1
00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000
 


2
00:00:30,679 --> 00:00:32,271
Hey.

3
00:00:38,454 --> 00:00:40,046
Bye!

4
00:00:42,725 --> 00:00:45,057
Bouquet? Bouquet.

5
00:00:45,227 --> 00:00:46,216
Beautiful, isn't it?

6
00:00:47,629 --> 00:00:49,290
But let me tell you the truth.

7
00:00:49,798 --> 00:00:54,167
For a lot of people, marriage is like
sticking your tongue on a frozen flagpole.

8
00:00:54,336 --> 00:00:57,100
It looks like fun when you see
friends doing it, so you say:

9
00:00:57,272 --> 00:01:00,139
"Hey, I'll give it a try.
Just once."

10
00:01:00,309 --> 00:01:03,540
Next thing you know, you're stuck.

11
00:01:03,712 --> 00:01:05,179
Full of regret.

12
00:01:05,347 --> 00:01:07,838
Praying, "Please get me
out of this with my dignity...

13
00:01:08,016 --> 00:01:10,985
...if least not my extremities, intact."

14
00:01:11,153 --> 00:01:13,348
But it doesn't have to be
like that, my friends.

15
00:01:13,522 --> 00:01:16,650
It does not have to be like that.

16
00:01:16,825 --> 00:01:18,383
That's where I come in.

17
00:01:18,560 --> 00:01:21,028
Good marriages are my business.

18
00:01:21,396 --> 00:01:23,387
<i>Meeting the right person
in the first place?</i>

19
00:01:23,564 --> 00:01:26,329
<i>Well, my friends,
that is up to you.</i>

20
00:01:26,502 --> 00:01:27,969
Oh, I'm sorry.

21
00:01:28,137 --> 00:01:31,265
- I'll go.
- Yeah, you go. Okay.

22
00:01:47,689 --> 00:01:50,214
- Hi. I'm Sadie.
- Hi. Ben.

23
00:01:50,392 --> 00:01:52,622
<i>From that first, destined meeting...</i>

24
00:01:53,162 --> 00:01:56,188
<i>... to the sweet innocence
of the first date.</i>

25
00:02:01,136 --> 00:02:03,468
- Are you skipping to second base?
- What's that? No.

26
00:02:03,639 --> 00:02:05,368
You know why? I'm not a skipper.

27
00:02:05,541 --> 00:02:10,478
Maybe we should take care of first base,
just to make things right.

28
00:02:13,148 --> 00:02:15,241
<i>The first kiss.</i>

29
00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:18,386
<i>The first time you say "I love you."</i>

30
00:02:18,554 --> 00:02:20,283
- I love you.
- What?

31
00:02:20,455 --> 00:02:23,083
What? A view.
What a view.

32
00:02:23,258 --> 00:02:26,819
<i>First time you say "I love you,"
and she actually hears you.</i>

33
00:02:26,995 --> 00:02:28,485
I love you.

34
00:02:30,098 --> 00:02:33,226
- I'm afraid you're not my type.
- I love you too.

35
00:02:40,008 --> 00:02:42,568
You seriously didn't think I was
gonna let you see that?

36
00:02:43,445 --> 00:02:46,107
<i>Let's skip to the next thing:
moving in together.</i>

37
00:02:46,281 --> 00:02:50,240
<i>The first time she finds something
you don't want her to see.</i>

38
00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:54,551
- Don't worry, I got the heavy ones.
- "Dear Mr. Brian Boitano."

39
00:02:54,723 --> 00:02:57,453
- Oh, God!
- "Congratulations on your triple Axel.

40
00:02:57,993 --> 00:02:59,984
I wonder how much
you practice every week...

41
00:03:00,162 --> 00:03:03,996
...and also how you make your hair
stay like that."

42
00:03:04,166 --> 00:03:06,600
Hey, he was a legend. Okay?

43
00:03:06,768 --> 00:03:09,601
I mean, even at age 9 I knew that.

44
00:03:10,005 --> 00:03:12,838
I'm gonna get a less embarrassing box.
Okay.

45
00:03:13,008 --> 00:03:15,442
<i>If she doesn't dump your
wussy ass after that...</i>

46
00:03:16,645 --> 00:03:19,205
...then comes the big one: the proposal.

47
00:03:30,058 --> 00:03:31,218
Sadie...

48
00:03:31,393 --> 00:03:32,985
...you're a great girl. You are.

49
00:03:33,161 --> 00:03:35,527
And I think it's time that
you and I were man and...

50
00:03:35,697 --> 00:03:37,688
Lame. That is so lame.

51
00:03:41,837 --> 00:03:45,204
We are so pleased all of you
could be here with us today...

52
00:03:45,374 --> 00:03:49,606
...to celebrate our 30 years of marriage.

53
00:03:49,778 --> 00:03:51,040
Cheers.

54
00:03:53,548 --> 00:03:54,537
Cheers.

55
00:03:55,150 --> 00:03:59,382
It is especially gratifying to be
surrounded by such good friends...

56
00:03:59,554 --> 00:04:00,680
...and family...

57
00:04:01,056 --> 00:04:05,186
...and of course,
our two beautiful daughters...

58
00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:06,657
...Sadie...

59
00:04:06,828 --> 00:04:08,420
...and Lindsey...

60
00:04:08,597 --> 00:04:10,690
...who has moved back home with us...

61
00:04:12,301 --> 00:04:14,394
...to try and make a new start for herself.

62
00:04:14,569 --> 00:04:15,729
We are...

63
00:04:16,638 --> 00:04:19,664
...so thrilled with her perseverance.

64
00:04:20,876 --> 00:04:22,844
Thank you for the support, Dad.

65
00:04:25,314 --> 00:04:29,216
And then there's Carlisle, Sadie's best
friend, who used to take baths with Sadie...

66
00:04:29,384 --> 00:04:30,851
- What?
- What?

67
00:04:31,019 --> 00:04:36,013
...when they were younger,
and pretend he was a submarine captain.

68
00:04:36,191 --> 00:04:38,682
I destroyed all the photos.
I promise you.

69
00:04:38,860 --> 00:04:41,852
- Thank you.
Very good to know. Thanks.
- Wait, what?

70
00:04:42,030 --> 00:04:44,089
And our good friends,
Don and Gwen...

71
00:04:44,266 --> 00:04:46,131
...Kwan-Li...

72
00:04:46,301 --> 00:04:47,791
...Jerry, Otis.

73
00:04:48,136 --> 00:04:49,728
Dad...

74
00:04:50,272 --> 00:04:51,261
...what about...

75
00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:53,271
- What about Ben?
- Oh, no, no, no.

76
00:04:54,242 --> 00:04:58,440
Oh, and of course, there's
Sadie's affable boyfriend, Ben.

77
00:04:59,514 --> 00:05:01,038
But what I really want to do...

78
00:05:01,216 --> 00:05:03,616
...is thank my beautiful wife...

79
00:05:04,219 --> 00:05:09,054
...without whom this life
would mean nothing.

80
00:05:09,257 --> 00:05:11,851
Happy 30th anniversary.

81
00:05:14,396 --> 00:05:15,988
- I love you.
- I love you too.

82
00:05:16,164 --> 00:05:18,223
And I hope there are 30 more.

83
00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,800
Well, that makes one of us.

84
00:05:29,544 --> 00:05:31,978
Excuse me.
Could I have everyone's attention, please?

85
00:05:33,715 --> 00:05:35,239
I just wanted to...

86
00:05:41,690 --> 00:05:44,386
Well, I thought since
everyone was gathered...

87
00:05:44,559 --> 00:05:46,618
...gathered already...

88
00:05:49,765 --> 00:05:51,130
Oh, my God.

89
00:05:52,567 --> 00:05:53,556
Oh, my God.

90
00:05:53,735 --> 00:05:55,669
- Sadie...
- Oh, my God, oh, my God.

91
00:05:55,837 --> 00:05:57,464
...Wilhelmina Jones.

92
00:05:59,274 --> 00:06:04,177
In front of God and your family...

93
00:06:04,513 --> 00:06:10,281
...Kwan-Li, and Jerry and Otis and...

94
00:06:12,354 --> 00:06:14,549
I just want to know...

95
00:06:14,723 --> 00:06:17,692
...if you would spend the rest
of your life with me.

96
00:06:20,195 --> 00:06:21,253
But I don't...

97
00:06:21,430 --> 00:06:23,625
I don't want to put you
on the spot or anything.

98
00:06:23,799 --> 00:06:28,759
Benjamin Murphy, I would marry you
tomorrow in a potato-sack dress...

99
00:06:28,937 --> 00:06:33,340
...in the middle of a rainstorm, if it meant
I could spend the rest of my life with you.

100
00:06:38,914 --> 00:06:40,142
Wait a second.

101
00:06:41,149 --> 00:06:47,418
You choose our 30th wedding anniversary
to propose to my daughter?

102
00:06:50,192 --> 00:06:51,659
Well...

103
00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:54,060
...we couldn't be happier.

104
00:06:54,229 --> 00:06:56,356
Oh, my gosh.

105
00:06:56,531 --> 00:06:57,725
I know.

106
00:06:59,568 --> 00:07:01,536
New brother-in-law-to-be, I guess.

107
00:07:01,703 --> 00:07:03,830
- Oh, man. Hey, hello.
- Awkward.

108
00:07:04,005 --> 00:07:05,870
- Welcome.
- Thank you.

109
00:07:07,776 --> 00:07:09,903
- Welcome to the family, Ben.
- Sir. All right!

110
00:07:10,078 --> 00:07:12,569
- Oh, my baby.
- Oh, honey, I'm so happy for you.

111
00:07:12,747 --> 00:07:14,806
Look at this beautiful ring.

112
00:07:14,983 --> 00:07:17,042
Sadie, Sadie, I was thinking...

113
00:07:17,452 --> 00:07:21,081
I think we should have the wedding
somewhere tropical. I was thinking, like...

114
00:07:21,256 --> 00:07:22,723
...the Caribbean.

115
00:07:22,891 --> 00:07:24,620
I have this one thing.

116
00:07:26,761 --> 00:07:28,251
Okay.

117
00:07:28,430 --> 00:07:30,057
I always wanted
to get married here.

118
00:07:31,466 --> 00:07:34,299
Here.
What do you mean?

119
00:07:34,469 --> 00:07:35,697
At Saint Augustine's.

120
00:07:35,871 --> 00:07:39,363
It's this fantasy I've had
since I was a little girl.

121
00:07:39,541 --> 00:07:41,406
It's the church where
John and I married.

122
00:07:41,576 --> 00:07:44,841
Where Sadie was christened by
Reverend Frank, who's known us forever.

123
00:07:45,013 --> 00:07:48,210
More importantly, it's the church
Sadie's grandfather built.

124
00:07:49,484 --> 00:07:50,610
Her dead grandfather.

125
00:07:50,785 --> 00:07:54,721
Oh, give me a break.
All he built was a door after it was stolen.

126
00:07:54,890 --> 00:07:56,983
How would you know?
You weren't married there.

127
00:07:57,159 --> 00:07:59,286
And we all know
how that marriage turned out.

128
00:07:59,461 --> 00:08:00,928
Mom!

129
00:08:01,096 --> 00:08:03,724
- Stop.
- Here, here, here, here.

130
00:08:03,899 --> 00:08:06,265
Babe, you've made me so
unbelievably happy today.

131
00:08:06,434 --> 00:08:07,423
You have no idea.

132
00:08:07,636 --> 00:08:09,001
- Great.
- Yeah.

133
00:08:09,171 --> 00:08:11,765
Then Saint Augustine's...

134
00:08:11,940 --> 00:08:14,909
...is the decision.
- Thank you, I love you.

135
00:08:15,210 --> 00:08:17,235
- You ready?
- I'm missing a shoe.

136
00:08:17,412 --> 00:08:19,972
- Well, where did you last see it?
- I don't know.

137
00:08:20,148 --> 00:08:22,639
You know, Ben,
your sweater's actually inside out?

138
00:08:22,817 --> 00:08:24,808
Gotta fix that.

139
00:08:24,986 --> 00:08:26,317
What would you do without me?

140
00:08:26,488 --> 00:08:28,854
You want the short list or the long list?

141
00:08:29,024 --> 00:08:30,889
Oh, and your belt?

142
00:08:31,059 --> 00:08:33,118
- It's a little funny.
- No, my belt's fine.

143
00:08:35,063 --> 00:08:36,087
Wait a minute.

144
00:08:36,264 --> 00:08:38,289
- We're gonna be really late.
- No, we're not.

145
00:08:38,466 --> 00:08:39,694
Yeah, we are.

146
00:08:39,868 --> 00:08:41,893
And your point is?

147
00:08:50,545 --> 00:08:51,773
How do I look?

148
00:08:51,947 --> 00:08:54,575
- You look like you've just been...
- All right, never mind.

149
00:08:54,749 --> 00:08:56,580
We're so going to hell, you know that?

150
00:08:56,751 --> 00:09:00,517
- Hey, here's the door Grandpa built.
- Wow, he does really good work.

151
00:09:16,338 --> 00:09:18,169
Don't touch that!

152
00:09:18,506 --> 00:09:20,269
Jesus! You scared me.

153
00:09:20,709 --> 00:09:23,200
Jesus didn't scare you, I did.

154
00:09:24,112 --> 00:09:27,548
- Hi, I'm Sadie...
- Sadie Jones. Yes, I know.

155
00:09:27,716 --> 00:09:29,513
You have a 10:30 with Reverend Frank.

156
00:09:29,718 --> 00:09:31,015
Yeah. Is he here?

157
00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:33,547
Reverend Frank is everywhere.

158
00:09:33,722 --> 00:09:35,383
Follow me.

159
00:09:39,995 --> 00:09:41,724
<i>"Dear ELLE magazine:</i>

160
00:09:41,896 --> 00:09:44,387
I just found out that my husband
of three months...

161
00:09:44,566 --> 00:09:47,034
...is cheating on me with my best friend.

162
00:09:47,202 --> 00:09:51,104
Half of me wants to kill him, the other
half wants to salvage my marriage.

163
00:09:51,273 --> 00:09:52,331
What to do?"

164
00:09:52,507 --> 00:09:53,496
Yikes.

165
00:09:53,675 --> 00:09:55,939
What kind of sins are we
dealing with here, guys?

166
00:09:56,111 --> 00:09:58,443
- Sarah.
- Thou shall not commit adultery?

167
00:09:58,613 --> 00:10:01,707
Adultery. Going out for milk
when you have jugs at home.

168
00:10:01,883 --> 00:10:03,976
Show me adultery!

169
00:10:05,420 --> 00:10:07,752
Not neat to cheat! Okay!

170
00:10:07,922 --> 00:10:09,480
Now, a lot of people ask me:

171
00:10:09,658 --> 00:10:12,456
"What if I'm cheating with a woman
who's really, really ugly?

172
00:10:12,627 --> 00:10:13,958
Does that make it all right?"

173
00:10:14,129 --> 00:10:16,893
No, it does not make it all right.
It is still a sin.

174
00:10:17,399 --> 00:10:19,094
What other sins? Anybody?

175
00:10:19,267 --> 00:10:22,031
Don't hesitate to draw on
your parents' bad examples.

176
00:10:22,203 --> 00:10:25,331
- Laurie. Bring it, girl.
- Thou shall not covet thy neighbor's wife.

177
00:10:25,540 --> 00:10:28,873
Starts with coveting, ends with the clap.

178
00:10:29,044 --> 00:10:30,978
Okay, coveting thy neighbor's wife.

179
00:10:31,146 --> 00:10:34,081
That's why God invented
the cold shower. Show me coveting!

180
00:10:36,885 --> 00:10:38,375
Good one, Laurie!

181
00:10:38,553 --> 00:10:41,818
Okay, there's one answer left on the board.
Let's see.

182
00:10:41,990 --> 00:10:43,355
Manny.

183
00:10:45,627 --> 00:10:47,458
Make your two moms proud.

184
00:10:49,597 --> 00:10:52,691
Come on, Manny,
you can murder this one.

185
00:10:53,635 --> 00:10:57,662
While I'm waiting, maybe I'll just
fashion a shiv out of Cindy's barrette.

186
00:10:59,741 --> 00:11:02,107
Take a stab at it.

187
00:11:04,512 --> 00:11:06,139
Thou shall not kill?

188
00:11:06,581 --> 00:11:08,811
Boom, Manny!
Bang, bang, bang!

189
00:11:10,118 --> 00:11:11,915
Show me thou shall not kill!

190
00:11:13,488 --> 00:11:16,355
Oh, good one, Manny!
Manny, Manny, Manny.

191
00:11:16,524 --> 00:11:17,650
That's it for today.

192
00:11:17,826 --> 00:11:20,056
Next we're gonna take
a trip to Arlington Park.

193
00:11:20,228 --> 00:11:23,026
We're gonna find out about
the evils of gambling firsthand.

194
00:11:23,198 --> 00:11:24,825
So bring at least a dollar...

195
00:11:24,999 --> 00:11:28,332
...and remember to ask Mom and Dad
what a trifecta is.

196
00:11:31,940 --> 00:11:34,568
I don't know if you remember me,
Reverend Frank, but...

197
00:11:34,743 --> 00:11:36,643
Sadie Jones?

198
00:11:36,811 --> 00:11:38,711
Little Sadie Jones.

199
00:11:38,880 --> 00:11:40,575
- How you've grown.
- Well, yeah.

200
00:11:40,749 --> 00:11:43,183
And now my Sadie Jones
is gonna tie the knot.

201
00:11:43,351 --> 00:11:44,340
I am.

202
00:11:44,519 --> 00:11:46,749
I'm sorry I haven't been around
for the last...

203
00:11:46,921 --> 00:11:47,910
Ten years.

204
00:11:48,089 --> 00:11:49,078
Yeah.

205
00:11:49,257 --> 00:11:51,191
I've just been trying to get
my business...

206
00:11:51,359 --> 00:11:52,690
Oh, please.

207
00:11:52,894 --> 00:11:55,158
You go to college,
you have a bisexual roommate...

208
00:11:55,330 --> 00:11:57,161
...you forget about God.
Don't sweat it.

209
00:11:57,332 --> 00:11:58,629
He doesn't forget about you.

210
00:12:01,269 --> 00:12:02,759
Who are you?

211
00:12:03,605 --> 00:12:04,594
I'm Ben.

212
00:12:04,773 --> 00:12:05,762
- Ben.
- Hi.

213
00:12:05,940 --> 00:12:08,636
So, what do you do,
besides little Sadie here?

214
00:12:11,346 --> 00:12:12,335
How are you?

215
00:12:12,781 --> 00:12:15,682
All right, let's get the flock out of here.
Come on.

216
00:12:15,850 --> 00:12:17,442
So, how long you two been an item?

217
00:12:17,619 --> 00:12:19,553
- About...
- Like...

218
00:12:19,721 --> 00:12:21,552
Yeah!

219
00:12:23,658 --> 00:12:25,387
It's been teetering there for weeks.

220
00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:27,027
- Cheesy Curl?
- No, thank you.

221
00:12:27,195 --> 00:12:29,186
Too bad, they're addicting.

222
00:12:33,201 --> 00:12:34,930
- Booked.
- Booked. Booked.

223
00:12:35,103 --> 00:12:36,695
Nothing there or there.

224
00:12:36,871 --> 00:12:38,202
I am popular.

225
00:12:38,373 --> 00:12:40,364
Yes, you are.

226
00:12:41,176 --> 00:12:43,872
All full. Not looking good. No.

227
00:12:45,213 --> 00:12:48,011
No, no, no.

228
00:12:48,183 --> 00:12:51,380
- Nope, nope, nope.
- Booked, booked, booked.

229
00:13:00,595 --> 00:13:02,119
Bad news, guys.

230
00:13:02,297 --> 00:13:04,891
- Next available date is in two years.
- Two years?

231
00:13:05,934 --> 00:13:06,923
That's...

232
00:13:07,602 --> 00:13:09,365
...so long.
- Yeah.

233
00:13:10,371 --> 00:13:11,963
Wait.

234
00:13:12,407 --> 00:13:14,705
- Hold on, hold on.
- Wasn't there a cancellation?

235
00:13:15,376 --> 00:13:17,742
- I think it's...
- There, there!

236
00:13:17,912 --> 00:13:19,072
Yes, there it is.

237
00:13:19,247 --> 00:13:21,340
Three weeks from tomorrow, how is that?

238
00:13:23,384 --> 00:13:25,784
That's a little quick.
Right? I mean...

239
00:13:28,056 --> 00:13:30,388
Okay, I guess we're getting married
in three weeks.

240
00:13:30,558 --> 00:13:32,253
Okay.

241
00:13:32,427 --> 00:13:33,724
- Just like that?
- Yeah.

242
00:13:33,895 --> 00:13:37,854
- So it is written, so it shall be done.
- So it shall be done.

243
00:13:38,099 --> 00:13:40,294
Oh, boy.

244
00:13:40,468 --> 00:13:42,129
All right.

245
00:13:42,403 --> 00:13:44,667
One small thing.

246
00:13:44,839 --> 00:13:48,400
Couple years ago I instituted
a marriage preparation course here.

247
00:13:48,576 --> 00:13:51,272
The course is a prerequisite
for all marriage ceremonies...

248
00:13:51,446 --> 00:13:53,778
...performed on these grounds.

249
00:13:54,015 --> 00:13:56,677
At the end of the course,
if I feel you're unprepared...

250
00:13:56,851 --> 00:14:01,413
...or you stop the course before completion,
I have the right to call off the wedding.

251
00:14:01,589 --> 00:14:06,049
I'm sorry, but this isn't mandatory, right?
Because we're so ready to get married.

252
00:14:06,227 --> 00:14:08,320
- More than most.
- We strongly advise it.

253
00:14:08,496 --> 00:14:10,589
In other words, you have no choice.

254
00:14:10,899 --> 00:14:12,594
With the divorce rate what it is...

255
00:14:12,767 --> 00:14:13,927
50 percent.

256
00:14:14,102 --> 00:14:16,297
Much higher for those
who live together first.

257
00:14:16,638 --> 00:14:18,799
You did say you lived together, right?

258
00:14:20,341 --> 00:14:22,206
I'm sorry, who are you again?

259
00:14:22,377 --> 00:14:24,470
I'm part of the Ministers
of Tomorrow program.

260
00:14:24,646 --> 00:14:26,341
Reverend Frank's my mentor.

261
00:14:26,514 --> 00:14:27,776
My little Mensa.

262
00:14:27,949 --> 00:14:29,814
- I can see.
- Listen, kids.

263
00:14:29,984 --> 00:14:32,646
We wanna make sure you
are making the right decision...

264
00:14:32,820 --> 00:14:35,288
...because your future happiness
depends on it.

265
00:14:35,456 --> 00:14:37,617
Reverend Frank has a hundred
percent success...

266
00:14:37,792 --> 00:14:39,987
...for those that make it
through the course.

267
00:14:40,161 --> 00:14:42,629
- But what about the people who...?
- Okay, we'll do it.

268
00:14:43,831 --> 00:14:45,890
- We're gonna do it.
- We're doing that?

269
00:14:46,067 --> 00:14:47,534
- It's awesome.
- We're doing this.

270
00:14:47,735 --> 00:14:48,793
That's my Sadie.

271
00:14:49,470 --> 00:14:53,031
All right, we have three months of prep
to cram into three weeks.

272
00:14:53,207 --> 00:14:54,697
There's only a few rules.

273
00:14:54,876 --> 00:14:57,777
Rule number one:
you each have to write your own vows.

274
00:14:57,946 --> 00:15:00,141
You have a booklet,
and you share these vows...

275
00:15:00,315 --> 00:15:02,510
...with each other at the ceremony.

276
00:15:03,551 --> 00:15:05,815
- That's really cool.
- Isn't it?

277
00:15:05,987 --> 00:15:07,454
Okay. What's rule number two?

278
00:15:07,622 --> 00:15:09,988
Starting immediately,
no sex until the honeymoon.

279
00:15:11,993 --> 00:15:13,620
I...

280
00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:20,492
Are you serious?

281
00:15:21,069 --> 00:15:22,366
Oh, yeah.

282
00:15:24,606 --> 00:15:26,267
Tomorrow morning,
bright and early.

283
00:15:26,441 --> 00:15:27,430
Be there.

284
00:15:27,609 --> 00:15:29,338
We all remember the 11 th Commandment.

285
00:15:29,510 --> 00:15:30,738
I don't.

286
00:15:31,646 --> 00:15:33,341
Thou shall not be late.

287
00:15:36,884 --> 00:15:39,182
We've got a hundred things
to start, but it's doable.

288
00:15:39,354 --> 00:15:41,447
I just have to get Carlisle on the phone.

289
00:15:41,623 --> 00:15:45,457
- He was kidding about the no-sex thing?
- Carlisle? It's me. Get ready for this.

290
00:15:45,627 --> 00:15:48,187
- We will talk about the no-sex thing later.
- Okay, Ben.

291
00:15:48,363 --> 00:15:50,092
No sex?

292
00:15:50,264 --> 00:15:53,165
That's supposed to happen
after you get married.

293
00:15:53,534 --> 00:15:54,558
Joel, I come here...

294
00:15:54,736 --> 00:15:57,068
...for your compassion.
- I'm just giving you shit.

295
00:15:57,238 --> 00:15:59,729
Congratulations.
You are going to love marriage.

296
00:15:59,907 --> 00:16:01,807
Damn it, Joel.
What is wrong with you?

297
00:16:01,976 --> 00:16:04,103
You were supposed to be
watching them.

298
00:16:04,278 --> 00:16:05,905
Shelly, baby, I'm on the roof.

299
00:16:06,080 --> 00:16:08,742
Remember we said you won't
bother me when I'm on the roof?

300
00:16:08,916 --> 00:16:11,009
- You're always on the roof.
- Exactly.

301
00:16:11,185 --> 00:16:12,982
- I heard that.
- Yeah.

302
00:16:13,154 --> 00:16:15,019
Where did this mud hole
even come from?

303
00:16:15,189 --> 00:16:17,885
Oh, my God,
I am so getting my tubes tied.

304
00:16:18,059 --> 00:16:22,223
This reverend says he wants me to meet
him after church tomorrow one-on-one.

305
00:16:22,997 --> 00:16:24,589
What is that?

306
00:16:24,766 --> 00:16:26,757
You ever done that?
The marriage prep stuff?

307
00:16:26,934 --> 00:16:29,994
To tell you the truth, I don't remember
anything before D-day, man.

308
00:16:30,638 --> 00:16:32,196
It's like a black hole.

309
00:16:32,373 --> 00:16:34,807
All I know is that's my wife...

310
00:16:34,976 --> 00:16:36,637
...apparently those are my kids...

311
00:16:36,811 --> 00:16:39,609
...and this, this is my beer.

312
00:16:39,781 --> 00:16:42,511
Everything else is pretty much a blur.

313
00:16:43,117 --> 00:16:44,209
Yeah.

314
00:16:45,086 --> 00:16:46,348
Thank you.

315
00:16:46,521 --> 00:16:48,011
That's why you're my best man.

316
00:16:49,123 --> 00:16:50,920
Two words for your bachelor party:

317
00:16:51,092 --> 00:16:52,650
Strippers and Sizzler.

318
00:16:54,195 --> 00:16:56,095
I like to call it "beef and booty."

319
00:16:56,264 --> 00:16:58,357
I heard that.

320
00:17:00,601 --> 00:17:01,590
Oh, boy.

321
00:17:07,341 --> 00:17:09,571
Please, God, let somebody
be later than us.

322
00:17:09,744 --> 00:17:14,044
Hey. We'll just sneak in the back,
no one will notice.

323
00:17:14,449 --> 00:17:16,007
We also ask...

324
00:17:16,184 --> 00:17:20,211
...that you watch over the Mansbridge
meat packers and their labor dispute.

325
00:17:20,388 --> 00:17:23,983
Grant our packers patience
as they await an amicable resolution...

326
00:17:24,392 --> 00:17:27,793
...with, Lord willing,
a four to six percent pay increase...

327
00:17:27,962 --> 00:17:29,793
...and dental would be nice.

328
00:17:34,836 --> 00:17:37,464
Look who decided to show.

329
00:17:39,807 --> 00:17:42,742
Choir! Let me hear it!

330
00:17:42,944 --> 00:17:46,607
<i>You're late, you're late
You're late, you're late</i>

331
00:17:46,781 --> 00:17:49,978
<i>God's on time</i>

332
00:17:50,151 --> 00:17:53,780
<i>But you are very late</i>

333
00:17:55,623 --> 00:17:58,717
It's your first offense.
We'll let it slide.

334
00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:02,020
It happens again, I'm telling the Big Guy.

335
00:18:02,196 --> 00:18:05,097
And I'm not talking about
Larry Carmichael over there on drums.

336
00:18:06,501 --> 00:18:08,366
But seriously...

337
00:18:08,736 --> 00:18:11,204
...let us re-pray.

338
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:15,739
Sorry for bailing, Lord.
A brief interruption, but we're back.

339
00:18:15,910 --> 00:18:17,810
We'd also like to pray for Walter...

340
00:18:17,979 --> 00:18:20,243
...recently returned from his
holiday in Thailand.

341
00:18:20,414 --> 00:18:22,075
Let's hope it's just a heat rash.

342
00:18:23,017 --> 00:18:25,247
- Vivian.
- I don't know how you do it, Frank.

343
00:18:25,419 --> 00:18:27,546
Every week your sermons
get better and better.

344
00:18:27,722 --> 00:18:31,055
It comes from upstairs, Vivian.
I'm just the TiVo.

345
00:18:31,759 --> 00:18:33,124
It wasn't that good.

346
00:18:33,294 --> 00:18:34,454
- You ready?
- Yeah.

347
00:18:35,763 --> 00:18:37,560
I have to go. I have stuff to do...

348
00:18:37,732 --> 00:18:40,098
...but you guys enjoy
your man-talk, okay?

349
00:18:40,268 --> 00:18:42,327
Don't say anything about me
behind my back.

350
00:18:42,503 --> 00:18:45,028
You'll never know so...

351
00:18:45,506 --> 00:18:46,666
Tight.

352
00:18:46,841 --> 00:18:48,433
- Sorry?
- The car.

353
00:18:48,943 --> 00:18:51,207
- Hi.
- Bye.

354
00:18:52,213 --> 00:18:54,238
You ready? A little one-on-one?

355
00:18:54,415 --> 00:18:56,076
- Yeah.
- Come on. Let's go.

356
00:18:56,250 --> 00:18:58,013
The name of our team is the Crusaders.

357
00:18:58,186 --> 00:19:02,350
I didn't want to tell the kids about the
Children's Crusades, it bums them out.

358
00:19:02,523 --> 00:19:04,548
Wow, you really meant one-on-one.

359
00:19:04,725 --> 00:19:06,317
Oh, yeah.

360
00:19:06,694 --> 00:19:08,025
- A little hoops?
- No.

361
00:19:08,196 --> 00:19:09,322
This ball needs Viagra.

362
00:19:10,765 --> 00:19:12,426
- Play catch?
- Sure, love catch.

363
00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:14,830
It's my favorite sport.

364
00:19:15,002 --> 00:19:17,266
Pardon the glove.
We've had a few budget cutbacks.

365
00:19:17,438 --> 00:19:19,099
- Oh, that's all right.
- Back up.

366
00:19:19,674 --> 00:19:20,902
Okay.

367
00:19:21,075 --> 00:19:23,600
What are you, a little girl's softball league?
Back up.

368
00:19:23,778 --> 00:19:25,177
Okay. Not a little girl.

369
00:19:25,346 --> 00:19:26,677
- Yeah.
- All right.

370
00:19:26,848 --> 00:19:28,713
It's nice to be able to chat with you...

371
00:19:28,883 --> 00:19:32,114
...without all this "I'm a pastor
who can send you to hell" nonsense.

372
00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:33,714
No, me too. This is great.

373
00:19:33,888 --> 00:19:36,152
Little one-on-one time
with your spiritual elder.

374
00:19:37,091 --> 00:19:39,025
Bless you, Benjamin.

375
00:19:40,161 --> 00:19:42,629
- Too hard?
- No. That's a...

376
00:19:42,797 --> 00:19:44,492
That's a good burn. Right?

377
00:19:44,665 --> 00:19:47,395
Anything that's painful
makes you stronger.

378
00:19:47,568 --> 00:19:50,435
Not really. You break your leg,
your leg doesn't get stronger.

379
00:19:50,605 --> 00:19:52,800
God is just, but God is kind.

380
00:19:54,842 --> 00:19:56,867
That's a nice sentiment.

381
00:19:57,645 --> 00:19:59,340
Thank you.
Can I ask you something?

382
00:19:59,513 --> 00:20:01,003
- Sure.
- Sadie.

383
00:20:01,182 --> 00:20:02,774
Why do you love her?

384
00:20:04,085 --> 00:20:05,916
There's just so many reasons, you know?

385
00:20:06,087 --> 00:20:08,555
She's beautiful, inside and out.

386
00:20:08,723 --> 00:20:10,418
So, I'm lucky.

387
00:20:10,591 --> 00:20:12,650
What do you mean by "inside"?

388
00:20:13,828 --> 00:20:15,352
You meant spiritually, right?

389
00:20:15,529 --> 00:20:17,224
Yep. Exactly.

390
00:20:17,398 --> 00:20:19,423
Okay. What else?

391
00:20:21,269 --> 00:20:25,035
She's just smart, you know?
She's motivated, she's well-organized.

392
00:20:25,206 --> 00:20:27,106
She's probably
the hardest worker I know.

393
00:20:28,175 --> 00:20:31,042
Well, let me get this straight, then.
Correct me if I'm wrong.

394
00:20:31,212 --> 00:20:34,340
First thing you like about her is her looks.
But you really think...

395
00:20:34,515 --> 00:20:36,881
...she's a cute control freak.
- I didn't say that.

396
00:20:37,051 --> 00:20:41,647
- I know what you're getting at.
- "Organized" is code for OCD.

397
00:20:41,822 --> 00:20:43,380
OCD is a...

398
00:20:43,557 --> 00:20:44,649
God!

399
00:20:46,661 --> 00:20:48,788
Oh, my Lord.

400
00:20:49,397 --> 00:20:50,762
- You okay, big fella?
- Yeah.

401
00:20:50,932 --> 00:20:52,092
Oh, yeah?

402
00:20:52,266 --> 00:20:53,733
- How you doing...
- Totally fine.

403
00:20:53,901 --> 00:20:56,392
Let's see that. Come on.
Oh, no. That's bad.

404
00:20:56,570 --> 00:20:57,867
I'm gonna have to heal you.

405
00:20:58,439 --> 00:21:00,703
- No, that's okay.
- No. I'm gonna have to heal you.

406
00:21:00,875 --> 00:21:03,241
- I just need Advil.
- It's healing time. Stay down.

407
00:21:03,411 --> 00:21:05,345
Stay down. It's healing time.

408
00:21:05,780 --> 00:21:07,509
- What's that mean?
- Oh, Jesus Christ.

409
00:21:07,682 --> 00:21:10,708
Oh, Lord, surround him
with your light and grace.

410
00:21:10,885 --> 00:21:12,409
Lord have mercy!

411
00:21:12,586 --> 00:21:14,918
- The power of Christ compels you!
- Lord have mercy.

412
00:21:15,089 --> 00:21:16,716
The power of Christ compels you!

413
00:21:16,891 --> 00:21:19,223
- We have got to pray!
- Pray!

414
00:21:19,393 --> 00:21:20,951
- We have got to pray!
- Pray!

415
00:21:21,128 --> 00:21:23,255
We have got to pray to make it
through the day!

416
00:21:23,831 --> 00:21:24,855
Is that MC Hammer?

417
00:21:25,266 --> 00:21:28,258
- You're healed, right?
- Let me see. Let me see.

418
00:21:28,436 --> 00:21:31,803
- No, it's still bleeding.
- Let's go old school.

419
00:21:34,075 --> 00:21:36,339
Begone, demon spirit!

420
00:21:36,510 --> 00:21:38,239
Begone!

421
00:21:39,480 --> 00:21:42,472
- That's not helping at all.
- Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

422
00:21:42,650 --> 00:21:44,277
Lord, take him up upon your wing...

423
00:21:44,452 --> 00:21:47,012
- Wait, take me where?
- lf you believed, you'd be healed.

424
00:21:47,188 --> 00:21:48,587
- Do you believe?
- Believe!

425
00:21:48,756 --> 00:21:50,849
- Believe!
- I'm healed, I'm healed, I'm healed.

426
00:21:51,025 --> 00:21:53,789
- Oh, it's a miracle! It's a miracle!
- It is. It is.

427
00:21:53,961 --> 00:21:56,259
You're not healed.
I'm not a doctor, I'm a pastor.

428
00:21:56,430 --> 00:21:59,263
You know what you need?
Advil and ice. Come on.

429
00:21:59,433 --> 00:22:03,369
- Check him out, just see that he's okay.
- The nasal septum and concha are clear.

430
00:22:03,537 --> 00:22:07,029
- Good news, kid. Your nose is fine.
- Yeah, come on. Let me buy you a Coke.

431
00:22:07,208 --> 00:22:09,642
Sorry about that.
You know, I have to try that stuff.

432
00:22:09,810 --> 00:22:12,938
- Never works, but what if it had?
- Yeah.

433
00:22:13,114 --> 00:22:14,911
- Wouldn't that be crazy?
- Crazy.

434
00:22:16,150 --> 00:22:18,209
It was great.

435
00:22:18,386 --> 00:22:20,980
Yes, totally.
Reverend Frank is the best.

436
00:22:21,155 --> 00:22:24,181
Listen, tomorrow night, I was th...

437
00:22:24,759 --> 00:22:27,819
Group counseling for what?

438
00:22:33,334 --> 00:22:34,699
Okay, like we do every week.

439
00:22:34,869 --> 00:22:37,531
Danny, pick up Tenika
and carry her across that threshold.

440
00:22:37,705 --> 00:22:39,002
Yeah, that's it!

441
00:22:39,173 --> 00:22:41,505
Try and think of it like the first time.

442
00:22:41,675 --> 00:22:43,802
For a lot of you,
that wasn't the honeymoon.

443
00:22:45,279 --> 00:22:47,679
Yeah, baby. Come on, Jim.

444
00:22:47,848 --> 00:22:49,008
My back is giving out.

445
00:22:49,183 --> 00:22:50,377
Don't focus on the pain.

446
00:22:50,551 --> 00:22:53,679
Look at the love that
Janine's giving you right now.

447
00:22:53,854 --> 00:22:56,448
And if that doesn't work,
think about potato skins.

448
00:22:56,991 --> 00:22:58,982
God, I love potato skins.

449
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:01,287
A husband will do anything
for appetizers.

450
00:23:01,462 --> 00:23:02,520
Yes.

451
00:23:04,231 --> 00:23:06,859
Everybody, I want to introduce you
to two new members.

452
00:23:07,034 --> 00:23:09,901
This is Ben and Sadie.
They're getting married in three weeks.

453
00:23:10,071 --> 00:23:12,505
Ben, why don't you carry Sadie
across the threshold?

454
00:23:13,074 --> 00:23:14,598
Come on.

455
00:23:14,975 --> 00:23:17,842
Come on. Yeah, come on.

456
00:23:18,679 --> 00:23:20,840
Yeah, there you go.
Get across that threshold!

457
00:23:27,354 --> 00:23:29,049
Hurry.

458
00:23:29,890 --> 00:23:33,326
- Oh, great.
- Look.

459
00:23:56,383 --> 00:23:58,112
Got it.

460
00:24:02,156 --> 00:24:03,316
Tonight...

461
00:24:03,491 --> 00:24:06,085
...we learn how to fight fairly.

462
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:07,749
Sorry.

463
00:24:07,928 --> 00:24:10,260
What if we've never had a fight before?

464
00:24:11,198 --> 00:24:13,666
- Seriously think I'm gonna puke.
- Louise, no puking.

465
00:24:13,834 --> 00:24:16,496
They're young.
They're allowed to be enthusiastic.

466
00:24:17,004 --> 00:24:19,404
Never had a fight,
it's about time you had one.

467
00:24:19,573 --> 00:24:21,973
So please, step up
to the top of the circle.

468
00:24:22,143 --> 00:24:24,008
Come on, get your butts up there!

469
00:24:24,178 --> 00:24:26,942
Let's get this perfect relationship
on its feet.

470
00:24:27,114 --> 00:24:29,378
Put it to the test. Okay.

471
00:24:29,550 --> 00:24:31,245
I want you to imagine.

472
00:24:31,418 --> 00:24:33,818
You're driving in the mountains.
It's nighttime.

473
00:24:33,988 --> 00:24:35,853
But there's a torrential downpour.

474
00:24:36,023 --> 00:24:37,752
That thing with the wipers like this:

475
00:24:38,425 --> 00:24:40,393
You're tired. You're lost.

476
00:24:40,794 --> 00:24:42,159
You're getting cranky.

477
00:24:42,630 --> 00:24:44,461
What was that?

478
00:24:44,632 --> 00:24:46,964
You got a flat tire
because you just hit a pothole.

479
00:24:47,334 --> 00:24:49,529
Instant argument potential.

480
00:24:49,703 --> 00:24:51,432
What do you do? How do you handle it?

481
00:24:52,072 --> 00:24:54,006
I think we'd probably just call AAA.

482
00:24:55,242 --> 00:24:58,678
Out of cell phone range.
Can't use the cell phone. Can't call AAA.

483
00:24:58,846 --> 00:25:02,043
You gotta handle it the old-fashioned way.
You gotta change the tire.

484
00:25:02,216 --> 00:25:05,083
You're pissed at each other. Go.

485
00:25:07,922 --> 00:25:11,119
Sorry I didn't see that pothole.

486
00:25:11,592 --> 00:25:13,116
It's okay, honey.

487
00:25:13,294 --> 00:25:16,263
Accidents happen,
so just be more careful next time.

488
00:25:16,430 --> 00:25:18,489
- Promise I will.
- Cut!

489
00:25:18,666 --> 00:25:21,726
You guys travel medicated?
That was like "Prozac Takes a Vacation."

490
00:25:21,902 --> 00:25:23,597
That's not what we're looking for.

491
00:25:23,771 --> 00:25:27,867
Janine, why don't you and Jimbo show
them how this argument should play out?

492
00:25:28,042 --> 00:25:29,532
Sure.

493
00:25:33,981 --> 00:25:35,448
Hey, jackass!

494
00:25:35,616 --> 00:25:38,881
I told you to take Route 45,
but again, you didn't listen!

495
00:25:39,053 --> 00:25:43,319
Now it's pissing down outside
and we're stuck God only knows where.

496
00:25:43,490 --> 00:25:46,391
Yeah, well, if we hadn't
left three hours late...

497
00:25:46,560 --> 00:25:50,519
...because someone was talking
to her ball-busting mother on the phone...

498
00:25:51,065 --> 00:25:53,659
...well, then, maybe we wouldn't
be in this position!

499
00:25:53,834 --> 00:25:56,359
You are a sad, sad man.

500
00:25:56,537 --> 00:25:59,665
You will not emasculate me anymore.

501
00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:02,001
- Go to hell!
- No, you go to hell, Janine.

502
00:26:02,176 --> 00:26:05,407
- Go to hell.
- Okay. Cut.

503
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:08,048
Everybody, Jim and Janine.

504
00:26:10,351 --> 00:26:12,683
We're gonna try something
a little different now.

505
00:26:12,853 --> 00:26:15,413
We're gonna do role reversal.

506
00:26:16,023 --> 00:26:17,354
All right.

507
00:26:17,524 --> 00:26:19,355
Sadie, I want you to be Ben.

508
00:26:19,526 --> 00:26:22,120
Ben, I want you to be Sadie.
Come on. Step up there.

509
00:26:22,296 --> 00:26:23,957
Come on, get up! Yeah!

510
00:26:24,131 --> 00:26:26,395
- Oh, gosh.
- Come on.

511
00:26:26,567 --> 00:26:28,034
You're gonna change the tire.

512
00:26:28,202 --> 00:26:29,999
Ben, tire's down here.

513
00:26:30,170 --> 00:26:32,434
You're down in that muck.
Here's your lug wrench.

514
00:26:32,606 --> 00:26:34,767
The lugs are right here.
But they're tight.

515
00:26:34,942 --> 00:26:38,844
They're rusty, they're old, all right?
You can't get them off and you're angry...

516
00:26:39,013 --> 00:26:42,744
...and you're cold, and you really...
You wanna tear each other apart.

517
00:26:42,916 --> 00:26:44,406
Go.

518
00:26:46,353 --> 00:26:48,321
Don't you wish
we were in cell-phone range?

519
00:26:48,489 --> 00:26:51,117
Then we could just call
AAA like we always do.

520
00:26:51,292 --> 00:26:54,784
- Yeah, I don't know how we got so lost.
- I don't either.

521
00:26:54,962 --> 00:26:57,021
Ben, maybe we wouldn't
have gotten lost...

522
00:26:57,197 --> 00:27:01,361
...if you had just followed the TripTik
that I prepared three days in advance.

523
00:27:01,535 --> 00:27:04,834
Well, I thought that I was following
the road signs pretty well.

524
00:27:05,005 --> 00:27:08,099
Just going with the flow, as usual.

525
00:27:09,677 --> 00:27:11,542
What was that?
What was that last thing?

526
00:27:11,712 --> 00:27:14,875
I'm just going along for the ride.

527
00:27:15,049 --> 00:27:17,745
Who was? You. As me.

528
00:27:19,353 --> 00:27:21,685
Well, I'm not really sure
how anything gets done...

529
00:27:21,855 --> 00:27:26,918
...if people aren't following my
very specific instructions, Ben.

530
00:27:27,227 --> 00:27:29,718
But I love it when you're in charge.

531
00:27:29,897 --> 00:27:33,298
That way I don't have to
take too much responsibility, Sadie.

532
00:27:33,467 --> 00:27:37,335
Ben, don't you know that that's the only
way things get done around here?

533
00:27:37,971 --> 00:27:40,030
That's how things get done around here?
Good.

534
00:27:40,207 --> 00:27:41,606
I had no idea.

535
00:27:41,775 --> 00:27:43,709
- Thank you.
- Want me to show you?

536
00:27:43,877 --> 00:27:47,108
- He said counter...
- I think I have it under control!

537
00:27:51,151 --> 00:27:52,743
Dear Jesus!

538
00:27:52,920 --> 00:27:55,354
- Potato skins down!
- Jim, Jim...

539
00:27:57,591 --> 00:27:59,923
Come on, everybody!

540
00:28:00,127 --> 00:28:02,721
Five-second rule!

541
00:28:03,497 --> 00:28:04,828
Janine!

542
00:28:06,367 --> 00:28:08,164
Okay.
We'll pick up next week...

543
00:28:08,335 --> 00:28:10,667
...with balancing
the joint checking account.

544
00:28:17,478 --> 00:28:20,447
So are you writing your vows later or...?

545
00:28:20,614 --> 00:28:23,139
No, I finished earlier.

546
00:28:23,917 --> 00:28:26,545
Hey, what color white should we
go with for the napkins?

547
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:28,119
There's ivory...

548
00:28:28,288 --> 00:28:29,653
...and timid.

549
00:28:30,691 --> 00:28:31,988
Ivory.

550
00:28:32,159 --> 00:28:37,119
I don't know, I kind of feel like it might
clash with the pistachio in the centerpieces.

551
00:28:37,297 --> 00:28:42,132
All right, well, you know what?
I'll just ask Carlisle tomorrow.

552
00:28:42,770 --> 00:28:45,705
<i>Yeah, you know who else you could ask?
Reverend Frank.</i>

553
00:28:45,873 --> 00:28:47,568
<i>Because he loves giving his opinion.</i>

554
00:28:47,741 --> 00:28:49,208
<i>Why do you say it like that?</i>

555
00:28:49,376 --> 00:28:51,003
<i>I don't know. Maybe because...</i>

556
00:28:51,178 --> 00:28:53,646
...he's just a little bit...
- Knowledgeable.

557
00:28:53,814 --> 00:28:56,749
- Yeah.
- "Intrusive." I was gonna go with intrusive.

558
00:28:58,352 --> 00:29:00,684
Ben, he's not intrusive, you know?
He's just...

559
00:29:00,854 --> 00:29:03,721
...observing our relationship right now.

560
00:29:04,057 --> 00:29:08,187
- Like a voyeur.
- Reverend Frank is not like a voyeur.

561
00:29:08,395 --> 00:29:10,863
<i>- A little bit.
- No, he's not.</i>

562
00:29:13,333 --> 00:29:15,858
What was that? What are you doing?

563
00:29:16,036 --> 00:29:17,731
Do you want to walk the midget?

564
00:29:17,905 --> 00:29:19,031
Course I do, but...

565
00:29:19,206 --> 00:29:23,108
<i>... I don't think we should, because it's
against the rules until after the wedding.</i>

566
00:29:24,044 --> 00:29:25,875
- Are you serious?
- Yes.

567
00:29:26,246 --> 00:29:28,806
- You're actually following that rule?
- Yeah.

568
00:29:28,982 --> 00:29:32,383
Because I want to pass the course.
Don't you?

569
00:29:33,153 --> 00:29:35,713
- Yes, I want to pass the course.
- So?

570
00:29:35,889 --> 00:29:40,121
So, I also want to play Pickle Me, Tickle Me
with my really hot fiancée.

571
00:29:41,562 --> 00:29:43,052
Okay?

572
00:29:43,230 --> 00:29:45,960
- Come on.
- What?

573
00:29:46,133 --> 00:29:47,430
No one else is gonna know.

574
00:29:47,601 --> 00:29:50,968
I'll know, Ben. I will know.
So just...

575
00:29:51,138 --> 00:29:52,696
Just please...

576
00:29:52,873 --> 00:29:56,639
...let's stick to the program for now.
Okay? Thank you.

577
00:29:58,078 --> 00:30:00,308
Three weeks never killed anyone.

578
00:30:00,481 --> 00:30:02,346
Really?
Has that ever been documented?

579
00:30:02,516 --> 00:30:04,006
Good night.

580
00:30:08,755 --> 00:30:10,586
Good night, Ben.

581
00:30:18,966 --> 00:30:21,764
Okay, I'm a cigar vendor...

582
00:30:23,437 --> 00:30:25,268
- What?
- Go to bed.

583
00:30:25,439 --> 00:30:27,100
Thank you.

584
00:30:30,377 --> 00:30:32,140
What if I'm not tired?

585
00:30:32,813 --> 00:30:34,474
Yes!

586
00:30:34,648 --> 00:30:35,740
All clear.

587
00:30:35,916 --> 00:30:38,680
- What'd I miss?
- None of your business.

588
00:30:38,852 --> 00:30:42,253
- But they're right on schedule.
- Their optimism is touching.

589
00:30:42,422 --> 00:30:44,982
They remind me of the Anderson couple
we had last month.

590
00:30:45,158 --> 00:30:47,217
Yeah. You know what time it is?

591
00:30:47,661 --> 00:30:49,026
Time to turn up the heat.

592
00:30:49,196 --> 00:30:51,596
It's time to build on the foundation
we've set up.

593
00:30:52,799 --> 00:30:54,699
Remind me never to cross you.

594
00:31:04,444 --> 00:31:06,571
I mean, I'm really glad
we're doing the course.

595
00:31:06,747 --> 00:31:09,272
I just wish Ben would take it
more seriously, you know?

596
00:31:09,449 --> 00:31:11,417
What about these
in my bouquet, Lindsey?

597
00:31:11,585 --> 00:31:12,813
No.

598
00:31:12,986 --> 00:31:14,283
No?

599
00:31:14,454 --> 00:31:19,084
I just want to feel some enthusiasm
from him, or is that expecting too much?

600
00:31:19,259 --> 00:31:22,092
Sadie, you have so much
to learn about men.

601
00:31:22,563 --> 00:31:24,258
Pink.

602
00:31:25,465 --> 00:31:28,161
Flowers by Sadie, Sadie speaking.

603
00:31:29,002 --> 00:31:30,526
Meet where?

604
00:31:30,704 --> 00:31:32,638
I didn't even want to take this course...

605
00:31:32,806 --> 00:31:35,331
...and now she's following it
to, like, the nth degree.

606
00:31:35,509 --> 00:31:38,376
Where are the cheerleaders?
Shouldn't they be practicing too?

607
00:31:38,545 --> 00:31:41,844
Come on, Famaletti! Deny that baseline!

608
00:31:42,015 --> 00:31:44,643
Coach Murphy, you were right
to put him on B-squad.

609
00:31:44,818 --> 00:31:47,548
- Get ready, Zach.
- Or maybe I'm just overreacting.

610
00:31:47,721 --> 00:31:50,781
I mean, give and take, that's a part of
every healthy relationship.

611
00:31:51,124 --> 00:31:52,250
Give and what?

612
00:31:52,426 --> 00:31:54,087
- Give and take.
- Man, listen to me.

613
00:31:54,561 --> 00:31:58,122
Once a woman senses she has control,
she'll tell a thousand of her friends.

614
00:31:58,298 --> 00:32:02,291
Then they'll want control too.
"I want a little piece of this control stuff."

615
00:32:02,469 --> 00:32:06,599
Next thing you know, they'll be running
companies and having their own offices.

616
00:32:06,773 --> 00:32:10,539
Do not set dangerous precedents
for other men.

617
00:32:13,113 --> 00:32:14,774
Hello?

618
00:32:15,449 --> 00:32:16,438
Late for what?

619
00:32:16,617 --> 00:32:20,849
Welcome to Saint Catherine's Maternity,
birthplace to over 4000 babies each year.

620
00:32:21,021 --> 00:32:24,115
That's almost 80 babies a week,
and we've never misplaced one.

621
00:32:24,291 --> 00:32:25,280
Okay, maybe one.

622
00:32:26,026 --> 00:32:28,995
If you're shy, get your tubes tied now
and call it a day.

623
00:32:29,162 --> 00:32:31,756
A woman in labor basically
lies around almost naked...

624
00:32:31,932 --> 00:32:35,493
...while dozens of doctors and nurses
get a front row view of her wide open...

625
00:32:35,669 --> 00:32:38,001
Virginia! Put some gloves
on those hands right now!

626
00:32:38,171 --> 00:32:39,729
We're not delivering pizzas here.

627
00:32:39,906 --> 00:32:43,467
Labor could last anywhere from
a few hours to a few days.

628
00:32:44,177 --> 00:32:48,580
And that's not even counting the nine
months of constipation leading up to it.

629
00:32:48,749 --> 00:32:50,444
Of course, there's always drugs...

630
00:32:50,617 --> 00:32:53,586
...so you should figure out how
you feel about that beforehand.

631
00:32:54,054 --> 00:32:55,419
l... Oh, God!

632
00:32:55,589 --> 00:32:58,217
And then be ready to toss
that decision out the window...

633
00:32:58,392 --> 00:33:01,327
...when the pain really kicks in.

634
00:33:02,229 --> 00:33:04,561
A woman in labor
wouldn't even feel that.

635
00:33:04,731 --> 00:33:06,289
Good to know.

636
00:33:06,466 --> 00:33:07,455
Or that.

637
00:33:07,634 --> 00:33:08,896
This way.

638
00:33:09,069 --> 00:33:11,003
You squeamish, Ben?

639
00:33:11,505 --> 00:33:12,938
Little bit, I guess.

640
00:33:13,106 --> 00:33:16,007
You have to figure out if you're
gonna be in the delivery room.

641
00:33:16,176 --> 00:33:17,700
Oh, yeah, of course he will be.

642
00:33:17,878 --> 00:33:18,867
Yes.

643
00:33:19,046 --> 00:33:21,310
Some men are so traumatized
by the experience...

644
00:33:21,481 --> 00:33:24,450
...they can never look at their wives
the same again.

645
00:33:24,618 --> 00:33:26,142
Sexually, that is.

646
00:33:26,319 --> 00:33:28,981
Give me some slow, deep breaths.

647
00:33:29,156 --> 00:33:30,783
How many do you want to have?

648
00:33:30,957 --> 00:33:32,288
- Four?
- Two?

649
00:33:33,427 --> 00:33:35,861
Big push. Big push.

650
00:33:36,029 --> 00:33:38,190
I need an epidural!

651
00:33:38,532 --> 00:33:41,797
Look at her! She's breathing fine!

652
00:33:42,102 --> 00:33:43,296
What about me?

653
00:33:45,439 --> 00:33:47,964
They say for a man to experience
the equivalent pain...

654
00:33:48,141 --> 00:33:50,302
...you'd have to pull your scrotum
over your head.

655
00:33:51,478 --> 00:33:52,775
That was incredible.

656
00:33:52,946 --> 00:33:54,243
Glad you feel that way.

657
00:33:54,414 --> 00:33:56,905
Because now the real fun begins.

658
00:33:57,317 --> 00:33:59,046
Welcome to the world of parenting.

659
00:33:59,219 --> 00:34:02,382
- They breathe, they blink, they cry.
- And they're all yours.

660
00:34:02,856 --> 00:34:06,292
Congratulations, you've just had twins.

661
00:34:09,863 --> 00:34:12,161
Look at how their little chests
move up and down.

662
00:34:12,332 --> 00:34:15,699
Yeah. Their creepy little chests.

663
00:34:15,869 --> 00:34:18,667
And you really want four of these things?

664
00:34:19,206 --> 00:34:22,004
I think it'd be nice to have
a big family, don't you?

665
00:34:22,175 --> 00:34:24,439
Yeah. No, no, definitely.

666
00:34:24,611 --> 00:34:25,635
Well, I mean...

667
00:34:25,812 --> 00:34:28,474
...four might be kind of
a big commitment.

668
00:34:33,587 --> 00:34:36,420
Okay, do you want to take that?

669
00:34:36,790 --> 00:34:40,590
No, you can do it. Come on.

670
00:34:43,630 --> 00:34:45,495
Just pat him on the back really gently.

671
00:34:45,665 --> 00:34:46,927
Okay.

672
00:34:47,100 --> 00:34:48,658
Poor little baby.

673
00:34:48,835 --> 00:34:52,032
Little creepy robot baby.

674
00:34:54,508 --> 00:34:56,100
Oh, my God!

675
00:34:58,378 --> 00:35:00,505
- God.
- Hold on.

676
00:35:01,348 --> 00:35:02,679
- Here you go.
- Stop, stop.

677
00:35:02,849 --> 00:35:04,714
Hold on, hold on. There you go.

678
00:35:04,885 --> 00:35:07,080
- There's some on his shirt too.
- Okay.

679
00:35:07,254 --> 00:35:09,415
We can't forget to set the alarm for 8...

680
00:35:09,589 --> 00:35:12,422
...because we're going to Macy's
to register for the wedding.

681
00:35:12,592 --> 00:35:14,924
Wait, we're not bringing these
with us, are we?

682
00:35:15,095 --> 00:35:17,962
Come on, can't we just, like,
phone in our order or something?

683
00:35:18,131 --> 00:35:22,465
No, we're so jammed this week,
tomorrow's the only day we can do it.

684
00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:29,070
Look at that. Fell back asleep.

685
00:35:29,876 --> 00:35:31,173
So I did it.

686
00:35:31,344 --> 00:35:34,006
Looks like this parenting thing
isn't as hard as they say.

687
00:35:34,181 --> 00:35:35,978
See? You're a natural.

688
00:35:36,149 --> 00:35:37,138
Thanks.

689
00:35:37,317 --> 00:35:38,306
Night.

690
00:35:43,056 --> 00:35:46,025
Ben? Ben!

691
00:35:46,193 --> 00:35:47,956
Ben!

692
00:35:48,328 --> 00:35:49,488
Ben!

693
00:35:49,663 --> 00:35:51,722
Okay, I'm coming.

694
00:35:51,898 --> 00:35:53,661
What? Hi.

695
00:35:53,834 --> 00:35:56,598
How many times do I have to knock, man?
How you doing?

696
00:35:56,803 --> 00:35:58,065
- Good.
- Good morning.

697
00:35:58,238 --> 00:36:00,035
- Shelly's dad fell off a ladder.
- What?

698
00:36:00,207 --> 00:36:02,869
And unfortunately, he's gonna make it.
So we have to go...

699
00:36:03,043 --> 00:36:05,307
...and you are on brat patrol
for a couple hours.

700
00:36:05,478 --> 00:36:07,446
Thank you. Appreciate it.
Thanks a million.

701
00:36:14,221 --> 00:36:16,246
Hi.

702
00:36:16,857 --> 00:36:18,916
Which one's the biter?

703
00:36:19,092 --> 00:36:22,960
All you have to do is point the gun at
the item you want and then pull the trigger.

704
00:36:23,129 --> 00:36:26,997
The computer instantly logs it in our registry
database for your guests to consider.

705
00:36:27,167 --> 00:36:29,499
There's no limit to how many
items I can choose?

706
00:36:29,669 --> 00:36:31,694
- When in doubt, zap it.
- Great.

707
00:36:31,872 --> 00:36:33,499
We only have a couple hours so...

708
00:36:33,673 --> 00:36:36,039
Chop-chop. Come on.

709
00:36:36,776 --> 00:36:39,768
Okay. All right. Yep.

710
00:36:39,946 --> 00:36:41,777
Guys, guys, guys,
slow down, slow down.

711
00:36:41,948 --> 00:36:43,848
Hey. All right, that's good.

712
00:36:44,017 --> 00:36:47,544
Now we're going faster.
Stop, stop. Hello?

713
00:36:47,721 --> 00:36:48,983
All right, guys. All right.

714
00:36:49,155 --> 00:36:52,682
The yelling needs to hold off. All right.

715
00:36:53,393 --> 00:36:56,021
Hey, Ben, what do you like better?
The blue or the beige?

716
00:36:56,196 --> 00:36:57,788
The beige or the blue?

717
00:36:57,964 --> 00:37:00,398
- I like the blue. Blue's good.
- Beige goes better...

718
00:37:00,567 --> 00:37:01,795
...with the placemats.

719
00:37:02,235 --> 00:37:03,998
Or beige. Let's just do beige.

720
00:37:04,170 --> 00:37:05,637
I love beige.

721
00:37:06,239 --> 00:37:07,866
Beige it is.

722
00:37:17,183 --> 00:37:18,946
- Do you like this one?
- It's great.

723
00:37:19,119 --> 00:37:22,145
- All right, let's get this one.
- Yeah, let's get a couple.

724
00:37:24,791 --> 00:37:26,986
Oh, I just got this text message
from Carlisle.

725
00:37:27,160 --> 00:37:28,684
I got the wrong dinnerware.

726
00:37:28,862 --> 00:37:31,695
- Do you mean silverware? Can we just go?
- No, dinnerware.

727
00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:36,764
- No way. That is not simulated.
- God, that's bad.

728
00:37:38,772 --> 00:37:40,706
Well, why don't you change the diaper...

729
00:37:40,874 --> 00:37:42,466
...and I'll go get the dinnerware?

730
00:37:42,642 --> 00:37:45,270
- Why don't we think about...
- Okay.

731
00:37:49,649 --> 00:37:50,673
Okay.

732
00:38:25,151 --> 00:38:26,709
Yeah.

733
00:38:29,689 --> 00:38:31,782
Stop! Oh, God!

734
00:38:31,958 --> 00:38:34,119
Stop, stop!

735
00:38:35,295 --> 00:38:38,526
Should we get the 500-thread count?
Ben, can you slow down a little bit?

736
00:38:38,698 --> 00:38:40,791
Oh, I'm trying.

737
00:38:45,972 --> 00:38:47,371
Oh, my God.

738
00:38:47,540 --> 00:38:48,564
Sorry. Ben?

739
00:38:48,742 --> 00:38:50,676
- Give me one, please?
- Will you take that?

740
00:38:50,844 --> 00:38:52,311
I'm gonna give you one.

741
00:38:52,479 --> 00:38:55,846
- I will help you by getting this one thing...
- I'm sorry.

742
00:38:56,016 --> 00:38:57,711
Guys, guys, guys, it's okay.

743
00:38:59,552 --> 00:39:01,179
- Come here. Come on, come on.
- Okay.

744
00:39:01,354 --> 00:39:03,652
Ben, don't drop him!

745
00:39:03,823 --> 00:39:05,654
Here, take the kids. Come on, come on.

746
00:39:05,825 --> 00:39:07,315
Boys, let's go. Come on.

747
00:39:07,494 --> 00:39:10,725
Hi, I'm looking for some Pima cotton
or Egyptian cotton sheets.

748
00:39:10,897 --> 00:39:13,297
Something that really seems to breathe.
I'm sorry.

749
00:39:13,466 --> 00:39:16,697
I can't seem to find them over there
and I have...

750
00:39:16,870 --> 00:39:19,430
Get off the bed.
All right.

751
00:39:21,408 --> 00:39:22,875
Get off the bed.

752
00:39:23,043 --> 00:39:26,604
Enough. Okay, enough.
No, no. Okay. Stop!

753
00:39:26,780 --> 00:39:29,476
No, no, no.
Guys, no, no, no.

754
00:39:29,649 --> 00:39:33,346
Just stop. Sorry.
It's fine. It's just a...

755
00:39:33,520 --> 00:39:34,851
Stop.

756
00:39:36,990 --> 00:39:40,016
Stop it! Stop, you stupid... Shut up!

757
00:39:40,193 --> 00:39:45,460
Just shut up, shut up, shut up!
Shut up, shut up! Shut it! Shut it!

758
00:39:45,632 --> 00:39:48,226
- Hey! What the hell are you doing?!
- I'm sorry.

759
00:39:48,601 --> 00:39:50,660
Thank God. I've had a long day.

760
00:39:50,837 --> 00:39:53,305
These are fake. Watch. See?

761
00:39:55,275 --> 00:39:56,765
No, no, no, we're on our way.

762
00:39:56,943 --> 00:40:01,141
We just got a little detained at Macy's.
Well, Ben did.

763
00:40:01,314 --> 00:40:03,544
For being a public nuisance.

764
00:40:03,716 --> 00:40:05,707
It's a long story.

765
00:40:05,885 --> 00:40:09,116
Okay. Bye.

766
00:40:10,156 --> 00:40:11,453
Well, I'll tell you...

767
00:40:11,624 --> 00:40:14,616
...l'm a lot more prepared for kids now.

768
00:40:15,095 --> 00:40:16,153
Like way more.

769
00:40:16,329 --> 00:40:19,958
Why are there 56 bras on here?

770
00:40:39,419 --> 00:40:41,819
Pour a glass of that for yourself.
Have a glass.

771
00:40:41,988 --> 00:40:45,651
All right, I got it. This is it.
You, my dear, look amazing.

772
00:40:47,527 --> 00:40:49,358
I can't believe all these cheeses.

773
00:40:49,529 --> 00:40:52,020
I know.
I don't even know which to start with.

774
00:40:52,198 --> 00:40:54,826
- There are so many.
- It's funny. Cheez Whiz or Velveeta.

775
00:40:55,001 --> 00:40:57,970
That's about as complicated
as my cheese dilemmas usually get.

776
00:40:58,138 --> 00:41:01,369
I think I prefer the nutty
Comté Saint-Antoine, which is this one.

777
00:41:01,541 --> 00:41:03,805
- All right, this is it?
- From the Basque region...

778
00:41:03,977 --> 00:41:06,878
...and go.
Gonna change your life.

779
00:41:07,046 --> 00:41:10,948
- Oh, my God. Carlisle.
- Oh, my God. Carlisle. Wait a minute.

780
00:41:11,117 --> 00:41:14,609
Ben, Carlisle's totally right.
I mean, this nutty cheese is the way to go.

781
00:41:14,787 --> 00:41:16,652
It's so good. You have to try it.

782
00:41:16,823 --> 00:41:20,657
- The white one? Good.
- You were right. You recommended it too.

783
00:41:21,861 --> 00:41:23,954
- Hey, everybody.
- Hey!

784
00:41:24,697 --> 00:41:27,495
Every time I hear the word
"cheese us," I'm in.

785
00:41:27,667 --> 00:41:29,157
Praise Gouda.

786
00:41:31,004 --> 00:41:33,404
Look at all of you,
you're all dressed to the nines.

787
00:41:33,573 --> 00:41:35,598
Oh, Lindsey, you look fabulous.

788
00:41:35,775 --> 00:41:38,573
- Oh, thank you.
- How's life after the big D?

789
00:41:40,146 --> 00:41:41,374
That bad, huh?

790
00:41:41,648 --> 00:41:43,946
Men are a little too hard to train so...

791
00:41:44,117 --> 00:41:48,554
Thought I'd stop trying
and live vicariously through Ben's training.

792
00:41:50,523 --> 00:41:52,616
Here I was thinking I was
already housebroken.

793
00:41:52,792 --> 00:41:53,781
Maybe not.

794
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:55,188
- Cute.
- It's refreshing...

795
00:41:55,361 --> 00:41:57,386
...how honest you are.
It doesn't happen...

796
00:41:57,564 --> 00:41:59,759
...that easily for a lot of in-laws.
- Really?

797
00:41:59,933 --> 00:42:03,027
Because I feel like we all
get along really well.

798
00:42:03,203 --> 00:42:05,865
You know what, Ben is a wonderful
addition to this family.

799
00:42:06,039 --> 00:42:07,506
Wow, thank you.

800
00:42:07,674 --> 00:42:09,539
Whatever.
There's a little awkwardness...

801
00:42:09,709 --> 00:42:11,836
...but nothing more
than just new family stuff.

802
00:42:12,011 --> 00:42:14,639
You know a great way around
new family awkwardness?

803
00:42:14,814 --> 00:42:17,112
- Word association.
- Excuse me?

804
00:42:17,283 --> 00:42:19,410
It's fun, really. You go around the table...

805
00:42:19,586 --> 00:42:22,555
...and you pick one word that best
describes each in-law...

806
00:42:22,722 --> 00:42:24,815
...then they pick one word
that describes you.

807
00:42:24,991 --> 00:42:30,088
- A give and take, kind of an icebreaker...
- I think it sounds so fun. I love games.

808
00:42:30,263 --> 00:42:31,753
That's the spirit, Grandma.

809
00:42:31,931 --> 00:42:33,762
Ben, start with Grandma.

810
00:42:33,933 --> 00:42:37,562
One word to describe Grandma.

811
00:42:38,371 --> 00:42:41,602
That word would be...

812
00:42:41,774 --> 00:42:43,332
...wisdom.

813
00:42:43,509 --> 00:42:44,669
Excellent.

814
00:42:44,844 --> 00:42:46,709
Grandma. What about Ben?

815
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:49,477
Peculiar for his age.

816
00:42:49,649 --> 00:42:52,140
Let's just try and stick with one word.

817
00:42:52,385 --> 00:42:55,479
- I'd just say peculiar.
- Okay.

818
00:42:55,655 --> 00:42:57,987
We have a winner.
Game over. I think.

819
00:42:58,157 --> 00:43:01,217
- No, no, come on. What about Lindsey?
- I don't wanna do it.

820
00:43:01,394 --> 00:43:03,954
Don't think.
What's the first word comes to your mind?

821
00:43:04,130 --> 00:43:05,791
Go for it.

822
00:43:07,033 --> 00:43:08,466
Blond.

823
00:43:08,635 --> 00:43:10,034
- Are you kidding me?
- Golden.

824
00:43:10,203 --> 00:43:13,798
No, gold. No, like you exude gold.
Not dumb, though.

825
00:43:13,973 --> 00:43:16,669
- I didn't say dumb.
- You didn't say dumb. You said blond.

826
00:43:16,843 --> 00:43:18,572
Okay. Blond Lindsey.

827
00:43:18,745 --> 00:43:21,680
Oh, my tur... Okay, awesome!
Yes, okay, so...

828
00:43:23,349 --> 00:43:25,078
Assertive.

829
00:43:25,551 --> 00:43:29,453
If you need someone to take the bull
by the horns, Ben's your guy.

830
00:43:30,723 --> 00:43:32,247
That's a good one.
Not that good.

831
00:43:32,425 --> 00:43:35,485
I mean, she's laughing a little
too hard for it, but good joke.

832
00:43:37,096 --> 00:43:39,360
This is terrific.
See how you're breaking the ice?

833
00:43:39,532 --> 00:43:42,092
There's something new happening now.
Take a shot at Dad.

834
00:43:42,268 --> 00:43:44,133
- There we go.
- Sadie's dad is...

835
00:43:44,304 --> 00:43:45,362
He's outgoing.

836
00:43:45,538 --> 00:43:48,666
- Outgoing, like saying "nice."
- That's very fitting.

837
00:43:48,841 --> 00:43:50,536
You're not shedding any light.

838
00:43:50,710 --> 00:43:52,837
- Come on, you can do better than this.
- Yes.

839
00:43:53,012 --> 00:43:54,445
- Let it rip.
- No, no, no.

840
00:43:54,614 --> 00:43:57,242
- No, don't push me. I'm not gonna...
- He's asking, Ben.

841
00:43:57,417 --> 00:43:58,782
- Go, come on.
- All right.

842
00:44:00,486 --> 00:44:01,748
What about pompous?

843
00:44:01,921 --> 00:44:06,187
<i>- I'm a little pompous.
- What's the Wizard of Oz thing? Pompous.</i>

844
00:44:06,793 --> 00:44:08,090
No, I was just kidding.

845
00:44:08,261 --> 00:44:12,459
No. No, no, no.
It's all right. I asked for it.

846
00:44:12,632 --> 00:44:16,466
I just meant somebody likes
to hear the sound of their own voice.

847
00:44:16,836 --> 00:44:18,326
Now you're getting interesting.

848
00:44:18,504 --> 00:44:20,096
Pompous dad, back at Ben.

849
00:44:20,273 --> 00:44:22,241
- Here it is.
- Okay.

850
00:44:22,875 --> 00:44:25,241
- How about vanilla?
- Whoa, mom!

851
00:44:25,411 --> 00:44:26,901
Called you vanilla.

852
00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:29,344
Could be bland, I'm not sure,
but it's your call.

853
00:44:29,515 --> 00:44:33,884
- Back at mom. Come on, Ben.
- Okay, "Stepford-y." Stepfordy.

854
00:44:34,053 --> 00:44:36,851
Stepfordy? Is that an adjective?

855
00:44:37,023 --> 00:44:38,718
Yeah, it just describes, you know:

856
00:44:38,891 --> 00:44:42,452
"Let's just sweep everything under the rug
with a pat on the back, a smile...

857
00:44:42,628 --> 00:44:45,620
...and don't forget the glass of champagne
to take the edge off."

858
00:44:45,798 --> 00:44:47,197
You're on a roll. Come on.

859
00:44:47,367 --> 00:44:50,063
Do we have any problems here?
If we did, we'd just...

860
00:44:50,236 --> 00:44:55,230
...throw some money at it because we
all know there's nothing money can't buy.

861
00:44:58,945 --> 00:45:01,106
Can't buy communication like this.

862
00:45:02,682 --> 00:45:06,118
<i>Hey, Ben, I thought you were
really great with my family today.</i>

863
00:45:06,285 --> 00:45:07,582
Are you making fun of me?

864
00:45:07,754 --> 00:45:09,847
No. No. Course not.

865
00:45:10,022 --> 00:45:11,182
It sounded like you were.

866
00:45:11,357 --> 00:45:13,484
I'm not making fun of you.
The fact that you...

867
00:45:13,659 --> 00:45:16,651
...lost your mind and embarrassed yourself
in front of everyone.

868
00:45:16,829 --> 00:45:19,730
No, that's not making fun of anyone.

869
00:45:22,568 --> 00:45:25,128
- Okay.
- What?

870
00:45:25,405 --> 00:45:27,873
- Time for a punishment. Come here.
- No.

871
00:45:31,444 --> 00:45:32,433
<i>What are you doing?</i>

872
00:45:32,612 --> 00:45:36,104
<i>- What does it look like I'm doing?
- Something that's very against the rules.</i>

873
00:45:36,282 --> 00:45:37,806
Mayday.

874
00:45:43,823 --> 00:45:45,814
Hi. Just in the neighborhood...

875
00:45:45,992 --> 00:45:48,358
...thought I'd drop by,
make a little house call.

876
00:45:48,528 --> 00:45:49,961
Yeah, of course you were.

877
00:45:50,129 --> 00:45:52,757
- Am I interrupting anything?
- No, no, no. Come on in.

878
00:45:52,932 --> 00:45:55,423
- Oh, thanks. Yay.
- Come on in.

879
00:45:55,601 --> 00:45:58,968
- Hi.
- I won't overstay my welcome.

880
00:45:59,505 --> 00:46:02,099
I just wanted to check
and see if everything was okay...

881
00:46:02,275 --> 00:46:06,041
...because after the tasting,
things were a little tense with the in-laws.

882
00:46:06,212 --> 00:46:08,043
Nope. No tension here.

883
00:46:08,881 --> 00:46:10,348
Can I be frank?

884
00:46:10,516 --> 00:46:12,040
Of course, I'm Frank.

885
00:46:12,218 --> 00:46:14,015
Pardon the pun...

886
00:46:14,187 --> 00:46:17,384
...but at this stage in the course,
I usually find out that...

887
00:46:17,557 --> 00:46:20,720
...a lot of couples resort to sex
as a quick fix for their problems.

888
00:46:20,893 --> 00:46:24,090
I just wanna make sure you're
strong enough to resist the temptation.

889
00:46:24,263 --> 00:46:27,027
- Yeah. We are.
- Yeah.

890
00:46:27,200 --> 00:46:29,532
Does that make you uncomfortable, Ben?

891
00:46:29,902 --> 00:46:33,030
No, I'm not uncomfortable
talking about sex, no.

892
00:46:33,206 --> 00:46:35,504
Having you in my living room
talking about sex...

893
00:46:35,675 --> 00:46:38,769
...that makes me a little uncomfortable.
Yeah.

894
00:46:38,945 --> 00:46:41,106
The number one rule of a good sex life...

895
00:46:41,280 --> 00:46:43,009
...is not being so serious.

896
00:46:43,182 --> 00:46:44,444
You know, because...

897
00:46:44,617 --> 00:46:46,812
...if the humor goes,
there goes the intimacy...

898
00:46:46,986 --> 00:46:49,853
...and then there goes the marriage,
then divorce, yada, yada.

899
00:46:50,256 --> 00:46:52,224
But there is a remedy.

900
00:46:52,391 --> 00:46:55,258
Knowing what your partner likes sexually.
How do you find out?

901
00:46:55,428 --> 00:46:58,226
Well, you ask. That's kind of wonderful.

902
00:46:58,397 --> 00:47:01,230
Hey, one little exercise,
then I'm Audi 5000, okay?

903
00:47:01,801 --> 00:47:02,825
Ben.

904
00:47:03,002 --> 00:47:05,334
Look at Sadie
and complete this sentence:

905
00:47:05,505 --> 00:47:07,632
"I like it when..."

906
00:47:11,777 --> 00:47:15,338
- This is ridiculous. I'm not doing it.
- It's not, Ben. Come on, I wanna know.

907
00:47:15,515 --> 00:47:17,779
I don't wanna talk about it.
I don't wanna do it.

908
00:47:17,950 --> 00:47:19,417
I wanna know.

909
00:47:20,052 --> 00:47:21,781
Please.

910
00:47:23,623 --> 00:47:25,488
Sadie.

911
00:47:26,492 --> 00:47:30,019
I really like it when...

912
00:47:30,596 --> 00:47:32,860
...Reverend Frank doesn't
interrupt us before sex.

913
00:47:33,032 --> 00:47:34,761
I'm glad I got that off my chest.

914
00:47:34,934 --> 00:47:36,492
- Okay.
- That's okay.

915
00:47:36,669 --> 00:47:39,536
You're not comfortable with this,
let's show him how to do it.

916
00:47:39,705 --> 00:47:42,833
- Don't hold back.
- I like it when it's out of the ordinary...

917
00:47:43,009 --> 00:47:44,408
...personally.

918
00:47:44,577 --> 00:47:48,274
That's weird, because I always pictured you
as a kind of in-the-bedroom person.

919
00:47:48,447 --> 00:47:52,349
- No, not really. No.
- Hi! Whoa! Out of the ordinary?

920
00:47:52,518 --> 00:47:53,746
We're out of the ordinary.

921
00:47:53,920 --> 00:47:57,549
Because I remember having sex
on this carpet and I got a rug burn.

922
00:47:57,723 --> 00:47:58,951
- Ouch.
- Yeah.

923
00:47:59,125 --> 00:48:00,592
One time, though.
It was great...

924
00:48:00,760 --> 00:48:02,819
...but it's more the exception
than the rule.

925
00:48:02,995 --> 00:48:05,623
- I'm talking about, like, real spontaneity.
- Like what?

926
00:48:05,798 --> 00:48:07,959
Like my parents' bathroom?

927
00:48:08,134 --> 00:48:10,398
Oh, yeah, and everyone's
downstairs having dinner.

928
00:48:10,570 --> 00:48:12,970
- Exactly. Or on the beach.
- Under a towel.

929
00:48:13,139 --> 00:48:15,607
- At work.
- In the office supply room.

930
00:48:15,775 --> 00:48:19,506
Or maybe at your grandmother's house
while she's in the kitchen making tea.

931
00:48:19,679 --> 00:48:21,442
Yes! I love it when you get creative.

932
00:48:21,647 --> 00:48:24,013
You have no idea.
I love it when you take control.

933
00:48:24,183 --> 00:48:25,548
What do you like about that?

934
00:48:25,718 --> 00:48:28,152
Okay! That's enough of that!

935
00:48:28,321 --> 00:48:30,289
Ben, come on. This is just an exercise.

936
00:48:30,456 --> 00:48:32,356
- We were talking through it. Yes!
- No. No.

937
00:48:32,525 --> 00:48:35,153
Sadie.
Pushups, that's an exercise.

938
00:48:35,895 --> 00:48:38,159
No. No, I see
Ben's point of view here.

939
00:48:38,331 --> 00:48:40,060
Maybe we're rushing things a bit.

940
00:48:40,232 --> 00:48:42,700
Maybe I should pencil in
the date two years from now.

941
00:48:42,902 --> 00:48:45,462
- Okay.
- Sorry to bother you. Good night.

942
00:48:45,638 --> 00:48:51,235
I'll let myself out. I know the way.
You have a good night. I'm going out now.

943
00:48:51,410 --> 00:48:54,004
- What was that?
- Please.

944
00:48:54,180 --> 00:48:55,169
Reverend Frank!

945
00:48:56,716 --> 00:48:58,343
So we back on schedule?

946
00:48:58,517 --> 00:49:00,951
He's a reverend.
What did you think was gonna happen?

947
00:49:01,120 --> 00:49:04,021
Well, I can't believe you were
talking to him like that.

948
00:49:04,190 --> 00:49:09,753
I can't believe the first man to actually ask
me what I like in bed was my minister.

949
00:49:27,278 --> 00:49:28,472
Son of a...

950
00:49:48,066 --> 00:49:53,003
Hey, get your butt out the way!
This ain't no damn pedestrian crossing!

951
00:49:53,171 --> 00:49:55,366
So you're telling me
he bugged your apartment?

952
00:49:55,540 --> 00:49:57,508
Yes.
And who knows what he heard?

953
00:49:57,675 --> 00:50:00,542
I mean, this guy is sick,
and I can't wait to tell Sadie.

954
00:50:00,712 --> 00:50:03,078
- She's gonna freak out.
- You cannot tell Sadie.

955
00:50:03,248 --> 00:50:06,342
You think she's gonna believe her
reverend is bugging your bedroom?

956
00:50:06,517 --> 00:50:08,246
Of course she will. I have evidence.

957
00:50:08,419 --> 00:50:10,114
Does this bug have his name on it?

958
00:50:10,288 --> 00:50:12,085
No. But...

959
00:50:12,590 --> 00:50:13,614
All right.

960
00:50:13,791 --> 00:50:16,055
We can talk about this later
if you need to focus.

961
00:50:16,227 --> 00:50:19,094
I'm good. This is about you.
Lady in the wheelchair, please!

962
00:50:19,831 --> 00:50:21,025
Listen.

963
00:50:21,199 --> 00:50:23,531
The lines of communication
have to be shut down...

964
00:50:23,701 --> 00:50:27,137
...between you and your woman.
She trusts the reverend completely now.

965
00:50:27,305 --> 00:50:29,603
She trusts him so much
she's calling Shelly...

966
00:50:29,774 --> 00:50:33,107
...and telling her how we need
to take a course to help our marriage.

967
00:50:33,511 --> 00:50:35,843
So I'm supposed to take this lying down?

968
00:50:36,014 --> 00:50:39,108
No. Look, let me make this simple, okay?

969
00:50:39,317 --> 00:50:42,718
We have to punch a hole in Frank's
holier-than-thou armor.

970
00:50:42,887 --> 00:50:47,688
We have to find his deepest,
darkest secret and take him down.

971
00:50:48,593 --> 00:50:50,220
Roach coach.

972
00:50:51,262 --> 00:50:53,230
Roach coach!

973
00:51:20,858 --> 00:51:22,587
I'm not doing that. I'm not doing it.

974
00:51:22,760 --> 00:51:25,251
Thrust, thrust.

975
00:51:27,231 --> 00:51:30,530
All right, I know you're gonna find
something you like with this group.

976
00:51:30,702 --> 00:51:33,068
See, this is just what I gravitate towards.

977
00:51:33,237 --> 00:51:36,695
- Really simple.
- And no diamond? I'm fine with that.

978
00:51:40,545 --> 00:51:41,739
Split up?

979
00:51:42,947 --> 00:51:44,676
Come apart.

980
00:52:43,941 --> 00:52:44,930
Excuse me.

981
00:52:45,109 --> 00:52:47,669
Hi. I'm just here to pick up my rings.

982
00:52:47,845 --> 00:52:50,609
- Last name's Murphy.
- Murphy.

983
00:52:51,749 --> 00:52:53,774
- Okay, there you go.
- Oh, great. Thank you.

984
00:52:53,951 --> 00:52:55,816
Let's take a look.

985
00:52:55,987 --> 00:52:57,249
Oh, wow.

986
00:52:57,422 --> 00:52:59,413
- They're really beauti...
- Thank you.

987
00:53:00,792 --> 00:53:03,818
I'm sorry, does that say "Never to fart"?

988
00:53:04,028 --> 00:53:06,155
That's what you wrote
on your inscription form.

989
00:53:06,330 --> 00:53:08,264
I'm sorry, I wrote "Never to part."

990
00:53:08,433 --> 00:53:10,298
I don't know who would've
written "fart."

991
00:53:10,468 --> 00:53:13,164
- That's ridiculous.
- We get pretty strange requests here...

992
00:53:13,337 --> 00:53:17,774
...and we just engrave whatever is written,
and there you go.

993
00:53:17,942 --> 00:53:20,706
- Yep. "Never to part."
- "Never to fart."

994
00:53:22,246 --> 00:53:24,237
- No, that's a P.
- It's an F, sir.

995
00:53:24,415 --> 00:53:28,010
Nope, that's a P. Do you see how
that comes around in a P way?

996
00:53:28,419 --> 00:53:29,511
- Judith?
- Yes?

997
00:53:29,687 --> 00:53:32,212
Could you come over here
just for a tiny little second?

998
00:53:32,390 --> 00:53:33,823
Thank you. Judith...

999
00:53:33,991 --> 00:53:36,289
- Sure.
- What is this letter there?

1000
00:53:37,829 --> 00:53:39,854
- That is an F.
- No, that's a P.

1001
00:53:40,031 --> 00:53:41,999
It's a P.
It comes around like a P.

1002
00:53:42,166 --> 00:53:45,067
Well, actually, if you look,
there's clearly a gap in the curl.

1003
00:53:45,236 --> 00:53:47,568
There's no gap in the curl.
Judith? It connects.

1004
00:53:47,738 --> 00:53:49,137
That's a P. "Never to part."

1005
00:53:49,307 --> 00:53:52,174
- Mark, could you just come...
- I don't know that we need Mark.

1006
00:53:52,343 --> 00:53:54,208
...a little quick second here?

1007
00:53:54,378 --> 00:53:57,040
- And what is that?
- Oh, the novelty inscription, yes.

1008
00:53:57,215 --> 00:54:00,582
Mark, it's not a novelty inscription.
It's a romantic inscription.

1009
00:54:00,751 --> 00:54:02,548
Excuse me.
What is this letter?

1010
00:54:02,720 --> 00:54:07,555
- It's an F. I do teach penmanship.
- I took his class. It's wonderful.

1011
00:54:08,059 --> 00:54:09,720
- It's pretty clearly an F.
- Yeah.

1012
00:54:09,894 --> 00:54:10,883
Excuse me, excuse me.

1013
00:54:11,062 --> 00:54:13,223
Hi. I'm really sorry
to bother you. Very nice.

1014
00:54:13,397 --> 00:54:18,096
Could I ask you to help us out with
a problem here, just a little problem?

1015
00:54:18,269 --> 00:54:20,328
Could we show the normal person?
Thank you.

1016
00:54:20,505 --> 00:54:25,807
What would you call the letter between
the fingers that I'm pointing at right there?

1017
00:54:26,077 --> 00:54:27,669
- What is that?
- An F?

1018
00:54:27,845 --> 00:54:30,279
- I'm sorry, sir? Louder, please?
- An F?

1019
00:54:30,448 --> 00:54:31,437
- F.
- Yes.

1020
00:54:31,616 --> 00:54:34,779
- That's right.
- Okay, excuse me. Hi. All right.

1021
00:54:34,952 --> 00:54:36,920
I'm getting married in two days.

1022
00:54:37,088 --> 00:54:39,886
Thank you.
I really need that to say "Never to part."

1023
00:54:40,057 --> 00:54:42,719
- That's very nice.
- "Never to part." That's so sweet.

1024
00:54:42,894 --> 00:54:44,054
And that's what I wrote.

1025
00:54:44,228 --> 00:54:47,356
I need it to say "Never to part,"
and I need it done immediately.

1026
00:54:47,532 --> 00:54:50,365
So how do we do that?
How do we get that done?

1027
00:54:50,535 --> 00:54:52,526
We could have it tomorrow.
In the morning.

1028
00:54:52,703 --> 00:54:54,603
Great.
And that's what we can do.

1029
00:54:54,772 --> 00:54:56,364
But there's a $250 rush fee.

1030
00:54:56,541 --> 00:54:59,942
So I'm spending $250 on something
I asked you to do in the first place?

1031
00:55:00,111 --> 00:55:01,669
And we can guarantee that.

1032
00:55:04,282 --> 00:55:06,580
This is ridiculous. There's nothing here.

1033
00:55:06,751 --> 00:55:08,309
Oh, come on, man.

1034
00:55:08,486 --> 00:55:11,284
<i>If that old lady from
Murder, She Wrote can do this...</i>

1035
00:55:11,455 --> 00:55:13,980
...then we can find something.

1036
00:55:14,158 --> 00:55:17,321
- Are you talking about Angela L...
- Just keep looking.

1037
00:55:19,497 --> 00:55:20,486
What is that?

1038
00:55:20,665 --> 00:55:22,633
Frank Littleton. That's his address.

1039
00:55:24,202 --> 00:55:26,830
But who's Maria Gonzales?

1040
00:55:52,630 --> 00:55:54,120
<i>- Hello?
- Joel, it's Ben.</i>

1041
00:55:54,298 --> 00:55:55,822
There's no one here by that name.

1042
00:55:56,000 --> 00:55:58,491
Is there another name
you'd maybe like to try?

1043
00:55:58,669 --> 00:56:00,261
Eagle, it's Sapphire.

1044
00:56:00,438 --> 00:56:02,269
Copy that, Sapphire.
What's your 20?

1045
00:56:02,440 --> 00:56:03,907
I'm at John the Baptist's house.

1046
00:56:04,375 --> 00:56:06,104
<i>- What's he doing?
- He's showering.</i>

1047
00:56:06,744 --> 00:56:08,769
Dude, you're watching
him take a shower?

1048
00:56:08,946 --> 00:56:10,174
No, I'm outside.

1049
00:56:10,681 --> 00:56:12,114
Then get your butt inside.

1050
00:56:12,283 --> 00:56:15,946
- What? Are you nuts? I'm gonna get caught.
- Listen, the rehearsal's tomorrow.

1051
00:56:16,120 --> 00:56:18,179
You've only got today to blow the lid off.

1052
00:56:18,356 --> 00:56:19,550
It's your only chance.

1053
00:56:19,724 --> 00:56:23,125
Strike first, strike hard. No mercy.

1054
00:56:30,768 --> 00:56:32,030
What the hell am I doing?

1055
00:56:51,222 --> 00:56:52,587
Stop!

1056
00:57:24,121 --> 00:57:25,588
Maria Gonzales.

1057
00:57:31,762 --> 00:57:32,786
I got you, sucker M.C.

1058
00:57:39,403 --> 00:57:41,803
Hi.

1059
00:57:42,073 --> 00:57:44,405
Wow, look at you...

1060
00:57:44,575 --> 00:57:46,702
...priest dog.

1061
00:57:48,679 --> 00:57:50,704
Hi.

1062
00:57:50,881 --> 00:57:52,075
I'm gonna...

1063
00:57:52,249 --> 00:57:53,682
No. No, no!

1064
00:58:01,292 --> 00:58:03,192
That's so gross.

1065
00:58:11,235 --> 00:58:12,463
Nicodemus!

1066
00:58:12,636 --> 00:58:14,365
Nicodemus!

1067
00:58:14,739 --> 00:58:16,730
No, no, no, no!

1068
00:58:17,274 --> 00:58:18,332
Nicodemus.

1069
00:58:18,509 --> 00:58:20,500
Leave Mr. Socks alone.

1070
00:58:20,678 --> 00:58:23,340
Nicodemus! Bad Nicodemus!

1071
00:58:23,514 --> 00:58:26,415
These are my Cheesy Curls.
No, don't you run away.

1072
00:58:26,617 --> 00:58:29,950
Bad. These are mine.

1073
00:58:30,254 --> 00:58:33,087
This is good.
Things are really good.

1074
00:58:33,257 --> 00:58:37,387
And I'm not even concerned with the fact
that Ben hasn't written his vows yet.

1075
00:58:37,561 --> 00:58:40,121
- Really?
- No.

1076
00:58:40,297 --> 00:58:46,099
He's just drawn this little animated truck
going through a hoop of fire.

1077
00:58:46,804 --> 00:58:48,396
You know what?

1078
00:58:48,639 --> 00:58:50,072
It's actually better.

1079
00:58:50,241 --> 00:58:52,300
Because he's waiting
until the last second...

1080
00:58:52,476 --> 00:58:56,913
...when his mind is completely clear
and he can just say what he really means.

1081
00:58:57,882 --> 00:59:00,373
- Okay, hold on.
- What do we think? What's the verdict?

1082
00:59:00,551 --> 00:59:02,678
Let's just take a second.

1083
00:59:02,853 --> 00:59:04,787
Honestly?

1084
00:59:06,390 --> 00:59:08,950
Looks a little bit like the inside
of a down comforter.

1085
00:59:11,562 --> 00:59:13,052
What the hell's going on?

1086
00:59:13,230 --> 00:59:14,561
But look, no, the rhinest...

1087
00:59:14,732 --> 00:59:17,758
- It's beautiful, honestly...
- No. I'm not talking about the dress.

1088
00:59:17,935 --> 00:59:20,665
I'm talking about Ben.
An animated truck?

1089
00:59:20,838 --> 00:59:23,830
You know, I wrote seven pages
on how much I love and adore him...

1090
00:59:24,008 --> 00:59:28,911
...and all he can muster up for me is some
stupid Tonka truck in a three-ring circus?

1091
00:59:29,079 --> 00:59:31,639
- That's it?
- Okay, you know what?

1092
00:59:32,316 --> 00:59:33,578
Lay it on me.

1093
00:59:33,751 --> 00:59:35,946
Oh, God.

1094
00:59:36,120 --> 00:59:38,520
Please tell me everything's gonna be fine.

1095
00:59:39,490 --> 00:59:41,151
What do you want me to say?

1096
00:59:41,826 --> 00:59:44,124
Sadie, my marriage failed.

1097
00:59:44,762 --> 00:59:48,425
<i>I watch Titanic by myself, alone,
in my room, every night...</i>

1098
00:59:48,599 --> 00:59:50,965
...stuffing my face
with Honey BBQ Fritos.

1099
00:59:51,836 --> 00:59:55,101
Not the one to give you any tips or advice
about your relationship...

1100
00:59:55,272 --> 00:59:57,604
...no matter how desperate you are.

1101
00:59:57,775 --> 00:59:59,242
Sorry.

1102
00:59:59,977 --> 01:00:06,007
However, I do recall my ex
never wrote any vows at all.

1103
01:00:06,350 --> 01:00:08,113
Really?

1104
01:00:09,019 --> 01:00:10,452
That's kind of promising.

1105
01:00:10,621 --> 01:00:11,610
Yeah.

1106
01:00:11,789 --> 01:00:13,916
It was probably because he was
too busy...

1107
01:00:14,091 --> 01:00:17,891
...sleeping with our dental hygienist,
which was great.

1108
01:00:18,729 --> 01:00:21,289
Hey, but your hygienist is a guy, right?

1109
01:00:21,465 --> 01:00:23,023
Yeah.

1110
01:00:24,034 --> 01:00:25,194
You're fine.

1111
01:00:39,283 --> 01:00:42,377
Is this a piece of work?
They don't make them like this any more.

1112
01:00:42,786 --> 01:00:44,276
When two people say "I do"...

1113
01:00:44,455 --> 01:00:47,322
...they're putting their lives
in each other's hands entirely.

1114
01:00:47,491 --> 01:00:49,959
Anything less than that
is doomed to failure.

1115
01:00:50,127 --> 01:00:52,254
Now, the last test you have to pass...

1116
01:00:52,429 --> 01:00:54,761
...before I certify you
ready for marriage...

1117
01:00:54,932 --> 01:00:57,059
...is the communication test.

1118
01:00:57,835 --> 01:00:59,462
Which is very important...

1119
01:00:59,637 --> 01:01:02,936
...given how poorly we've been doing
in that area lately.

1120
01:01:03,107 --> 01:01:04,199
Oh, me? Don't worry.

1121
01:01:04,375 --> 01:01:06,070
I plan on communicating very well...

1122
01:01:06,243 --> 01:01:09,474
Okay, Ben, can you please
just let him finish talking?

1123
01:01:09,647 --> 01:01:11,239
- Thank you.
- Yep.

1124
01:01:13,584 --> 01:01:15,916
- Sorry, reverend.
- It's okay.

1125
01:01:16,086 --> 01:01:19,681
To demonstrate how important
communication is in that area:

1126
01:01:21,458 --> 01:01:23,153
- What?
- Blindfold.

1127
01:01:24,228 --> 01:01:26,492
- What are you doing?
- I'm not doing anything.

1128
01:01:26,664 --> 01:01:29,155
You're gonna be Sadie's eyes
as she drives us.

1129
01:01:29,366 --> 01:01:32,824
- You're insane!
- lf you wanna pass this course...

1130
01:01:33,003 --> 01:01:35,597
...and get married tomorrow,
you have to pass this test.

1131
01:01:35,773 --> 01:01:36,933
Your call.

1132
01:01:37,107 --> 01:01:41,271
<i>- Yeah. Yeah. I can do this.
- You're actually gonna go through with this?</i>

1133
01:01:41,979 --> 01:01:45,847
- What, Ben, you don't think I can do this?
- Okay. Maybe you don't understand...

1134
01:01:46,016 --> 01:01:47,142
...what's going on here.

1135
01:01:47,318 --> 01:01:49,582
Ben, there's two sets of controls.

1136
01:01:49,753 --> 01:01:51,778
I can take over at any time.

1137
01:01:53,791 --> 01:01:55,281
What'll it be, Benjamin?

1138
01:01:55,459 --> 01:01:56,653
Yeah.

1139
01:01:57,461 --> 01:01:59,656
Well, I'm gonna need
a little help here, though.

1140
01:01:59,830 --> 01:02:01,388
First you need to put it in gear.

1141
01:02:01,565 --> 01:02:03,465
- Check.
- And then you're gonna ease out...

1142
01:02:03,634 --> 01:02:04,862
...onto the street.

1143
01:02:08,839 --> 01:02:11,000
Left. Left!

1144
01:02:11,175 --> 01:02:13,803
There you are. Right.
To the right!

1145
01:02:13,978 --> 01:02:16,208
Ben, did you see a clipboard back there?

1146
01:02:16,380 --> 01:02:18,371
There it is. Least it's warm.

1147
01:02:18,549 --> 01:02:20,380
<i>- What...?
- It's a communication exercise.</i>

1148
01:02:20,551 --> 01:02:22,519
You will be graded.
Less than 80 percent...

1149
01:02:22,686 --> 01:02:24,517
...consider getting married in Vegas.

1150
01:02:24,688 --> 01:02:26,918
You know what?
Vegas sounds awesome right now.

1151
01:02:27,091 --> 01:02:29,525
Maybe you can get an
Elvis impersonator to officiate.

1152
01:02:29,693 --> 01:02:31,058
"Hey, my wife. Yeah."

1153
01:02:35,766 --> 01:02:38,894
- Ben, you wanna help your future bride?
- Yep, yep, yeah. I do, I do.

1154
01:02:39,069 --> 01:02:41,401
How about we take a right?
Head back to the church.

1155
01:02:41,572 --> 01:02:43,233
You might wanna brake.
Anytime.

1156
01:02:45,409 --> 01:02:47,707
Sorry. I'm sorry. I just, I got nervous.

1157
01:02:47,878 --> 01:02:50,608
That's very good.
Taking responsibility. Excellent, Sadie.

1158
01:02:50,781 --> 01:02:52,248
More enthusiasm
in the back, Ben.

1159
01:02:52,416 --> 01:02:55,749
<i>Oh, my God, I'm having so much fun!
Aren't you? I might pee my pants.</i>

1160
01:02:55,919 --> 01:02:57,910
Sarcasm, wicked stepsister
of communication.

1161
01:02:58,088 --> 01:02:59,680
- Point off.
- Now take a right. Now.

1162
01:02:59,857 --> 01:03:01,324
- A right? Now?
- Now!

1163
01:03:03,627 --> 01:03:04,651
It's a one-way street!

1164
01:03:04,828 --> 01:03:06,523
Okay, well, then should I pull over?

1165
01:03:06,697 --> 01:03:09,063
No, no. Just go straight.
They'll go around you.

1166
01:03:09,233 --> 01:03:12,498
Oh, my... Jesus. Okay, okay.

1167
01:03:12,703 --> 01:03:17,504
<i>- In about 20 yards we're gonna turn.
- 20 yards means nothing to me. I can't see.</i>

1168
01:03:17,675 --> 01:03:20,109
Here we go. Turning now!

1169
01:03:21,211 --> 01:03:24,578
There's a man.
That's an old man in a hat and a thing.

1170
01:03:24,748 --> 01:03:26,272
Look out!

1171
01:03:29,153 --> 01:03:31,815
- I'm blind, Ben!
- That's enough. We're ending this. Stop!

1172
01:03:31,989 --> 01:03:34,116
Is that what you do
when things get difficult?

1173
01:03:34,291 --> 01:03:35,758
You're just gonna quit?

1174
01:03:35,926 --> 01:03:37,359
I need to count on you, Ben.

1175
01:03:37,528 --> 01:03:40,929
Life will hand you stress
and the key to managing your anxiety...

1176
01:03:41,098 --> 01:03:44,431
...is not letting it contaminate your partner.
- Garbage truck!

1177
01:03:45,436 --> 01:03:46,596
- Where?
- Punch it!

1178
01:03:49,406 --> 01:03:50,771
Yeah!

1179
01:03:52,443 --> 01:03:54,843
<i>I'm pretty sure I'm not learning
anything from this.</i>

1180
01:03:55,012 --> 01:03:57,276
- Are we good? Are we good?
- There's Burt Fleeger!

1181
01:03:57,448 --> 01:03:58,938
Looking good, Hollywood!

1182
01:03:59,116 --> 01:04:03,052
- I feel like I'm not getting any guidance.
- You might wanna pick up speed a little.

1183
01:04:03,253 --> 01:04:06,620
- Wait, wait. Why would we do that?
- There's a parking space up there.

1184
01:04:06,790 --> 01:04:08,587
Gun it, Sadie.

1185
01:04:13,464 --> 01:04:15,329
- I never get this space!
- Oh, my God!

1186
01:04:15,499 --> 01:04:17,296
Perfect.

1187
01:04:19,169 --> 01:04:20,966
Hello, Jones family. How's it going?

1188
01:04:21,138 --> 01:04:22,662
Hello, reverend.

1189
01:04:23,107 --> 01:04:24,768
Daughter's a good little driver.

1190
01:04:28,145 --> 01:04:32,013
Well, you have the wedding processional.
You can go with Mendelssohn...

1191
01:04:32,182 --> 01:04:35,845
...or one couple actually had Captain and
Tennille here playing "Muskrat Love."

1192
01:04:36,019 --> 01:04:38,681
It's your call.
After you boogie down the aisle...

1193
01:04:38,856 --> 01:04:41,154
...l'll start by saying something nice.

1194
01:04:41,325 --> 01:04:44,351
Speaking of that, let's give a big
Saint Augustine welcome...

1195
01:04:44,528 --> 01:04:48,191
...to Ben Murphy's parents,
Ron and Mary Murphy.

1196
01:04:48,499 --> 01:04:49,966
Came all the way from Seattle.

1197
01:04:50,134 --> 01:04:54,264
Then I get into a brief message about
the joy and the sanctity of marriage...

1198
01:04:54,438 --> 01:04:57,202
...and that on your honeymoon,
try and act surprised.

1199
01:04:57,374 --> 01:04:59,137
It's an old joke, but sometimes works.

1200
01:04:59,309 --> 01:05:01,140
Then we got prayer, hymn, prayer, hymn.

1201
01:05:01,311 --> 01:05:04,109
And then we get into the vows.

1202
01:05:04,281 --> 01:05:07,114
In my course, the couple
writes their own vows.

1203
01:05:07,284 --> 01:05:09,115
And that in mind, may I have your vows?

1204
01:05:09,686 --> 01:05:11,711
Thank you.

1205
01:05:12,489 --> 01:05:14,286
Thank you.

1206
01:05:16,059 --> 01:05:17,356
- Ben?
- Yeah.

1207
01:05:17,528 --> 01:05:18,654
Got the vows?

1208
01:05:18,829 --> 01:05:20,729
Ben, where are your vows?

1209
01:05:21,098 --> 01:05:22,258
Oh, I have them. I just...

1210
01:05:22,432 --> 01:05:25,401
I haven't finished them, but I will
have them here tomorrow.

1211
01:05:26,503 --> 01:05:29,563
Okey-dokey.
Well, I guess that'll have to do for now.

1212
01:05:29,740 --> 01:05:32,072
After the vows,
we have the lighting of the candle.

1213
01:05:32,242 --> 01:05:35,075
- It's true, by the way.
- Not now, Ben. I just wanna think.

1214
01:05:35,279 --> 01:05:36,405
Thinking's good.

1215
01:05:36,580 --> 01:05:38,878
- Yes, I wanna think about everything.
- What about?

1216
01:05:39,049 --> 01:05:41,142
I'm guessing these aren't
part of the vows.

1217
01:05:41,318 --> 01:05:46,756
Okay, because I used to think that we were
so perfectly compatible for each other...

1218
01:05:46,924 --> 01:05:48,755
...and now...

1219
01:05:49,326 --> 01:05:50,486
- Look at us, Ben.
- What?

1220
01:05:50,661 --> 01:05:54,256
- Ben, you want two kids, and I want four.
- So what?

1221
01:05:54,431 --> 01:05:57,628
You obviously think my family
is a bunch of rich, alcoholic snobs.

1222
01:05:57,801 --> 01:06:01,237
- You never take the lead on things, Ben!
- And I'm not good enough for you!

1223
01:06:01,438 --> 01:06:03,929
I'm not adventurous enough in bed, right?

1224
01:06:04,107 --> 01:06:06,632
And I'm not as handsome as Carlisle,
not as successful.

1225
01:06:06,810 --> 01:06:08,869
Carlisle has nothing to do with it.

1226
01:06:09,046 --> 01:06:11,537
- Carlisle has everything to do with it.
- How?

1227
01:06:11,715 --> 01:06:15,242
Because he is someone whose opinion
you trust way more than mine.

1228
01:06:15,419 --> 01:06:18,786
Oh, God. When have I
ever said that to you, Ben?

1229
01:06:18,956 --> 01:06:20,048
You just don't have to.

1230
01:06:20,290 --> 01:06:22,053
"Carlisle, what crystal should we use?

1231
01:06:22,226 --> 01:06:25,559
What brand of cheese is good, Carlisle?"

1232
01:06:25,729 --> 01:06:28,562
God, I am so sick of you
choosing Carlisle's cheese.

1233
01:06:28,732 --> 01:06:33,499
- Carlisle's cheese. Explore that, Ben.
- Enough of the pop psychology, reverend.

1234
01:06:33,670 --> 01:06:38,107
Because all you've done is everything
you can to make sure this doesn't work.

1235
01:06:38,275 --> 01:06:42,234
I've worked very hard to create lines
of communication between you and Sadie...

1236
01:06:42,412 --> 01:06:44,607
...to let you know what you're in for.

1237
01:06:44,781 --> 01:06:46,214
- You're onto it.
- Yeah, we are.

1238
01:06:46,383 --> 01:06:48,851
We are discovering
a whole shitload right now!

1239
01:06:49,019 --> 01:06:50,646
- Really?
- Yes, we are, Ben.

1240
01:06:50,854 --> 01:06:53,880
- Guys, seriously, space, please.
- Now's the time. Pop the info.

1241
01:06:54,057 --> 01:06:56,252
Okay. Okay. You know what?

1242
01:06:56,426 --> 01:06:58,894
I didn't wanna have to do this,
but I have no choice.

1243
01:06:59,062 --> 01:07:02,122
So aside from the fact that
Reverend Frank bugged our apartment...

1244
01:07:02,299 --> 01:07:03,357
Excuse me, what?

1245
01:07:03,533 --> 01:07:05,501
I've mounted an investigation.

1246
01:07:05,669 --> 01:07:08,263
One that I think you would be
interested to hear about.

1247
01:07:08,438 --> 01:07:12,067
So Frankie, should I tell them
or should you?

1248
01:07:13,443 --> 01:07:15,070
What do you want me to tell them?

1249
01:07:15,245 --> 01:07:18,180
What I want you to tell them
is what their good and decent...

1250
01:07:18,348 --> 01:07:22,682
...and ever-so-intuitive reverend
was doing when he married...

1251
01:07:22,853 --> 01:07:26,289
...and then subsequently divorced
one Maria Gonzales.

1252
01:07:27,424 --> 01:07:28,789
That's not true.

1253
01:07:28,959 --> 01:07:32,690
Reverend Frank has never been
married or divorced.

1254
01:07:33,530 --> 01:07:35,725
That's what I thought too,
Grandma Jones.

1255
01:07:35,899 --> 01:07:36,991
But...

1256
01:07:37,167 --> 01:07:38,156
...Reverend Frank?

1257
01:07:40,671 --> 01:07:42,002
It's true.

1258
01:07:42,172 --> 01:07:43,161
What?

1259
01:07:43,340 --> 01:07:44,398
Oh, it's very true.

1260
01:07:44,574 --> 01:07:47,509
How can we trust anything
he said to us now?

1261
01:07:47,678 --> 01:07:50,875
We have put our relationship
in the hands of a total hypocrite.

1262
01:07:52,849 --> 01:07:56,842
I didn't wanna have to talk about this
to protect certain parties...

1263
01:07:57,020 --> 01:07:59,989
...but enough time has passed
so the truth can finally be known.

1264
01:08:00,157 --> 01:08:01,419
Yes. Please do.

1265
01:08:01,591 --> 01:08:05,152
Several years ago, a young woman named
Maria Gonzales attended our church.

1266
01:08:05,929 --> 01:08:09,194
She was a refugee who was
denied political asylum.

1267
01:08:09,366 --> 01:08:13,962
If she was deported back to Guatemala,
she would have faced most certain death.

1268
01:08:14,137 --> 01:08:17,072
So in order for her and her children
to stay in this country...

1269
01:08:17,240 --> 01:08:20,403
...I agreed to marry her
so she could get a green card.

1270
01:08:20,744 --> 01:08:23,679
Once she was legal, we divorced.

1271
01:08:23,847 --> 01:08:26,338
She moved to New Mexico with her kids.

1272
01:08:26,516 --> 01:08:29,576
A couple of years ago I got a letter
from her, and she told me...

1273
01:08:29,753 --> 01:08:33,211
...that her oldest
had been accepted to Harvard Law.

1274
01:08:33,690 --> 01:08:37,683
He was going to graduate
in the top of his class, and when he did...

1275
01:08:37,861 --> 01:08:40,091
...he was going to go
into immigration reform.

1276
01:08:40,263 --> 01:08:43,232
And that is the story of Maria Gonzales.

1277
01:08:44,701 --> 01:08:46,532
I keep their pictures in my wallet...

1278
01:08:49,573 --> 01:08:52,599
...to remind me that one person
can make a difference...

1279
01:08:52,776 --> 01:08:54,573
...even against insurmountable odds.

1280
01:08:56,213 --> 01:08:57,908
That's...
That's Pablo right there.

1281
01:08:58,081 --> 01:08:59,139
Ben.

1282
01:09:01,184 --> 01:09:06,121
If you had just spent half the amount
of time on your wedding vows...

1283
01:09:06,289 --> 01:09:09,690
...as this stupid little investigation...

1284
01:09:10,093 --> 01:09:13,028
...we would probably be walking
down the aisle tomorrow.

1285
01:09:13,196 --> 01:09:14,959
And, no, no...

1286
01:09:15,866 --> 01:09:17,731
I can't do it.

1287
01:09:23,907 --> 01:09:27,240
- Unbelievable.
- You're such a jerk.

1288
01:09:29,513 --> 01:09:30,639
Benjamin.

1289
01:09:32,416 --> 01:09:34,077
Are you happy now?

1290
01:09:35,018 --> 01:09:37,213
It's a painful process.

1291
01:09:37,387 --> 01:09:38,684
That's why we do it.

1292
01:09:38,855 --> 01:09:40,618
To find the truth, Benjamin.

1293
01:09:41,358 --> 01:09:42,382
Sometim...

1294
01:09:44,895 --> 01:09:48,262
Why did you punch the reverend?
What is wrong with you?

1295
01:09:49,533 --> 01:09:52,502
Nice right hook, but you are going to hell.
Know that?

1296
01:09:52,669 --> 01:09:54,694
I'm sorry. J.C., I'm sorry.

1297
01:09:57,474 --> 01:10:00,602
Three weeks.
That's a new course record.

1298
01:10:00,777 --> 01:10:04,440
Man, I haven't seen a right hook like that
since the Buffolini meltdown.

1299
01:10:04,614 --> 01:10:06,912
I hate this part.

1300
01:10:07,217 --> 01:10:09,481
I'll get the bag of frozen peas.
Come on.

1301
01:10:09,886 --> 01:10:11,376
Here we go.

1302
01:10:34,811 --> 01:10:36,210
Hi.

1303
01:10:37,647 --> 01:10:40,343
I can't believe I was about to marry
someone I didn't know.

1304
01:10:40,517 --> 01:10:42,644
That's why we have the course.

1305
01:10:42,819 --> 01:10:45,481
It's good that I found out now
instead of down the road...

1306
01:10:45,655 --> 01:10:48,055
...because that just
would have been awful.

1307
01:10:48,792 --> 01:10:51,283
I'm sorry, he just, he makes me so mad.

1308
01:10:51,928 --> 01:10:53,953
What am I supposed to do now?

1309
01:10:54,898 --> 01:10:57,093
- You still have your honeymoon tickets?
- Yeah.

1310
01:10:57,267 --> 01:10:58,359
Use them.

1311
01:10:58,535 --> 01:11:02,096
Go away for a couple of days.
Take a friend, family, anybody.

1312
01:11:03,039 --> 01:11:05,599
- I don't know.
- Oh, come on, it'll be great for you.

1313
01:11:06,243 --> 01:11:09,303
Get a tan, huh? Trust me.

1314
01:11:12,816 --> 01:11:14,613
See you, kiddo.

1315
01:11:15,986 --> 01:11:17,715
You know...

1316
01:11:18,221 --> 01:11:20,985
...maybe Ben wasn't the only...

1317
01:11:21,158 --> 01:11:22,182
No.

1318
01:11:22,359 --> 01:11:25,556
- No, no. What? What?
- No, have a great trip.

1319
01:11:32,536 --> 01:11:34,970
I mean, it wasn't supposed
to be like this.

1320
01:11:35,138 --> 01:11:37,436
Yeah, I feel as bad as you do.

1321
01:11:38,208 --> 01:11:41,405
Now she's using her honeymoon
ticket without me.

1322
01:11:41,711 --> 01:11:43,906
I mean, how is that supposed
to make me feel?

1323
01:11:44,814 --> 01:11:47,681
Bad. I think.

1324
01:11:49,219 --> 01:11:54,350
Three weeks ago, I was the happiest guy
in the world, and now I just...

1325
01:11:55,659 --> 01:11:57,286
Now I'm just sitting here with you.

1326
01:11:58,495 --> 01:12:01,692
Thanks.
Thanks, Ben. Appreciate that.

1327
01:12:01,865 --> 01:12:04,095
No, you know what I mean, I just...

1328
01:12:04,267 --> 01:12:05,700
Hey, it's cool.

1329
01:12:05,869 --> 01:12:10,897
Look, don't take this the wrong way,
because Sadie's cool, I like her a lot...

1330
01:12:11,074 --> 01:12:13,235
...but there are plenty of fish in the sea.

1331
01:12:13,410 --> 01:12:16,072
And now it's your time to be
the king barracuda...

1332
01:12:16,246 --> 01:12:19,010
...and get out there
and swim with the sweet tuna.

1333
01:12:19,182 --> 01:12:20,877
The ocean is yours, man.

1334
01:12:23,320 --> 01:12:25,754
That's the stupidest thing
I've ever heard.

1335
01:12:27,390 --> 01:12:28,982
Okay.

1336
01:12:29,926 --> 01:12:31,450
You're a bear.

1337
01:12:31,628 --> 01:12:32,890
Now jump in that forest...

1338
01:12:33,063 --> 01:12:36,226
...and you gotta tag as many
cute, furry, bear butts as you can.

1339
01:12:36,399 --> 01:12:37,559
Joel...

1340
01:12:37,734 --> 01:12:39,998
...you're my best friend, man.
You know that?

1341
01:12:40,570 --> 01:12:43,471
- And I love you. You know that?
- I love you too.

1342
01:12:43,640 --> 01:12:47,804
But you have got to be
the worst advice-giver I know.

1343
01:12:48,945 --> 01:12:51,971
I mean, not only is your
advice terrible, but...

1344
01:12:52,148 --> 01:12:55,174
...it just backfires at every turn.

1345
01:12:55,352 --> 01:12:58,879
And now you're talking to me
about fish and bears.

1346
01:12:59,055 --> 01:13:02,752
She's a woman, Joel.
I mean, she's an amazing woman.

1347
01:13:02,926 --> 01:13:05,224
And she's just so beautiful.

1348
01:13:05,395 --> 01:13:09,126
And she's loving and...

1349
01:13:09,366 --> 01:13:12,062
It was all right there...

1350
01:13:13,169 --> 01:13:15,034
...and I lost it.

1351
01:13:16,973 --> 01:13:21,171
And I don't need you telling me
that I should go out and find someone else.

1352
01:13:21,344 --> 01:13:25,144
I mean, I don't need anybody
telling me how to go...

1353
01:13:26,416 --> 01:13:28,680
I don't need anyone telling me.

1354
01:13:29,819 --> 01:13:31,480
Wait. Where you...
Ben! Hey!

1355
01:13:37,694 --> 01:13:39,855
No way.

1356
01:13:44,167 --> 01:13:46,829
Whoa! Is that one strike
or two against Rodriguez?

1357
01:13:47,003 --> 01:13:48,027
Two.

1358
01:13:48,204 --> 01:13:50,502
Awesome job with the camouflage, guys.

1359
01:13:50,674 --> 01:13:51,868
Seriously, you got me.

1360
01:13:52,042 --> 01:13:55,205
Who'd have thought you'd be in a van
with "Saint Augustine's"?

1361
01:13:55,445 --> 01:13:56,912
Just listening to the ball game!

1362
01:13:58,014 --> 01:13:59,845
Cubs are off today.

1363
01:14:15,932 --> 01:14:17,058
Hey, Gillie.

1364
01:14:17,233 --> 01:14:20,134
This guy say he's in love.
He come to Jamaica to find his girl.

1365
01:14:20,303 --> 01:14:23,761
Well, see, we were supposed to get married
and then she just called it off.

1366
01:14:25,175 --> 01:14:27,643
Oh, no. It's a long story. Just...

1367
01:14:27,811 --> 01:14:29,938
Man, you don't have to worry,
it's a long ride.

1368
01:14:30,113 --> 01:14:33,241
It's really a long ride.
You can sit and tell us.

1369
01:14:33,416 --> 01:14:34,906
Well, what happened was...

1370
01:14:37,087 --> 01:14:40,716
It is absolutely beautiful here.

1371
01:14:41,658 --> 01:14:44,354
Hey, Mom, you gonna get in your bikini?

1372
01:14:44,527 --> 01:14:45,516
Like hell I will.

1373
01:14:53,903 --> 01:14:56,667
Talk to her. This is for lovers, man!

1374
01:14:57,006 --> 01:14:58,098
Thank you.

1375
01:15:13,623 --> 01:15:14,988
It's Ben.

1376
01:15:20,296 --> 01:15:21,786
- What?
- Sadie, it's me.

1377
01:15:21,965 --> 01:15:24,763
- I know. What do you want?
- Look, I have to talk to you.

1378
01:15:24,934 --> 01:15:26,458
Guess what, Ben?

1379
01:15:26,636 --> 01:15:30,538
You had your chance. You had an empty
book and you didn't say anything.

1380
01:15:30,707 --> 01:15:33,676
<i>- And that's part of the thing. Listen...
- No. Ben...</i>

1381
01:15:33,843 --> 01:15:36,835
...I don't wanna talk to you.
- You don't understand. I'm in...

1382
01:15:37,013 --> 01:15:38,605
Sadie?

1383
01:15:39,082 --> 01:15:42,074
How come I could say so much
and he couldn't say anything to me?

1384
01:15:42,252 --> 01:15:44,311
Can someone please explain that?

1385
01:15:49,893 --> 01:15:51,258
Sorry.

1386
01:15:51,428 --> 01:15:53,328
I was just clearing my throat.

1387
01:15:53,496 --> 01:15:55,191
- John!
- What?

1388
01:15:55,365 --> 01:15:57,629
A piece of coconut went down
the wrong way.

1389
01:15:57,801 --> 01:15:59,428
Your daughter's in pain.

1390
01:15:59,602 --> 01:16:02,400
- Yes, I'm in pain. And I'm all alone too.
- Not you.

1391
01:16:02,572 --> 01:16:04,563
- I'm alone.
- Not you.

1392
01:16:04,741 --> 01:16:08,108
Is anyone at all concerned
with the fact that my life is falling apart?

1393
01:16:08,278 --> 01:16:10,906
Oh, of course we are, sweetie.

1394
01:16:11,080 --> 01:16:13,742
But relationships are complicated.

1395
01:16:13,917 --> 01:16:18,251
- We certainly don't have all the answers.
- You guys have been married for 30 years.

1396
01:16:18,421 --> 01:16:22,551
- You must be doing something right.
- Not all those years were great.

1397
01:16:22,725 --> 01:16:27,287
<i>Years 16 through 18 in our marriage were
something straight out of The Shining.</i>

1398
01:16:28,231 --> 01:16:31,758
Okay, but Ben and I couldn't even decide on
what color napkins we wanted...

1399
01:16:31,935 --> 01:16:33,664
...let alone how many kids.

1400
01:16:33,837 --> 01:16:36,567
And he couldn't handle that
I have a good guy friend.

1401
01:16:36,739 --> 01:16:40,004
I don't know if it's our friendship
he was insecure about.

1402
01:16:40,176 --> 01:16:41,939
Really?

1403
01:16:42,545 --> 01:16:44,445
Listen, I'm gonna support you here.

1404
01:16:44,614 --> 01:16:47,777
But you gotta think about this
from Ben's perspective.

1405
01:16:47,951 --> 01:16:50,749
How do you think he feels when you're
always coming to me?

1406
01:16:50,920 --> 01:16:53,718
<i>- I don't go to you all the time.
- When are you going to him?</i>

1407
01:16:54,858 --> 01:16:57,691
Just maybe...

1408
01:16:57,861 --> 01:17:00,694
...Ben wants to be with somebody
who needs him for a change.

1409
01:17:02,232 --> 01:17:03,790
That's really heartfelt.

1410
01:17:22,185 --> 01:17:24,415
- Does this happen all the time?
- Sadie?

1411
01:17:24,587 --> 01:17:27,385
To go from being so in love to this.

1412
01:17:27,557 --> 01:17:30,082
You know, I'm all alone
on my honeymoon at Sandals...

1413
01:17:30,260 --> 01:17:34,128
<i>... couples in love all over the place.
This isn't what I pictured.</i>

1414
01:17:34,297 --> 01:17:36,731
Well, is it ever what you picture?

1415
01:17:37,534 --> 01:17:40,298
Were we the first ones to fail the course?

1416
01:17:40,470 --> 01:17:44,099
Who said the course is over?
It's only over when you decide it's done.

1417
01:17:44,307 --> 01:17:46,434
I don't know what to do.

1418
01:17:47,010 --> 01:17:48,409
It'll come to you.

1419
01:17:48,578 --> 01:17:50,102
Have faith.

1420
01:17:51,748 --> 01:17:54,080
Thank you, Reverend Frank.

1421
01:17:56,119 --> 01:17:57,279
Right on schedule.

1422
01:17:57,453 --> 01:18:00,616
Hallelujah. Now do you mind?
I need my beauty sleep.

1423
01:18:00,790 --> 01:18:05,420
No smoking on this flight, but you
can light up whatever once we land.

1424
01:18:52,942 --> 01:18:54,773
<i>- Ben?
- Hey.</i>

1425
01:18:54,944 --> 01:18:56,912
<i>You picked up.</i>

1426
01:18:57,080 --> 01:19:00,072
It's so weird.
I was just thinking about you.

1427
01:19:00,249 --> 01:19:01,807
<i>You were?</i>

1428
01:19:01,985 --> 01:19:03,612
Yeah.

1429
01:19:04,354 --> 01:19:08,450
My family said some things
to me yesterday about...

1430
01:19:08,625 --> 01:19:12,026
...me not relying on you and...

1431
01:19:13,496 --> 01:19:15,964
...it got me thinking...

1432
01:19:16,132 --> 01:19:18,225
...about that stupid truck...

1433
01:19:18,401 --> 01:19:20,392
...you drew in your wedding
vow notebook.

1434
01:19:20,570 --> 01:19:24,062
And I know this is gonna
sound so weird but...

1435
01:19:27,877 --> 01:19:30,402
...it's why I love you.

1436
01:19:30,980 --> 01:19:35,212
You don't always say the right things
or do the right things but somehow...

1437
01:19:36,185 --> 01:19:40,315
...I know you would jump through
a hoop of fire for me.

1438
01:19:41,324 --> 01:19:43,690
<i>Hey, can you do me a favor?</i>

1439
01:19:44,761 --> 01:19:48,925
<i>I think you should come to your window.</i>

1440
01:20:08,918 --> 01:20:11,478
I left my vow book at home so...

1441
01:20:11,654 --> 01:20:13,815
...I figured I should write
a few of them here.

1442
01:20:16,392 --> 01:20:17,484
What do you think?

1443
01:20:27,003 --> 01:20:29,062
- I am so sorry. I messed up.
- Me too.

1444
01:20:29,238 --> 01:20:31,399
There's so much to say.
I just didn't know how.

1445
01:20:31,574 --> 01:20:34,407
I need to stop doing everything myself
and share the reins.

1446
01:20:34,577 --> 01:20:36,977
No matter what I do,
I know you're gonna support me.

1447
01:20:37,146 --> 01:20:39,614
If I'm ever blindfolded,
you're the one to guide me.

1448
01:20:39,782 --> 01:20:42,148
I want to have as many kids
as we possibly can.

1449
01:20:42,318 --> 01:20:44,343
Really?
After Macy's, I definitely want two.

1450
01:20:44,520 --> 01:20:46,044
I need to be more decisive.

1451
01:20:46,222 --> 01:20:48,656
- About napkins, about...
- Napkins, cheese, anything...

1452
01:20:48,825 --> 01:20:51,453
...at the end of the day,
I'm gonna rely on you.

1453
01:20:51,627 --> 01:20:54,721
Because nothing means
more to me than you.

1454
01:20:54,897 --> 01:20:57,798
Nothing. I love you.

1455
01:20:57,967 --> 01:20:59,832
I love you.

1456
01:21:07,543 --> 01:21:09,977
What's going on here?

1457
01:21:10,880 --> 01:21:14,714
Reverend Frank?
What are you doing here?

1458
01:21:15,351 --> 01:21:17,819
Reverend Frank is
everywhere, remember?

1459
01:21:17,987 --> 01:21:19,921
Thought you two broke up.

1460
01:21:20,089 --> 01:21:23,490
We did. We just sort of talked it through.

1461
01:21:23,659 --> 01:21:26,822
Seems like we have more faith
in each other than we thought.

1462
01:21:27,296 --> 01:21:28,285
Congratulations.

1463
01:21:28,464 --> 01:21:30,557
You just passed the course
with flying colors.

1464
01:21:31,868 --> 01:21:33,335
So how about it?

1465
01:21:33,503 --> 01:21:35,698
Do you think we should
get this wedding started?

1466
01:21:37,406 --> 01:21:38,532
I do.

1467
01:21:39,475 --> 01:21:42,137
And do you,
Benjamin Fitzpatrick Murphy...

1468
01:21:42,311 --> 01:21:47,408
...take Sadie Wilhelmina Jones
to be your lawfully wedded wife?

1469
01:21:47,583 --> 01:21:50,780
- I do.
- The rings.

1470
01:21:54,657 --> 01:21:56,716
"Never to fart"?

1471
01:21:56,893 --> 01:21:58,019
Oh, my God.

1472
01:21:58,194 --> 01:22:00,754
I didn't change it.
I'm gonna change it when I get back.

1473
01:22:00,930 --> 01:22:01,988
- I promise I will.
- No.

1474
01:22:02,165 --> 01:22:06,226
Bite your tongue, because I wouldn't want
it changed for anything in the whole world.

1475
01:22:06,402 --> 01:22:07,994
No.

1476
01:22:15,578 --> 01:22:17,102
Ready?

1477
01:22:19,081 --> 01:22:22,016
By the power vested in me by God...

1478
01:22:22,185 --> 01:22:27,213
...and the Minister of National Security
and Justice of Ocho Rios, Jamaica...

1479
01:22:27,390 --> 01:22:31,383
...I now pronounce you
husband and wife.

1480
01:23:11,567 --> 01:23:14,092
You gotta turn. There it is!

1481
01:23:27,850 --> 01:23:30,546
Frank, we just wanted to come
and thank you for everything.

1482
01:23:30,720 --> 01:23:33,245
- I'm just fulfilling my life's calling.
- You know what?

1483
01:23:33,422 --> 01:23:36,619
- We wouldn't have gotten here without you.
- Thanks.

1484
01:23:36,792 --> 01:23:39,317
You're gonna have a wonderful life.
I have no doubts.

1485
01:23:39,495 --> 01:23:43,261
Excuse me, may I borrow my daughter...
Your wife, for a dance?

1486
01:23:43,432 --> 01:23:45,127
- Yes, please.
- Thank you.

1487
01:23:45,301 --> 01:23:47,701
- Bye.
- You look beautiful.

1488
01:23:47,870 --> 01:23:49,394
Hey, can I ask you a question?

1489
01:23:49,572 --> 01:23:50,630
Sure.

1490
01:23:50,806 --> 01:23:53,331
When did you know that we were
ready to get married?

1491
01:23:53,509 --> 01:23:58,105
The moment you told Joel that Sadie wasn't
a fish, I knew it was meant to be.

1492
01:23:58,281 --> 01:24:01,444
Besides, anybody who kicks
a reverend's ass for his woman...

1493
01:24:01,617 --> 01:24:03,016
...you're A-okay in my book.

1494
01:24:03,185 --> 01:24:04,243
Well...

1495
01:24:05,021 --> 01:24:07,990
You're starting an incredible journey
with a wonderful partner.

1496
01:24:08,157 --> 01:24:09,317
Thank you.

1497
01:24:09,492 --> 01:24:12,984
And on the honeymoon, act surprised.

1498
01:24:13,162 --> 01:24:14,493
I will.

1499
01:24:14,664 --> 01:24:17,531
- Take care of yourself, B.
- You too, Frank.

1500
01:24:27,343 --> 01:24:29,334
Oh, my God.

1501
01:24:34,216 --> 01:24:36,912
- Wait.
- No, that's what they're supposed to do.

1502
01:24:37,086 --> 01:24:40,852
I know. I lost... We broke...

1503
01:24:41,023 --> 01:24:42,820
But it's okay if we laugh, right?

1504
01:24:42,992 --> 01:24:44,550
It's not okay if we laugh, is it?

1505
01:24:47,930 --> 01:24:50,023
- You broke!
- I did not.

1506
01:24:50,633 --> 01:24:52,726
We still got a siren. My ride's here.

1507
01:24:52,902 --> 01:24:56,201
I like shooting downtown L.A.,
because pretty much you got 911 all day.

1508
01:24:56,372 --> 01:24:57,361
I'll be over here.

1509
01:25:01,344 --> 01:25:05,337
Whoa!
"Be chill, don't kill."

1510
01:25:05,514 --> 01:25:08,483
That goes for you too, Mr. Simpson.
Okay.

1511
01:25:11,754 --> 01:25:13,346
I thought you'd work so hard!

1512
01:25:14,657 --> 01:25:17,922
Just get me a bottle of water
and a rubber mallet.

1513
01:25:23,699 --> 01:25:27,601
Come on.
Thrust it, thrust it, thrust it!

1514
01:25:29,472 --> 01:25:32,908
People, we can do this.
They're not that...

1515
01:25:33,075 --> 01:25:34,804
Ben?

1516
01:25:38,581 --> 01:25:43,018
Help out, everybody.
Motherf* * * er.

1517
01:25:43,519 --> 01:25:45,783
You play cutch?

1518
01:25:45,955 --> 01:25:46,944
"Cutch."

1519
01:25:47,123 --> 01:25:50,581
Let me walk back and cutch,
which is a old game.

1520
01:25:50,760 --> 01:25:52,921
That's scary that I could
say it like that...

1521
01:25:53,429 --> 01:25:55,124
Oh, my God.

1522
01:25:56,132 --> 01:25:57,997
No. Stop.

1523
01:26:01,237 --> 01:26:04,138
I'm gonna look like such a rookie,
because every time...

1524
01:26:04,974 --> 01:26:06,635
Cut.

1525
01:26:11,080 --> 01:26:12,445
- Yeah!
- Yeah!