:23:26,967
Bill "the spaceman" Lee!
1412
01:23:40,415 --> 01:23:43,817
I keep playing
because I have no choice.
1413
01:23:44,686 --> 01:23:46,754
I'm a ball player.
1414
01:23:47,122 --> 01:23:48,922
As Jim Bouton once said,
1415
01:23:48,924 --> 01:23:52,826
"you spend a good piece of
your life gripping a baseball.
1416
01:23:52,828 --> 01:23:59,466
"And in the end, it turns out that
it was the other way around."