0 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:20,000 1 00:00:10,300 --> 00:00:13,180 Step one: reconnaissance. 2 00:00:13,180 --> 00:00:15,060 First you need to identify your target. 3 00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:20,220 How about her? 4 00:00:22,020 --> 00:00:23,580 No, she's not planning on taking anything 5 00:00:23,580 --> 00:00:25,500 home with her tonight. 6 00:00:28,260 --> 00:00:29,820 What about that hottie down there? 7 00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:32,700 Nope. 8 00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,620 Not buying. 9 00:00:36,060 --> 00:00:37,020 There. 10 00:00:37,100 --> 00:00:38,620 How about this guy? 11 00:00:38,740 --> 00:00:39,700 Maybe. 12 00:00:39,780 --> 00:00:42,900 But he looks like the type of guy that would lowball me. 13 00:00:43,100 --> 00:00:44,820 Service manager, line three. 14 00:00:45,020 --> 00:00:46,940 Service manager, line three. 15 00:00:47,420 --> 00:00:48,380 There. 16 00:00:48,740 --> 00:00:50,300 She's the one. 17 00:00:50,580 --> 00:00:52,220 I bet I'll have her sold in less than five minutes. 18 00:00:52,220 --> 00:00:53,900 Come on. 19 00:00:53,900 --> 00:00:55,740 Not only that, 20 00:00:55,740 --> 00:00:57,180 I'm gonna sell her the flame car. 21 00:00:57,660 --> 00:00:58,820 No way. 22 00:00:59,780 --> 00:01:01,020 Watch this. 23 00:01:02,060 --> 00:01:04,340 Yes, Mrs. Kennedy, I realize it's the only one 24 00:01:04,340 --> 00:01:07,220 in the city, and that is why I'm holding it for you. 25 00:01:07,220 --> 00:01:09,140 You are going to single-handedly 26 00:01:09,140 --> 00:01:11,060 make it stylish for women to drive cars 27 00:01:11,060 --> 00:01:12,780 with flames on them. 28 00:01:13,380 --> 00:01:16,420 Exactly, more chic than women smoking cigars. 29 00:01:16,820 --> 00:01:19,220 I promise you I will not sell it to anyone else. 30 00:01:19,500 --> 00:01:20,260 You're very welcome. 31 00:01:20,260 --> 00:01:21,420 I'll see you in half an hour. 32 00:01:21,620 --> 00:01:23,060 All right. 33 00:01:29,180 --> 00:01:31,460 Excuse me. 34 00:01:31,660 --> 00:01:33,860 Can you tell me about this car here? 35 00:01:38,780 --> 00:01:40,220 Wow. 36 00:01:40,220 --> 00:01:41,540 You got her digits, too, didn't you? 37 00:01:41,660 --> 00:01:42,620 Mm-hmm. 38 00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:44,340 I don't know how you do it. 39 00:01:44,540 --> 00:01:46,340 Hate to admit it, man, but it's my dad. 40 00:01:46,460 --> 00:01:47,900 That's why he owns the place. 41 00:01:47,900 --> 00:01:49,340 Hey, your dad's got about a dozen more 42 00:01:49,340 --> 00:01:50,700 flame cars in the back. 43 00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:52,500 You care which color I bring out next to the showroom? 44 00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:53,940 Your call. 45 00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:09,100 Good to see you, Mrs. Cranston. 46 00:02:09,100 --> 00:02:10,540 David, I missed you. 47 00:02:10,540 --> 00:02:12,300 I missed you, too. 48 00:02:17,580 --> 00:02:19,980 David. 49 00:02:19,980 --> 00:02:21,900 I'm surprised you remember how to find the place. 50 00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:23,100 Where is he? 51 00:02:23,100 --> 00:02:24,620 He's in the game room. 52 00:02:24,980 --> 00:02:26,700 He's expecting you. 53 00:02:27,380 --> 00:02:29,300 You two haven't spoken in how long? 54 00:02:29,300 --> 00:02:31,500 And you think I'm just gonna let you show up 55 00:02:31,540 --> 00:02:32,460 and surprise him? 56 00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:37,180 I hear you're gonna drag my husband out again tonight. 57 00:02:37,260 --> 00:02:38,980 Yup, just gonna play a little poker 58 00:02:38,980 --> 00:02:40,260 at the dealership with the boys. 59 00:02:40,340 --> 00:02:42,700 That's on his list of approved activities, isn't it? 60 00:02:43,060 --> 00:02:44,860 Don't even try and play me 61 00:02:44,900 --> 00:02:47,100 like you play your little bimbos, okay? 62 00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:48,540 Rob already caved. 63 00:02:48,900 --> 00:02:51,020 I know all about your plans. 64 00:02:51,020 --> 00:02:52,140 I don't know what you're talking about. 65 00:02:52,540 --> 00:02:53,300 Huh. 66 00:02:53,300 --> 00:02:55,780 I'm sure you're gonna find quality ladies at... 67 00:02:55,780 --> 00:02:57,300 What's the name of that club Rob told me? 68 00:02:57,300 --> 00:02:59,340 I think it was Imagine. 69 00:03:03,860 --> 00:03:05,260 Image. 70 00:03:05,260 --> 00:03:06,620 And we're going to a nicer club this time. 71 00:03:06,700 --> 00:03:07,580 Why? 72 00:03:07,580 --> 00:03:10,140 To find nicer bimbos? 73 00:03:10,140 --> 00:03:11,500 Okay. 74 00:03:11,860 --> 00:03:13,420 He's married, David. 75 00:03:13,420 --> 00:03:15,100 Stop dragging him to these things. 76 00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:26,300 Hey, hey, I've been trying to get a hold of you, David. 77 00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:29,220 I think he had a mild stroke about an hour ago. 78 00:03:29,220 --> 00:03:31,060 What, what? 79 00:03:33,020 --> 00:03:33,740 Oh, my... oh, my God. 80 00:03:33,740 --> 00:03:35,140 Oh, Grandpa! 81 00:03:36,460 --> 00:03:37,900 Oh, Grandpa. 82 00:03:38,380 --> 00:03:39,260 Grandpa. 83 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:41,900 Hey, Grandpa, can your hear me, are you all right? 84 00:03:41,900 --> 00:03:42,940 Oh, my God, I can't believe this. 85 00:03:42,940 --> 00:03:45,340 I'm so sorry, Grandpa. 86 00:03:45,820 --> 00:03:47,700 You were like a father to me. 87 00:03:47,700 --> 00:03:50,140 I love you so much. 88 00:03:50,140 --> 00:03:53,140 Da... vid... 89 00:03:53,140 --> 00:03:54,300 Da... David, yeah. 90 00:03:54,380 --> 00:03:56,100 Grandpa, it's me, it's David. 91 00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:57,540 I... 92 00:03:58,020 --> 00:03:59,940 I... 93 00:03:59,940 --> 00:04:01,380 got... 94 00:04:01,380 --> 00:04:02,820 you. 95 00:04:02,820 --> 00:04:04,260 I got you, yes. 96 00:04:04,260 --> 00:04:05,220 Of course you've got me, Grandpa. 97 00:04:05,220 --> 00:04:07,140 I'm right here. 98 00:04:07,140 --> 00:04:08,540 I got you! 99 00:04:11,220 --> 00:04:12,740 You sick son of a bitch. 100 00:04:12,740 --> 00:04:14,300 I can't believe you did that. 101 00:04:14,300 --> 00:04:16,300 I can't believe you fell for that. 102 00:04:16,300 --> 00:04:18,220 You think they'd just leave me sitting out here 103 00:04:18,220 --> 00:04:19,700 after I just had a stroke? 104 00:04:19,700 --> 00:04:20,740 All right, this was a bad idea. 105 00:04:21,100 --> 00:04:23,740 No, no, no, don't go. 106 00:04:23,740 --> 00:04:26,620 I'm sorry, it was a bad joke. 107 00:04:26,900 --> 00:04:29,180 I'm sorry. 108 00:04:29,980 --> 00:04:31,220 But I gotta say, 109 00:04:31,420 --> 00:04:33,340 it was nice having the old David back for a moment 110 00:04:33,420 --> 00:04:35,220 and hearing such nice things. 111 00:04:35,220 --> 00:04:37,220 There's no old David. 112 00:04:38,660 --> 00:04:41,580 Okay, it's just me. 113 00:04:41,580 --> 00:04:43,500 Well, how have you been? 114 00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:45,420 Fine... you? 115 00:04:45,420 --> 00:04:47,820 Oh, my dentures don't fit 116 00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:50,220 and I'm growing a bunion. 117 00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:52,140 But I ain't got hemorrhoids. 118 00:04:52,140 --> 00:04:54,540 So I guess I can't complain. 119 00:04:54,540 --> 00:04:56,940 It's these others who are sick. 120 00:04:56,940 --> 00:04:58,860 It's depressing. 121 00:04:58,860 --> 00:05:01,260 I hope I don't look like that when I'm their age. 122 00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:03,660 You're 84, you are their age. 123 00:05:03,660 --> 00:05:05,580 They're in their 90s. 124 00:05:06,060 --> 00:05:08,420 Hell, that guy over there I think's 150. 125 00:05:08,420 --> 00:05:10,900 He knows too much about the Civil War. 126 00:05:13,260 --> 00:05:16,100 You still in that crappy job of yours, 127 00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:18,020 selling cars with your dad? 128 00:05:21,860 --> 00:05:23,780 Play some chess like the old days? 129 00:05:25,540 --> 00:05:27,140 Do you know what today is? 130 00:05:31,060 --> 00:05:32,980 She was my wife, David. 131 00:05:32,980 --> 00:05:34,300 Of course I know. 132 00:05:34,860 --> 00:05:37,740 It's been two years, Grandpa. 133 00:05:37,740 --> 00:05:41,100 Carrie tells me that you don't talk to anyone. 134 00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:42,540 You sit around sad all day. 135 00:05:42,540 --> 00:05:44,780 You can't go on like this. 136 00:05:44,780 --> 00:05:46,780 I'm lost without her. 137 00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:49,260 Sometimes it's hard to get through the day. 138 00:05:51,660 --> 00:05:53,580 I can't take it anymore. 139 00:05:55,500 --> 00:05:58,780 You know, last week, I almost tried to end it. 140 00:05:58,780 --> 00:06:00,300 - Off myself. - That's not funny. 141 00:06:00,300 --> 00:06:02,220 Don't you wanna know how? 142 00:06:02,220 --> 00:06:03,660 Straight razor. 143 00:06:03,660 --> 00:06:04,620 I figured, well, if I'm gonna go, 144 00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:06,540 it's got to be dramatic. 145 00:06:06,540 --> 00:06:07,500 A big, bloody mess. 146 00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:10,380 All right, enough, Grandpa, okay. 147 00:06:10,380 --> 00:06:13,980 This has gone on far too long. 148 00:06:13,980 --> 00:06:16,220 It's time that you started 149 00:06:16,220 --> 00:06:20,220 socializing with women. 150 00:06:20,220 --> 00:06:24,380 Oh, no, I'm too old. 151 00:06:24,380 --> 00:06:26,180 Grandma told me you promised her. 152 00:06:28,620 --> 00:06:30,060 Yeah. 153 00:06:30,060 --> 00:06:31,980 Yeah, I did. 154 00:06:31,980 --> 00:06:35,820 And I never broke a promise to that sweet woman. 155 00:06:35,820 --> 00:06:38,580 And I tried, but I just couldn't. 156 00:06:40,260 --> 00:06:42,660 Well, I promised her something, too. 157 00:06:43,140 --> 00:06:44,580 That I would help you keep your promise 158 00:06:44,580 --> 00:06:46,860 to her if you couldn't. 159 00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:48,940 Well, I'm gonna help you. 160 00:06:48,940 --> 00:06:51,340 You're gonna help me? 161 00:06:51,340 --> 00:06:53,260 Who's gonna help you? 162 00:06:53,260 --> 00:06:55,180 No offense, David, but you never were 163 00:06:55,180 --> 00:06:57,940 a real Rudolph Valentino with the women. 164 00:06:58,420 --> 00:07:00,820 Actually, Grandpa, you might find this hard to believe, 165 00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:02,260 but over the past few years, 166 00:07:02,260 --> 00:07:04,700 I've become quite the chick magnet. 167 00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:07,980 Yeah, that is hard for me to believe. 168 00:07:07,980 --> 00:07:09,900 What are you doing tonight? 169 00:07:09,900 --> 00:07:12,260 Oh, I got big plans tonight. 170 00:07:12,260 --> 00:07:15,580 "60 Minutes" is doing an Andy Rooney retrospective. 171 00:07:15,580 --> 00:07:17,740 Well, you can record it. 172 00:07:17,740 --> 00:07:20,220 Because, like it or not, we're going out. 173 00:07:20,700 --> 00:07:21,860 - We are? - Yup. 174 00:07:23,780 --> 00:07:27,140 If you wanna win the game with women, 175 00:07:27,140 --> 00:07:28,580 you first have to learn 176 00:07:29,060 --> 00:07:30,500 how to play the game. 177 00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:32,900 I'm gonna teach you every trick I've got. 178 00:07:34,780 --> 00:07:36,220 Swell. 179 00:07:36,220 --> 00:07:37,660 Where are we going? 180 00:07:38,140 --> 00:07:41,420 Well, if you wanna meet women... 181 00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:43,460 you go where the women meet. 182 00:07:50,260 --> 00:07:51,700 Yo, Sergio. 183 00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:55,060 I need two drafts and a glass of hot water with lemon. 184 00:08:01,780 --> 00:08:05,140 So... I saw your wife at the home today. 185 00:08:05,140 --> 00:08:06,100 Lovely as usual. 186 00:08:06,580 --> 00:08:07,540 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 187 00:08:07,540 --> 00:08:09,460 You went with the poker story, right? 188 00:08:09,460 --> 00:08:10,900 Yeah, and she told me you caved already. 189 00:08:10,900 --> 00:08:12,820 What? 190 00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:14,260 Please say you didn't tell her. 191 00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:15,700 You know how she hates when I go rolling 192 00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:16,660 for honeys with you! 193 00:08:17,020 --> 00:08:17,780 She told me you caved already! 194 00:08:17,780 --> 00:08:19,220 Oh, what? 195 00:08:19,220 --> 00:08:21,140 You idiot, I didn't cave. 196 00:08:21,140 --> 00:08:22,580 You caved! 197 00:08:22,580 --> 00:08:25,460 Oh, she... she totally played you. 198 00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:26,700 Damn it. 199 00:08:26,900 --> 00:08:28,820 Damn it. 200 00:08:43,620 --> 00:08:46,020 There you go. 201 00:08:46,020 --> 00:08:46,980 All right. 202 00:08:46,980 --> 00:08:48,420 What are you expecting, a flood? 203 00:08:48,420 --> 00:08:49,860 Come on. 204 00:08:49,860 --> 00:08:52,260 There you go. 205 00:08:52,260 --> 00:08:53,700 Okay. 206 00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:56,860 You okay there? 207 00:08:57,060 --> 00:08:58,300 Hemorrhoids. 208 00:08:58,500 --> 00:09:00,420 No, I don't have hemorrhoids. 209 00:09:00,420 --> 00:09:01,860 I'm avoiding them. 210 00:09:01,860 --> 00:09:03,260 Ahh! 211 00:09:03,260 --> 00:09:05,620 Did you know the average person experiences 212 00:09:05,660 --> 00:09:07,060 over three "G"s of pressure 213 00:09:07,100 --> 00:09:09,140 in their butt as they sit down? 214 00:09:09,180 --> 00:09:11,060 Uh, no, no, I didn't know that. 215 00:09:11,100 --> 00:09:13,940 Yeah, the slower you sit, the less "G"s. 216 00:09:13,940 --> 00:09:16,580 The way I do it, it's like I'm sitting on the moon. 217 00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:17,780 That's fascinating, Mr. Ward. 218 00:09:17,820 --> 00:09:21,140 You're full of interesting factoids. 219 00:09:21,180 --> 00:09:23,540 The Discovery Channel never lets me down. 220 00:09:23,580 --> 00:09:26,420 And not only that... 221 00:09:26,420 --> 00:09:27,460 Whoa! 222 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:30,740 I was an apprentice to Harry Houdini back in the day. 223 00:09:30,740 --> 00:09:31,700 It's... 224 00:09:31,740 --> 00:09:33,220 It's true, David. 225 00:09:33,260 --> 00:09:34,180 I was in the tank with him 226 00:09:34,220 --> 00:09:35,620 at the Shelton for his last show. 227 00:09:35,660 --> 00:09:37,540 He taught me everything he knew. 228 00:09:37,580 --> 00:09:39,220 The secret to the milk-can escape... 229 00:09:39,260 --> 00:09:41,220 Are you ready to get to work, Grandpa? 230 00:09:41,260 --> 00:09:42,660 Oh, yes, sir. 231 00:09:42,700 --> 00:09:44,100 - Ready and waiting. - Okay, good. 232 00:09:44,620 --> 00:09:46,500 Step one... 233 00:09:50,060 --> 00:09:51,940 Step one: reconnaissance. 234 00:09:51,980 --> 00:09:54,660 First you need to identify your target. 235 00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:57,060 I go for a nice-looking, intelligent girl 236 00:09:57,060 --> 00:09:59,940 who I think can keep up with me intellectually. 237 00:09:59,940 --> 00:10:01,780 What about her? 238 00:10:02,780 --> 00:10:04,180 Nice, but she's drinking red wine, 239 00:10:04,220 --> 00:10:06,500 and I like this shirt way too much. 240 00:10:06,540 --> 00:10:08,020 Ultimately, I give up on the nice girl 241 00:10:08,060 --> 00:10:08,980 and go for the hot chick. 242 00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:10,580 What? Metamucil? 243 00:10:10,620 --> 00:10:11,540 Oh, forgive me. 244 00:10:11,580 --> 00:10:12,580 Where are my manners? 245 00:10:12,580 --> 00:10:14,100 Oh, that's... 246 00:10:14,100 --> 00:10:16,020 Oh, no, no, no... Okay. Cool. 247 00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:22,740 Oh. There. 248 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:30,260 All right, now, step two: 249 00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:31,700 the approach. 250 00:10:31,740 --> 00:10:34,020 You have to meet her, or, more accurately, 251 00:10:34,060 --> 00:10:35,460 you have her meet you. 252 00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:36,900 Planned spontaneity, Grandpa. 253 00:10:36,940 --> 00:10:38,340 That's the name of the game. 254 00:10:41,660 --> 00:10:44,980 You gotta have her thinking that she discovered you. 255 00:10:45,020 --> 00:10:47,860 If she knows you're pursuing her, it's all over. 256 00:10:48,860 --> 00:10:50,260 - Excuse me. - Oh! 257 00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:52,180 Oh, my God, I am so sorry. 258 00:10:52,220 --> 00:10:53,140 That jerk-face. 259 00:10:53,660 --> 00:10:54,580 Sure it's childish. 260 00:10:54,620 --> 00:10:56,500 But if you find a woman drinking club soda, 261 00:10:56,540 --> 00:10:58,900 the shirt practically cleans itself. 262 00:10:58,940 --> 00:11:01,300 Here, let me buy you a drink. 263 00:11:01,340 --> 00:11:02,740 - All right. - Come on. 264 00:11:02,780 --> 00:11:04,660 Step three: the buildup. 265 00:11:04,700 --> 00:11:06,580 You gotta get her interested in you. 266 00:11:06,620 --> 00:11:08,020 And that's easy. 267 00:11:08,060 --> 00:11:09,940 You just show her how smart you are. 268 00:11:09,980 --> 00:11:11,860 You know, I never understood why this salt thing 269 00:11:11,900 --> 00:11:14,260 takes out stains. 270 00:11:14,300 --> 00:11:18,100 Well, salt is actually sodium chloride 271 00:11:18,140 --> 00:11:19,540 and the water from the stain 272 00:11:19,580 --> 00:11:22,420 sublimates the molecule's ionic bonds, 273 00:11:22,460 --> 00:11:26,260 which releases energy and cleans the stain. 274 00:11:26,300 --> 00:11:28,100 Sometimes you gotta make stuff up. 275 00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:30,020 But if you say it with confidence, 276 00:11:30,060 --> 00:11:31,460 it's safe to assume they're not gonna look it up 277 00:11:31,500 --> 00:11:33,380 to see if you're right. 278 00:11:33,380 --> 00:11:34,820 Sergio, Sergio. 279 00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:37,220 Step four: the follow-through. 280 00:11:37,220 --> 00:11:39,140 Just in case things don't go well that night, 281 00:11:39,460 --> 00:11:41,460 always have some reason to see her again. 282 00:11:41,460 --> 00:11:42,900 David, I almost forgot. 283 00:11:43,380 --> 00:11:45,780 You won a sweet item from the charity raffle last month. 284 00:11:45,780 --> 00:11:46,740 Congrats. 285 00:11:46,980 --> 00:11:48,260 Thank you, that's great. 286 00:11:50,660 --> 00:11:52,100 It's dinner for two at Charlie Trotter's. 287 00:11:52,100 --> 00:11:53,540 This is my mom's favorite restaurant. 288 00:11:53,580 --> 00:11:54,980 She'll be so excited. 289 00:11:55,020 --> 00:11:56,900 Oh, that's so sweet. 290 00:11:56,940 --> 00:11:58,820 Oh, no, it expires on Sunday 291 00:11:58,860 --> 00:12:01,700 and she's out of town this weekend. 292 00:12:01,740 --> 00:12:03,620 This sucks. 293 00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:09,860 Hey, you know what... 294 00:12:09,860 --> 00:12:12,740 she can't use 'em, there's no use letting 'em go to waste. 295 00:12:12,740 --> 00:12:16,100 Would you like to go? 296 00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:18,020 Sure, I'd love to. 297 00:12:18,020 --> 00:12:19,460 Great. 298 00:12:19,940 --> 00:12:22,820 Just take somebody who appreciates good food. 299 00:12:24,900 --> 00:12:28,180 This move is like the Jedi mind trick. 300 00:12:28,180 --> 00:12:29,940 "Why don't you go with me? 301 00:12:29,940 --> 00:12:31,540 They're your certificates." 302 00:12:33,540 --> 00:12:35,940 Well, hey, they're your certificates. 303 00:12:35,940 --> 00:12:37,380 Why don't you go with me? 304 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,100 And the most important step? 305 00:12:42,100 --> 00:12:45,060 Step five: the Groucho effect. 306 00:12:45,060 --> 00:12:46,020 Groucho Marx once said, 307 00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:47,460 "I wouldn't belong to any club 308 00:12:47,460 --> 00:12:49,380 that would have me as a member." 309 00:12:49,860 --> 00:12:51,300 Well, it was very nice meeting you, Susan, 310 00:12:51,300 --> 00:12:52,820 and I look forward to dinner. 311 00:12:52,820 --> 00:12:54,260 Leaving so soon? 312 00:12:54,260 --> 00:12:56,020 If you show interest in a girl too soon, 313 00:12:56,580 --> 00:12:58,500 if she gets into the club too easily, 314 00:12:58,500 --> 00:12:59,940 she thinks she can do better. 315 00:12:59,940 --> 00:13:01,380 You know what? 316 00:13:01,380 --> 00:13:03,540 I promised my girlfriend I would try and stop by tonight. 317 00:13:03,540 --> 00:13:05,460 Your girlfriend? 318 00:13:05,460 --> 00:13:08,260 But if you make her work to get into the club, 319 00:13:08,260 --> 00:13:10,660 she thinks she's lucky to get you. 320 00:13:10,660 --> 00:13:12,900 Why don't you stay for just one more glass of wine? 321 00:13:12,900 --> 00:13:13,940 You know what? 322 00:13:14,420 --> 00:13:16,260 I'd love to, but I really shouldn't. 323 00:13:16,420 --> 00:13:18,900 It's extremely difficult and a bit of a gamble. 324 00:13:19,380 --> 00:13:21,300 But if you have patience and play the game right, 325 00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:22,740 it pays off. 326 00:13:22,740 --> 00:13:24,180 Come on. 327 00:13:24,180 --> 00:13:26,340 One more glass isn't gonna kill you, is it? 328 00:13:26,340 --> 00:13:27,780 And when she fills your wine glass 329 00:13:28,260 --> 00:13:30,180 slightly more than hers, 330 00:13:30,180 --> 00:13:32,740 it means she wants to take advantage of you. 331 00:13:32,740 --> 00:13:33,700 That's when you know you've won. 332 00:13:33,700 --> 00:13:34,660 Cheers. 333 00:13:35,140 --> 00:13:36,580 Game over. 334 00:13:40,940 --> 00:13:42,980 Watching you in action last night, 335 00:13:42,980 --> 00:13:44,980 David, was amazing. 336 00:13:44,980 --> 00:13:46,900 Just amazing. 337 00:13:46,900 --> 00:13:48,820 Rob get you home okay? 338 00:13:48,820 --> 00:13:49,780 Forget about me. 339 00:13:49,780 --> 00:13:52,660 I wanna hear what happened with you. 340 00:13:52,660 --> 00:13:54,580 Well, let me put it this way. 341 00:13:54,580 --> 00:13:55,620 Look what I'm wearing. 342 00:13:57,940 --> 00:14:00,820 It's the same clothes I wore last night. 343 00:14:00,820 --> 00:14:03,220 Well, I'll be glad to pay for some new clothes 344 00:14:03,220 --> 00:14:04,500 if things are a little tight. 345 00:14:04,500 --> 00:14:06,900 No, I didn't change clothes 346 00:14:06,900 --> 00:14:08,740 from last night. 347 00:14:08,740 --> 00:14:10,580 Talk about lazy. 348 00:14:10,580 --> 00:14:12,020 Think, Grandpa. 349 00:14:12,020 --> 00:14:12,980 Think. 350 00:14:13,460 --> 00:14:15,140 Why didn't I change clothes? 351 00:14:20,420 --> 00:14:21,860 Ohh! 352 00:14:21,860 --> 00:14:23,780 Oh, you devil, you! 353 00:14:24,740 --> 00:14:25,700 All right, all right. 354 00:14:25,780 --> 00:14:27,220 Listen. 355 00:14:27,380 --> 00:14:29,780 Step one: reconnaissance. 356 00:14:29,780 --> 00:14:32,100 Do you know what kind of woman you wanna meet? 357 00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:34,660 Yeah, your grandmother. 358 00:14:35,220 --> 00:14:37,620 Let me explain something to you, David. 359 00:14:37,620 --> 00:14:39,540 I'm not gonna waste my time 360 00:14:39,540 --> 00:14:41,460 on just anybody. 361 00:14:41,460 --> 00:14:43,380 I have needs, you see. 362 00:14:43,380 --> 00:14:45,700 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 363 00:14:45,700 --> 00:14:47,620 Hold on. 364 00:14:48,100 --> 00:14:49,060 Needs? 365 00:14:49,060 --> 00:14:50,500 Are you... 366 00:14:50,500 --> 00:14:52,900 are you saying that you can still... 367 00:14:53,380 --> 00:14:54,260 do the wild thing? 368 00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:55,300 The what thing? 369 00:14:55,300 --> 00:14:59,380 That you're still able to... perform. 370 00:14:59,380 --> 00:15:00,900 On stage? 371 00:15:01,380 --> 00:15:02,820 In bed. 372 00:15:03,300 --> 00:15:05,620 Oh... 373 00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:07,060 No way. 374 00:15:07,060 --> 00:15:08,500 Are you kidding? 375 00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:11,380 That thing died years before your grandmother did. 376 00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:14,100 Should have had it amputated for all the good it does. 377 00:15:14,660 --> 00:15:17,140 So then what are these needs? 378 00:15:17,140 --> 00:15:19,620 A man needs the real McCoy. 379 00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:22,180 The only thing that matters. 380 00:15:22,660 --> 00:15:23,620 Beauty? 381 00:15:23,940 --> 00:15:25,780 What, brains? 382 00:15:26,260 --> 00:15:27,620 Companionship. 383 00:15:29,060 --> 00:15:31,620 Have you ever had a companion in your life, David? 384 00:15:31,620 --> 00:15:33,300 Sure, I've dated lots of girls. 385 00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,820 Oh, horse feathers. 386 00:15:34,820 --> 00:15:38,580 I mean a real companion. 387 00:15:38,580 --> 00:15:41,060 Mmm, how would I know? 388 00:15:41,060 --> 00:15:44,900 There's only two ways to know she's your real companion. 389 00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:47,300 You either know it when you meet her, 390 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:50,100 or know it when you lose her. 391 00:15:50,100 --> 00:15:53,420 Your companion is a woman you care about. 392 00:15:53,460 --> 00:15:56,300 A woman you could call your best friend. 393 00:15:56,340 --> 00:15:58,740 A woman you could tell anything to. 394 00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:04,580 A woman whose hand you really want to hold. 395 00:16:04,580 --> 00:16:09,060 That's the first time we held hands as man and wife. 396 00:16:09,060 --> 00:16:12,900 We didn't let go for four hours and 23 minutes. 397 00:16:12,900 --> 00:16:14,820 I timed it. 398 00:16:14,820 --> 00:16:16,260 But eventually nature called, 399 00:16:16,260 --> 00:16:18,660 and I had to let go. 400 00:16:18,660 --> 00:16:21,380 Your great-grandmother served fried chicken at the reception 401 00:16:21,380 --> 00:16:24,700 that went through me like a racecar. 402 00:16:24,740 --> 00:16:26,180 But the point is, 403 00:16:26,740 --> 00:16:29,620 that's what your grandmother was to me. 404 00:16:29,620 --> 00:16:31,700 The old bearcat. 405 00:16:32,020 --> 00:16:34,100 Companion, huh? 406 00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:36,340 That's what it's all about. 407 00:16:36,820 --> 00:16:38,660 And that's what I need. 408 00:16:42,340 --> 00:16:43,740 Oh, shoot. 409 00:16:43,780 --> 00:16:45,180 Where are you going? 410 00:16:45,220 --> 00:16:47,020 I'm so... I gotta get to work, Grandpa. 411 00:16:47,060 --> 00:16:49,020 Dad's gonna kill me. 412 00:16:49,060 --> 00:16:52,660 Well, are you coming back to help me? 413 00:16:52,660 --> 00:16:54,100 I already taught you everything you need to know 414 00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,060 about meeting women. 415 00:16:55,060 --> 00:16:56,300 You just gotta do it now. 416 00:16:56,820 --> 00:16:58,740 Will I see you again, David? 417 00:16:58,740 --> 00:17:00,180 Sure. 418 00:17:00,180 --> 00:17:03,380 When? 419 00:17:03,380 --> 00:17:05,300 I don't know. 420 00:17:05,300 --> 00:17:06,740 Soon, okay? 421 00:17:06,740 --> 00:17:08,180 I'll see you soon. 422 00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:13,900 I don't care if it's on hold. 423 00:17:13,940 --> 00:17:15,340 Take it off hold... I got cash. 424 00:17:15,380 --> 00:17:17,260 I want this flame car today. 425 00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:18,700 Pick up line two. 426 00:17:19,220 --> 00:17:20,620 Abby in the loan department. 427 00:17:21,460 --> 00:17:24,540 Sold another flame car. 428 00:17:24,580 --> 00:17:25,980 Sign it. 429 00:17:27,940 --> 00:17:29,820 How's the profit on this one? 430 00:17:29,860 --> 00:17:32,420 18%. 431 00:17:32,420 --> 00:17:36,140 David... you have the gift. 432 00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:38,940 Like that thing you do with the customer where you say, 433 00:17:39,460 --> 00:17:42,780 "Oh, I'm sorry, you can't have this car". 434 00:17:42,820 --> 00:17:44,580 I mean, that's beautiful. 435 00:17:44,580 --> 00:17:48,260 It's like you have a sixth sense 436 00:17:48,260 --> 00:17:50,660 for reading and closing. 437 00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:56,540 How's your grandfather? 438 00:17:57,860 --> 00:18:00,540 Oh, you think I'm an idiot. 439 00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:03,580 You buy him a place in a retirement community, 440 00:18:03,620 --> 00:18:06,380 then he ignores you all this time, 441 00:18:06,420 --> 00:18:09,780 and you come back with an olive branch? 442 00:18:10,180 --> 00:18:12,020 Even your mother, God rest her soul, 443 00:18:12,020 --> 00:18:14,420 she wouldn't want you to have anything to do with him. 444 00:18:14,420 --> 00:18:16,860 All right, thanks for the advice, Dick. 445 00:18:16,900 --> 00:18:19,100 Like I've told you, David. 446 00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:21,780 When it's just the two of us here at work, 447 00:18:21,780 --> 00:18:24,020 you can call me Dad. 448 00:18:25,060 --> 00:18:26,460 Okay... Dick. 449 00:18:28,180 --> 00:18:30,180 Okay, bye. 450 00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:32,180 So not only did you blow 451 00:18:32,740 --> 00:18:33,700 "the poker night with the guys" story, 452 00:18:34,180 --> 00:18:35,140 but your grandfather told Carrie 453 00:18:35,140 --> 00:18:36,820 all the details about last night. 454 00:18:36,820 --> 00:18:38,260 Hey, listen. 455 00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,460 I have only two joys in this life. 456 00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:44,300 One is watching you be the bachelor that I never was, 457 00:18:44,300 --> 00:18:45,740 and the other is being 458 00:18:45,780 --> 00:18:47,620 the pro football quarterback that I never was. 459 00:18:47,620 --> 00:18:48,940 You realize how sad that is? 460 00:18:48,980 --> 00:18:50,940 Carrie is freaking out. 461 00:18:51,460 --> 00:18:53,820 And now both my joys are at risk. 462 00:18:53,860 --> 00:18:55,740 She's not gonna play football tomorrow. 463 00:18:55,780 --> 00:18:57,180 I'm sorry, man. 464 00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:58,700 No, no, no need to apologize. 465 00:18:58,700 --> 00:19:00,620 Because, as punishment for screwing up, 466 00:19:00,660 --> 00:19:02,060 you're gonna sub for her in tomorrow's game. 467 00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:03,100 Oh, come on. 468 00:19:03,140 --> 00:19:04,420 Yes, you are. 469 00:19:07,700 --> 00:19:10,500 Teams three and ten, game on! 470 00:19:11,060 --> 00:19:12,020 Okay, guys, let's do this. 471 00:19:12,020 --> 00:19:14,420 James, you got a scouting report? 472 00:19:14,420 --> 00:19:16,340 The ref called the wrong team. 473 00:19:16,340 --> 00:19:17,780 We're not even supposed to play these guys. 474 00:19:17,780 --> 00:19:19,700 So I don't have any info. 475 00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:20,660 Whatever. 476 00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:22,580 Okay, let's see what these guys are made of. 477 00:19:22,580 --> 00:19:24,500 Joanie, down and out. 478 00:19:24,500 --> 00:19:25,940 David, fake and go long. 479 00:19:26,420 --> 00:19:28,340 Break. 480 00:19:28,340 --> 00:19:30,500 All right, let's go, let's go. 481 00:19:35,620 --> 00:19:37,180 You're covering me? 482 00:19:38,220 --> 00:19:39,780 No, I didn't mean anything sexist. 483 00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:41,940 I just wanna confirm, you're covering me? 484 00:19:41,940 --> 00:19:44,140 You know, I bet I'm better at this game than you are. 485 00:19:45,660 --> 00:19:47,100 I don't think so. 486 00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:48,860 Hike. 487 00:19:59,380 --> 00:20:00,900 Oh! 488 00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:02,820 What is that? 489 00:20:09,780 --> 00:20:11,700 I think so. 490 00:20:17,860 --> 00:20:20,260 Oh, your elbow's bleeding. 491 00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:22,660 Oh, it's a little "abrusion". 492 00:20:23,140 --> 00:20:24,580 "Abrusion"? 493 00:20:24,580 --> 00:20:26,500 Yeah, you know, it's like a bruise and an abrasion. 494 00:20:26,500 --> 00:20:28,900 It's a new word just released by Webster's last week. 495 00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,340 Didn't get the memo. 496 00:20:30,340 --> 00:20:31,780 You will, I'm on the committee. 497 00:20:31,780 --> 00:20:32,740 You sound very bright. 498 00:20:32,740 --> 00:20:33,700 Oh, yeah, I'm Mensa. 499 00:20:34,180 --> 00:20:35,140 Graduated eighth in my class. 500 00:20:35,140 --> 00:20:36,100 Really? 501 00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:38,020 Huh, I was seventh. 502 00:20:41,260 --> 00:20:44,380 If you wanna meet women, 503 00:20:44,780 --> 00:20:46,660 go where the women meet. 504 00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:07,780 Um... top... 505 00:21:07,780 --> 00:21:10,180 top of the morning to you, ma'am. 506 00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:12,100 How are you today? 507 00:21:12,100 --> 00:21:13,540 I'm good. 508 00:21:13,540 --> 00:21:15,940 Can I help you? 509 00:21:15,940 --> 00:21:18,340 My name's Joe. 510 00:21:18,340 --> 00:21:21,220 And I was wondering, uh... 511 00:21:21,220 --> 00:21:23,140 I was wondering if you'd like to 512 00:21:23,140 --> 00:21:25,380 have lunch, talk a bit and... 513 00:21:25,380 --> 00:21:27,860 Oh, how sweet. 514 00:21:27,860 --> 00:21:30,980 How old are you, Joe? 515 00:21:30,980 --> 00:21:33,420 Uh, I'm 79. 516 00:21:33,420 --> 00:21:36,860 Well, I'm very flattered, Joe. 517 00:21:36,860 --> 00:21:38,780 But I'm sorry. 518 00:21:38,780 --> 00:21:40,740 I don't date older men. 519 00:21:40,740 --> 00:21:41,700 Older men? 520 00:21:41,700 --> 00:21:43,620 We might have some fun for a while. 521 00:21:43,980 --> 00:21:45,500 But sooner or later, you would get sick, 522 00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:48,100 and I'll be the one that has to take care of you 523 00:21:48,100 --> 00:21:50,580 and eventually decide whether or not 524 00:21:50,580 --> 00:21:52,500 to take you off of life support. 525 00:21:52,740 --> 00:21:54,500 Been there, done that. 526 00:21:54,500 --> 00:21:56,420 I've earned my inheritance already. 527 00:21:56,420 --> 00:22:00,060 But now that's too much pressure for me. 528 00:22:00,060 --> 00:22:03,060 Now if you will excuse me, 529 00:22:03,060 --> 00:22:06,420 I'm late for a game of mah-jongg. 530 00:22:06,420 --> 00:22:07,860 Bye-bye. 531 00:22:23,220 --> 00:22:24,660 You're covering me? 532 00:22:24,660 --> 00:22:26,100 Seventh in your class, huh? 533 00:22:26,100 --> 00:22:28,020 Quick, what's the capital of Zambia? 534 00:22:28,500 --> 00:22:29,460 Lusaka. 535 00:22:29,460 --> 00:22:30,900 Right. 536 00:22:30,900 --> 00:22:33,300 Who's Bobby Brady's first kiss with? 537 00:22:33,300 --> 00:22:34,260 Millicent. 538 00:22:34,260 --> 00:22:36,180 But very good question. 539 00:22:36,180 --> 00:22:38,100 King of England, 1630. 540 00:22:38,100 --> 00:22:40,500 - George V. - Very impressive. 541 00:22:40,500 --> 00:22:43,380 You don't even know the answers to these questions. 542 00:22:43,380 --> 00:22:44,820 I certainly do. 543 00:22:44,820 --> 00:22:48,180 James II was king in 1630. 544 00:22:48,180 --> 00:22:49,500 Hike! 545 00:22:51,380 --> 00:22:53,860 I'm open! 546 00:22:54,340 --> 00:22:57,220 Go, Julie, go, go, go, go, go, go! 547 00:23:01,300 --> 00:23:02,260 Game over! 548 00:23:02,260 --> 00:23:03,220 Blue team wins it. 549 00:23:03,220 --> 00:23:04,140 Let's move. 550 00:23:04,700 --> 00:23:06,620 All right, Blue! 551 00:23:06,620 --> 00:23:09,500 Yeah, nice pass. 552 00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:10,460 Nice. 553 00:23:10,460 --> 00:23:13,820 Way to show her who's boss. 554 00:23:13,820 --> 00:23:15,260 She's a fast one, isn't she? 555 00:23:15,260 --> 00:23:17,660 Nice rack, too. 556 00:23:17,660 --> 00:23:20,540 Intriguing. 557 00:23:20,540 --> 00:23:22,460 - Overthrow me? - With pleasure. 558 00:23:25,820 --> 00:23:27,100 Oop. 559 00:23:27,660 --> 00:23:28,620 My bad. 560 00:23:30,540 --> 00:23:31,980 Here you go. 561 00:23:34,380 --> 00:23:36,300 Thanks. 562 00:23:36,780 --> 00:23:37,740 Thank you, come again. 563 00:23:38,220 --> 00:23:39,180 Next time, huh? 564 00:23:39,180 --> 00:23:40,620 I gotta go. 565 00:23:53,140 --> 00:23:55,220 Thank you. 566 00:23:55,220 --> 00:23:57,020 Oh, Rose. 567 00:23:57,020 --> 00:23:58,260 Over here, honey. 568 00:24:01,300 --> 00:24:02,740 That's my boyfriend. 569 00:24:03,220 --> 00:24:04,660 I've gotta go. 570 00:24:07,260 --> 00:24:09,660 A rose for Rose. 571 00:24:09,660 --> 00:24:11,100 Oh! 572 00:24:11,100 --> 00:24:12,540 Rose! 573 00:24:12,540 --> 00:24:13,980 Let's go. 574 00:24:26,180 --> 00:24:27,700 Hey, can we play team three today? 575 00:24:27,700 --> 00:24:29,620 Sorry, bro, schedule's set. 576 00:24:32,980 --> 00:24:35,300 This job gets better and better every week. 577 00:24:37,780 --> 00:24:39,220 Ingenious plan. 578 00:24:39,220 --> 00:24:42,100 I guess it didn't include her not showing up, did it? 579 00:24:44,500 --> 00:24:46,420 She ain't here. 580 00:24:47,860 --> 00:24:49,300 We're gonna kill them. 581 00:24:49,300 --> 00:24:50,260 Hey. 582 00:24:50,260 --> 00:24:52,660 Hey, I guess we're playing you guys again. 583 00:24:52,660 --> 00:24:54,100 I wonder how that happened, man. 584 00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:55,060 I don't know. 585 00:24:55,060 --> 00:24:56,500 Too bad you guys are missing that superstar girl 586 00:24:56,500 --> 00:24:57,940 you had last week, huh? 587 00:24:57,940 --> 00:24:59,380 - What was her name? - Julie Larabee. 588 00:24:59,380 --> 00:25:00,820 Julie Larabee, that's right. 589 00:25:00,820 --> 00:25:01,780 Hey, listen, we need a sub next week. 590 00:25:02,260 --> 00:25:03,700 Do any of you guys have her number 591 00:25:03,700 --> 00:25:05,140 or an address or something? 592 00:25:05,140 --> 00:25:07,540 Sure, just get a hold of me after the game, all right? 593 00:25:07,540 --> 00:25:09,340 Good luck, buddy. 594 00:25:11,420 --> 00:25:12,740 6:00 in the morning? 595 00:25:12,740 --> 00:25:15,860 Every morning like clockwork. 596 00:25:15,860 --> 00:25:17,300 Thanks. 597 00:25:19,180 --> 00:25:20,620 Excuse me, ma'am. 598 00:25:20,620 --> 00:25:21,580 The tables are filling, 599 00:25:21,580 --> 00:25:24,700 so do you mind if this gentleman joins you? 600 00:25:24,700 --> 00:25:26,500 How nice. 601 00:25:34,740 --> 00:25:36,740 And how are you this fine evening? 602 00:25:36,740 --> 00:25:38,260 I'm nice. 603 00:25:38,260 --> 00:25:38,980 And you? 604 00:25:38,980 --> 00:25:40,500 Well, fantastic 605 00:25:40,500 --> 00:25:42,420 now that I've had the opportunity 606 00:25:42,420 --> 00:25:45,780 to meet a lady as lovely as yourself. 607 00:25:46,260 --> 00:25:49,140 You are too nice. 608 00:25:49,140 --> 00:25:50,580 I'm Maxine. 609 00:25:50,580 --> 00:25:51,700 What's your name? 610 00:25:51,700 --> 00:25:53,220 I'm Joe. 611 00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:55,700 And I'm from Hyde Park, originally. 612 00:25:55,700 --> 00:25:58,180 Oh, that's nice. 613 00:25:58,180 --> 00:26:00,780 My cousin Myrna lives in Rogers Park. 614 00:26:00,780 --> 00:26:01,980 Really? 615 00:26:02,220 --> 00:26:03,740 It's very nice. 616 00:26:06,140 --> 00:26:08,060 You know... 617 00:26:08,540 --> 00:26:11,340 you are very nice-looking. 618 00:26:11,820 --> 00:26:13,140 Thank you. 619 00:26:15,380 --> 00:26:16,820 I'm Maxine. 620 00:26:16,940 --> 00:26:19,500 What's your name? 621 00:26:20,020 --> 00:26:20,980 I told you. 622 00:26:20,980 --> 00:26:22,220 It's Joe. 623 00:26:22,220 --> 00:26:24,500 Where are you from, Joe? 624 00:26:24,900 --> 00:26:25,940 Hyde Park. 625 00:26:26,340 --> 00:26:27,620 Oh, that's nice. 626 00:26:27,620 --> 00:26:30,300 My cousin Myrna lives in Rogers Park. 627 00:26:38,820 --> 00:26:40,220 Good morning, ma'am. 628 00:27:14,980 --> 00:27:16,900 I'm sorry, dear. 629 00:27:16,900 --> 00:27:18,380 I just can't do it. 630 00:27:18,780 --> 00:27:22,420 I'm... I'm just too old. 631 00:27:22,420 --> 00:27:27,100 I know I promised you, and I'm sorry. 632 00:27:27,100 --> 00:27:28,540 I'm so sorry. 633 00:27:29,220 --> 00:27:30,340 Grandpa? 634 00:27:30,900 --> 00:27:32,620 Grandpa? 635 00:27:32,820 --> 00:27:34,740 Hey. 636 00:27:34,740 --> 00:27:37,620 This is my home, you can't just break in here, David. 637 00:27:37,620 --> 00:27:39,060 Actually, I own the place, 638 00:27:39,060 --> 00:27:41,140 so, technically, it's my home. 639 00:27:41,140 --> 00:27:42,580 And what did you expect me to do 640 00:27:42,580 --> 00:27:46,660 when you leave a message on my machine saying good-bye? 641 00:27:46,660 --> 00:27:48,580 I can't do it, David. 642 00:27:48,580 --> 00:27:50,100 I can't take it anymore. 643 00:27:50,100 --> 00:27:51,140 I'm done. 644 00:27:51,620 --> 00:27:53,980 You're not done, okay? 645 00:27:53,980 --> 00:27:55,740 You're just afraid of getting hurt. 646 00:27:55,740 --> 00:27:58,180 You're damn right I'm afraid of getting hurt. 647 00:27:58,180 --> 00:28:00,580 Getting hurt hurts. 648 00:28:00,580 --> 00:28:03,460 I'd rather feel lonely than to feel this way. 649 00:28:03,460 --> 00:28:04,580 It's just not worth it. 650 00:28:04,580 --> 00:28:05,940 No, it is worth it. 651 00:28:05,940 --> 00:28:07,580 No, it's not, not for me. 652 00:28:08,140 --> 00:28:10,540 You just need to get more in your element, okay? 653 00:28:10,540 --> 00:28:12,940 Ditch that old brown suit 654 00:28:12,940 --> 00:28:14,860 that I know you're wearing, 655 00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:16,780 go and shop for some new clothes. 656 00:28:16,780 --> 00:28:18,700 You know, get a little more casual. 657 00:28:18,700 --> 00:28:21,700 And then, find the right place to look for the ladies. 658 00:28:25,620 --> 00:28:27,900 Will you help me then, David? 659 00:28:27,900 --> 00:28:29,500 Please? 660 00:28:36,100 --> 00:28:37,460 Look at you. 661 00:28:37,460 --> 00:28:39,380 Grandpa, you the man. 662 00:28:39,380 --> 00:28:40,340 You a player now. 663 00:28:40,820 --> 00:28:43,220 You lookin' sick, you lookin' dope. 664 00:28:43,220 --> 00:28:46,340 Why the hell would you dress me like a dope? 665 00:28:46,340 --> 00:28:50,660 All right, so you see anybody interesting? 666 00:28:53,700 --> 00:28:55,380 What about her? 667 00:28:56,580 --> 00:28:59,700 Isn't she a bit... large for you? 668 00:29:00,180 --> 00:29:02,860 Not the brunette, the blond. 669 00:29:04,300 --> 00:29:05,700 Oh, uh, I think the blond might be 670 00:29:05,700 --> 00:29:08,100 a little advanced for you, Hef. 671 00:29:08,100 --> 00:29:09,060 Why don't we try and find someone 672 00:29:09,540 --> 00:29:11,460 a bit more your own age? 673 00:29:13,740 --> 00:29:14,980 How about her? 674 00:29:25,260 --> 00:29:27,180 Uh... 675 00:29:27,180 --> 00:29:30,060 Another rose for Rose. 676 00:29:31,980 --> 00:29:33,900 Hey! 677 00:29:33,900 --> 00:29:35,820 You stole that rose. 678 00:29:35,820 --> 00:29:37,740 You could go to jail for that. 679 00:29:37,740 --> 00:29:41,100 Well, that's a risk I'm willing to take. 680 00:29:41,100 --> 00:29:42,540 That mean you won't accept it? 681 00:29:42,540 --> 00:29:44,460 Well, I just worry about what will happen to us 682 00:29:44,940 --> 00:29:46,860 when the police come. 683 00:29:46,860 --> 00:29:48,780 Well, we'll fight 'em off 684 00:29:48,780 --> 00:29:50,700 like Bonnie and Clyde. 685 00:29:53,100 --> 00:29:55,500 Bonnie and Clyde? 686 00:29:55,500 --> 00:29:56,940 That's a deal. 687 00:29:58,860 --> 00:30:01,260 Oh, listen, I never got your name when we first met. 688 00:30:01,260 --> 00:30:03,180 It's Joe, 689 00:30:03,660 --> 00:30:06,540 and I'm delighted to meet you again. 690 00:30:06,540 --> 00:30:09,420 Nice to meet you, too. 691 00:30:09,420 --> 00:30:11,340 Well... 692 00:30:11,820 --> 00:30:13,260 Please excuse me. 693 00:30:13,740 --> 00:30:15,660 Have a beautiful day. 694 00:30:20,180 --> 00:30:21,620 She's got a boyfriend. 695 00:30:22,100 --> 00:30:23,100 I noticed. 696 00:30:23,100 --> 00:30:24,420 Thought I was gonna have to step in and break up 697 00:30:24,420 --> 00:30:25,660 a fight for a second there. 698 00:30:25,660 --> 00:30:27,020 Whew! 699 00:30:27,020 --> 00:30:29,500 All right, come on, shake it off. 700 00:30:29,980 --> 00:30:31,420 How about her? 701 00:30:31,420 --> 00:30:33,220 Down and up. 702 00:30:33,420 --> 00:30:34,780 And up. 703 00:30:34,780 --> 00:30:36,300 Good, good, good. 704 00:30:36,300 --> 00:30:38,220 Okay, um... 705 00:30:38,220 --> 00:30:39,500 All right, listen. 706 00:30:39,500 --> 00:30:40,780 The delt machine's next on her circuit, 707 00:30:41,020 --> 00:30:42,660 so get over there and do just like we planned. 708 00:30:42,660 --> 00:30:44,940 The wh... wh... what machine? 709 00:30:44,940 --> 00:30:46,500 Next to the rhomboid machine. 710 00:30:46,500 --> 00:30:47,300 What? 711 00:30:47,300 --> 00:30:49,740 Just go, go over there. 712 00:30:59,620 --> 00:31:01,060 All right, Edna, that was awesome. 713 00:31:01,060 --> 00:31:02,980 Oh, thanks. You rock. 714 00:31:02,980 --> 00:31:04,060 There's somebody on the delt machine, 715 00:31:04,060 --> 00:31:05,020 so I'm just gonna grab another cup 716 00:31:05,500 --> 00:31:07,860 and I'll meet you at the bike, okay? 717 00:31:13,580 --> 00:31:15,420 - Hey! - So sorry. 718 00:31:18,180 --> 00:31:19,740 I'm so sorry. 719 00:31:19,740 --> 00:31:21,260 You're... 720 00:31:21,740 --> 00:31:24,620 It's all right, I'll live. 721 00:31:24,620 --> 00:31:26,820 I'm Joe. 722 00:31:26,820 --> 00:31:28,500 Hey, Joe, I'm Edna. 723 00:31:32,900 --> 00:31:34,140 How late? 724 00:31:34,140 --> 00:31:37,020 Really late. 725 00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:39,420 All right, what night does she go? 726 00:31:39,420 --> 00:31:40,860 Don't know. 727 00:31:40,860 --> 00:31:44,220 Depends on when she runs out of clothes, I suppose. 728 00:32:03,620 --> 00:32:06,020 Very dirty clothes. 729 00:32:06,500 --> 00:32:07,940 Bloodstains. 730 00:32:12,380 --> 00:32:13,340 Call me. 731 00:32:13,340 --> 00:32:14,660 Ugh. 732 00:32:20,260 --> 00:32:21,620 You're embarrassing me, David. 733 00:32:22,180 --> 00:32:23,140 What the... 734 00:32:23,140 --> 00:32:25,540 I want you to get out there and sell me some cars. 735 00:32:28,900 --> 00:32:30,100 Hey there. 736 00:32:34,020 --> 00:32:35,460 What's this? 737 00:32:35,460 --> 00:32:37,860 Uh, our laundry. 738 00:32:37,860 --> 00:32:39,300 Carrie figured you might as well be productive 739 00:32:39,300 --> 00:32:41,700 while you're stalking your woman at the Laundromat. 740 00:32:41,700 --> 00:32:44,100 Oh, and, uh, make sure you wash Carrie's stuff 741 00:32:44,100 --> 00:32:45,980 on the delicate cycle. 742 00:33:00,180 --> 00:33:01,980 Excuse me? 743 00:33:02,580 --> 00:33:04,020 Excuse me? 744 00:33:05,940 --> 00:33:07,180 Uh, hi there. 745 00:33:07,180 --> 00:33:09,180 Um, I think your wash is done. 746 00:33:12,020 --> 00:33:13,340 Thanks, Julie. 747 00:33:32,060 --> 00:33:33,940 Nice bra. 748 00:33:33,940 --> 00:33:34,900 Excuse me? 749 00:33:34,900 --> 00:33:36,420 Your bra, I like it. 750 00:33:36,420 --> 00:33:37,340 It's very sexy. 751 00:33:37,340 --> 00:33:39,340 Oh, no, no, this... I... I... 752 00:33:39,340 --> 00:33:40,940 There's no explanation necessary. 753 00:33:40,940 --> 00:33:43,940 I'll just let my imagination run wild. 754 00:33:43,940 --> 00:33:45,820 It's my girlfriend's. 755 00:33:46,300 --> 00:33:47,820 I'm sure it is. 756 00:33:51,580 --> 00:33:53,980 I was beginning to think I was the only late-night washer. 757 00:33:54,460 --> 00:33:55,500 No. 758 00:33:55,500 --> 00:33:57,420 You know, there's fewer people. 759 00:33:57,420 --> 00:33:58,820 No waiting for machines. 760 00:33:58,820 --> 00:34:00,260 No one finds out you're a cross-dresser. 761 00:34:00,740 --> 00:34:02,060 That too. 762 00:34:04,340 --> 00:34:06,060 I'm David. 763 00:34:06,060 --> 00:34:07,020 Hi, David. 764 00:34:07,020 --> 00:34:09,300 It's nice to meet you. 765 00:34:13,060 --> 00:34:15,940 Uh, custom dictates this is where you jump in 766 00:34:15,940 --> 00:34:18,220 and you tell me your name. 767 00:34:18,220 --> 00:34:21,060 But somehow you already know my name. 768 00:34:21,540 --> 00:34:24,300 When I woke you up, you said, "Thanks, Julie". 769 00:34:24,300 --> 00:34:25,740 Julie. 770 00:34:25,740 --> 00:34:27,180 Yeah, of course. 771 00:34:27,180 --> 00:34:29,580 No, I... yeah, when I, um... 772 00:34:29,580 --> 00:34:32,620 Yeah, no, actually now, we have met before. 773 00:34:33,180 --> 00:34:34,140 Really? 774 00:34:34,140 --> 00:34:35,740 Where? 775 00:34:35,740 --> 00:34:38,860 I'm a little hurt you don't remember. 776 00:34:38,860 --> 00:34:40,300 That's right. 777 00:34:40,300 --> 00:34:41,740 Oh, my God, silly. 778 00:34:41,740 --> 00:34:44,140 We met at Victoria's Secret when you were buying 779 00:34:44,140 --> 00:34:45,540 that beautiful bra. 780 00:34:45,540 --> 00:34:47,540 Actually I buy my lingerie mail-order. 781 00:34:47,540 --> 00:34:48,780 It's more discreet that way. 782 00:34:48,780 --> 00:34:51,260 Smart. 783 00:34:51,260 --> 00:34:55,220 So... where have we met? 784 00:34:55,220 --> 00:34:58,180 Football a couple weeks ago? 785 00:34:58,180 --> 00:34:59,620 That's right. 786 00:34:59,620 --> 00:35:04,420 You were Mr. Trivial Pursuit, trying to stump me. 787 00:35:04,420 --> 00:35:07,980 Well, um, it's nice to meet you, David. 788 00:35:07,980 --> 00:35:09,900 Nice to meet you, Julie. 789 00:35:13,660 --> 00:35:15,100 Boxers or briefs? 790 00:35:15,100 --> 00:35:16,060 Um... 791 00:35:16,060 --> 00:35:17,020 Oh, I forgot. 792 00:35:17,020 --> 00:35:18,460 It's panties. 793 00:35:20,380 --> 00:35:21,700 Boxer-briefs. 794 00:35:21,700 --> 00:35:22,500 You? 795 00:35:22,500 --> 00:35:24,660 Actually, um, right now, I'm commando. 796 00:35:24,660 --> 00:35:27,020 Wow, impressive. 797 00:35:27,020 --> 00:35:28,420 I know. 798 00:35:28,420 --> 00:35:30,940 All right, um, Ernie or Bert? 799 00:35:30,940 --> 00:35:32,460 Ernie. 800 00:35:32,460 --> 00:35:35,420 I never really had a thing for long, yellow, oval heads. 801 00:35:35,420 --> 00:35:37,420 I see, you're partial to the squashed, 802 00:35:37,420 --> 00:35:38,860 orange flat heads. 803 00:35:39,420 --> 00:35:40,380 Uh-huh, yeah. 804 00:35:40,380 --> 00:35:41,820 Oh, me too. 805 00:35:41,820 --> 00:35:42,780 Snickers or Milky way? 806 00:35:43,260 --> 00:35:45,180 Oh, neither. 807 00:35:45,180 --> 00:35:47,140 The Curly Wurly. 808 00:35:47,620 --> 00:35:49,060 It's the most amazing candy. 809 00:35:49,060 --> 00:35:50,500 I have to import it from... 810 00:35:50,500 --> 00:35:52,540 - England. - England. 811 00:35:57,180 --> 00:35:59,020 Wow. 812 00:35:59,020 --> 00:36:01,500 What are the chances? 813 00:36:01,500 --> 00:36:03,420 Interesting. 814 00:36:05,260 --> 00:36:06,740 Okay. 815 00:36:06,740 --> 00:36:08,660 Guess it's time to bring out the big guns. 816 00:36:08,660 --> 00:36:10,580 Shoot. 817 00:36:10,580 --> 00:36:11,540 Top or bottom? 818 00:36:11,540 --> 00:36:13,940 Well, you weren't kidding. 819 00:36:13,940 --> 00:36:16,340 Um, top. 820 00:36:16,340 --> 00:36:17,780 You? 821 00:36:17,780 --> 00:36:18,940 Bottom. 822 00:36:18,940 --> 00:36:21,060 Hmm... 823 00:36:21,060 --> 00:36:22,500 Yeah, I always, always start 824 00:36:22,500 --> 00:36:25,420 brushing my teeth on the bottom. 825 00:36:25,420 --> 00:36:26,860 Your teeth? 826 00:36:26,860 --> 00:36:28,660 What did you think I was talking about? 827 00:36:28,660 --> 00:36:31,620 Oh, my gosh, that is terrible. 828 00:36:31,620 --> 00:36:33,060 What kind of girl do you think I am? 829 00:36:33,060 --> 00:36:35,460 Oh, come on, that's not fair. 830 00:36:35,460 --> 00:36:37,740 Who said anything about playing fair? 831 00:36:37,740 --> 00:36:39,580 I'm gonna go to the bathroom. 832 00:36:39,580 --> 00:36:41,020 Touche. 833 00:37:11,420 --> 00:37:12,860 Aah! 834 00:37:36,740 --> 00:37:39,140 Oh, good, the dryers are done. 835 00:37:39,140 --> 00:37:40,980 Oh, perfect. 836 00:37:44,900 --> 00:37:45,860 That's weird. 837 00:37:45,860 --> 00:37:47,300 My clothes are still wet. 838 00:37:47,780 --> 00:37:49,700 Weird, mine, too. 839 00:37:49,700 --> 00:37:53,060 Ah, I hate these machines. 840 00:37:53,540 --> 00:37:55,940 I guess we'll have to run 'em again. 841 00:37:56,420 --> 00:37:57,860 Oh, well. 842 00:38:01,100 --> 00:38:02,620 I think being a graphic designer 843 00:38:02,620 --> 00:38:04,540 helps me to be more creative. 844 00:38:04,540 --> 00:38:06,460 It sounds like a really cool, rewarding job. 845 00:38:06,940 --> 00:38:07,900 I'm jealous. 846 00:38:08,380 --> 00:38:10,780 Well, I'm sure being a car salesman's pretty rewarding. 847 00:38:10,780 --> 00:38:11,740 I mean, I'm sure you've helped a lot of people 848 00:38:12,220 --> 00:38:13,660 buy their first car 849 00:38:13,660 --> 00:38:15,580 and given them a huge sense of independence. 850 00:38:15,580 --> 00:38:16,900 Oh, it's not like that. 851 00:38:17,100 --> 00:38:18,620 Why not? 852 00:38:18,620 --> 00:38:20,060 It's a big game. 853 00:38:20,540 --> 00:38:21,980 I read people's insecurities, 854 00:38:21,980 --> 00:38:23,420 I make them think they're getting something 855 00:38:23,420 --> 00:38:24,380 they don't deserve, 856 00:38:24,860 --> 00:38:27,540 and then I convince them to spend more than they should. 857 00:38:27,540 --> 00:38:30,420 Can't you just sell them a car they can afford? 858 00:38:30,420 --> 00:38:31,860 I could, and then my dad would fire me. 859 00:38:31,860 --> 00:38:33,460 Ahh. 860 00:38:33,460 --> 00:38:35,140 Yeah. 861 00:38:35,140 --> 00:38:38,380 Well, isn't there any other job you'd find rewarding? 862 00:38:38,380 --> 00:38:39,820 Probably. 863 00:38:39,820 --> 00:38:41,740 I was actually studying to get my masters 864 00:38:41,740 --> 00:38:43,660 in health-care administration, 865 00:38:43,660 --> 00:38:44,620 and then right before I finished, 866 00:38:44,620 --> 00:38:46,060 my grandmother died, 867 00:38:46,060 --> 00:38:47,980 and my grandpa sort of fell apart, 868 00:38:47,980 --> 00:38:50,780 so I had to buy him a condo in a retirement community. 869 00:38:50,780 --> 00:38:52,220 Oh, yeah, I know how that is. 870 00:38:52,700 --> 00:38:54,140 We had to put my grandma in a retirement community 871 00:38:54,140 --> 00:38:56,060 for the same reason. 872 00:38:56,060 --> 00:38:57,940 She just couldn't take the isolation. 873 00:38:57,940 --> 00:38:59,380 Yeah. 874 00:38:59,380 --> 00:39:00,340 Anyway, to afford the mortgage, 875 00:39:00,340 --> 00:39:02,100 I had to go back to selling cars with my dad. 876 00:39:02,660 --> 00:39:05,540 Well, why didn't your dad just pay for it? 877 00:39:05,540 --> 00:39:08,420 Well, my dad left my mom and me when I was eight, 878 00:39:08,420 --> 00:39:09,380 right before she died, 879 00:39:09,380 --> 00:39:12,260 so my grandpa and him don't get along all that well. 880 00:39:12,260 --> 00:39:14,180 Or at all. 881 00:39:14,180 --> 00:39:15,620 But when I needed the money, 882 00:39:15,620 --> 00:39:17,540 my dad really came through for me with the job. 883 00:39:18,100 --> 00:39:19,540 How'd your grandfather like that? 884 00:39:20,020 --> 00:39:21,460 Well, he got all upset because he thinks my dad's 885 00:39:21,460 --> 00:39:22,900 a bad influence on me. 886 00:39:22,900 --> 00:39:24,340 He's probably right. 887 00:39:24,820 --> 00:39:28,180 And we stopped talking for a while. 888 00:39:28,180 --> 00:39:32,500 I have been looking for these for weeks. 889 00:39:32,980 --> 00:39:34,420 They're, uh, gift certificates 890 00:39:34,420 --> 00:39:37,020 to my girlfriend's favorite restaurant. 891 00:39:37,020 --> 00:39:39,500 Unbelievable. 892 00:39:39,980 --> 00:39:41,420 They expire on Sunday 893 00:39:41,420 --> 00:39:42,860 and she's out of town until Monday. 894 00:39:42,860 --> 00:39:45,980 That sucks. 895 00:39:45,980 --> 00:39:48,900 Hey, you know what? 896 00:39:48,900 --> 00:39:50,340 She's not gonna use them. 897 00:39:50,340 --> 00:39:52,740 There's no use letting them go to waste. 898 00:39:52,740 --> 00:39:55,660 Would you like to go? 899 00:39:55,660 --> 00:39:58,300 That's so nice of you to offer. 900 00:39:58,300 --> 00:39:59,740 Just make sure you take somebody 901 00:39:59,740 --> 00:40:01,660 who really appreciates good food. 902 00:40:05,540 --> 00:40:08,420 You know... 903 00:40:08,420 --> 00:40:11,300 Thanks, David. 904 00:40:11,300 --> 00:40:14,020 It's really nice of you. 905 00:40:14,020 --> 00:40:16,420 Well, that's it for me. 906 00:40:29,460 --> 00:40:32,820 Well, David, it was nice to meet you. 907 00:40:32,820 --> 00:40:34,420 Again. 908 00:40:34,420 --> 00:40:36,300 It was nice to meet you. 909 00:40:40,620 --> 00:40:42,100 Hey, uh, Julie. 910 00:40:48,340 --> 00:40:50,180 Yeah? 911 00:40:52,180 --> 00:40:54,660 Have a good night. 912 00:40:54,660 --> 00:40:56,100 Good night. 913 00:41:05,340 --> 00:41:08,660 So did you come up with a reason to see her again? 914 00:41:08,660 --> 00:41:12,500 I found out her favorite movie star is Rita Hayworth. 915 00:41:12,500 --> 00:41:14,900 I already talked to the girl that plans movie night. 916 00:41:14,900 --> 00:41:16,820 You're a genius. 917 00:41:16,820 --> 00:41:19,500 As soon as the movie arrives, I'm gonna call Edna... 918 00:41:19,580 --> 00:41:20,260 No! 919 00:41:20,260 --> 00:41:21,780 No, Grandpa. 920 00:41:22,060 --> 00:41:25,140 You have to wait until she calls you. 921 00:41:25,140 --> 00:41:26,540 Take it from the genius. 922 00:41:26,540 --> 00:41:27,980 Well, it sounds like the genius 923 00:41:27,980 --> 00:41:30,860 just stuck his big, fat head up his ass. 924 00:41:30,860 --> 00:41:33,260 In my day, no respectable woman 925 00:41:33,260 --> 00:41:35,220 would ever call a man, ever. 926 00:41:35,300 --> 00:41:37,700 Well, it isn't your day anymore. 927 00:41:37,700 --> 00:41:40,580 The rules of the game have changed. 928 00:41:40,580 --> 00:41:42,020 Oh, applesauce. 929 00:41:42,020 --> 00:41:42,980 You're all wet. 930 00:41:42,980 --> 00:41:44,900 Trust me, Grandpa, 931 00:41:44,900 --> 00:41:46,340 I know what I'm doing. 932 00:41:46,340 --> 00:41:49,740 I finally met that girl that I've been after. 933 00:41:49,740 --> 00:41:51,660 Did you find out her favorite movie star? 934 00:41:51,660 --> 00:41:54,100 That one works like a charm. 935 00:41:54,100 --> 00:41:56,980 No, I stole her panties. 936 00:41:59,860 --> 00:42:01,780 You what? 937 00:42:01,780 --> 00:42:04,180 What kind of sicko move is that? 938 00:42:04,180 --> 00:42:06,100 Is that how I raised you? 939 00:42:06,100 --> 00:42:08,500 It was a fair trade. 940 00:42:08,500 --> 00:42:11,860 I planted a pair of jeans in her laundry. 941 00:42:11,860 --> 00:42:13,780 Oh... 942 00:42:14,260 --> 00:42:16,660 so now you're wearing the panties 943 00:42:16,660 --> 00:42:19,540 and she's wearing the pants. 944 00:42:19,540 --> 00:42:21,460 Oh, great. 945 00:42:32,940 --> 00:42:34,860 Stupid, dumb, idiot plan. 946 00:42:42,620 --> 00:42:44,540 - How were your steaks? - Oh, delicious, thanks. 947 00:42:44,540 --> 00:42:45,500 Could we pay with these? 948 00:42:45,500 --> 00:42:47,460 Of course. 949 00:43:14,060 --> 00:43:15,500 Enough already. 950 00:43:15,500 --> 00:43:18,380 I haven't left my damn room in three days. 951 00:43:28,940 --> 00:43:29,900 Hello. 952 00:43:30,380 --> 00:43:32,260 Uh, hi, Edna. 953 00:43:32,260 --> 00:43:33,220 It's Joe. 954 00:43:33,220 --> 00:43:34,180 Hello, Joe. 955 00:43:34,180 --> 00:43:35,620 I'm glad you caught me. 956 00:43:35,620 --> 00:43:38,020 Um, I was just running out the door 957 00:43:38,020 --> 00:43:40,020 to the store for some milk. 958 00:43:40,020 --> 00:43:41,460 Well, uh... 959 00:43:41,460 --> 00:43:43,860 I... I... I see that... that "Gilda" 960 00:43:44,340 --> 00:43:46,020 is playing on Monday, 961 00:43:46,020 --> 00:43:48,180 and I know that Rita Hayworth is your favorite, 962 00:43:48,660 --> 00:43:49,940 and I wondered if, uh, 963 00:43:49,940 --> 00:43:52,900 well, it might be good 964 00:43:52,900 --> 00:43:55,300 if, uh, if you wanted to, to see... 965 00:43:55,300 --> 00:43:58,180 see that talkie with me, if you wanted to. 966 00:43:58,180 --> 00:44:00,940 It's at 2:00 on Monday. 967 00:44:00,940 --> 00:44:03,420 Well, let me check my calendar. 968 00:44:15,940 --> 00:44:18,500 Well, Joe, um... 969 00:44:18,500 --> 00:44:20,980 I think I'm free. 970 00:44:20,980 --> 00:44:23,380 Oh! 971 00:44:23,380 --> 00:44:24,820 I'll see you then. 972 00:44:24,820 --> 00:44:26,260 Okey-dokey. 973 00:44:48,820 --> 00:44:50,740 Your package is here. 974 00:44:58,980 --> 00:45:00,500 Well, hello, Mr. Trivia. 975 00:45:01,060 --> 00:45:04,700 I have something that I think belongs to you. 976 00:45:04,700 --> 00:45:06,140 Wow. 977 00:45:06,140 --> 00:45:07,100 You cross-dressing men 978 00:45:07,100 --> 00:45:08,820 just can't help yourselves, can you? 979 00:45:08,820 --> 00:45:10,820 Yeah, they were cute, but they didn't fit. 980 00:45:10,820 --> 00:45:13,700 So... hey, did you find 981 00:45:13,700 --> 00:45:17,140 a pair of my girlfriend's jeans in your laundry? 982 00:45:17,620 --> 00:45:19,060 Mm-mm, no. 983 00:45:21,300 --> 00:45:22,740 - You didn't? - Mm-mm. 984 00:45:23,220 --> 00:45:24,460 Are you sure? 985 00:45:24,460 --> 00:45:26,580 They were, uh, blue with red flowers on them? 986 00:45:27,060 --> 00:45:28,500 No, but if they turn up, I'll let you know. 987 00:45:28,500 --> 00:45:30,140 Sorry, I just got a call. 988 00:45:30,140 --> 00:45:32,140 I've got to go into work today, Dollface. 989 00:45:32,140 --> 00:45:33,300 I'm off like a bride's nightie. 990 00:45:33,300 --> 00:45:34,820 Oh. 991 00:45:34,820 --> 00:45:37,140 David, this is my boyfriend, Paul. 992 00:45:37,140 --> 00:45:37,940 Paul, this is David. 993 00:45:37,940 --> 00:45:39,460 David is the only other person in the city 994 00:45:39,460 --> 00:45:41,380 who does his laundry at night. 995 00:45:41,380 --> 00:45:43,300 Oh, David! 996 00:45:43,620 --> 00:45:46,500 Yes, it's an absolute pleasure to make your acquaintance. 997 00:45:46,500 --> 00:45:48,500 Oh, and thanks dearly 998 00:45:48,500 --> 00:45:51,020 for the lovely prezzies of gift certificates. 999 00:45:51,580 --> 00:45:52,940 Charlie Trotter's 1000 00:45:52,940 --> 00:45:56,500 has an absolutely scrummy fish and chips indeed. 1001 00:45:56,500 --> 00:45:58,540 Glad you enjoyed them. 1002 00:45:58,540 --> 00:46:00,980 Well, I've got to run, you little minx. 1003 00:46:00,980 --> 00:46:02,060 I'll see you later tonight 1004 00:46:02,060 --> 00:46:04,540 for a little more crazy Muskrat love? 1005 00:46:04,540 --> 00:46:06,300 Okay, yeah. 1006 00:46:06,300 --> 00:46:07,860 Mmm! 1007 00:46:11,300 --> 00:46:12,820 Uh, well, I guess that means 1008 00:46:13,300 --> 00:46:15,220 you'll have to entertain me today. 1009 00:46:15,220 --> 00:46:16,500 Are you free? 1010 00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:18,900 Um, yeah. 1011 00:46:18,900 --> 00:46:19,860 All right, cool. 1012 00:46:19,860 --> 00:46:21,780 I'm... I'm just gonna change, and I'll be right out. 1013 00:46:22,260 --> 00:46:24,180 Okay. 1014 00:46:35,060 --> 00:46:38,420 Thank you for inviting me to the movie, Joe. 1015 00:46:38,420 --> 00:46:40,820 I had a lovely time. 1016 00:46:40,820 --> 00:46:43,700 It's my pleasure. 1017 00:46:43,700 --> 00:46:45,620 I love a good talkie. 1018 00:46:45,620 --> 00:46:46,580 Oh, me too. 1019 00:46:47,060 --> 00:46:48,500 Rita Hayworth was wonderful in this. 1020 00:46:48,980 --> 00:46:49,940 Yes. 1021 00:46:49,940 --> 00:46:51,380 Yes, she was. 1022 00:46:55,700 --> 00:46:58,100 You know... 1023 00:46:58,100 --> 00:47:01,940 uh, Edna... I, uh... 1024 00:47:02,420 --> 00:47:05,300 I... I... I like... 1025 00:47:05,300 --> 00:47:06,740 spending time with you. 1026 00:47:10,100 --> 00:47:12,980 I mean, I like... 1027 00:47:12,980 --> 00:47:16,820 well... you. 1028 00:47:16,820 --> 00:47:19,220 Oh, Joe, 1029 00:47:19,220 --> 00:47:22,100 I like you too, very much. 1030 00:47:22,100 --> 00:47:24,020 - Oh. - Uh-huh. 1031 00:47:44,660 --> 00:47:45,820 No, wait a minute, wait a minute, 1032 00:47:46,300 --> 00:47:47,260 there's more, there's more. 1033 00:47:47,260 --> 00:47:49,180 Not... not only does she have a boyfriend, 1034 00:47:49,180 --> 00:47:51,100 but he's, like, 50 years old, 1035 00:47:51,580 --> 00:47:53,980 with gray hair, lousy teeth, 1036 00:47:53,980 --> 00:47:55,900 nasty BO, and a bald spot. 1037 00:47:55,900 --> 00:47:57,340 - Are you serious? - I'm serious. 1038 00:47:57,340 --> 00:47:59,180 Ha-ha-ha-ha, very funny. 1039 00:47:59,180 --> 00:48:00,620 All right, enough. 1040 00:48:02,060 --> 00:48:02,940 So what's my strategy? 1041 00:48:03,500 --> 00:48:04,940 Ah, buddy-buddy all the way. 1042 00:48:04,940 --> 00:48:05,740 Yeah. 1043 00:48:06,300 --> 00:48:08,420 What the hell is buddy-buddy? 1044 00:48:08,420 --> 00:48:10,820 If Julie knows that David wants her, 1045 00:48:10,820 --> 00:48:13,220 she's gonna avoid him because she doesn't wanna feel like 1046 00:48:13,220 --> 00:48:14,180 she's cheating on her boyfriend. 1047 00:48:14,180 --> 00:48:16,460 But as her buddy, I'm not a threat, 1048 00:48:16,500 --> 00:48:17,980 so we get to spend quality time together. 1049 00:48:18,020 --> 00:48:20,140 Before she knows it, she's more attracted to me 1050 00:48:20,660 --> 00:48:21,580 than her boyfriend. 1051 00:48:21,620 --> 00:48:24,940 And that is the end of the story. 1052 00:48:24,980 --> 00:48:26,060 Uhh! 1053 00:48:26,060 --> 00:48:27,780 No, it's not! 1054 00:48:31,260 --> 00:48:32,980 David, you need to grow up. 1055 00:48:33,460 --> 00:48:36,460 Don't you realize that girls know when you're playing them? 1056 00:48:36,460 --> 00:48:38,020 Don't ask me how, but they do. 1057 00:48:38,500 --> 00:48:39,460 They know. 1058 00:48:39,460 --> 00:48:41,740 And you! 1059 00:48:41,740 --> 00:48:44,100 I am so fed up with your crap. 1060 00:48:44,100 --> 00:48:45,180 You're gonna have to decide 1061 00:48:45,220 --> 00:48:47,660 if you wanna be a divorced bachelor with him 1062 00:48:47,700 --> 00:48:49,580 or a husband to me. 1063 00:48:49,620 --> 00:48:51,180 All right? 1064 00:48:54,540 --> 00:48:56,940 What about making that Wednesday night laundry gig 1065 00:48:56,940 --> 00:48:58,380 a regular thing? 1066 00:48:58,380 --> 00:49:00,300 What, so after a big Tuesday night 1067 00:49:00,300 --> 00:49:02,220 of wild muskrat love 1068 00:49:02,220 --> 00:49:03,660 with her antique British boyfriend, 1069 00:49:03,660 --> 00:49:06,540 I can help wash the evidence out of the sheets? 1070 00:49:06,540 --> 00:49:08,460 No, thank you. 1071 00:49:20,020 --> 00:49:21,340 - Hemorrhoids. - Ahh. 1072 00:49:21,380 --> 00:49:22,860 Preventing hemorrhoids. 1073 00:49:22,900 --> 00:49:26,220 It lowers the "G" forces on your tushie. 1074 00:49:26,740 --> 00:49:28,380 Joe taught me that. 1075 00:49:28,380 --> 00:49:32,540 So, um, what home do you guys live in? 1076 00:49:32,540 --> 00:49:35,260 Oh, we're in the Lakewood Retirement Community. 1077 00:49:35,300 --> 00:49:36,780 Are you serious? 1078 00:49:36,820 --> 00:49:38,220 My grandma lives there. 1079 00:49:38,260 --> 00:49:39,180 Oh. 1080 00:49:39,220 --> 00:49:41,100 Yeah, I'm... I'm always going to visit her. 1081 00:49:41,140 --> 00:49:42,060 Really? 1082 00:49:42,260 --> 00:49:43,140 I didn't know that. 1083 00:49:43,340 --> 00:49:45,980 Yeah, her name's Rose. 1084 00:49:46,020 --> 00:49:47,900 I know her. 1085 00:49:47,940 --> 00:49:50,300 Now I see where you get your good looks. 1086 00:49:50,340 --> 00:49:52,380 We'll all have to get together some time. 1087 00:49:52,380 --> 00:49:54,780 That would be wonderful. 1088 00:49:54,820 --> 00:49:58,620 Um, David, did you know 1089 00:49:58,660 --> 00:50:01,020 that Joe is a wonderful kisser? 1090 00:50:04,220 --> 00:50:06,140 Um, no, Edna. 1091 00:50:06,620 --> 00:50:07,580 I did not know that. 1092 00:50:07,580 --> 00:50:09,500 Oh, yes. 1093 00:50:09,780 --> 00:50:11,740 Your grandmother taught him well. 1094 00:50:12,260 --> 00:50:15,020 I can't wait to find out what else she taught him. 1095 00:50:19,460 --> 00:50:21,340 So... 1096 00:50:21,380 --> 00:50:22,940 how long have you two been dating? 1097 00:50:25,860 --> 00:50:27,260 Oh, no, we're not dating. 1098 00:50:27,300 --> 00:50:28,700 No. 1099 00:50:28,740 --> 00:50:31,580 David, he's... he's like a brother to me. 1100 00:50:36,580 --> 00:50:38,540 A brother? 1101 00:50:38,580 --> 00:50:40,460 You mean, like a brother from Kentucky, right? 1102 00:50:40,980 --> 00:50:42,380 That way, you guys could fool around, right? 1103 00:50:42,420 --> 00:50:44,300 Ahh! 1104 00:50:44,340 --> 00:50:45,740 Why are you getting yourself all worked up 1105 00:50:45,780 --> 00:50:47,180 - over this one girl? - Why? 1106 00:50:47,700 --> 00:50:48,620 I don't know, I don't know. 1107 00:50:49,140 --> 00:50:52,460 Because she's... she's cute and... 1108 00:50:52,500 --> 00:50:55,820 and I kind of like her, and I'm blowing it! 1109 00:50:55,860 --> 00:50:58,220 Would you just please tell her how you feel? 1110 00:50:58,260 --> 00:51:00,620 - Trust me on this one. - No! 1111 00:51:00,660 --> 00:51:04,460 No, what I gotta do is turn things up a notch. 1112 00:51:04,980 --> 00:51:07,340 Rob, are you interested in 1113 00:51:07,380 --> 00:51:10,140 playing a little poker tonight? 1114 00:51:10,180 --> 00:51:11,100 No. 1115 00:51:11,140 --> 00:51:13,020 No, I can't. 1116 00:51:13,060 --> 00:51:14,940 Carrie and I are spending some 1117 00:51:14,980 --> 00:51:17,820 husband-and-wife time together. 1118 00:51:17,820 --> 00:51:20,220 Playing Scrabble. 1119 00:51:20,700 --> 00:51:22,540 Please tell me "Scrabble" is code for having sex. 1120 00:51:25,340 --> 00:51:27,260 Actually, it's just Scrabble. 1121 00:51:29,580 --> 00:51:31,100 I got the girl to show another 1122 00:51:31,100 --> 00:51:32,540 Rita Hayworth talkie tonight. 1123 00:51:32,540 --> 00:51:33,980 You interested? 1124 00:51:34,020 --> 00:51:35,420 Oh, let's just have dinner instead, Joe. 1125 00:51:35,940 --> 00:51:37,820 Is that okay? 1126 00:51:37,860 --> 00:51:38,780 Joe? 1127 00:51:38,820 --> 00:51:40,220 Rose. 1128 00:51:40,260 --> 00:51:42,300 Joe... Joe! 1129 00:51:42,300 --> 00:51:44,300 So nice to see you again. 1130 00:51:44,300 --> 00:51:46,220 Well, hello again. 1131 00:51:46,700 --> 00:51:48,620 I met your granddaughter the other day. 1132 00:51:48,620 --> 00:51:51,020 She and my grandson are close friends. 1133 00:51:51,020 --> 00:51:53,420 Like brother and sister, she said. 1134 00:51:53,420 --> 00:51:54,940 Well, if they're brother and sister, 1135 00:51:54,940 --> 00:51:57,900 then that should make us their grandparents. 1136 00:51:57,900 --> 00:52:00,300 I suppose it would! 1137 00:52:00,300 --> 00:52:03,260 Imagine, all this time we've had the same grandkids, 1138 00:52:03,260 --> 00:52:04,700 and we didn't know about it. 1139 00:52:04,700 --> 00:52:06,140 Imagine that. 1140 00:52:06,140 --> 00:52:07,660 Joe, we're going to be late. 1141 00:52:07,660 --> 00:52:08,620 Yes, we're late, too, Rose. 1142 00:52:09,100 --> 00:52:11,020 - Late for what? - Late for what? 1143 00:52:12,940 --> 00:52:15,820 I... I... I'll see you at the family reunion. 1144 00:52:15,820 --> 00:52:17,260 I'll bring the potato salad. 1145 00:52:17,260 --> 00:52:18,940 Okay. 1146 00:52:18,940 --> 00:52:20,940 You've been dating three weeks? 1147 00:52:20,940 --> 00:52:22,380 How come you never told me? 1148 00:52:22,380 --> 00:52:24,300 Ah, we just started getting serious 1149 00:52:24,300 --> 00:52:26,220 and I'm really into her. 1150 00:52:26,220 --> 00:52:28,140 Well, I'm sure she's into you, too. 1151 00:52:28,140 --> 00:52:29,100 I don't know. 1152 00:52:29,580 --> 00:52:31,020 You know, it's tough to tell. 1153 00:52:31,020 --> 00:52:32,940 Wait, you've never talked about it? 1154 00:52:34,860 --> 00:52:37,260 Oh. 1155 00:52:37,260 --> 00:52:38,700 Hey! 1156 00:52:38,700 --> 00:52:40,140 Amanda, come here. 1157 00:52:40,140 --> 00:52:41,580 David, she's beautiful, she could be a model. 1158 00:52:42,060 --> 00:52:43,020 I know, she is a model. 1159 00:52:43,020 --> 00:52:45,420 - Hey. - Hi. 1160 00:52:45,900 --> 00:52:48,780 Amanda, this is, uh, Julie. 1161 00:52:48,780 --> 00:52:50,220 Oh. 1162 00:52:52,140 --> 00:52:53,100 It's so nice to meet you, Julie. 1163 00:52:53,100 --> 00:52:55,980 I've heard such nice things about you. 1164 00:52:56,460 --> 00:52:57,420 How are you? 1165 00:52:57,420 --> 00:52:59,020 - Hmm, good, I'm good. - Good. 1166 00:53:00,540 --> 00:53:02,860 I hope you're hungry. 1167 00:53:02,860 --> 00:53:05,740 Edna's tired of kissing me. 1168 00:53:05,740 --> 00:53:08,620 Aw, I'm sorry, Grandpa. 1169 00:53:08,620 --> 00:53:10,060 I told you you shouldn't have laid it all 1170 00:53:10,060 --> 00:53:11,580 on the table like that. 1171 00:53:11,580 --> 00:53:15,020 You can't let them know your true feelings so soon. 1172 00:53:15,020 --> 00:53:17,420 Why does she say she doesn't wanna see you anymore? 1173 00:53:17,420 --> 00:53:20,220 She wants to see more of me. 1174 00:53:20,620 --> 00:53:21,340 Oh. 1175 00:53:21,340 --> 00:53:22,700 Well, what's the problem then? 1176 00:53:23,020 --> 00:53:25,980 She wants to see all of me! 1177 00:53:25,980 --> 00:53:29,900 She wants me to perform with her. 1178 00:53:29,900 --> 00:53:32,060 On stage, I hope. 1179 00:53:32,620 --> 00:53:33,820 In bed. 1180 00:53:33,820 --> 00:53:35,820 Well, does she know that 1181 00:53:35,820 --> 00:53:37,260 you can't... you know? 1182 00:53:37,260 --> 00:53:37,980 Are you kidding? 1183 00:53:38,540 --> 00:53:39,980 No way. 1184 00:53:39,980 --> 00:53:44,060 She assumes I'm a virile young man. 1185 00:53:44,060 --> 00:53:46,460 Are you sure she assumes that? 1186 00:53:46,460 --> 00:53:47,900 If she finds out the truth, 1187 00:53:47,900 --> 00:53:49,900 it'll get around the home in hours. 1188 00:53:49,900 --> 00:53:53,260 I'll be the laughingstock and I'll never find anybody. 1189 00:53:53,260 --> 00:53:56,620 I just wanted some companionship. 1190 00:53:56,620 --> 00:53:59,020 I can't believe this is happening. 1191 00:54:01,420 --> 00:54:02,380 I can't believe my grandpa's 1192 00:54:02,860 --> 00:54:04,300 getting more action than I am. 1193 00:54:08,380 --> 00:54:09,820 Mmm! 1194 00:54:09,820 --> 00:54:12,140 I broke up with Paul. 1195 00:54:12,620 --> 00:54:14,060 Oh, Jul, I'm so sorry. 1196 00:54:14,060 --> 00:54:15,500 How are you doing? 1197 00:54:15,500 --> 00:54:16,860 What happened? 1198 00:54:16,860 --> 00:54:19,260 Seeing you with Amanda really affected me. 1199 00:54:19,260 --> 00:54:20,700 It did? 1200 00:54:20,700 --> 00:54:23,100 Yeah, I just... you guys seemed so happy together 1201 00:54:23,100 --> 00:54:25,020 and there was so much passion. 1202 00:54:25,500 --> 00:54:26,940 I got a little jealous. 1203 00:54:26,940 --> 00:54:27,900 You did? 1204 00:54:28,380 --> 00:54:31,260 I realized there's no passion with me and Paul, 1205 00:54:31,260 --> 00:54:32,460 and I realized why. 1206 00:54:33,020 --> 00:54:35,020 Because he's 60? 1207 00:54:35,020 --> 00:54:37,020 No. 1208 00:54:37,020 --> 00:54:41,020 Because I think I'm interested in someone else. 1209 00:54:41,020 --> 00:54:41,980 Really? 1210 00:54:41,980 --> 00:54:43,420 Yeah. 1211 00:54:43,420 --> 00:54:46,540 He's funny and smart and cute. 1212 00:54:47,100 --> 00:54:48,540 But he just started seeing someone else, 1213 00:54:48,540 --> 00:54:51,820 so I don't know what to do. 1214 00:54:51,820 --> 00:54:53,980 Just tell him. 1215 00:54:54,460 --> 00:54:56,380 Really? 1216 00:54:56,380 --> 00:54:57,820 I don't know, it's complicated. 1217 00:54:58,300 --> 00:55:00,220 - There's... - What are you afraid of? 1218 00:55:00,700 --> 00:55:03,100 Just be honest with your feelings. 1219 00:55:03,100 --> 00:55:04,940 I'm sure he likes you. 1220 00:55:08,300 --> 00:55:11,180 David... you are the most 1221 00:55:11,660 --> 00:55:15,180 amazing friend a woman could ever ask for. 1222 00:55:15,180 --> 00:55:17,500 Yeah. 1223 00:55:17,500 --> 00:55:18,940 You're so right. 1224 00:55:18,940 --> 00:55:21,820 I'm gonna tell him. 1225 00:55:21,820 --> 00:55:23,980 As soon as I walk into work tomorrow, 1226 00:55:23,980 --> 00:55:25,740 - I'm just gonna tell him. - Whoa, work? 1227 00:55:26,220 --> 00:55:29,100 Yeah, he works in the media department. 1228 00:55:29,100 --> 00:55:30,060 Wait, wait, wait, wait. 1229 00:55:30,060 --> 00:55:33,260 So... oh, so he works with you? 1230 00:55:33,260 --> 00:55:34,780 Well, I told you it was complicated. 1231 00:55:34,780 --> 00:55:36,380 Do you think I shouldn't do it? 1232 00:55:36,860 --> 00:55:37,820 I don't know. 1233 00:55:37,820 --> 00:55:39,580 - Why are you asking me? - Why? 1234 00:55:39,580 --> 00:55:41,420 I saw you at the bar with Amanda 1235 00:55:41,420 --> 00:55:44,300 and those other women, you ladies' man, you. 1236 00:55:44,300 --> 00:55:47,100 Those girls said you were quite the player. 1237 00:55:47,100 --> 00:55:48,780 I'm a player? 1238 00:55:48,780 --> 00:55:51,020 No, I don't mean it in a bad way. 1239 00:55:51,020 --> 00:55:53,420 That's why it's perfect we're friends. 1240 00:55:53,420 --> 00:55:54,940 'Cause now you can help me with this stuff. 1241 00:55:55,500 --> 00:55:56,940 Yeah. 1242 00:56:00,700 --> 00:56:02,140 She called me a player. 1243 00:56:02,140 --> 00:56:03,580 Ooh, some nerve. 1244 00:56:03,580 --> 00:56:05,020 I actually thought she was gonna break up 1245 00:56:05,020 --> 00:56:06,460 with that old fart to go out with me. 1246 00:56:06,460 --> 00:56:07,420 She's got issues, man. 1247 00:56:07,420 --> 00:56:08,860 This calls for action. 1248 00:56:08,860 --> 00:56:09,900 About time. 1249 00:56:09,900 --> 00:56:11,340 If she wants a player, she's gonna get one. 1250 00:56:11,820 --> 00:56:13,180 I'm gonna play her like a two-bit fiddle. 1251 00:56:13,180 --> 00:56:14,700 A what? 1252 00:56:14,700 --> 00:56:16,140 By next week, she'll be mine. 1253 00:56:16,140 --> 00:56:17,020 She won't even know what hit her. 1254 00:56:17,580 --> 00:56:19,260 Spoken like a true player. 1255 00:56:24,100 --> 00:56:24,780 A player. 1256 00:56:24,780 --> 00:56:26,300 Ha! 1257 00:56:26,300 --> 00:56:27,660 I'll show her a player. 1258 00:56:35,740 --> 00:56:38,620 Oh, Joe, you came! 1259 00:56:39,100 --> 00:56:40,540 Oh! 1260 00:56:40,540 --> 00:56:42,460 For a beautiful lady. 1261 00:56:44,860 --> 00:56:46,780 Oh, thank you. 1262 00:56:46,780 --> 00:56:48,700 Aww. 1263 00:56:48,700 --> 00:56:50,140 Just wonderful. 1264 00:56:52,700 --> 00:56:54,100 Who knew that there was a winery 1265 00:56:54,620 --> 00:56:55,980 an hour outside of the city? 1266 00:56:56,460 --> 00:56:57,900 I thought you had to go to Napa to get good wine. 1267 00:56:58,380 --> 00:57:00,780 You do, but if you want extraordinarily average wine, 1268 00:57:00,780 --> 00:57:02,020 you come here. 1269 00:57:11,180 --> 00:57:12,580 Thanks for inviting me. 1270 00:57:12,620 --> 00:57:14,500 I'm sorry Amanda couldn't come. 1271 00:57:14,540 --> 00:57:15,940 I certainly brought back 1272 00:57:15,980 --> 00:57:17,380 enough wine for her, didn't I? 1273 00:57:17,420 --> 00:57:18,340 Oh, and don't think I didn't see all those 1274 00:57:18,380 --> 00:57:19,780 candles in the trunk. 1275 00:57:20,300 --> 00:57:22,660 Planning a big night, are we? 1276 00:57:22,700 --> 00:57:23,620 Actually, we're having some issues. 1277 00:57:28,460 --> 00:57:29,380 What's wrong? 1278 00:57:29,420 --> 00:57:31,300 Oh, damn it! 1279 00:57:31,340 --> 00:57:32,980 - What? - We're out of gas. 1280 00:57:33,580 --> 00:57:34,980 Oh, no. 1281 00:57:35,020 --> 00:57:38,260 And... that's that. 1282 00:57:38,300 --> 00:57:40,100 Oh, God, now what are we gonna do? 1283 00:57:42,060 --> 00:57:44,900 Um, Edna? 1284 00:57:45,420 --> 00:57:48,260 I have something I have to tell you. 1285 00:57:48,300 --> 00:57:50,180 Let me freshen your glass first. 1286 00:57:52,620 --> 00:57:55,060 Edna, I don't know how to say this, 1287 00:57:55,100 --> 00:57:57,540 but... 1288 00:57:57,580 --> 00:58:00,780 I'm not as young as I used to be. 1289 00:58:00,780 --> 00:58:02,220 Really, Joe? 1290 00:58:02,220 --> 00:58:04,860 You look pretty spry to me. 1291 00:58:04,860 --> 00:58:07,660 No... no. 1292 00:58:08,140 --> 00:58:11,180 I mean, I'm an older man now 1293 00:58:11,180 --> 00:58:12,620 than I used to be, 1294 00:58:12,620 --> 00:58:15,500 and sometimes things don't work 1295 00:58:15,500 --> 00:58:17,420 like they used to. 1296 00:58:17,820 --> 00:58:19,500 Well, Joe, I don't... 1297 00:58:19,500 --> 00:58:21,420 I don't understand what you're trying to say. 1298 00:58:21,900 --> 00:58:25,460 Edna, I have to know something. 1299 00:58:25,500 --> 00:58:28,340 Are you trying to seduce me? 1300 00:58:28,380 --> 00:58:31,700 Why, yes, Joe. 1301 00:58:31,740 --> 00:58:33,140 I am. 1302 00:58:34,620 --> 00:58:36,500 Well, that's just grand. 1303 00:58:36,540 --> 00:58:38,900 But I have to tell you, 1304 00:58:38,940 --> 00:58:41,780 it might be hard for me to satisfy you 1305 00:58:41,820 --> 00:58:45,140 if you've raised your expectations. 1306 00:58:45,180 --> 00:58:47,540 Well, Joe... 1307 00:58:47,580 --> 00:58:49,460 why don't you let me worry about 1308 00:58:49,500 --> 00:58:51,380 what's going to be hard 1309 00:58:51,420 --> 00:58:53,780 and what's going to be raised, hmm? 1310 00:59:03,900 --> 00:59:05,660 I guess if we're gonna get stranded for three hours 1311 00:59:05,660 --> 00:59:07,980 waiting for roadside assistance, 1312 00:59:07,980 --> 00:59:09,580 this is the place to do it. 1313 00:59:18,220 --> 00:59:19,620 Thank you. 1314 00:59:20,140 --> 00:59:22,020 One down, four to go. 1315 00:59:48,380 --> 00:59:49,780 Whoops... ahh! 1316 00:59:49,820 --> 00:59:51,700 I'm sorry. 1317 00:59:51,740 --> 00:59:53,300 Are you okay? 1318 00:59:53,500 --> 00:59:55,460 Are you okay? 1319 00:59:55,500 --> 00:59:57,740 I'll be out in just a moment, Joe. 1320 01:00:00,860 --> 01:00:02,420 Oh, Joe? 1321 01:00:11,940 --> 01:00:13,580 What do you think? 1322 01:00:14,060 --> 01:00:15,340 Wow. 1323 01:00:15,820 --> 01:00:17,140 How do you feel? 1324 01:00:17,700 --> 01:00:19,140 Me? 1325 01:00:19,140 --> 01:00:21,060 Oh, I feel fine. 1326 01:00:21,060 --> 01:00:23,660 I admit, I'm a little nervous, but I... 1327 01:00:23,660 --> 01:00:25,460 Um, Joe? 1328 01:00:25,460 --> 01:00:28,220 Yeah? 1329 01:00:28,220 --> 01:00:29,660 Did I drop something? 1330 01:00:39,220 --> 01:00:40,660 It's alive! 1331 01:00:41,140 --> 01:00:42,980 It's alive! 1332 01:00:42,980 --> 01:00:44,300 Oh, it's a miracle! 1333 01:00:44,300 --> 01:00:45,340 Hallelujah! 1334 01:00:45,340 --> 01:00:47,740 Praise the Lord! 1335 01:00:47,740 --> 01:00:49,660 Quick. 1336 01:00:49,660 --> 01:00:50,620 Quick, before it's gone! 1337 01:00:51,940 --> 01:00:53,380 How's your toe? 1338 01:00:53,380 --> 01:00:55,300 Oh, I think I'll live. 1339 01:00:55,300 --> 01:00:57,700 This frigid temperature is keeping the swelling down. 1340 01:00:57,700 --> 01:00:59,140 Hey, maybe if the dashboard catches on fire, 1341 01:00:59,140 --> 01:01:00,580 it'll heat things up in here. 1342 01:01:01,060 --> 01:01:02,020 Are you cold? 1343 01:01:02,020 --> 01:01:03,460 I can barely feel my fingers. 1344 01:01:03,460 --> 01:01:04,900 Come here. 1345 01:01:06,340 --> 01:01:07,780 Ooh, that feels good. 1346 01:01:29,180 --> 01:01:30,580 You call for a jump? 1347 01:01:31,100 --> 01:01:33,020 Oh, sorry, bro. 1348 01:01:33,020 --> 01:01:35,420 It looks like somebody already got jumped,huh? 1349 01:01:35,420 --> 01:01:38,780 Yeah, uh... no. 1350 01:01:38,780 --> 01:01:41,660 We... we ran out of gas. 1351 01:01:41,660 --> 01:01:42,580 Are you sure? 1352 01:01:43,060 --> 01:01:44,980 It says right here that you need a jump. 1353 01:01:46,900 --> 01:01:48,820 Nope, gas. 1354 01:01:48,820 --> 01:01:51,620 I didn't bring my gas can, so I'll have to tow you. 1355 01:01:51,620 --> 01:01:53,540 Gonna take about a second to hook you up, all right? 1356 01:02:00,260 --> 01:02:01,220 What? 1357 01:02:10,740 --> 01:02:12,180 Oh, my. 1358 01:02:12,660 --> 01:02:14,580 I don't have any protection. 1359 01:02:14,580 --> 01:02:16,020 Protection? 1360 01:02:16,500 --> 01:02:17,940 Protection from what? 1361 01:02:17,940 --> 01:02:19,860 You know, birth control. 1362 01:02:21,780 --> 01:02:23,700 I don't think that'll be an issue. 1363 01:02:24,180 --> 01:02:26,100 Oh, you're on the pill? 1364 01:02:26,100 --> 01:02:27,420 Good thinking. 1365 01:02:47,140 --> 01:02:49,540 It's like that little battery bunny, it's still going. 1366 01:02:53,300 --> 01:02:54,740 Oh, David, stop! 1367 01:02:55,220 --> 01:02:56,900 That tickles. 1368 01:02:58,420 --> 01:02:59,860 Stop, that tickles. 1369 01:03:01,780 --> 01:03:03,220 Oh, oh, oh. 1370 01:03:03,220 --> 01:03:07,060 Ooh, oh, oh, ooh, ooh. 1371 01:03:07,060 --> 01:03:09,460 Edna, Edna, where... 1372 01:03:09,460 --> 01:03:10,900 where... where... 1373 01:03:10,900 --> 01:03:12,820 Edna, where are you... 1374 01:03:13,300 --> 01:03:14,260 Where... 1375 01:03:14,260 --> 01:03:15,700 Edna, look out, look out. 1376 01:03:16,180 --> 01:03:18,540 You're getting close! 1377 01:03:18,540 --> 01:03:20,420 Oh, God. 1378 01:03:22,220 --> 01:03:24,100 Oh, God. 1379 01:03:26,500 --> 01:03:28,900 Oh, God! 1380 01:03:29,060 --> 01:03:30,420 Oh, God! 1381 01:03:30,580 --> 01:03:32,340 - Oh, God! - Oh, God! 1382 01:03:32,500 --> 01:03:34,420 - Oh, God! - Oh, God! 1383 01:03:41,620 --> 01:03:42,580 Wow. 1384 01:03:55,100 --> 01:03:57,580 Bring her right this way, hold the elevator. 1385 01:03:57,580 --> 01:03:59,020 Oh, Edna, I'm sorry. 1386 01:03:59,500 --> 01:04:00,460 So sorry. 1387 01:04:00,460 --> 01:04:01,900 I'm an awful man. 1388 01:04:01,900 --> 01:04:04,300 Oh, no, you're a wonderful man. 1389 01:04:04,300 --> 01:04:07,180 Otherwise, I wouldn't be lying here like this. 1390 01:04:07,180 --> 01:04:09,100 Joe, what happened to Edna? 1391 01:04:10,540 --> 01:04:11,580 Uh... 1392 01:05:10,460 --> 01:05:11,900 Grandpa, I got your message, are you all right? 1393 01:05:11,900 --> 01:05:13,340 What's going on? 1394 01:05:13,340 --> 01:05:15,740 It's not me, it's Edna. 1395 01:05:15,740 --> 01:05:18,460 She's fine, just a little shortness of breath. 1396 01:05:18,460 --> 01:05:20,620 Nothing serious. 1397 01:05:20,620 --> 01:05:22,300 What happened? 1398 01:05:22,780 --> 01:05:24,220 What happened? 1399 01:05:24,220 --> 01:05:26,620 I'll tell you what happened. 1400 01:05:26,620 --> 01:05:29,980 That angel of a woman slipped me a Mickey. 1401 01:05:30,460 --> 01:05:31,900 Have you ever heard 1402 01:05:31,900 --> 01:05:35,020 of a black-market drug called Viagra? 1403 01:05:35,500 --> 01:05:36,460 Oh, please, tell me you... 1404 01:05:36,460 --> 01:05:38,380 - They're these magic pills, see? - No, please, just stop. 1405 01:05:38,380 --> 01:05:40,380 I couldn't have stopped if I tried. 1406 01:05:40,380 --> 01:05:42,300 I kept going and going 1407 01:05:42,300 --> 01:05:44,700 and going and going. 1408 01:05:45,180 --> 01:05:48,220 Actually, I think I might still be going. 1409 01:05:48,220 --> 01:05:51,100 Whoo-ee, those pills are sick! 1410 01:05:51,580 --> 01:05:52,460 They're what? 1411 01:05:52,740 --> 01:05:54,180 David, you may not know it, 1412 01:05:54,180 --> 01:05:57,540 but your grandfather is a sex machine. 1413 01:05:57,540 --> 01:05:59,460 A real "chick maggot". 1414 01:05:59,460 --> 01:06:01,380 Mag... magnet. 1415 01:06:01,380 --> 01:06:03,940 Grandpa, chick magnet. 1416 01:06:04,420 --> 01:06:07,780 Oh, I guess that would make more sense, wouldn't it? 1417 01:06:07,780 --> 01:06:10,660 David, have you ever heard 1418 01:06:10,660 --> 01:06:13,060 of a woman giving a man something called a... 1419 01:06:15,980 --> 01:06:17,900 - She put her mouth on... - Oh, yeah, no, no, I know what it is. 1420 01:06:17,900 --> 01:06:20,820 Your grandmother sure as hell never did that to me. 1421 01:06:20,820 --> 01:06:23,700 My goodness, I felt like a damn Popsicle. 1422 01:06:24,180 --> 01:06:27,060 She even took her dentures out. 1423 01:06:27,060 --> 01:06:29,940 And after that, we did the wild thing. 1424 01:06:29,940 --> 01:06:30,900 The what? 1425 01:06:30,900 --> 01:06:32,820 It was just like riding a bike. 1426 01:06:32,820 --> 01:06:35,700 Well, not just like riding a bike. 1427 01:06:37,140 --> 01:06:41,460 David, I don't know if I ever told you this, 1428 01:06:41,460 --> 01:06:43,860 but your grandmother is the only woman 1429 01:06:43,860 --> 01:06:46,740 I ever had sexual relations with. 1430 01:06:46,740 --> 01:06:49,620 And after last night, I realized, 1431 01:06:50,100 --> 01:06:52,020 bless her soul, 1432 01:06:52,020 --> 01:06:54,900 she didn't have a clue in the bedroom. 1433 01:06:55,380 --> 01:06:57,780 But that Edna, she's a real professional. 1434 01:06:57,780 --> 01:06:59,660 Whoo-ee! 1435 01:06:59,660 --> 01:07:01,180 All right, Grandpa, enough, all right? 1436 01:07:01,180 --> 01:07:03,100 What's with Edna? 1437 01:07:03,100 --> 01:07:04,060 Oh, she's fine. 1438 01:07:04,540 --> 01:07:06,940 Her... her daughter's with her in her room there, 1439 01:07:06,940 --> 01:07:10,340 talking with the retirement-home director. 1440 01:07:14,340 --> 01:07:16,260 That's her daughter? 1441 01:07:16,740 --> 01:07:18,460 Is he gonna explain to her what caused all this? 1442 01:07:19,020 --> 01:07:20,460 Oh, I don't think he'd do that. 1443 01:07:20,460 --> 01:07:22,380 He what?! 1444 01:07:22,380 --> 01:07:25,260 What kind of dirty old men do you let into that place? 1445 01:07:25,740 --> 01:07:27,180 Or maybe he would. 1446 01:07:27,180 --> 01:07:28,580 I assure you that we only have 1447 01:07:28,580 --> 01:07:29,620 the highest of standards... 1448 01:07:29,620 --> 01:07:31,060 As soon as she's ready, 1449 01:07:31,060 --> 01:07:33,940 I want my mother out of that brothel you're running 1450 01:07:34,420 --> 01:07:35,860 and on a plane to my home 1451 01:07:35,860 --> 01:07:37,300 where I can take care of her myself. 1452 01:07:37,300 --> 01:07:38,740 - Sweetie... - Do you understand? 1453 01:07:38,740 --> 01:07:40,180 Let's not overreact here. 1454 01:07:40,180 --> 01:07:42,580 Mother, enough! Discussion over! 1455 01:07:43,060 --> 01:07:45,460 And in the meantime, you make sure 1456 01:07:45,460 --> 01:07:47,660 that lecherous, disgusting old man 1457 01:07:47,660 --> 01:07:49,580 stays the hell away from my mother! 1458 01:07:50,060 --> 01:07:50,940 Just let me explain. 1459 01:07:51,420 --> 01:07:53,500 This kind of thing doesn't happen at our facility. 1460 01:08:06,540 --> 01:08:08,940 Don't go, please. 1461 01:08:08,940 --> 01:08:09,940 I'm sorry, Joe. 1462 01:08:09,940 --> 01:08:10,900 She's my daughter. 1463 01:08:11,380 --> 01:08:13,620 If she wants me to move, I have to go. 1464 01:08:14,100 --> 01:08:15,940 But I love you, Edna. 1465 01:08:15,940 --> 01:08:17,860 Whoa there, Joe. 1466 01:08:17,860 --> 01:08:19,660 Let's not move too quickly here. 1467 01:08:19,660 --> 01:08:22,060 But last night... 1468 01:08:22,540 --> 01:08:24,980 I'll always, always remember last night 1469 01:08:25,460 --> 01:08:27,860 and I will cherish it forever. 1470 01:08:27,860 --> 01:08:29,780 But, y'know, people our age, 1471 01:08:29,780 --> 01:08:34,180 we... we have to live every second to the fullest. 1472 01:08:34,180 --> 01:08:36,940 It doesn't make any sense for either one of us 1473 01:08:36,940 --> 01:08:40,300 to be tied down to just one person. 1474 01:08:40,300 --> 01:08:42,620 Trust me. 1475 01:08:42,620 --> 01:08:44,980 You don't know it yet, 1476 01:08:44,980 --> 01:08:49,300 but you're like a wild stallion 1477 01:08:49,300 --> 01:08:51,700 and you must run free. 1478 01:08:56,460 --> 01:08:59,340 Oh, I'm so sorry, Grandpa. 1479 01:08:59,340 --> 01:09:03,660 I feel like I just met her and it's over already. 1480 01:09:03,660 --> 01:09:05,580 She was such a sweet woman. 1481 01:09:05,580 --> 01:09:08,940 Just being with her, I wasn't so lonely. 1482 01:09:08,940 --> 01:09:10,860 And even when I wasn't with her, 1483 01:09:10,860 --> 01:09:13,260 knowing I was gonna see her again soon, 1484 01:09:13,260 --> 01:09:15,180 knowing somebody was thinking about me, 1485 01:09:15,180 --> 01:09:17,100 somebody cared for me, 1486 01:09:17,580 --> 01:09:19,500 made it easier to get through the day. 1487 01:09:20,900 --> 01:09:23,300 I can't do this again, David. 1488 01:09:23,300 --> 01:09:25,220 I can't take the pain. 1489 01:09:25,220 --> 01:09:27,860 It hurts too much, and it doesn't get any easier. 1490 01:09:27,860 --> 01:09:29,620 I know it's hard right now. 1491 01:09:29,620 --> 01:09:31,900 But don't worry, Grandpa. 1492 01:09:31,900 --> 01:09:33,820 There's another companion out there for you. 1493 01:09:33,820 --> 01:09:35,940 No. 1494 01:09:35,940 --> 01:09:38,420 Your grandmother was my first love, 1495 01:09:38,420 --> 01:09:42,260 Edna was my last. 1496 01:09:42,260 --> 01:09:45,620 Not a bad run for 84 years. 1497 01:09:45,620 --> 01:09:48,500 But now... I'm done with love. 1498 01:09:48,500 --> 01:09:50,900 I'm done, it's over, I'm ending it. 1499 01:09:51,380 --> 01:09:52,820 All right, will you stop talking like that? 1500 01:09:52,820 --> 01:09:54,260 I'm not gonna let you kill yourself. 1501 01:09:54,260 --> 01:09:56,180 Who's killing themselves? 1502 01:09:56,180 --> 01:09:58,100 You think I wanna spend my remaining days 1503 01:09:58,100 --> 01:09:59,540 sitting on some park bench, 1504 01:09:59,540 --> 01:10:01,940 talking about my arthritis with some old biddy? 1505 01:10:02,420 --> 01:10:03,380 What do you mean? 1506 01:10:03,380 --> 01:10:04,820 What about looking for companionship? 1507 01:10:04,820 --> 01:10:06,740 I just got a new start on life 1508 01:10:06,740 --> 01:10:08,660 with those pills. 1509 01:10:08,660 --> 01:10:11,540 They're like bottled erections. 1510 01:10:11,540 --> 01:10:13,460 Once this word gets around the home, 1511 01:10:13,460 --> 01:10:16,340 the babes are gonna be begging for me. 1512 01:10:16,340 --> 01:10:20,180 David... I'm the man now. 1513 01:10:20,180 --> 01:10:22,100 I'm a player. 1514 01:10:22,100 --> 01:10:23,060 I'm dope! 1515 01:10:23,060 --> 01:10:25,940 No, you are a dope. 1516 01:10:25,940 --> 01:10:27,380 You're the one who convinced me 1517 01:10:27,380 --> 01:10:28,820 that I was missing out on something, 1518 01:10:28,820 --> 01:10:30,260 and now that I finally find a girl 1519 01:10:30,260 --> 01:10:32,180 that I kind of really like, 1520 01:10:32,660 --> 01:10:34,580 and you flip over to the other side? 1521 01:10:34,580 --> 01:10:36,500 Circle of life. 1522 01:10:36,500 --> 01:10:39,380 I started out as a baby sucking on a breast, 1523 01:10:39,380 --> 01:10:42,260 and by golly, that's the way I wanna end up. 1524 01:10:42,260 --> 01:10:43,100 I just don't understand. 1525 01:10:43,100 --> 01:10:44,620 David... 1526 01:10:44,620 --> 01:10:46,060 Grandpa's horny, 1527 01:10:46,540 --> 01:10:48,420 and he wants to have some fun. 1528 01:10:48,420 --> 01:10:50,420 That's... that's... 1529 01:10:50,420 --> 01:10:51,460 that's horse feathers! 1530 01:10:51,460 --> 01:10:52,980 No, that's tight. 1531 01:10:52,980 --> 01:10:54,900 That's damn tight. 1532 01:10:56,260 --> 01:10:58,180 So tell me... 1533 01:10:58,180 --> 01:11:00,580 how did things go with your young lady? 1534 01:11:03,460 --> 01:11:04,420 Perfect. 1535 01:11:04,420 --> 01:11:05,380 I hit on all sixes. 1536 01:11:05,380 --> 01:11:06,820 That's my boy. 1537 01:11:06,820 --> 01:11:09,220 Just like your grandfather. 1538 01:11:09,220 --> 01:11:12,180 And I know exactly how we're gonna celebrate. 1539 01:11:13,660 --> 01:11:16,100 Barkeep, a barrel of Viagra for me 1540 01:11:16,100 --> 01:11:18,500 and a case of condoms for my friend here. 1541 01:11:27,420 --> 01:11:28,860 Hi. 1542 01:11:31,980 --> 01:11:33,900 Thanks. 1543 01:11:33,900 --> 01:11:34,860 Um, come on in. 1544 01:11:34,860 --> 01:11:36,660 I'm running late for work. 1545 01:11:38,820 --> 01:11:41,020 So I didn't get a chance 1546 01:11:41,020 --> 01:11:44,220 to say good-bye to you the other night. 1547 01:11:44,220 --> 01:11:47,100 Yeah, I walked home. 1548 01:11:47,100 --> 01:11:48,660 I didn't think you'd be offering me a ride. 1549 01:11:48,660 --> 01:11:50,140 What? 1550 01:11:50,140 --> 01:11:52,700 Of course I would have, why would you say that? 1551 01:11:52,700 --> 01:11:56,100 Because your car ran out of gas. 1552 01:11:56,540 --> 01:11:57,460 Yes, it did. 1553 01:11:57,460 --> 01:11:59,860 Good point. 1554 01:11:59,860 --> 01:12:02,940 I really enjoyed myself the other night. 1555 01:12:05,420 --> 01:12:06,980 Yeah, me too. 1556 01:12:06,980 --> 01:12:09,860 You wanna do it again sometime? 1557 01:12:09,860 --> 01:12:11,300 Sure. 1558 01:12:11,300 --> 01:12:14,340 What are you doing tonight? 1559 01:12:14,340 --> 01:12:15,700 Oh, uh, David, 1560 01:12:16,180 --> 01:12:18,260 I didn't think that you meant right away. 1561 01:12:18,260 --> 01:12:20,900 I just meant, you know, someday. 1562 01:12:20,900 --> 01:12:22,260 I just don't think that 1563 01:12:22,260 --> 01:12:23,220 it would be good for our friendship 1564 01:12:23,220 --> 01:12:25,740 if we made that a regular thing. 1565 01:12:25,740 --> 01:12:27,620 Do you? 1566 01:12:27,620 --> 01:12:29,060 No, no, no, no, of course. 1567 01:12:29,540 --> 01:12:30,980 No, I didn't wanna make it a regular thing. 1568 01:12:30,980 --> 01:12:33,380 I just thought you might wanna 1569 01:12:33,860 --> 01:12:36,220 go out to dinner tonight. 1570 01:12:36,220 --> 01:12:37,140 Really? 1571 01:12:37,140 --> 01:12:38,580 Yeah, no, of course, no. 1572 01:12:38,580 --> 01:12:40,100 The friendship comes first. 1573 01:12:40,100 --> 01:12:43,540 Oh, I'm so glad to hear you say that. 1574 01:12:44,020 --> 01:12:44,980 I would go out tonight, 1575 01:12:45,460 --> 01:12:48,380 but guess who left me a message? 1576 01:12:48,380 --> 01:12:49,740 Who? 1577 01:12:49,740 --> 01:12:51,580 The sexy guy from work. 1578 01:12:51,580 --> 01:12:53,380 Yeah, he wants to go out tonight. 1579 01:12:53,380 --> 01:12:55,380 But I should wait to call him back, right? 1580 01:12:55,860 --> 01:12:57,900 Just play it cool? 1581 01:12:57,900 --> 01:12:59,820 Yeah, oh, totally, yeah. 1582 01:12:59,820 --> 01:13:01,260 Yeah, of course. 1583 01:13:01,260 --> 01:13:04,860 Whoa, look at that, I should go. 1584 01:13:04,860 --> 01:13:08,020 Well, do you wanna have lunch instead? 1585 01:13:08,500 --> 01:13:09,940 Yeah, great. 1586 01:13:10,420 --> 01:13:12,140 I'll see you later. 1587 01:13:12,140 --> 01:13:13,660 So I'll just come by your work? 1588 01:13:13,660 --> 01:13:15,300 Mm-hmm. 1589 01:13:26,620 --> 01:13:28,460 She's the one. 1590 01:13:30,500 --> 01:13:32,020 I'm sorry, David. 1591 01:13:32,020 --> 01:13:33,420 That sucks. 1592 01:13:33,980 --> 01:13:36,820 But like I said, you either know when you meet her 1593 01:13:36,820 --> 01:13:38,740 or you know when you lose her. 1594 01:13:44,020 --> 01:13:46,420 So, obviously word of your prowess 1595 01:13:46,420 --> 01:13:47,860 is out on the street. 1596 01:13:47,860 --> 01:13:50,260 Oh, yeah, my phone won't stop ringing. 1597 01:13:50,260 --> 01:13:52,540 I've met three chicks already. 1598 01:13:52,540 --> 01:13:54,460 Well, Grandpa, that's the bee's knees. 1599 01:13:54,460 --> 01:13:56,940 Yeah, but none of them really lit my fire, you know? 1600 01:14:03,340 --> 01:14:06,300 Grandpa, you're a retirement-home gigolo. 1601 01:14:06,780 --> 01:14:08,700 I'm no longer a one-woman guy. 1602 01:14:09,180 --> 01:14:11,380 I'm a wild stallion, and run free I must. 1603 01:14:11,380 --> 01:14:13,380 You said companionship is the only thing that... 1604 01:14:13,740 --> 01:14:17,060 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1605 01:14:17,060 --> 01:14:19,620 Well, so what are you gonna do about your situation? 1606 01:14:23,420 --> 01:14:25,620 I have no idea. 1607 01:14:25,620 --> 01:14:26,580 No idea. 1608 01:14:26,580 --> 01:14:28,100 I'm lost. 1609 01:14:28,260 --> 01:14:31,700 David, maybe this isn't the right girl for you. 1610 01:14:31,700 --> 01:14:32,660 I mean, maybe... maybe she's not... 1611 01:14:32,660 --> 01:14:34,660 She is, Grandpa. 1612 01:14:34,660 --> 01:14:36,500 She is. 1613 01:14:36,500 --> 01:14:39,300 She's my companion. 1614 01:14:39,300 --> 01:14:41,260 She's special. 1615 01:14:41,260 --> 01:14:43,580 She's different. 1616 01:14:43,580 --> 01:14:45,500 Maybe that's the problem. 1617 01:14:45,500 --> 01:14:47,900 If she's so different, maybe you should use 1618 01:14:47,900 --> 01:14:51,700 a different strategy than you've used before. 1619 01:14:51,700 --> 01:14:55,620 David, if you wanna win the game of love, 1620 01:14:56,100 --> 01:14:59,260 maybe you should stop playing games with women. 1621 01:15:01,460 --> 01:15:02,700 Hmm. 1622 01:15:06,060 --> 01:15:07,100 I have to go to work. 1623 01:15:07,100 --> 01:15:08,620 Do you have to leave already? 1624 01:15:08,620 --> 01:15:11,380 You... you never get to spend time here anymore. 1625 01:15:11,380 --> 01:15:12,780 Stay, please. 1626 01:15:12,780 --> 01:15:15,180 I'm sorry, Grandpa, I really can't. 1627 01:15:15,180 --> 01:15:16,220 Thanks. 1628 01:15:16,780 --> 01:15:18,220 I'll see you soon. 1629 01:15:25,660 --> 01:15:28,380 Is that a smoking jacket you're wearing? 1630 01:15:28,940 --> 01:15:30,380 Oh, yes, indeedy. 1631 01:15:30,860 --> 01:15:32,780 A few of the girls pitched in and bought it for me. 1632 01:15:33,260 --> 01:15:34,300 You like? 1633 01:15:54,660 --> 01:15:55,780 I don't know. 1634 01:15:56,260 --> 01:15:58,380 You know, as much as I hate to admit it, 1635 01:15:58,380 --> 01:16:00,300 ever since Carrie... 1636 01:16:00,300 --> 01:16:02,580 how should I put it?... 1637 01:16:02,580 --> 01:16:05,460 put my balls in a sling, 1638 01:16:05,460 --> 01:16:09,220 life has been nice, you know? 1639 01:16:09,220 --> 01:16:10,180 I mean, don't get me wrong. 1640 01:16:10,180 --> 01:16:11,620 I... I... of course, I miss living 1641 01:16:11,620 --> 01:16:14,500 the wild bachelor life vicariously through you, 1642 01:16:14,980 --> 01:16:17,380 but, uh... and of course, you know, I miss... 1643 01:16:17,380 --> 01:16:19,700 I miss my balls, you know? 1644 01:16:19,700 --> 01:16:22,700 But it's been, you know, it's been kind of fun. 1645 01:16:22,700 --> 01:16:24,140 In fact, you'll like this. 1646 01:16:24,140 --> 01:16:27,980 The other night, Carrie took me out to the club dancing. 1647 01:16:27,980 --> 01:16:31,300 Um, after we played... after we played Scrabble. 1648 01:16:31,300 --> 01:16:34,660 I'll take it, but without the navigation system. 1649 01:16:38,660 --> 01:16:40,780 I said, I'll buy the car. 1650 01:16:41,740 --> 01:16:43,180 Okay. 1651 01:16:43,180 --> 01:16:45,580 Just step into my office. 1652 01:16:45,580 --> 01:16:46,860 I'll be one... 1653 01:16:49,340 --> 01:16:50,300 Hey. 1654 01:16:50,300 --> 01:16:52,180 Hey, you ready for lunch? 1655 01:16:52,180 --> 01:16:54,660 Yeah, um, I just have a customer in the office, 1656 01:16:54,660 --> 01:16:55,740 and then I'm all set. 1657 01:16:55,740 --> 01:16:56,780 All right, cool. 1658 01:16:57,260 --> 01:16:58,700 Well, I will just browse around 1659 01:16:59,180 --> 01:17:00,620 and pretend like I can actually afford 1660 01:17:00,620 --> 01:17:02,020 some of these cars. 1661 01:17:02,500 --> 01:17:03,740 All right, uh... 1662 01:17:03,740 --> 01:17:06,140 Um, you know what? 1663 01:17:06,140 --> 01:17:07,580 Before we go, I... I need to... 1664 01:17:07,580 --> 01:17:09,500 I gotta talk to you. 1665 01:17:09,500 --> 01:17:11,020 If it's about the other night... 1666 01:17:11,020 --> 01:17:13,500 No, no, no, no, no, it's, um... 1667 01:17:13,500 --> 01:17:17,340 it's... it's more than that. 1668 01:17:17,340 --> 01:17:20,100 I haven't been completely 1669 01:17:20,100 --> 01:17:24,140 honest with you about my feelings. 1670 01:17:24,140 --> 01:17:26,260 David, excuse me. Yeah. 1671 01:17:26,740 --> 01:17:29,620 There is a customer waiting for you in your office. 1672 01:17:29,620 --> 01:17:31,060 I'll be there in a moment. 1673 01:17:31,060 --> 01:17:32,980 They are ready to sign contracts. 1674 01:17:33,460 --> 01:17:35,860 I said, in a moment! 1675 01:17:35,860 --> 01:17:37,780 Just... 1676 01:17:41,620 --> 01:17:42,580 Sorry. 1677 01:17:42,580 --> 01:17:44,020 Um... 1678 01:17:47,860 --> 01:17:51,220 I'm interested in you... 1679 01:17:51,220 --> 01:17:53,140 more than a friend. 1680 01:17:53,140 --> 01:17:55,340 Romantically. 1681 01:17:55,340 --> 01:17:57,020 I've been interested in you since I met you 1682 01:17:57,020 --> 01:17:59,020 at the football game, 1683 01:17:59,020 --> 01:18:00,940 and since we've become friends, 1684 01:18:00,940 --> 01:18:02,380 what I initially thought was gonna be 1685 01:18:02,380 --> 01:18:05,180 a passing thing has turned into much more, 1686 01:18:05,180 --> 01:18:08,860 and I wanna be with you. 1687 01:18:09,340 --> 01:18:12,220 Because... 1688 01:18:12,220 --> 01:18:14,500 I think I love you. 1689 01:18:17,660 --> 01:18:19,140 I love you, too. 1690 01:18:21,060 --> 01:18:22,860 But... 1691 01:18:25,780 --> 01:18:27,620 ...not in the same way. 1692 01:18:31,980 --> 01:18:32,940 Why? 1693 01:18:32,940 --> 01:18:34,500 We're good together. 1694 01:18:35,060 --> 01:18:37,940 Look, I... 1695 01:18:37,940 --> 01:18:40,140 wouldn't be honest if I said that I haven't 1696 01:18:40,140 --> 01:18:44,460 thought about you romantically, because I have. 1697 01:18:44,940 --> 01:18:47,580 But I just don't think it would work. 1698 01:18:47,580 --> 01:18:49,420 Why not? 1699 01:18:49,420 --> 01:18:50,860 David, I insist that you... 1700 01:18:50,860 --> 01:18:52,220 Let's talk outside. 1701 01:18:52,220 --> 01:18:53,500 Hey! 1702 01:18:53,500 --> 01:18:56,220 You leave that customer waiting one more second, 1703 01:18:56,220 --> 01:18:58,140 you're through. 1704 01:18:58,140 --> 01:18:59,580 Get your hand off me! 1705 01:19:06,300 --> 01:19:08,620 Why won't it work out? 1706 01:19:08,620 --> 01:19:10,380 I just don't think you're my type, David. 1707 01:19:10,380 --> 01:19:11,420 What? 1708 01:19:11,420 --> 01:19:12,380 Why not? 1709 01:19:12,860 --> 01:19:15,060 I'm looking for someone who's sincere 1710 01:19:15,060 --> 01:19:16,500 and up-front 1711 01:19:16,500 --> 01:19:18,620 and open with their feelings, and that's not you. 1712 01:19:18,620 --> 01:19:19,660 I'm being pretty damn open with my feelings 1713 01:19:20,140 --> 01:19:21,660 right now, aren't I? 1714 01:19:22,140 --> 01:19:23,580 It's bigger than that. 1715 01:19:23,580 --> 01:19:25,500 I mean, how long have you felt this way? 1716 01:19:25,500 --> 01:19:26,940 You've never even said a word, 1717 01:19:26,940 --> 01:19:27,780 never even hinted at it. 1718 01:19:27,780 --> 01:19:29,700 For the first time in my life, 1719 01:19:29,700 --> 01:19:32,100 I have spilled my guts out. 1720 01:19:32,100 --> 01:19:35,460 I have never done that for anyone. 1721 01:19:35,460 --> 01:19:37,420 Doesn't that mean anything to you? 1722 01:19:37,900 --> 01:19:41,260 Frankly, David, what I think it means 1723 01:19:41,260 --> 01:19:44,140 is you've tried everything. 1724 01:19:44,140 --> 01:19:45,580 Now you're desperate. 1725 01:19:48,420 --> 01:19:50,900 Look, can't we just get past this? 1726 01:19:50,900 --> 01:19:51,940 Our friendship is... 1727 01:19:51,940 --> 01:19:54,940 I'm not interested in a friendship! 1728 01:19:54,940 --> 01:19:56,500 Okay? 1729 01:19:56,500 --> 01:19:57,940 I never was! 1730 01:20:01,460 --> 01:20:04,340 That's good to know. 1731 01:20:04,820 --> 01:20:06,260 Nice. 1732 01:20:07,660 --> 01:20:08,820 So that's it, then? 1733 01:20:11,620 --> 01:20:13,620 Great. 1734 01:20:13,620 --> 01:20:15,540 That's just great. 1735 01:20:15,540 --> 01:20:17,460 It was nice knowing you, David. 1736 01:20:23,540 --> 01:20:24,980 Ugh! 1737 01:20:29,540 --> 01:20:31,940 I want you to gather your stuff 1738 01:20:31,940 --> 01:20:33,300 and get out 1739 01:20:33,300 --> 01:20:35,220 and not come back. 1740 01:20:38,580 --> 01:20:40,500 Keep it... Dad. 1741 01:20:43,020 --> 01:20:44,940 Checkmate. 1742 01:20:44,940 --> 01:20:46,420 Game over. 1743 01:20:48,220 --> 01:20:49,460 Can you stay for dinner tonight? 1744 01:20:49,460 --> 01:20:52,260 They're serving Chicken Kiev. 1745 01:20:52,260 --> 01:20:54,940 I don't know. 1746 01:20:54,940 --> 01:20:57,340 I got an erection the other night. 1747 01:20:57,340 --> 01:21:01,020 All natural, no Viagra. 1748 01:21:01,020 --> 01:21:04,460 I keep seeing your friend's grandmother everywhere. 1749 01:21:04,460 --> 01:21:06,860 That Rose is tight. 1750 01:21:07,340 --> 01:21:09,740 But she won't pay any attention to me. 1751 01:21:09,740 --> 01:21:11,180 I'm seeing two other ladies, 1752 01:21:11,660 --> 01:21:15,500 but I can't seem to get Rose out of my mind. 1753 01:21:15,500 --> 01:21:18,140 Any ideas, Casanova? 1754 01:21:18,140 --> 01:21:20,780 Did you try that buddy-buddy thing I told you about? 1755 01:21:20,780 --> 01:21:23,180 Eh, like most of your plans, 1756 01:21:23,180 --> 01:21:26,020 I figure it's a piece of crap. 1757 01:21:26,020 --> 01:21:27,940 Well, try it. 1758 01:21:29,780 --> 01:21:32,180 Well, what's eating you, David? 1759 01:21:32,180 --> 01:21:35,540 Is it your lady friend? 1760 01:21:35,540 --> 01:21:38,660 Are you doing as well as I am? 1761 01:21:38,660 --> 01:21:40,940 No. 1762 01:21:40,940 --> 01:21:42,380 I'm doing worse. 1763 01:22:08,660 --> 01:22:09,620 Hello? 1764 01:22:09,620 --> 01:22:10,580 It's your dad. 1765 01:22:11,060 --> 01:22:12,020 You've missed three damn weeks already, 1766 01:22:12,020 --> 01:22:13,460 and now you're late again. 1767 01:22:13,460 --> 01:22:14,900 What are you talking about? 1768 01:22:15,380 --> 01:22:17,140 You're late for your job. 1769 01:22:17,140 --> 01:22:18,940 Are you coming in today or not? 1770 01:22:18,940 --> 01:22:21,700 Because if you're not, I'll fire you again. 1771 01:22:24,420 --> 01:22:26,340 Yeah, I'll be there in an hour. 1772 01:22:26,340 --> 01:22:27,780 Make it 45 minutes! 1773 01:22:30,260 --> 01:22:34,580 I told you, as much as I'd love to, I... I can't. 1774 01:22:34,580 --> 01:22:36,500 I'm already dating a man. 1775 01:22:36,500 --> 01:22:38,900 I'm dating around, too. 1776 01:22:38,900 --> 01:22:41,300 I just wanna be friends. 1777 01:22:41,300 --> 01:22:44,540 Friends have dinner together, too, don't they? 1778 01:22:44,540 --> 01:22:45,980 I suppose they do. 1779 01:22:45,980 --> 01:22:48,180 Maybe you already have too many friends, 1780 01:22:48,180 --> 01:22:50,580 but even so, in a place like this, 1781 01:22:50,580 --> 01:22:52,300 who knows who's gonna croak next? 1782 01:22:54,140 --> 01:22:55,100 Bad run of luck, 1783 01:22:55,100 --> 01:22:56,500 and you could be friendless is a week. 1784 01:22:59,100 --> 01:23:00,540 Joe. 1785 01:23:02,100 --> 01:23:04,980 Roadside assistance is kind of expensive. 1786 01:23:04,980 --> 01:23:07,060 You... you think we really need it? 1787 01:23:07,060 --> 01:23:08,500 Not at all. 1788 01:23:08,500 --> 01:23:10,140 I'll take it off. 1789 01:23:11,660 --> 01:23:14,060 Of course, that's always when something happens, isn't it? 1790 01:23:14,540 --> 01:23:16,020 And probably when your wife is driving. 1791 01:23:18,500 --> 01:23:19,940 Uh, keep it. 1792 01:23:19,940 --> 01:23:22,860 I guess it's worth it. 1793 01:23:22,860 --> 01:23:24,300 Okay. 1794 01:23:24,300 --> 01:23:26,580 I'll just go get this approved. 1795 01:23:33,460 --> 01:23:34,900 Still got it. 1796 01:24:02,260 --> 01:24:04,380 A good profit margin on this one? 1797 01:24:04,380 --> 01:24:05,740 I'd say so. 1798 01:24:05,740 --> 01:24:07,500 Take note, Rob. 1799 01:24:07,500 --> 01:24:09,260 Two hours back on the lot, 1800 01:24:09,740 --> 01:24:11,660 the man's already sold a car. 1801 01:24:11,660 --> 01:24:12,620 I told you, David. 1802 01:24:12,620 --> 01:24:14,460 You were born for this. 1803 01:24:14,460 --> 01:24:16,260 Couldn't agree with you more, Dick. 1804 01:24:20,340 --> 01:24:21,780 Unfortunately, we had to make a few changes 1805 01:24:21,780 --> 01:24:23,220 to get the contract approved, 1806 01:24:23,220 --> 01:24:25,140 but I got you a new one with what I think you'll find 1807 01:24:25,140 --> 01:24:27,220 are much more favorable terms. 1808 01:24:28,740 --> 01:24:29,860 But you can't do this. 1809 01:24:29,860 --> 01:24:30,900 It's already done. 1810 01:24:30,900 --> 01:24:31,860 Signed by the manager right there. 1811 01:24:32,340 --> 01:24:34,260 Now when you sign it, it becomes legally binding. 1812 01:24:34,740 --> 01:24:37,180 You can't back out and, of course, neither can we. 1813 01:24:37,180 --> 01:24:39,060 But you're selling us a car for a dollar? 1814 01:24:39,060 --> 01:24:40,100 Uh, that's true, 1815 01:24:40,580 --> 01:24:42,020 but I'm also throwing in the roadside assistance 1816 01:24:42,020 --> 01:24:44,900 and the warranty and the CD player. 1817 01:24:44,900 --> 01:24:47,300 And our crappy navigation system. 1818 01:24:47,300 --> 01:24:49,420 Now, I couldn't get you financing, 1819 01:24:49,420 --> 01:24:50,860 so you'll have to pay cash up-front. 1820 01:24:50,860 --> 01:24:52,620 Is that acceptable? 1821 01:24:52,620 --> 01:24:54,620 - Yeah... - Great. 1822 01:24:54,620 --> 01:24:55,700 Sign right there. 1823 01:25:00,140 --> 01:25:01,100 Wonderful. 1824 01:25:01,580 --> 01:25:02,540 Congratulations on the new car. 1825 01:25:02,540 --> 01:25:03,500 Congratulations. 1826 01:25:03,980 --> 01:25:05,860 Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to run. 1827 01:25:05,860 --> 01:25:06,900 Wait, I don't understand. 1828 01:25:07,380 --> 01:25:09,780 How can you sell me a car for a dollar? 1829 01:25:09,860 --> 01:25:11,900 Volume. 1830 01:25:12,180 --> 01:25:14,100 Volume. 1831 01:25:14,580 --> 01:25:15,980 Makes sense. 1832 01:25:16,460 --> 01:25:17,900 Bring this back when it's right. 1833 01:25:17,900 --> 01:25:19,340 Sure. 1834 01:25:26,060 --> 01:25:27,500 What? 1835 01:25:29,380 --> 01:25:30,820 David! 1836 01:25:32,020 --> 01:25:33,780 David! 1837 01:26:28,820 --> 01:26:31,220 David, uh... 1838 01:26:31,220 --> 01:26:35,060 would you mind if I skipped our dinner tomorrow night? 1839 01:26:35,060 --> 01:26:36,500 We've had dinner together every night 1840 01:26:36,500 --> 01:26:37,460 for the past two weeks. 1841 01:26:37,460 --> 01:26:39,860 I think I can fend for myself one night. 1842 01:26:40,340 --> 01:26:41,580 Got big plans? 1843 01:26:41,580 --> 01:26:44,060 That buddy-buddy thing worked. 1844 01:26:44,060 --> 01:26:46,940 Rose agreed to have dinner with me. 1845 01:26:46,940 --> 01:26:50,340 I can't believe how lucky I am. 1846 01:26:50,340 --> 01:26:52,260 I'm happy for you. 1847 01:26:54,620 --> 01:26:57,220 Still thinking about Julie? 1848 01:26:57,220 --> 01:27:00,100 She thought I was a player. 1849 01:27:00,100 --> 01:27:02,980 You were. 1850 01:27:02,980 --> 01:27:03,940 Great. 1851 01:27:04,020 --> 01:27:04,980 Well, thanks for the help. 1852 01:27:05,100 --> 01:27:08,300 That's very helpful... help. 1853 01:27:08,780 --> 01:27:10,220 David... 1854 01:27:10,700 --> 01:27:12,620 you gotta ask yourself, 1855 01:27:12,620 --> 01:27:14,540 are you a player 1856 01:27:15,020 --> 01:27:18,420 or were you just playing? 1857 01:27:18,900 --> 01:27:20,340 'Cause if she wasn't interested 1858 01:27:20,820 --> 01:27:23,700 in the man you were, 1859 01:27:24,180 --> 01:27:27,060 she might be interested in the man you are. 1860 01:28:04,740 --> 01:28:06,660 Excuse me. 1861 01:28:10,020 --> 01:28:11,460 Excuse me. 1862 01:28:14,500 --> 01:28:17,420 I think your wash is done. 1863 01:28:17,420 --> 01:28:18,860 Thanks, David. 1864 01:28:22,020 --> 01:28:23,380 David. 1865 01:28:25,580 --> 01:28:27,460 How are you? 1866 01:28:27,500 --> 01:28:29,900 I'm good. 1867 01:28:29,900 --> 01:28:33,700 Uh, I'm... I'm... I'm not good. 1868 01:28:33,700 --> 01:28:37,220 I miss you... a lot. 1869 01:28:37,260 --> 01:28:39,380 I miss you, too. 1870 01:28:45,300 --> 01:28:47,140 Listen... 1871 01:28:47,140 --> 01:28:49,060 I've been doing a lot of thinking, 1872 01:28:49,060 --> 01:28:51,940 and I've made a lot of changes. 1873 01:28:51,940 --> 01:28:52,980 I know. 1874 01:28:52,980 --> 01:28:55,460 I've seen you at the home. 1875 01:28:55,460 --> 01:28:59,780 And I think what you're doing is wonderful and sincere, 1876 01:28:59,780 --> 01:29:02,180 and I really admire you. 1877 01:29:02,180 --> 01:29:04,020 You do? 1878 01:29:06,060 --> 01:29:07,460 Yeah. 1879 01:29:07,500 --> 01:29:11,300 Well, all that stuff that you said about me before... 1880 01:29:11,340 --> 01:29:12,740 you were right. 1881 01:29:12,780 --> 01:29:15,180 But that was when I was looking for something else. 1882 01:29:15,180 --> 01:29:17,100 I was... I was looking for something 1883 01:29:17,100 --> 01:29:19,460 that wasn't important. 1884 01:29:19,500 --> 01:29:22,860 And now I'm looking for... 1885 01:29:23,340 --> 01:29:24,900 a companion, 1886 01:29:25,420 --> 01:29:27,700 and I know that the way to go about that 1887 01:29:27,700 --> 01:29:29,700 is to stop playing games 1888 01:29:29,700 --> 01:29:34,500 and to stop being scared of... 1889 01:29:34,980 --> 01:29:38,740 whatever and to be up-front with my feelings. 1890 01:29:41,740 --> 01:29:45,540 And my feelings are 1891 01:29:45,580 --> 01:29:48,900 that I care about you... 1892 01:29:48,940 --> 01:29:50,820 deeply. 1893 01:29:50,860 --> 01:29:54,180 And I need you in my life. 1894 01:29:56,780 --> 01:29:57,860 And I wanna be the type of person 1895 01:29:57,900 --> 01:29:59,780 that you would be proud to be with, 1896 01:29:59,820 --> 01:30:02,180 not the type of person that I was, 1897 01:30:02,220 --> 01:30:04,500 but the type of person that I truly know I am. 1898 01:30:08,220 --> 01:30:12,020 When I met you, I was lost 1899 01:30:12,060 --> 01:30:15,860 and when I found you... 1900 01:30:15,900 --> 01:30:17,780 I found me, 1901 01:30:18,300 --> 01:30:21,220 and I want you to get to know that person. 1902 01:30:25,020 --> 01:30:27,380 I would really like to get to know that person, too. 1903 01:30:34,260 --> 01:30:36,180 How about we start with 1904 01:30:36,180 --> 01:30:38,580 a get-to-know-you dinner? 1905 01:30:40,980 --> 01:30:42,420 Okay. 1906 01:30:44,340 --> 01:30:46,740 Oh, you know, I have these gift certificates 1907 01:30:46,740 --> 01:30:48,180 for this restaurant, 1908 01:30:48,180 --> 01:30:51,060 but they expire on Sunday. 1909 01:30:51,060 --> 01:30:52,980 Oh. 1910 01:31:57,700 --> 01:32:00,420 We leave you two alone for one minute. 1911 01:32:00,420 --> 01:32:02,340 All right, come on, Grandpa, let's go fishing. 1912 01:32:02,340 --> 01:32:04,740 I think you need to cool down a little bit. 1913 01:32:12,900 --> 01:32:16,260 It lessens the "G" forces on your derriere. 1914 01:32:16,740 --> 01:32:18,180 So I've heard. 1915 01:32:22,020 --> 01:32:25,380 David's a very nice young man. 1916 01:32:25,380 --> 01:32:27,300 Yeah. 1917 01:32:27,300 --> 01:32:29,220 His grandpa's pretty cute, too, huh, Grandma? 1918 01:32:29,700 --> 01:32:32,100 Oh, yeah. 1919 01:32:32,100 --> 01:32:34,020 He's good in the old sack, too. 1920 01:32:34,020 --> 01:32:35,460 Grandma! 1921 01:32:38,020 --> 01:32:39,940 Life is good, David. 1922 01:32:40,420 --> 01:32:44,260 We've caught ourselves two beautiful babes 1923 01:32:44,260 --> 01:32:47,620 and have them eating out of the palms of our hands. 1924 01:32:48,100 --> 01:32:51,460 And not only do I have Rose, 1925 01:32:51,460 --> 01:32:54,420 but she wants to keep dating other people. 1926 01:32:54,420 --> 01:32:55,940 Are you sure that's what you want? 1927 01:32:55,940 --> 01:32:58,820 Yep, it's the perfect arrangement. 1928 01:32:58,820 --> 01:33:00,740 Are you sure that's what she wants? 1929 01:33:00,740 --> 01:33:02,420 Oh, yeah. 1930 01:33:02,420 --> 01:33:05,140 Well, I guess that does sound like the perfect arrangement. 1931 01:33:05,140 --> 01:33:07,060 Yeah. 1932 01:33:07,060 --> 01:33:09,940 You know, Grandpa, you're quite the bee's knees. 1933 01:33:11,380 --> 01:33:12,820 I prefer "chick magnet". 1934 01:33:37,300 --> 01:33:41,140 You know, the only problem is he's still dating other women. 1935 01:33:41,140 --> 01:33:44,020 He doesn't seem to want a real relationship. 1936 01:33:44,020 --> 01:33:45,940 And you do? 1937 01:33:45,940 --> 01:33:47,780 Oh, yes. 1938 01:33:47,780 --> 01:33:49,780 Listen, Grandma, 1939 01:33:49,780 --> 01:33:51,700 if you wanna win the game of love, 1940 01:33:51,700 --> 01:33:54,100 you have to play the game. 1941 01:33:54,580 --> 01:33:56,500 Take David and me, for example. 1942 01:33:56,500 --> 01:33:57,940 Remember the first time I spotted him? 1943 01:33:58,420 --> 01:34:00,420 Oh, I remember. 1944 01:34:00,420 --> 01:34:03,220 Step one: reconnaissance. 1945 01:34:03,220 --> 01:34:04,180 When a guy visits his grandfather 1946 01:34:04,660 --> 01:34:05,620 at a retirement home, 1947 01:34:05,620 --> 01:34:09,780 it's a pretty good sign he's a nice guy. 1948 01:34:09,780 --> 01:34:12,260 Step two: the approach. 1949 01:34:12,260 --> 01:34:14,180 He's a bit of a player, 1950 01:34:14,180 --> 01:34:16,100 but deep down, he's a good guy. 1951 01:34:16,100 --> 01:34:18,500 If you could just get him to grow up. 1952 01:34:18,500 --> 01:34:20,580 You have to meet him or, more accurately, 1953 01:34:20,580 --> 01:34:22,100 have him meet you. 1954 01:34:22,100 --> 01:34:24,500 You know, I can get him to play football this weekend 1955 01:34:24,500 --> 01:34:26,900 if you want to run into him. 1956 01:34:27,380 --> 01:34:28,180 Really? 1957 01:34:28,260 --> 01:34:29,380 Planned spontaneity... 1958 01:34:29,380 --> 01:34:31,780 That's the name of the game. 1959 01:34:33,540 --> 01:34:35,940 Step three: the buildup. 1960 01:34:35,940 --> 01:34:37,380 Get him interested by showing him 1961 01:34:37,380 --> 01:34:39,300 you're smarter than he is. 1962 01:34:39,300 --> 01:34:42,660 James II was king in 1630. 1963 01:34:42,660 --> 01:34:45,780 I have no idea who the king of England was in 1630, 1964 01:34:45,780 --> 01:34:49,060 but I didn't think he was about to look it up. 1965 01:34:49,060 --> 01:34:51,620 Step four: the follow-through. 1966 01:34:51,620 --> 01:34:53,140 He'll be chasing you, 1967 01:34:53,140 --> 01:34:55,460 but you don't have to make it easy on him. 1968 01:34:55,460 --> 01:34:57,380 There was some sort of poetic justice 1969 01:34:57,380 --> 01:34:59,060 in him doing his girlfriend's laundry 1970 01:34:59,060 --> 01:35:01,380 months before I was actually his girlfriend. 1971 01:35:01,380 --> 01:35:03,300 It's my girlfriend's. 1972 01:35:03,300 --> 01:35:05,220 Sure it is. 1973 01:35:05,220 --> 01:35:06,740 And because information is everything... 1974 01:35:07,220 --> 01:35:08,180 Can we pay with these? 1975 01:35:08,180 --> 01:35:10,980 ...it's always nice to have someone on the inside. 1976 01:35:11,940 --> 01:35:13,380 And the most important step, 1977 01:35:13,380 --> 01:35:15,220 step five: the Groucho effect. 1978 01:35:15,220 --> 01:35:16,660 Your package is here. 1979 01:35:16,660 --> 01:35:18,180 Thank you. 1980 01:35:18,180 --> 01:35:19,700 It says that men won't join any club 1981 01:35:19,700 --> 01:35:21,220 that would have them as a member. 1982 01:35:21,220 --> 01:35:22,180 Whoa, wait, he's here! 1983 01:35:22,180 --> 01:35:24,100 I need you. 1984 01:35:24,100 --> 01:35:25,060 Oh, I'm so sorry, sweetie. 1985 01:35:25,060 --> 01:35:26,980 I'm running late, I can't do it. 1986 01:35:26,980 --> 01:35:28,740 But my Uncle Paul's here. 1987 01:35:28,740 --> 01:35:30,180 He used to be an actor. 1988 01:35:30,180 --> 01:35:31,060 Uncle Paul! 1989 01:35:31,060 --> 01:35:32,180 Unlike women, men just don't know 1990 01:35:32,660 --> 01:35:34,580 when they've got something good. 1991 01:35:34,580 --> 01:35:35,940 Hello. 1992 01:35:35,940 --> 01:35:38,340 But when you make him work to get in the club, 1993 01:35:38,340 --> 01:35:40,180 he thinks he's lucky to get you. 1994 01:35:40,660 --> 01:35:41,860 Okay, come with me. 1995 01:35:41,860 --> 01:35:45,300 And because men sometimes fear commitment, 1996 01:35:45,300 --> 01:35:47,700 there's a step six: 1997 01:35:47,700 --> 01:35:49,620 the pull-back. 1998 01:35:49,620 --> 01:35:52,740 Give him a view of what life would be like without you, 1999 01:35:52,740 --> 01:35:56,100 and that's when he'll realize what he really wants. 2000 01:35:56,420 --> 01:35:57,780 In David's case, 2001 01:35:57,780 --> 01:35:59,220 there was nothing like a one-night stand 2002 01:35:59,220 --> 01:36:02,900 to make him realize I wasn't just another one-night stand. 2003 01:36:02,900 --> 01:36:05,140 She's the one. 2004 01:36:05,140 --> 01:36:06,540 It's a bit of a gamble, 2005 01:36:07,060 --> 01:36:09,420 but if you have patience and you play the game right, 2006 01:36:09,460 --> 01:36:11,340 it pays off. 2007 01:36:13,380 --> 01:36:15,620 And with David... 2008 01:36:15,620 --> 01:36:17,140 it paid off. 2009 01:36:21,140 --> 01:36:22,580 Well, it sure paid off for you, 2010 01:36:22,580 --> 01:36:24,980 but... I don't know. 2011 01:36:27,380 --> 01:36:28,900 Hey, Rose! 2012 01:36:28,900 --> 01:36:30,820 How about we eat dinner early tonight? 2013 01:36:30,820 --> 01:36:32,340 I'm hungry. 2014 01:36:35,300 --> 01:36:37,660 Oh, sorry, sweetie, 2015 01:36:37,700 --> 01:36:41,220 but I told Mervin I would eat dinner with him tonight. 2016 01:36:55,660 --> 01:36:58,420 PLAY THE GAME - There's more... - 2017 01:41:54,380 --> 01:41:56,140 THE END